To feel skin as soft and silky as a new born baby bunny. To feel muscle that is soft in this world is very strange. To be kissed by a man who is beyond the gentleness, caring and understanding that exists in this world would be something obviously not of this world because such things could not exist here.

The average person would not notice such things or would only be in amazement of such qualities. But in a man in this day and age (1978) was extremely unusual. After years of different lengths of wars men began to be colder more brutal often or had fallen apart if they were too sensitive. The Vietnam war had changed many a soft man or killed him either physically or spiritually. They all came back changed.

Sitting and eating the new television dinners while watching the live coverage of the Vietnam war where many reporters lost their lives bringing to us for the first time the true brutality of a war where we were now loosing our strongest, our healthiest, and our youngest of the Nation. Our sons were all going to war and none were returning...maybe a few but they were mainly just ghosts and shells of human beings when they returned often incapable of working any longer physically or mentally.

And here was Cody with his very light skin in a southern skin with soft skin, soft spoken, gentle, caring and very together in this age bracket of men. Twenty Seven years old and healthy. He would have been drafted for the Vietnam war because of his age and health. He showed no signs of the average man who would have been drafted into such a war. Did not have a degree on his wall so the University schooling would not have saved him from being in such a war that took a great many away from the U.S. forever.

So quiet. Always watching, rarely talking, and always able to figure out what someone is thinking without them saying it.

Was as if he could go anywhere and not be seen to watch, to see to learn, whatever was going on.

As if he was always around until one day he decided he wanted to be seen and then he was seen.

So there he was on the couch while everyone else sitting next to him who was in their state of euphoria passing around whatever it was they were smoking (probably marijuana). They looked over at him and smiled never realizing he wasn't there a minute before and offered him some to smoke. He smiled and passed it by. Just stared at me. I know he wasn't there a minute ago but I just kind of passed it off as maybe he just sat down and I did not notice him.

Later on Marie walked up to me and said, "So do you like Cody. He's Buddy's friend."

"Sure he's cute." I replied.

So the next thing you know I'm in a room with him alone but nothing really happens. It's almost like being with an old man who cannot do anything much but hug you. Young looking man with what felt almost like an old body in the dark. I just said, "Thant's ok because it is just nice to be with someone." I didn't really like sex anyways so I did not know how all this came about so it was nice to just have company instead of some man slobbering all over me because I was young, petite and cute. Would have been nice to have company and someone to talk to but with him it was like all I had to do was think something and he knew it. Kind of strange but I guess if I had not bleached my hair so much or been so busy with my makeup I would have realized this.

Marie started yelling, "My husband's here he is going to catch us over here so we need to leave."

So I left the room and she said, "Hey let's go party and leave everyone behind."

I just looked at her and thought 'What a party animal wild child. But she can't go out alone and this man is boring me so let's go. Just because I thought he was cute does not mean I wanted to end up in a dark room alone with him anyways. By the by how did I end up in there the last thing I remember is telling Marie he was cute. That is probably the end of this anyways because obviously he is not attracted to me so we might as well go.'

I'm sure Cody was there watching us out dancing with anyone who would dance with us because we liked the bar, the lights, the music. It was the age of the disco. Marie was probably out doing some sort of illegal drug to enhance her experience as ususal. Sometimes she would forget me and leave me at the bar alone to not come back. Wasn't real easy to get home from so far away. Should have stopped hanging out with her years ago she always was Trouble with a big T.

I suppose if you want to be around people in this day and age when you are from another time or place the easiest people to get adjusted to without being noticed as being different are the people who are really different in the first place who have their realities and judgments clouded by illegal drug abuse. Marijuana and alcohol seemed to be the excellent drug of choice for moving into an area, time and place where people would not notice you so much as being different and would be more accepting. So Commander Cody had begun hanging out in bars and learning how to talk, how to walk, how to act as best he could so he could fit in.

That is where he saw me and watched me carefully. He decided I did not have anything as a seriously bad habit other than cigarette smoking. Which of course to some lesser extent affects ones ability to think clearly. So he decided to check me out.

So he went into the information banks tracked me down through the years and checked to see how aware and observant I was. I wasn't extremely observant or aware so he decided safe enough to move in and learn how to be a man of the 1900's. This woman has enough experience with men to recognize if I am not within the norms of acceptablity.

And that is where it began. I feel kind of foolish now looking back at what all he did and got away with.

Imagine someone showing your friend a picture of you years later with a child that is his and him saying that you were his wife when it really did not happen that way. Her not recognizing that it was you because you do not have a child at that time.

What an awful thing to do. Use someone as an excuse for why you are so quiet all the time when it is just a method to avoid making a conversational mistake. We all thought he was depressed because he was divorced badly after that.