Some Assembly Required Quotes

• Buffy-"Are you crazy. You don't just sneak up on people in a cemetery. You make noise when you walk. You stomp..Or yodel."

• Angel-"Danced with is a pretty loose term. Mated with might be closer."
• Buffy-"Don't you think you are being a little unfair. It was one little dance. Which,by the way, I only did to make you crazy. Behold my success."

• Angel-"See everytime we fight you bring up the vampire thing."

• Giles-"I was just... working on.."
• Buffy-"Your pick up lines."

• Buffy-"Being called an idiot tends to take people out of the dating mood."
• Xander-"Well, it actually kind of turns me on."
• Buffy-"I fear you."

• Buffy-"You also might wanna' avoid words like 'amenable' and 'indecorous'. You know? Speak English, not whatever they speak in, uh..."
• Giles-"England?"
• Buffy-"Yeah. You just say, 'Hey, I got a thing. You maybe have a thing. Maybe we could have a thing?'"
• Giles-"Well thank you, Cyrano."
• Buffy-"I'm not finished. Then you say, 'How do you feel about Mexican?'"
• Giles-"About Mexicans?"
• Buffy-"Mexican. Food. You take her for food, for which you then pay."

• Xander-"So this chair woman, we are talking Ms. Calendar, right?"
• Giles-"What makes you think that?"
• Xander-"Simple deduction. Ms. Calendar is reasonably dollsome, especially for someone in your age bracket. She already knows you're a school librarian, so you don't have to worry about how to break that embarrassing news to her."
• Buffy-"And she's the only woman we've ever seen actually speak to you. Add it up and it all spells 'Duh!'"

• Xander-"Now is maybe a good time to have a talk about the facts of life."
• Giles-"You know I'm suddenly deciding that this is none of your business."
• Xander-"You know because the whole stork thing is a smoke screen."

• Giles-"Grave Robbery? That's new. Interesting."
• Buffy-"I know you meant gross and distrubing."
• Giles-"Yes,Yes. Terrible thing. Must put a stop to it damn it."

• Buffy-"Sorry to interrupt, Willow. But It's the bat signal."

• Cordelia-"Hello, Can we deal with my pain,Please?'
• Giles-"There,There"*//Pat//pat//*

• So, we dig up some graves tonight?"
• Willow-"Oh, boy. A field trip?"

• Xander-"Say nine-ish. BYO shovel."
• Willow-"And I'll pack some food. Who else likes those little powdered donuts?"
• Xander-"Me."
• Willow-"Cordelia?"
• Cordelia-"Darn, I have cheerleader practice tonight. Boy, I wish I knew you were gonna' be digging up dead people sooner. I would've cancelled."
• Xander-"All right, but if you come across the army of zombies, can you page us before they eat your flesh?"
• Cordelia-"Oh!"
• Giles-"Xander?"
• Xander-"Huh?"
• Giles-"Zombies don't eat the flesh of the living."
• Xander-"Ha. Yeah, I know that, but did you see the look on her face?"

• Xander-"You know, this might go a lot faster if you femmes actually picked up a shovel, too."
• Giles-"Hear hear!"
• Buffy-"Sorry, but I'm an old-fashioned gal. I was raised to believe that men dig up the corpses and women have the babies."

• Buffy-"And he broke her heart. Thus possibly proving it's existence."

• Giles-"All right, then. Go on."
• Xander-"You're closer."
• Buffy-"Pathetic much."

• Cordelia-"Buffy? Big shock. She's at the graveyard."

• Angel-"Cordelia told me the truth."
• Xander-"That's gotta be a first."

• Angel-"We found some of them."
• Buffy-"You mean, like, two of the three?"
• Angel-"I mean, like, some of them. Like parts."
• Cordelia-"It was horrible. Angel saved me from an arm."

• Cordelia-"Why are these terrible things always happening to me?"
• Xander-"Karma."

• Angel-"I think they kept some parts."
• Buffy-"Could this get yuckier?"
• Willow-"They probably kept the other parts to eat!"
• Buffy-"Question answered."

Xander-"He joked."

• Cordelia-"I'm going home and burning my clothes."
• Xander-"Oh, you have to go. Too bad. Keep in touch. Bye Bye."
• Cordelia-"I don't wanna go alone. I'm still fragile. Can you take me?"
• Angel-"..."
• Cordelia-"Great. I'll drive."
• Xander-"How about that? Always pegged him as a one woman vampire."

• Giles-"You understand, in my capacity as a school official, this search is completely unauthorized. I cannot condone it."
• Buffy-"Fine. Your butt's covered. Wanna' grab a locker?"
• Giles-"Yes, yes, of course."

• Buffy-"Okay, Giles. Just remember, 'I feel a thing. You feel a thing,' but personalize it."
• Giles-"Personalize it?"
• Buffy-"She's a Techno-Pagan, right? Ask her to bless your laptop. Have fun!"
• Giles-"Wha? Oh, don't..."
• Xander-"Best of luck."
• Giles-"...leave."

• Xander: "For the love of God, can somebody scratch my nose?"

• Buffy-"Love makes you do the wacky."
• Angel-"What?"
• Buffy-"Crazy stuff."
• Angel-"Like a 241 yrs. old being jealous of a high school junior."

• Buffy-"I don't love Xander."
• Angel-"Yeah, but he's in your life when I can't. Take you to classes, each lunch, hear your jokes and complaints. And he gets to see you in sunlight."
• Buffy-"I don't look that good in direct light."

Email: nolesrule@angelfire.com