Kristie wrote:
The holidays always put me in a downward spiral and, to add insult to injury, I was having the worst day of my life. My boss let me go because he had hired too many people, I missed the early train home so I had to wait for eternity for the next one, and had no money to buy gifts to kill the time. I was just standing there, wallowing in my grief. Nothing, absolutely nothing, could make me feel better...or so I thought.

HWDF wrote:
With shoulders hunched against the biting wind of an early December day, I nearly missed the cheery call of a candy vendor who was now approaching my doorway retreat. "Chocolates?" she sang out, offering me a delectable truffle. "Why, thank you!" I replied in amazement, suddenly realizing that I had also missed lunch. "What's the occasion?" I asked.
"Oh, we're promoting the opening of the new film, 'Chocolat'," she said with a smile. "We're running a sneak preview at the MFA, and if you hurry, you'll be just in time. What's more," she added with a wink, "admission is free!"
Well, you didn't have to ask me twice! Thanking the good woman profusely, I double-timed it to the Museum. Could life get any better, I wondered?

Langley wrote:
As I approached the museum, I saw thousands of fans lined up outside, trying to get in to see "Chocolat."
"Oh, no!" I cried as my newly-bolstered spirits withered and the blustery wind literally carried my voice away. How in the world was I going to get inside to see the movie I'd been dying to see all year? I quickly scanned the crowd, hoping to see someone I knew. And then I saw Sarah, standing in line and dressed for ultimate warmth in a Wera Vang Winter Wonderland Creation! "Sarah!" I called out, and she turned toward me, called my name in recognition, and then said, "I've been waiting for a friend, but she's a no-show, so why don't you take her place in line with me?" I quickly sucked my teeth to make sure there were no chocolate remnants lurking, then I smiled confidently and accepted her invitation.

Meeps wrote:
Finally we got inside ... People were milling around all over. You could get free samples of chocolate at a long table to the left of the front entrance. But since I definitely don’t like crowds, I let my friend go over and see, if she could snatch up a piece or two. While I found a spot a bit more out of the throng for us to wait at, until the movie started.And then I suddenly saw him - a slim man in a dark coat. He was talking to a tall dark haired woman, and looking every bit as nervous, as I felt. But it couldn’t be! Surely not ...
I looked up at the poster for the arrangement hanging on the wall above me. Nope. Nothing about any star being here today. But that smile ... wow ....

HWDF wrote:
And then, just as suddenly, he was gone, swallowed up in the milling crowd. My heart sank in bitter disappointment as I strained to catch another glimpse of the mysterious stranger. Was it really HIM?
But before I was allowed any further reflection, I saw that the crowd was entering the theater and, also anxious to get a good seat, I dejectedly joined them.
And then the impossible happened! Just before the lights went down, the tall dark stranger appeared at my left and shyly asked if he could take the aisle seat. Nodding in stunned amazement, I blurted out: "What are you DOING here?" "Oh, I'm so embarrassed," he whispered softly as he slid into the seat. "I overslept and missed one of my cues."
Now totally confused, I turned my attention to the silver screen, trying to ignore the god seated at my left. Soon I was totally transported into the world of "Chocolat," and mesmerized by the dashing Roux. I giggled softly as I watched Vianne emerging through a doorway with a tray laden with chocolates, and craned my neck to see Johnny follow with the tray of turkey. But nothing!!!!
At that moment, I was aware of a stirring at my left, and a voice saying, "This is where I come in." Two steps into the aisle, however, the tall stranger turned on his heel, extended his hand, and whispered, "Care to join me?"
And totally transfixed, I accepted his outstretched hand, floated down the aisle, stepped into the silver screen, and entered the World of Chocolat!

Langley wrote:
And what a world it was! The sense of sweetness and goodness was everywhere: on trees, in ponds, under rocks…it was almost tangible. I felt as though I recognized and knew all the people here…good people, honest people, common people. Many waved at the tall stranger, and several called out, “Welcome back, Great One!”
The tall stranger’s countenance had changed, too. No longer shy or uncomfortable, he appeared totally at ease with himself and his surroundings. He was smiling pleasantly, his eyes full of sunshine and light as he perused our surroundings, his face filled with serenity. “Welcome to the World of Sweetness, my lady, where peace, joy, honesty, and love reign supreme.”
How could this be? Why, just a few minutes ago, I was sitting in a movie theater…
“I owe you an explanation, Fair Lady,” he spoke softly to me. “You see, your world is on the other side of that silver screen, from whence we came, but when we passed through the screen, we entered another dimension…the World of Sweetness. I come here as often as possible, but alas, of necessity, I must make forays into your world…to seek out the few remaining good souls and bring them here, where they can learn to let their lights truly shine.”

Meeps wrote:
"B-b-but ... then I shouldn’t b-be here," I am afraid I stuttered a bit. "I am not sweet. Not totally, that is .... nobody is, I guess. Just an hour ago, I was busy inventing ways to make my boss feel pretty un-comfortable - buckets of cold ice water down his back on a hot summer day and that sort of thing."
I stood looking down and wondering what would happen next.

Chaz (with a lot of help from Carlos) wrote:
"Fair Lady, you are here because we need your help, not because you are sweet," the Great One said to me. "But you are sweet, too…as sweet as a foil wrapped chocolate football."
"Me? Sweet? Oh thank you Great One, but how can I help you? I am nobody, just an ordinary person."
"But you are wrong, my Lady. You possess something no other person in your world possesses. You are the last survivor of the long line of Shock-O-Laytz, an ancient family who had great and mysterious powers."
"Shock-O-Laytz? That sounds familiar to me somehow. How do you spell that?" "S-h-o-c-k-O-L-a-y-t-z. Yes, fair Lady, Shock-O-Laytz. And you are the only one who can help this World of Sweetness because only you possess the power that we need. You see, something is dreadfully wrong here."

HWDF wrote:
"Dreadfully wrong!!! HERE???" I echoed in total mystification. What could be wrong in this seemingly perfect world of cotton candy confections???!!!
"Come, my Lady, let me explain," the Great One replied, leading me down a garden path to a gumdrop-laden gingerbread house. As he held the door, I stepped across the threshold into a sun- drenched parlor - only to be offered a cup of tea by my good friend Sarah! (Mercifully minus the Wera Vang.) Before I could recover my composure, who should join us but the candy vendor, bearing a tray of cakes and dainties!
"Mrs. Muffet," she smiled in introduction. "I'm sure the Great One has told you it's no accident you're here."
"Perhaps we should all sit down," the Great One said, offering me a cricket rocker, while Sarah sat on a stool and Mrs. Muffet sat on a tuffet.
"Something foul has descended on our fair village," the Great One began. "The likes of which we have never seen before. A creature - dark and malevolent."
"You've seen this creature?" I inquired. "What does he look like?"
"He's difficult to describe," Mrs. Muffet explained. "He has a head like a gnarled walnut - or maybe a dried out prune."
"Yes, but his skin is a sickening shade of green," Sarah added.
"And he's vowed to strip the village of everything sweet and good," the Great One continued.
"And yet ....."
"Yes?" I prodded.
"Well ... he seems strangely familiar, somehow."
"Does he have a name?" I asked.
"We call him ‘The Mean One’. And that's why we need your help - to drive this menace from our midst."
"But I'm just the last of the Shock-O-Laytz!" I protested. "What power do I have to help the World of Sweetness?"

Langley wrote:
With that, Mrs. Muffet and Sarah exchanged knowing glances and quietly excused themselves, leaving me alone in the room with the Great One. He approached me, took the cup of tea from my hand, and set it aside. Without a word, he gently took both of my hands in his and beckoned me to stand. I expected him to step backward as I stood up from my chair, but he didn’t. Instead, he slowly pulled me to him, wrapping my arms around his neck, then wrapping his own arms around my waist. His handsome and clean-shaven face was inches from mine, his full lips set in a soft smile, his dark eyes shining as they looked deeply into my own. In a whisper, he said, “Do you not know, My Lady?” I was breathless as his lips found mine and gently caressed them in the softest and most delicious kiss I had ever experienced...a long, lingering, sensual kiss, his tongue flirting with my lips and tongue. “Ah, I have waited so long for this moment,” he whispered between kisses. “The smell of your hair, the taste of your mouth, your arms around me, your body pressed against me, your soft moans as I kiss you...you ask what power you have, My Lady. Is it not apparent?”

Mamarazzi wrote:
Just when I was about to melt in his mouth like fine chocolate, the front door flew open, slamming against the wall with a BANG and knocking gumdrops and Hershey's Kisses off the walls. "Great One!!!" a man with a black beret and very wild black hair shouted. "It's the Mean One...he's wreaking havoc just outside the village!!! You and the Shock-O-Laytz must come at once!!!"

Meeps wrote:
The Great One looked rather exasperated at the man, but then sighed and turned to me. "Will you help?"
"I will try," I hedged. "This sounds more like a case of calling the police to me, but I will see, what I can do."
We ran outside and could immediately hear noise - yelling, screaming and crashing noises off to our left. So we ran in that direction - hand in hand :-)
A green ... yes, green! man was hitting everything he could get at with a long stick, and yelling not so polite things at the people around him. I looked at him - then at the Great One. Well, one might as well get it over with, I thought. So with a certain reluctance, I let go of the Great One’s hand - stepped forward, and said "What do you want? Please, can’t we talk about it?"
I ventured a quick glance at the Great One, and he was smiling so beautifully at me, that my heart felt like chocolate - melting chocolate, that is ;-)
Then the green man snarled "What I want, you f#§&%/ing idiots!?!"

Chaz (with lots of help from Carlos) wrote:
“No more sweetness, I am sick of sweetness, I am sick-sick-SICK of sweetness! I want sour, like dill pickles, is what I want!! Tear down these stupid ginger bread houses and throw into the dumpster the Hershey’s Kisses and build every thing with SOUR!” The face of the Mean One was twisted up in anger and his voice sounded like a snarl.
“But Mean One, the World of Sweetness is a good place, everyone is happy here. You should go to that other world called Earth and you will have all the sour you want,” I said to him with my knees knocking. His face turned dark green and steam started coming out of his ears. He jumped up and down and made strange sounds like he was choking or something. He was mad, he was very mad, he was very-very-VERY mad.
"EVERY SWEET MUST HAVE ITS SOUR!” He screamed. I put my hands over my ears because he screamed so loud.

HWDF wrote:
With hands clasped tightly over ears, I nearly missed the question now put to me by the Bereted One. "Do you remember now, my dear?" asked the wild-haired Man in Black. "Do you remember the power you possess?"
I squeezed my eyes tightly shut and tried with all my might to remember. Sadly shaking my head in defeat, a wisp began wafting through the windmills of my mind. Desperate for understanding, I struggled to capture the thought and give it form.
And I remembered! Remembered the Primal Power of the Shock-O-Laytz: The Power to See Things as They Really Are.
"You know now, don't you," the Bereted One said softly, placing his hand on my shoulder. "I knew it would come to you. You see," he continued, "I was the one who brought you here."
I turned to the Great One in astonishment. "That's right," he confirmed. "The Bereted One pretty much directs everything in my world. If he told me to be dragged by horses, I'd do it."
And gazing into his ebony eyes, I realized that he was right. With my newfound Power, I could see that he was NOT the Great One, the Mayor of this town. Nor was he the wandering minstrel Roux, wooer of Vianne. Recalling our titillating tête-à-tête, I saw that he was, indeed, who he'd always claimed he was: Don Juan, the World's Greatest Lover.
And so I turned my attention once again to the Mean One. Although he continued to rant and rage, his ravings were slightly more subdued, his confidence starting to waiver. Secure in my newfound Power, I took a bold step forward, stared into his eyes and asked, "Who are you really? Do I know you?"
And though he continued to swing his stick and scream his demented demands for Sour, I caught the faintest twinkle in his eyes as his bushy brows jumped up and down in manic delight. It was then that I moved in for the kill: "Were you ever stuck on an island?" I asked softly.

Langley wrote:
“Why, yes, I was,” he grinned wickedly, looking rather cocky.
“Then you must be…”
Everyone held their breath in anticipation of my next words, the words of the last surviving member of the ancient tribe of Shock-O-Laytz, endowed with the Power to See Things As They Really Are.
“Keanu Reeves!”
With that, the Bereted One and Don Juan (formerly the Great One) erupted into belly-laughs and commenced to slap their knees in glee, then Don Juan fell on his ass in hysterics. I felt rather pleased with myself for my quick-wittedness during such a stressful moment, so I tittered along with them, blushing in pride.
“WHAT?” screamed the Mean One. “How DARE you confuse me with…with…with…”
“Take it easy, Mean One, it’s an inside joke. I’m just having a little fun with you,” I chuckled. “I know who you REALLY are…you’re Jim Carrey.”
And with that, the Mean One straighted up and stood tall and proud, a happy grin on his prunely green face. “Yes, I am, do you know my movies?”
“Wait just a damned minute here,” the Bereted One said. “Jim Carrey? You mean, the GRINCH?” “Dammit, I THOUGHT you looked familiar!” said Don Juan with exasperation.
“None other,” said Carrey.
“Awww, shit!” said The Bereted One. “Carrey, you’ve got the wrong f---ing world. This isn’t The Grinch’s world, you a--hole! And besides, you’re FINISHED with the Grinch’s world.”
“Huh?” said Carrey. “It’s NOT? I AM?”
“F--- NO and Hell YES!” said Don Juan. “We should’ve left you on that damned island, Jim,” he said, shaking his head in disgust.
Was it possible that I saw the Grinch’s face turn purple? He snorted and stomped, screamed and shouted, “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”
“What’s wrong, Carrey, having a difficult time giving up the character?” the Bereted One remarked snidely.
“Been there, done that,” retorted Don Juan, with a grin somewhere between Dr. Hunter S. Thompson and Edward D. Wood, Jr.
And with that, the Grinch took off running with all his might, crashing through the silver screen, never to be seen or heard from again in the World of Sweetness.
“Ah, My Lady, what magical powers you possess!” said Don Juan. “And now, at last, it is our time together.”
And with a sweeping bow and a delicate kiss to my hand, he led me to the gingerbread house, closed the door, and threw the Snicker’s bolt. Immediately, his passion erupted like gasoline thrown on a fire. He planted my face and neck with delicious kisses, and we found ourselves madly caressing, touching, tasting, hastily removing clothing…
“Miss…Miss?”
“Huh?” I said as my eyes opened in confusion.
“Miss, the movie’s over…it’s time to leave now.”
“What? Huh? Was I asleep?”
“I’m afraid so, Miss. Time to leave now, please.”
I couldn’t believe it…I’d slept through the movie “Chocolat”? And the World of Sweetness was only a dream? Dejectedly, I departed the theater and caught the mid-town bus toward home, berating myself for falling asleep in the one movie I’d been waiting to see all year. It was understandable, though, because I’d had only 4 hours’ sleep in the last 48 due to a lengthy project at work before my boss had let me go. The bastard.
The windows of the bus were steamed with condensation as I forlornly stared out at the passing city. At a traffic light, through the hazy windows, I saw two men walking down the street…a slim man in a dark coat, with a black knit cap pulled over his long dark hair, and a shorter man in a black beret, with wild black hair. Did they wave at me? I frantically reached into my coat pocket for a Kleenex to wipe the fog from the window, but all I found was a foil-wrapped chocolate football as the bus pulled away.
I sighed, then slowly unwrapped the football and put it in my mouth, closing my eyes and letting it melt slowly, savoring every second of the delicious yet melancholy sweetness of Chocolat.

THE END
12-11-00

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