"Mom, I Love You"

By: Dawn Elizabeth Perleberg

"Brian, go get Tyk and bring him inside. He is whining at the door," Jackie, Brian Littrell's mom said.

"Just a sec, I gotta finish doing my hair. I was trying a new look and. . .. ." Brian was saying, when he was interrupted by his mom saying," I don't need the whole story. I just need you to let Tyk in! Leighanne wouldn't be to happy if she heard you were leaving him outside to roast! It's nearly 98 degrees out there!!"

"O.K., O.K. just a minute!" Brian was walking out of the his room, and down the hall to the living room spraying his hair down with a squirt bottle.

"Whoa bro, you really need some pest control for the hair," Harold, Brian's older brother, said sarcastically.

"Shut up! You ain't looking to terribly fine yourself! Now if you'll move, I'll go bring my dog inside, so he won't die of heat stroke, O.K.?" Brian said, a little peeved.

"Geese, if I would have known you ere going to react that badly over a little joke, I wouldn't have come in here!" Harold said, kinda astonished at his brother's reaction.

"Yo man, I'm sorry. I'm just a little tense. I got this bad feeling something bad is going to happen," Brian said with a worried look on his face.

"Your probably just worried that your not doing something. You've got 3 days off from being a Backstreet Boy, make use of it. You need a vacation. Tomorrow is the 4th of July..."

"Yeah I know, the 4th of July usually comes after the 3rd of July and since today is the 3rd of July, it would probably make sense that tomorrow is the fourth of July," B-rok said, with a slight smirk on his face.

"Yes it would. As I was saying, tomorrow is the 4th of July and you better be relaxed. I've seen how hard you been working lately! You needed a vacation and now that you finally got one, you better use it or I'll make sure you don't get another one for a long time! I'm mot sure how I'll do it, but I'll figure it out!" Harold said, with a very serious, yet sarcastic tone in his voice.

From a distance, Jackie, Brain's mother said," Brian, what did I tell you? Bring that dog inside! He's gonna get sick!"

"I'm coming, I'm coming!" Brian said, as he walked out of the room and through the kitchen to the door.

"Hey pup. You hot? Let's go get you some nice cold water!" Brain said, as he walked over to the sink, grabbed a bowl from the cupboard above, and filled it with water.

"Is that better Tyk? Hmmm?" he asked as he watched him slurp up the whole bowl of water. "Geese you were thirsty!"

"Rrrrrufff!" Tyk barked.

Jakie popped her head into the kitchen and said, "I'm going to go visit with this new couple at church and then go get some groceries. I should be back before supper."

"O.K. Mom! I love you! See ya!" Brian said while he gave her a hug and a light kiss on the cheek.

Chapter 2

It was about 4:30 p.m., and both Brian and Harold were spending some brotherly time together watching TV in their living room.

Then the phone rang. Brian got up, went to the kitchen, and answered the phone.

"Hello?" he said.

"Hi, my name is Kathy from Memorial Hospital. To whom am I speaking?" she asked.

"Brian Littrell. What's wrong?" he asked.

"It appears your mother, Jackie Littrell, has been in a car accident and is in critical condition in the E.R. I have to ask you to please come down here and fill out some forms please," the person at the other end of the line said.

"Yeah, I'll be right down there," Brian said and then hung up the phone.

"Harold!" he yelled. "We have to go to the hospital. Mom's been in an accident!"

"What happened?" he asked, barely believing what he just heard.

"I don't know. The person on the phone didn't tell me. We have to go down there and fill out some forms."

Then they rushed out the door and into Brian's BMW Beamer. He started the car and they were on their way to the hospital.

Chapter 3

Brain and Harold had just walked in the door of the hospital and were walking toward the desk in the E.R., when they heard a doctor ask one of the nurses if "a Brian Littrell is here yet?" The nurse shrugged her shoulders and said, " I haven't seen them. Go check the waiting room. They might be in there." The doctor started walking that way. Then Brian stepped right in from of his path, and said,"I'm Brian Littrell, and this is my brother Harold." He gestured towards his brother.

"Hi. I was just looking for you. Did you just get here?" the doctor asked.

"Yeah, we just walked in. So what happened to my mom?" Brian said with a look on his face you couldn't help but feel sorry for.

" From what we could tell and from what the paramedics that brought her in said she must have been driving home or something, and another car on the road rammed into the driver's side of the car. It hit so hard, it forced the car to roll over. Now your mother has suffered a severe concussion, broken her leg, wrist and a couple ribs. . . "

He was interrupted by a nurse down the hall saying to him, "Dr. Allofyour, your car crash patient in room 4 is crashing!"

"Omigod!" Brian yelled, and ran down the hall, right behind Dr. Allofyour, with Harold right behind him.

Chapter 4

It was about 9:30, and Brian was sitting in his mom's room, by her bed, holding her hand. Her heart had stopped around 5:15 when Brian got there and she had not waken up yet.. Harold was in the cafeteria getting something to eat.

All of a sudden, Brian's mom started shaking vigorously, and the beep. . .. . beep, beep, pattern of the heart monitor changed.

Brian ran out of the room and yelled for a doctor. Dr. Allofyour rushed in, followed by a couple nurses, and another doctor.

Dr. Allofyour asked to himself and the other people in the room," What the hell happened. She was getting better, and then all of a sudden this. What the hell did I miss?"

With all the action in the room; Jackie's heart stopping for a second time, her having seizures; Brian just went insane. He started yelling hysterically," Don't go mom! I love you! Don't go!" The doctors had to get 3 different guys to finally drag him out of there, because he was getting in the way.

He was walking down the hall, to the waiting room, when he bumped into his dad.

"Dad?!?! I thought you were in California for the week on business," Brian said, very surprised.

"Your brother called me, and I took the first flight down here. What all happened?" Brian's dad, Harold Sr. asked.

"I don't know exactly. All I know is that Mom was in a car crash, she broke her leg, wrist, and a few ribs, and she got a concussion. I don't know what else happened, but shortly after we got here, mom's heart stopped. The doctors fixed that but. . . a couple minutes ago. . . in mom's room. . . while I was in there with her. . . she started to have seizures. . . . and. . . then. . . her hart stopped again," Brian said, barely getting out the last sentence because he started choking up. He then sat down, and started crying, not able to look at his father's horrified face.

They both just sat there completely dazed. One barely able to stand up, and Brian, barely able to keep from standing up and letting out his anger by punching something or someone.

Chapter 5

Brian decided to try to get his mind off his mom for a little while, before he got to stressed out, so he called Nick.

"Hey Nick, what's up?"

"Nothing,you?"

"Same, so what you been up to on your vacation?"

"Brian, what's wrong? I can tell you're hiding something from the tone of your voice. What happened?" Nick said, a little disappointed that his best friend didn't just come right out and tell him what was wrong when it was so obvious that there was something wrong.

"Nothing, why?"

"Brian, just tell me!"

"O.K., O.K. My mom was in a car accident, and she ain't doing to good. Her heart has stopped twice and awhile ago she started having seizures."

"Boy Brian, when you got bad news, your news is really, really bad!"Nick said sarcastically, not quit sure how he should he feeling at the moment.

"Yeah, it's just really weird, knowing that she's like that. I don't even know if she's doing any better of if she's in any pain or anything! I love her so much and. . and" then there was these big clunky noises in the background. Nick got worried.

"Brian! Brian! Are you there? Are you there buddy?" No response. Nick could hear some voices in the background now, that were a lot louder than before. Then some one picked up the phone and asked," Hello? Is any one there?"

"Yes, my name is Nick Carter."

"It appears that your friend here has passed out. Ca you tell me what happened?"

"He called me up and we were talking. He was telling me what happened to his mom when all of a sudden he stopped talking and I heard a big boom in the background. Is he going to be alright?"

"We sure hope so! If you want I can have one of his family member call you and tell you how he is doing later. Is that O.K.?"

"Yeah." Then they hung up.

"Brain was brought into a nearby room, where Dr. Allofyour, did his best to treat him.

Chapter 6

Brian woke up at about 3:30 a.m. He looked around the room and then tried to asked where he was. He found out he couldn't because he has t big tube down his throat that prevented him from doing so.

A few minutes later a person came in to the room to check the charts on the foot of the bed. Then she noticed that Brain was awake.

"Just a minute, I'll go get Dr. Allofyour to come check on you, O.K.?"

Brian shook his head yes, and the lady who was in the room left.

About 5 minutes later, Dr. Allofyour came in.

"How are we doing this very early morning? Do you want that tube out of your throat? I think it is safe to assume that you can breath on your own now."

Brian shook his head yes again.

"O.K. then. Here's what you need to do. On the count of 2 take a deep breath in and on the count of 3 blow it all out as hard as you can while I pull the tube out. O.K.?

Brian nodded.

"O.K. then. 1. . . . 2,"Brian breathed in," 3" Brian breathed out, Dr. Allofyour pulled the tube out, and then Brian started coughing real hard.

"You didn't tell me that you were going to choke me! *cough, cough*" Brian said very quietly because he didn't have the energy to talk to loud.

"Why did I have that tube down my throat and why am I the one in the hospital bed?" Brain said, very confused about what was going on.

"Well you were talking on the pay phone and then you passed out. Your heart stopped because you had a little ball of bacteria on your heart that was irritating it. From what I understand, you has to have heart surgery a while ago. Is that correct?"

"Yeah, they had to repair a hole in my heart," Brian said, still very confused about what was going on.

"The bacteria is probably form something from that. Now we would like to open you up to try and remove it, but you need to fill out these forms. Now you don't have to have the surgery, but I highly recommend it so something like this don't happen again. I'll let you think about it for awhile. If you want me to,I'll go get your dad and brother. They are in the next room with your mom. I already told them what was going on."

"Yes, please bring them in."

"O.K." he left the forms on his bed and went to the next room to go get dad and brother.

A minute later they entered the room.

"How are you doing son?" Brian's dad said.

"O.K. I guess. I kinda got a headache. How is mom doing?" Brian said, not seeming to care about himself, only about his mom.

"Dr. Allofyour said that she is getting better and that she should be waking up any time now. Just a few minutes ago, I could have sworn I saw her eye open, but dad didn't see it and just said that I want her to wake up to bad that I'm starting to see it, even though it ain't real. I think he's the one who's going crazy!" Brian's brother said, trying to bring some happiness to the room.

"So, the doctor tells me that you might need some surgery. Are you going to have it?" Brian's dad asked, hoping that his son will make the right decision even though he might be scared.

"I guess I have to if I want to get better. I don't want to, but I guess I will *cough, cough*"

"That's very brave of you, bro. I sure wouldn't have done that. I'm to chicken!" Harold said, acting like he has had to much coffee.

"Dad, could you please hand me those forms so I can sign them?" Brian said, pointing to the forms at the foot of his bed.

About 15 minutes later Dr Allofyour rushed in the room, with 2 other people behind him.

"I just got your latest labs back from the lab." Dr. Allofyour looked at the forms on the bed. He noticed they were signed. "Good, you did decide to have the surgery. I got some bad news for you. You are going to have to go have your surgery right now, before your condition gets any worse."

"O.K." Brian said a little worried.

The two nurses started rolling Brian's bed out into the hall. They went right past Jackie's room and Brian said," Can I please go see my mom quick? Please?"

"No, we have to go right now, the O.R. is waiting for you." Dr. Allofyour said in a rather stern voice.

"Please! I want to go see her! I want to go see my mom!" By this point Brian was nearly in tears.

"We have to go now! You can see her later!" Dr. Allofyour said. They continued down the hall to the O.R.

From out in the hall you could still hear Brian yelling, " I WANT TO GO SEE MY MOM! I WANT TO GO TELL HER I LOVE HER AND APPRECIATE EVERYTHING THAT SHE'S DONE FOR ME! LET ME GO SEE MY MOM!"

Chapter 7

It was about 9:00 p.m. now. Brian had just waken up.

"I was afraid that you were never gonna wake-up! Your surgery lasted 11 hours but you've been asleep for about another 6 hours. You take to anesthesia well! I didn't give you as much as I would have if I had know the surgery would have taken that long. I kept thinking that you were going to wake up in the middle of surgery. Thank god you never did!" Dr. Allofyour was in Brian's room sitting by his bed.

"My chest hurts really bad!"

"Yeah, it probably will for a couple days, but we'll give you something for that. Well you'll be glad to know that we did an extra excellent job."

"That's good. Where's my dad and my brother and how is my mom doing?" Brian said, still trying to wake up.

"Your father and brother are in the waiting room. Would you like to see them?" Dr. Allofyour said, trying to change the subject off of Jackie.

"Later. So how is my mom doing? Has she woke up yet?" Brian said, not aware of the news that lies ahead.

"Well, there was some difficulties with your mom. I had to leave the last part of your surgery because of it. Brian, what I'm trying to say is that your mother passed away at 11:47 this morning. She started having seizures again, only this time more severe. She stopped breathing and then her heart stopped. We tried our hardest, but we could not revive her. I'm very sorry about your loss." Dr. Allofyour left the room then, not wanting to see or hear Brian's reaction.

"NOOOOOOOOOO! YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME! I WANTED TO TELL HER SO MUCH STUFF, I WANTED TO TELL HER THAT I LOVED HER, THAT I LOVED HER FOR ALL THE STUFF SHE'S DONE FOR ME!" Brian yelled, making sure that everyone heard, specially Dr. Allofyour.

Brian then realized what he was doing. He stopped and took a deep breath. Then he crossed his hands and prayed.

Dear God, I just want to thank you for everything that you have done for me, and for helping me through my surgery. I just want to pray to you that you will take very good care of my mom. She deserves the best, and I'm sure you know that. And Mom if your listening,I just have to tell you something. First I have to tell you that I'm going to miss you very, very much! I really have to tell you, what I've been wanting to tell you for awhile. What I'm trying to say is that, Mom, I love you.

The End

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