Quotes (Page 64)!
- "Two enemies, one case, all come together in a beautiful buddy-movie kind of way." ~Lorne
- "You are really gross, you know that?" ~Lindsey McDonald to Angel
- "Stop it, evil hand; stop it. I just can't control my evil hand." ~Lindsey McDonald
- "Me? I'm unreliable. I've got these evil hand issues, and I'm bored with this crap. And besides, I'm leaving, so, if you wanna chase me, be my guest. And remember evil." ~Lindsey McDonald
- "Lots of writing in the small hours of the morning, with odd DVDs on the TV for company, of the kind where you wind up half-watching the never-watched DVD extras because you can't be bothered to go upstairs and find a new DVD, and then you suddenly find yourself watching Val Singleton making a Dalek Cake out of a swiss roll, liquorice allsorts and some Smarties at 4.00am." ~Neil Gaiman
- "The road to Hell? What is our fiscal policy doing on the Jersey Turnpike?" ~Jon Stewart
- "It's appalling. Almost as if they no longer think money can buy happiness." ~Rupert Giles
- "Ahn? How's about we try being a bit less prejudiced, and a bit more inclusive. Not us, just you." ~Xander Harris to Anya
- "Whatever you choose, you've got my support. Just think of me as ... as your ... You know, I'm searching for supportive things, and I'm comin' up all bras, so... something slightly more manly, think of me as that. Seriously. Whatever you need." ~Xander Harris
- "So we made a triangle with our bodies, and that's when I called Xander 'Obtuse' and he got really grumpy, and that's when Dawn said we were 'acute triangle,' and, well, hilarity ensued." ~Willow Rosenberg
- "Who among us can resist the allure of really funny math puns?" ~Willow Rosenberg
- "Sweetie, you wouldn't blow off a class if your head was on fire." ~Tara Maclay to Willow
- "Was that 'no' spelled 'y-e-s'?" ~Tara Maclay
- "I hope this isn't a return. Everyone wants petrified hamsters, and they're never happy with them." ~Rupert Giles
- "You can sleep with me! [beat] Well, that came out a lot more lesbian than it sounded in my head." ~Anya Jenkins
- "Did anybody order an apocalypse?" ~Glory
- "Oh, yeah, that public thing. It happens when you go where the people are." ~Charles Gunn
- "Angel's informant will lead us to the demon's feeding grounds where we manly men will gather round and kill it to death." ~Wesley Wyndam-Pryce
- "You think we should get a flamethrower?" ~Charles Gunn
- "Do you want me to rip that guy's head off for you? Because, you know, I can. I can actually just rip his head right off his body. I can do that." ~Angel
- "If you were out of line? If? You're comfortable with your use of the word 'if' here, are you?" ~Cordelia Chase to Angel
- "I'm tempted to just show up tomorrow with Harry Potter." ~Lorne
- "How are you supposed to joust someone when you partially agree with their point of view?" ~Lorne
- "I don't care how indoctrinatedly you've been 'raised' as a science-fiction fan, there STILL isn't any such thing as Geek Racial Memory...!" ~Captain Chaotica!!
- "Folks, my old nemesis is back. Of course, I am talking about the dictionary." ~Stephen Colbert
- "I'm beginning to suspect that Merriam and Webster were conjugating more than irregular verbs." ~Stephen Colbert
- "We should drop a piano on her. It always works for that creepy cartoon rabbit when he's running from that nice man with the speech impediment." ~Anya Jenkins
- "As soon as Buffy arrives...we'll feel oddly worse." ~Rupert Giles
- "I think Anya's gonna try to cook. Wanna come watch the tears and recriminations?" ~Dawn Summers
- "We've got company! And they brought a crusade." ~Xander Harris
- "You sure Scarface can habla the English?" ~Spike
- "Good one, Cor. Scream very loudly so the hell beasts come to you." ~Cordelia Chase
- "Remember when I said I love this dimension and I'm never never NEVER gonna leave? Which 'never' did you not get?" ~Lorne
- "Lawyers. Don't you people sleep during the day?" ~Angel
- "Can everyone just notice how much fire I'm not on?" ~Angel
- "Yes, we're all heartily aware that you're not on fire." ~Wesley Wyndam-Pryce
- "Better part of a century spent in delinquency just paid off." ~Spike
- "I am so large with not knowing..." ~Xander Harris
- "Is everyone here very stoned?" ~Spike
- "It only hurts when I answer pointless questions." ~Rupert Giles
- "I think we already dejaed this vu." ~Willow Rosenberg
- "Prophecy? Great. Those always go well." ~Angel
- "Numfar, do the dance of joy!" ~Lorne's mum
- "Wow. You're just a regular Hans Christian Tarantino, aren't ya?" ~Lorne to Angel
- "Somebody here isn't real and I suspect it's you. So if you're not real, that means that my head came off back there and that I'm dead now. Dead. And with me being dead and you not being real I can hardly be expected to have some big conversation with you at the moment, because it's just a little too much pressure, alright?!" ~Winifred Burkle
- "I think I'm gonna live a long and silly life, and I'm not interested in doing that without you around." ~Xander Harris
- "I'm your - no, I-I was never a gun. Someone else should be the gun. I, I could be a, a cudgel. Or, or a pointy stick." ~Willow Rosenberg
- "Shpadoinkle." ~Xander Harris
- "I suspect the finger foods contain actual fingers." ~Rupert Giles
- "I don't need an excuse. I think lots of dead people constitutes a reason." ~Xander Harris
- "Oatmeal is delicious, it's not dessert, and you kind of feel like you are snacking healthy. I could seriously be a PSA for oatmeal." ~Hillary
- "I am glad that Oz is a bit more communicative [than Cordelia]." ~Marshall
- "Alright. What part of me being all noble didn't get through?" ~Angel
- "Bye, Mom. Thanks for storing my body on top of the lice pile instead of the maggot heap." ~Lorne
- "My psychic friend told me I had to come back here. I didn't believe her. Then I realized I did have to come back here, because - I really always thought I had to come back here, deep down inside, you know? I had to come back here to find out I didn't have to come back here. I don't belong here. I hate it here. You know where I belong? LA. You know why? Nobody belongs there. It's the perfect place for guys like us." ~Lorne
- "Great googly moogly, Willow, would you quit doing that?" ~Xander Harris
- "Oh, poor Watcher. Did your life pass before your eyes? Cuppa tea, cuppa tea, almost got shagged, cuppa tea?" ~Spike
- "That'll put marzipan in your pie plate, bingo!" ~The BuffyBot
- "You know, I used to punish people like this when I was a demon. I made them double-check spreadsheets for all eternity." ~Anya Jenkins
- "Okay, when I'm marveling at the immaturity, be scared." ~Xander Harris
- "I was being patient, but it took too long." ~Anya Jenkins
- "[Your teacher] responded to BuffyBot because a robot is predictable. Boring. Perfect teacher's pet. That's all schools are, you know. Just factories, spewing out mindless little automatons. Who go on to be ... very ... valuable and productive members of society, and you should go. Because Buffy would want you to." ~Spike
- "You spooned me against my will!" ~Barney Stinson
- "Oh, Kenny, you're more angstful than Angel at the moment." ~Mashall
- "Hmm. Angel and a bunch of monks in the middle of nowhere. There's a party! He should have got hammered and went to Vegas just like I told him." ~Charles Gunn
- "I'm a big believer in rules, and theorems, and formulas... Aphorisms leave me a little dry." ~Fred Burkle
- "Demons. There's something you don't see every day. Unless you're us." ~Xander Harris
- "This place is NORAD when we're at Defcon One. [beat] Okay, I SO need male friends." ~Xander Harris
- "Ahn, honey, we're nearing your point, right?" ~Xander Harris
- "OHMIGAWD IT'S CANCER!!! ... well, no, that doesn't make sense. OHMIGAWD IT'S SENSELESS CANCER!!!!" ~Draca Darkwingette
- "Now that we've had this lovely reintroduction, I suggest you piss off." ~Wesley Wyndam-Pryce
- "Wow. Next to you, I'm downright linear." ~Cordelia Chase to Fred
- "They went to the Michael Biehn school of shopping" ~Marshall about the gang in "The Zeppo"
- "Fire's rarely a sign of imminent safety." ~Anya Jenkins
- "[Giles is] glad, but kinda weirded out. Lots of 'Dear lord's. And I think I actually heard him clean his glasses." ~Willow Rosenberg
- "Okay, what in the frilly heck is going on?" ~Willow Rosenberg
- "I found one of those 24-hour places for coffee. Remember that bookstore? Well they became one of those books-and-coffee places, and now they're just coffee. It's like evolution, only without the getting-better part." ~Anya Jenkins
- "She...seems to be laughing at something that shrub just said." ~Cordelia Chase about Fred
- "I'm supportive. I'm totally supportive. I'm a flying buttress of support." ~Xander Harris
- "Wow. Giles, are you miserable about it, or just really British?" ~Buffy Summer
- "Well, I know I'm back in America, now; I've been knocked unconscious." ~Rupert Giles
- "Who's calling me? Everybody I know lives here." ~Buffy Summers
- "Why would girls want to look like that? I spent years in a cave starving, what's their excuse?" ~Fred Burkle about models
- "I have this theory that the more you are aware of time the more slowly it moves, which could make light speed travel possible, but only if you were to concentrate really..." ~Fred Burkle
- "I love you so much I almost forgot to brood." ~Wesley Wyndam-Pryce imitating Angel
- "But shouldn't we call Wesley first and maybe, you know, the army?" ~Fred Burkle
- "I'm just being a big nerd again, aren't I?" ~Fred Burkle
- "It turns out massacres are a lot like sitting through Godfather 3 - once is enough." ~Lorne
- "I was just calculating pi to relax. I'm not dangerous." ~Fred Burkle
- "I could soothe your ass off, pal." ~Cordelia Chase
- "Enjoy it. Don't worry. Enjoy it. And at the start of your career, you don't have much money, and you don't have any work, but you have an awful lot of time. Use it. Because if you're successful, you will have lots of everything except time." ~Neil Gaiman about writing
- "Yes. And then I'm going to marry Bob Dole and raise penguins in Guam." ~Buffy Summers
- "Oh, good. Cause Giles rules the mighty force of library books." ~Spike
- "You're insane. You're short, and you're insane." ~Warren Meers to Jonathan Levinson
- "The only person I can stand to be around is a neutered vampire who cheats at kitten poker." ~Buffy Summers
- "Yeah, it was real sexy the way she touched me with her fists." ~Jonathan Levinson
- "Once again I'm riding shotgun to everything that's on my mind." ~"The Chase," Christian Kane
- "I'm starting to get used to being creeped out and comforted at the same time." ~Cordelia Chase
- "How the hell would he know? He's like ten." ~Marshall about Wesley Wyndam-Pryce
- "Uh, hello, Ahab, a little help, please." ~Rupert Giles to Xander
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