Ben: (holding up a small fake-leather ring that belongs attatched to a bracelet) Hey, guess what this is.
Carmen: A cock ring.
Ben: It’s a cock ring… for Shane. I’m fixing it ‘coz it’s all out of shape. It’s square. He has a square cock.
Sally: Sex with muffins.
Sally: So… how do you want me?
Sally: If I was a dyke, I’d do you.
Sally: There’s only room for one asshole in your life, and that’s your own.
Sally: Have you heard the legend of the twisted nipple? I’m just kidding, that isn’t really one.
Ben: Thanks for letting me use muffin.
Ben: Bananas and oranges, I’m Basket Man, I have it all.
Ben: (trying to guess Sally’s Tim Horton’s nickname for her Danny) Donut? Bagel? Cheese croissant?!
Vicki: It sounds like somebody’s crossbreeding ducks and children.
Ben: Don’t you know my Roberto side? …that’s scary, man.
Danny: Awurgh, you twisted it!
Sally: Her boobs are blind? What?!
Danny: I’m a pony!
Vicki: Richard Simmons.
Ben: FUCKING WAL-MART!!!!!!!!!!
Ben: FUCKING DAIRY QUEEN!!!!!!
Justin: …I have an elastic.
Vicki: OH MY GOD I fucking hate you guys.
Danny: Now picture a naked guy doing jumping jacks.
Vicki: The worst place to get a bug bite is on your nipple!
Carmen: How do you write “shrr”?
Sally: Your shrrphincter.
Ben: I can’t ollie cheese!
Carmen: I am SO glad I have meat.
Justin: It smells like cotton candy.
Danny: (farts)
Vicki: Not anymore.
Ben: He was nurtured.
Carmen: Neutered.
Ben: (FART) Fuck, Danny.
Ben: Can you imagine a cat full of pubes?
Ben: Back off, get your own toenail.
Carmen: It’s like a Tim Horton’s… err… Burton. Tim Burton movie.
Ben: Blueberry and the Giant Boston Cream.
Ben: My burps are really near hers, but not even close.
Justin: Crap I’m tall.
Vicki: I wasn’t talking about M&Ms with penis.
Ben: It’s called Jumpin’ Jell-O.
Sally: (actually saying “Mmm, foot cream!”) MMMMMMMMRRRRRRRR FUCK ME!
Sally: Mraaaaaaaa do you want some tuna?
Vicki: Breasticles.
Sally: Was that out of your ass?
Vicki: Ehehehehe I’m so cool!
Vicki: No really, what was in the bag?
Carmen: Ousse tu vas mettre ton poisson?
Val: Dans l’eau.
Vicki: I bit my face!
Vicki: He lurves you. He wants to smex your bum.
Vicki: Penis, fist. See the difference?!
Carmen: (probed and forced by Vicki) Why do you want me to ask him…? …I AM NOT ASKING MY BOYFRIEND IF HE’S EVER MASTURBATED WITH A SOCK!!!
Carmen: I need some kind of a warning during sex.
Vicki: Say “She’ll be comin’ ‘round the mountain”.
Vicki: It shmellsh like fizzsh in my noshe. It shmellsh like bubblesh.
Vicki: Watch as I put sexy clams all over your face!
Ben: Screw the crap shack.
Ben: Her mind’s in the nuggets. …buck buck buck buck.
Vicki: Challenged! Can I return this?
Vicki: Geez it’s like Broadway out here.
Vicki: EVICTION!
Vicki: I don’t care much for holding hands because I can’t walk straight.
Carmen: I can’t either… I think we have an inner ear problem.
Min: I’m afraid to get shot.
Carmen: Is 50 Cent here?
Ben: Nelly Furtardo.
Ben: Warning: Incoming n00b.
Ben: What are you guys wanna be doing?
Carmen: I hope we don’t look like homeless people.
Sally: We probably do. We have a cat on a rag.
Vicki: Arsharsharsharsharsh!
Carmen: I hope that’s clean.
Danny: (squirting mystery substance into his mouth out of a water gun) So do I.
Sally: Danny! Go down Carmen’s stripper pole!
Sally: Brickshitted.
Sally: You have the coolest name ever… it’s like, burp noise!
Sally: I just got a big whiff of poo.
Sally: Bacton.
Sally: You would need a safety noose.
Sally: Noodle noodle!
Sally: Let’s get a frozen cake… and have Jeff poop on it, and we can give it to a bum.
Sally: I pity tha fool who don’t put hands below!
Sally: Where are you, Mr. Pee? Oh there you are! ^____^
Jeff: I said we could go watch the footage. How’d you get Big Mac out of that?
Danny: Justin’s is like, spicy balls…
Ben: Ya got pizza stains all over yer fuckin’ pyjamas.
Ben: Pissin’ makes me senile.
Vicki: She calls up KFC and she’s like “Lots of chicken please I need to FART!!!”
Vicki: He shit needles.
Sally: Over the grease trap.
Sally: Le mullet.
Sally: Oh my god, that is SO funny. Wait, she’s right here…
Vicki: Blowjobs; not exactly a trip to Baskin Robbins. …sorry, that’s American. Dairy Queen.
Vicki: Jedi masturbation.
Sally: (lightsabre noise)
Vicki: I’m joining the gym soon. (LICK)
Vicki & Sally: WEOUAOEW!!!
Sally’s correction of above quotie: Illaiillll!
Vicki: Let’s see how big yours is, fucker.
Sally: You can’t get it right wrong.
Sally: It’s a dargon.
Vicki: If you lived with me, you would be evicted.
Vicki: Did you know that when I gave this [lipsil] to you… I had cooties?
Sally: Eew, no.
Vicki: Fez is the queen.
Vicki: Have you been cutting spaghetti again?
Vicki: We shouldn’t make fun of retarded people because someday we’ll be retarded.
Vicki: It looks like a bird came in your car and crapped… and I touched it.
Vicki: Reuuuh! Toe socks!
Sally: Rainbow rainbow rainbow rainbow pony rainbow pony rainbow rainbow…
Sally & Vicki: Rastalions-Faria.
Sally: It’s the constipoopoo face.
Sally: I am so down with frolicking.
Sally: Joy to the menstruation cramps.
Sally: The Tale of the Tell-Tale Heart Tale.
Vicki: I bet it’s all Fabio novels.
Justin: Where’s it been?
Danny: Cheese.
Sally: Stupid idiot cockmuppets.
Carmen: What smells like coleslaw?
Sally: Me.
Justin: It kinda smells like sandwiches.
Vicki: I am more better at le Franche den you.
Vicki: He made a move at me that means he stinks which means he smells good. Come here!
Danny: Is he trying to race me or is he just trying to move…?
Vicki: I do not enjoy string beans on cats.
Val: We’re being shot at because we’re listening to rap!
Annie: …du gay sex?
Carmen: Why does her shirt say ‘Punk’?
Chantal: ‘Coz she’s not.
Vicki: He’s trying to bite some skin but it’s like biting a wall.
Vicki: No, not poor Shane, he’s stupid.
Vicki: Kitty boogers!
Vicki: With your white and black hair, like a sideways Cruella DeVil.
Vicki: Shwing your hair shomore, my shweet Fabio.
Vicki: I don’t know why you don’t wanna see the Luigi hump stuff.
Sally: Donsh you wansh shome of dish?
Sally: We’re dirty.