Quotes (Page 68)!
- "Let's go get professional on this evil son of a bitch's ass." ~Angel
- "But you need a plan, and you need a wingman. This is SO going in my blog!" ~Barney Stinson
- "I really hate today." ~Lorne
- "Oh, yes. That was awkward. You decapitate a loved one, you don't expect them to come visiting." ~Wesley Wyndam-Pryce
- "What are the odds the humans would be the most corruptible?" ~Wesley Wyndam-Pryce
- "Come on, Charlie. Let me show you around the chocolate factory." ~Lilah Morgan
- "The beast's belly. Doesn't that usually mean you've been eaten?" ~Angel
- "Flames wouldn't be eternal if they actually consumed anything." ~Lilah Morgan
- "You are a sociopath." ~Ted Mosby to Barney Stinson
- "Of course it will work. I hope." ~The Sixth Doctor
- "Corbin Fries. The lowest piece of pond scum I've met in, oh, hours. He's about to get 20 years for kidnapping, pimping....Personally, I think he deserves to be eaten by weasels." ~Wesley Wyndam-Pryce
- "Who gave them the bloody right to do that? Can't a man die in peace without some high almighty deciding it's not his time? Let's have a little more fun with him, eh? You'd think that saving the sodding world would be enough to earn me a rest." ~Spike
- "I'm not here to back him up, I just haunt the bastard." ~Spike
- "There's nothing particularly masculine about throwing your life away." ~The Sixth Doctor
- "I just feel a wee bit nervous. I didn't realize dying heroically was such a strain on the nerves." ~Herbert
- "Nice meeting you, ma'am. If we ever need a replacement for Hawkgirl..." ~Flash to a rather vicious old lady
- "Never a fetching mad scientist about when you need one." ~Spike, looking for Fred
- "Right. Vampire ghost here, you sod. Bloody well invented 'afraid of the dark'." ~Spike
- "And your hair. What colour do they call that? Radioactive?" ~Angel to Spike
- "The Magdalene Grimoire, Necronomicon des Mortes, Hochstadter's Treatise on Fractal Geometry in 12-dimensional Space. 'Preoccupied' might not be the word we're looking for." ~Wesley Wyndam-Pryce to Fred
- "Baby, can we grow sandwiches behind the garage?" ~Marshall Eriksen
- "I got that knowing feeling you get when you know something." ~Wesley Wyndam-Pryce
- "He's doin' great! He's already NOT killed, like, a hundred guests." ~Lorne about Angel
- "I killed him. And he forgave me. Why did he have to be so nice about it?" ~Peri Brown
- "Isn't that special. We all have special powers. Anyone wanna trade? I'll swap ya two for one." ~Spike
- "Notice no matter how up-town we go, we always wind up at some stanky hole in the middle of the night?" ~Charles Gunn
- "America doesn't have a monopoly on bad taste." ~The Sixth Doctor
- "I never thought precognizance of my own death would be so disturbing." ~The Sixth Doctor
- "As meat goes, your heart's a dried-up hunk of gnarly-ass beef jerky." ~Charles Gunn to Angel
- "You are one strange man, Señor Angel." ~Numero Cinco
- "The tattoo show makes me want to get a tattoo. Fortunately the obese and pregnant show doesn't make me want to get obese and/or pregnant." ~Hillary
- "Wow. Turned on by a woman holding an enormous gun. What a surprise." ~Fred Burkle to Spike
- "It's like an MC Escher picture, but with wires and flesh instead of geese." ~Fred Burkle
- "Really. I beat out 'Everybody dying in an explosion' as 'Most Embarrassing Failure'." ~Wesley Wyndam-Pryce
- "Look at you. It's like Winston Churchill and a young Richard Harris had a beautiful lovechild." ~Lorne to Mr. Wyndam-Pryce
- "A ha. So you're not ruling out that a human being could have boffed a robot. [beat] Sex with robots is more common than most people think." ~Spike
- "Daddy, eh? I always thought Wesley was grown in some sort of greenhouse for dandies." ~Spike
- "So, I am covered in cherries, the police are just pounding on the door, and Judi Dench starts screaming, 'Oh, that's WAY too much to pay for a pair of pants!'" ~Lorne
- "If these guys are on our side, then somebody should tell them before they try to kill us again." ~Angel
- "I know what this is. You'll never take me to hell, Pavane! [beat] Oh. Well, that's just something I say...when...it gets dark." ~Spike
- "I don't know if you know this, but I killed my mum. Actually, I had already killed her, and then she tried to shag me, so I had to." ~Spike
- "Look what I made! It's called 'Willie'." ~Druscilla
- "It's...Mountain Dew." ~Spike
- "Oh, what, I don't get a goodbye just because I went crazy and tried to rip your throat out while we were having sex?" ~Harmony
- "It's not like I have a soul. I have to try a lot harder." ~Harmony
- "Life's an ever-lovin' bitch, iddn't it?" ~Spike
- "A man can't go off in a bloody blaze of glory savin' the world, and then show up three months later tumbling off a cruise ship in the south of France. I mean, I'd love to, don't get me wrong. But it's hard to top an exit like that." ~Spike
- "Think someone won't notice us firing a sci-fi death ray from outer space?" ~Charles Gunn
- "No offence, Mr. Vader, but I've got no itch to join the Evil Empire." ~Spike
- "And the compass needle keeps spinnin'. And the world gets murkier and murkier." ~Spike
- "Sorry, he's-- Is 'pathological idiot' an actual condition?" ~Angel about Spike
- "I just thought I'd see what it was like to bounce off the pavement. Pretty much what I expected." ~Spike
- "What about-- I almost said the words 'Molasses Factory' outloud." ~Wesley Wyndam-Pryce
- "Check the viewscreen, Uhura. I've got twelve vampyr slayers behind me, and not one of them has ever dated you." ~Andrew Wells to Angel
- "Lass thought I'd killed her family. And I'm sposed to, what, complain because her's wasn't one of the hundreds of families I did kill? I'm not sayin' you're right, cause, uh...I'm physically incapable of sayin' that. But, uh, for a demon, I never did think that much about the nature of evil. I just threw myself in. Thought it was a party. I liked the rush, I liked the crunch...I never did look back at the victims." ~Spike
- "I lost ten pounds; my suits are wearing me." ~Barney Stinson
- "I'm a vision of hotliness." ~Cordelia Chase
- "Feel my wrath, gorilla throwin' barrels!" ~Spike
- "I think I sort of missed this. You and me and the books, kicking it old school, as they say...And I never will again." ~Wesley Wyndam-Pryce
- "Spike! Well, well. I heard you weren't evil anymore, which kinda makes the hair silly." ~Cordelia Chase
- "Is this okay? I AM evil, technically. I don't mind torturing her for the team." ~Harmony
- "Why don't they ever need the urine of an unclean? I've got plenty of unclean urine. [beat] Look. Uh... I think I'm making some right now." ~Lorne
- "All I did was beat up a tiny Texan. It's not like I helped anyone." ~Angel
- "She did leave swearing vengeance. That doesn't usually go well for us." ~Wesley Wyndam-Pryce
- "I'm tellin' ya, he's some sort of super-soldier, like Steve Rogers or Captain America." ~Hodge
- "Sneaky bastards, the SS. Don't ever go to a free virgin blood party. Turns out, it's probably a trap." ~Spike
- "Spike's not in the SS, he just likes wearin' the jacket." ~Angel
- "Check the torpedoes before I stuff you in a tube and send you for a swim, Captain." ~Angel to Spike
- "We all need a reason to live, even if we're already dead." ~Lawson
- "I know how to count to zero!" ~Roseanne Conner when Dan questioned her ability to check for a pulse
- "99.999...ad infinitum percent of the best relationships in the recorded history of the world have had to make do with Acceptable Happiness. I defy your gypsy curse when there's a beautiful, engaging...alright, occasionally hirsuite young woman who actually wants you." ~Wesley Wyndam-Pryce
- "I'm not that guy. That guy is charming and funny and... emotionally useful. I'm the guy in a dark corner with the blood habit and the 200 years of psychic baggage." ~Angel
- "I do NOT have PUPPET CANCER!" ~Angel
- "Stupid, limey piece of crap!" ~Angel to Spike
- "If cavemen and astronauts got into a fight, who would win?" ~Spike
- "Are you saying we should start annoying other people?" ~Spike to Angel
- "I've fought plenty of mummies, and none of 'em were as pretty as you. Almost none." ~Spike to Fred
- "Well. I'll be damned all over again." ~Angel
- "Here's the thing, Eve: You're going to sing for me, and I'm going to read you right now. And here's one more thing: Winifred Burkle once told me after a sinful amount of Chinese food, and in lieu of absolutely nothing, 'I think a lot of people would choose to be green. Your shade, if they had the choice.' If I hear one note—one quarter-note—that tells me you had any involvement, these two won't even have time to kill you. Oh, and anything by Diana Warren will also result in your death—well, except 'Rhythm of the Night.'" ~Lorne
- "Well, nothin's written in stone—lately—but, uh, if I was about to face your future, I'd make like Carmen Miranda...and die." ~Lorne
- "I am not—I am not the damsel in distress. I am not some case. I have to work this. I lived in a cave for 5 years in a world where they killed my kind like cattle. I am not going to be cut down by some monster flu. I am better than that!" ~Fred Burkle
- "This goes all the way through to the other side. So, I figure, there's a bloke somewhere around New Zealand standing on a bridge like this one, looking back down at us. All the way down. There's a hole in the world. Feels like we ought to have known." ~Spike
- "It's like a bloody tease. It's like, 'Here's what a bottle of Jack would look like, if you actually had one.' Or, 'Here's a drink, but it's very far away.'" ~Spike, examining an airplane-sized bottle of Jack Daniels
- "[raises hand] Flash fried in a pillar of fire savin' the world. I got better." ~Spike
- "Never a witch around when you need one." ~Wesley Wyndam-Pryce
- "I don't remember seeing 'Stab Gunn' on the agenda this morning." ~Angel
- "You're about as low as it gets, Knox, but you're a part of humanity. That isn't always pretty, but it's a hell of a lot better than what came before. And if it comes down to a choice between [Illyria and Knox], then yes, I would fight for his life, just like any other human's. Because that's what people do." ~Angel
- "The fight's comin', Angel. We both feel it... and it's gonna be a hell of a lot bigger than Illyria. Things are gonna get ugly. That's where I live." ~Spike
- "There's hope...for some. There's hope that you'll find something worthy, that your life will lead you to some joy, that after everything, you can still be surprised." ~Wesley Wyndam-Pryce
- "He looks hot, in that suit." ~Marshall about Angel (or possibly Lindsey)
- "This isn't a meeting, this is you being annoying." ~Angel to Spike
- "Why am I always recognizance? I should get a decently flash gig, like 'Rescue the girl,' or 'Steal the emerald with the girl'." ~Spike
- "Hate to break it to you, mate, but bad things always happen everywhere." ~Spike
- "Welcome to the planet. We all paint on our happy faces every day, when all we really wanted is to pound the neighbor's missis, steal his Ben Franklins, and while we're at it, not think about the third of the world that's starving to death." ~Spike
- "Which Apocalypse? The one last year, or the year before that?" ~Angel
- "Heroes don't accept the world the way it is, they fight it." ~Lindsey McDonald
- "[Illyria]'s either counting oxygen molecules, or analyzing the petrie dish she just put into her mouth. Or sleeping. I can never quite tell." ~Wesley Wyndam-Pryce
- "I've been hitting the half-breed. He makes noise." ~Illyria
- "Keep in mind, [Angel] can't get laid without maybe going crazy. Makes it funny." ~Spike
- "The thing that killed my friend just saved me. No one knows why. This place just went Poseidon on my ass. I don't know which way is up." ~Charles Gunn
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