• written by Brauds Editor Scant

The committee chair, Captain Caveman, spoke to reporters today at a press conference detailing the committee’s decision for lifting the ban on transsexuals performing in the events. When asked by reporters how he and the committee came to this decision, he replied, “Caaaptaaaain Caaaaaaavemaaaaaaaaan!”

Despite the committee’s chair unwillingness to speak, former chair Scooby-Doo had plenty to say on the situation.

"We don’t want these rocksucking raggots here,” said Scooby-Doo, who recently stepped down as the chair of the committee to pursue a career in movies. Despite having two very successful films — Scooby isn’t happy with leaving his position. Scooby said that allowing transsexuals to compete in the Laff-A-Lympics will change the scope of competition, and is a big mistake on the part of the new commissioner.

“Raptain Raveman is a rucking romo,” screamed Scooby as hurried into the Mystery Van attempting to dodge reporters.

Yogi Bear, a staple of the Laff-A-Lympics, would not comment on the Scooby slur, but is rumored to have taken offense to it. As Dooshbag.org reported last summer, Yogi Bear came out of the closet with his long time “boo”, Boo-Boo.

Longtime Laff-A-Lympic announcer Snagglepuss said that he thought this move was inevitable, and will only make competition stronger. He doesn’t understand the former commissioner’s distemper for transsexuals, and said that while Scooby was in office rumors circulated that he had little tolerance for homosexuals in general.

“Heavens to Murgatroid, I don’t understand what his problem is,” Snagglepuss said. “So they like to take it in the exit, stage right even, who really cares?”

While there seems to be conflicting opinions on the situation, there seems to be only one person who will actually take advantage of the offer — a transsexual named Hannah Barbera.