The following statements taken from the following 3 books shows the similarities between BPD and ACOA.

Children of Alcoholism, A Survivor's Manual by Judith S. Seizes and Geraldine Youcha, Crown Publishers, NY 1985 AC

Borderline Personality Disorders, the Concept, the Syndrome and the patient by Peter Hartocollis, MD, Ph.D.; International Universities Press, Inc. 1977 PH

Borderline Personality Disorder by Dr. John G. Gunderson, American Psychiatric Press JG

AC pg. 60: There are three kinds of control involved: the control other people have over them; the control they have over people and events; and the control they exert over their own bodies and minds.

JG pg. 88: ...these acts are used to sustain a belief in the ability to exert omnipotent control over an object as well as to prevent the consequences of object loss.

AC pg. 80 Any switch - a rained out picnic or a canceled appointment ... will bring on hours of internal despair because these events are experienced as reenactments of scenes from a helpless childhood.

JG pg. 80: Borderline patients had much more separation, abandonment anxiety, object hunger and intolerant responses to feeling needy or angry.

AC pg. 49: ...sexual identity problems...and may become an overeater.

JG pg. 9: Sexual deviance is highly related to impulsivity...

AC pg. 80: ...confuse physical contact or sexual involvement with emotional warmth. They therefore become promiscuous, but with little satisfaction from the sexual wanderings.

I see this apparent more in Histrionic Personality Disorder, but histrionic 65% of Histrionic is BPD

AC pg. 63: ... to see the world and the people in it fairy-tale fashion as all good or all bad.

JG pg. 179: The polarizations (good/bad, all/nothing, now/never) within borderline patients repeatedly evoke polarized responses from their environment.

AC pg. 79: It does seem to be extraordinary for children of alcoholics to make long-term commitments, marriage included.

JG pg. 4: Devaluation, manipulation, dependency and masochism characterize and cause the intensity and instability of interpersonal relationships.

AC: Wish for closeness, yet fear it.

JG pg. 33: Two major organization and sustaining beliefs are: "Should I want more form you, or should I be angry at you, you will leave: and if I'm compliant, something will be given to me that will make me invulnerable and less destructive."
(continues)
Behind these conscious beliefs are concerns with the destructiveness of their own aggressive wishes to find a powerful protector. in any event, the basic tension between wanting more from the object and fearing that less will be received accounts for the sustained dysphoric characteristic of borderline functioning.

AC pg. 80: there are those who can't tolerate being alone and therefore cling to friends, relatives, and just about anyone who happens to be around.

JG pg. 8: Borderline persons tend to be compulsively social because their sense of their own coherence and value depends on the presence of others.

JG pg. 97: ...desperate to find someone, anyone, to "hold onto," someone to feel in control of...

JG pg. 36: ...is evident in the need to have people around -- even if without any evident emotional contact, in using radio and television as hypnotics, or in heavy use of transitional objects.

AC pg. 170: ...feelings of depression, uncontrollable anger, and incapacitating fears of disorientation.

JG pg. 9: In general, the occurrence of any mild or brief ego-dystonic psychotic-like experiences in the absence of severe, widespread psychotic symptoms at any time in the patient's past life is a strong indicator for the borderline diagnosis.

JG pg. 3: ...four characteristics identify what they called the "borderline syndrome." These were (a) failures in self-identity, (b) anaclitic relationships, (c) a type of depression based on loneliness, and (d) the predominance of expressed anger.

JG pg. 86: ...the depressions of borderline patients differed from other patients with depression by their impulses to hurt themselves.

JG pg. 16: Probably the most common form of affective disorder found in borderline patients is unipolar nonmelancholic depression.

JG pg. 103: ...manipulative behaviors are often indirect expressions of anger...

AC Have a low opinion of yourself

PH: They feel low, inadequate, or wrong.

AC pg. 49: ...most likely to kill himself, either accidentally or on purpose.

AC pg. 169: "Most people, when their car breaks down on the highway, either get out and fix it or call a mechanic. When my car had a flat tire, I called the suicide hot line."

JG pg. 85: ...suicide gestures emerge as one of the major discriminating characteristics of borderline patients...

JG pg. 86: Almost all the patients were involved in suicide threats, overdosing or self-mutilation.

AC: deny or suppress feelings
AC: feel unnecessarily embarrasses and ashamed

JG pg. 169: ...may cling to a pharmacotherapist because of a fearful reluctance to open their personal and interpersonal lives up for review.