Nancy Spungen Oh Sid, please wake up. Talk! Because what you're saying is like, totally unintelligible, and you can’t understand you. And we called them so that means it’s a waste of his time, so let’s give him a good interview.
Sid Vicious Well, do you know what I mean?
Nancy Do I know what you mean? About why you called it a day? Yeah, I know what you mean. Everybody was for Sid, I mean, Sid was like, I don’t know if you saw any of the gigs but Sid was like, really shining out, and John was being like, nothing, you know he just wasn't giving it any more, he just wasn’t, and he wasn’t shaping up. He was looking awful, the way he was dressing, the way he looked, looked horrible, he wouldn’t listen to anybody and like, you know, I mean, Sid tried to talk to him time and time and time again…
Nancy trails off, losing interest in what she was saying. She looks around, bored. Sid is asleep, Nancy spreads her legs and thrusts her crotch at camera.
Nancy (sarcastic) Shall we kiss for you? (she blows a kiss to the camera)
Sid drifts momentarily into consciousness, tries to take a drink of scotch, gives up, it’s too much effort. Starts hopelessly looking round for something on the bed.
Nancy (to Sid) We'll go to sleep later on. What are you looking for?
Sid (mumbling) It’s okay...um, yeah so like, the only two people that I can think of… (his mumbles become unintelligible, then fade away altogether, and his head drops and he starts to snore)
Nancy (reproaching him) Sid! Sid, He's not interviewing me, please try and wake up. Do you want me to make you a cup of coffee?
Sid Where's my scotch? Yeah, could you?
Nancy Yes, I'll make you a cup of coffee, but will you try and fucking wake up, please?
Nancy stands up and walks out of shot
Sid Yeah, okay!
Nancy (getting a cigarette) Because we gave him an interview, we want to give him a good interview.
Sid Yeah, I'll do it…
Nancy You're not talking intelligibly, you're falling asleep with your sunglasses on, Wake the fuck up!
As soon as Nancy shuts up Sid is asleep again.
Nancy (in a hushed voice off camera while Sid is fast asleep) He's been very...It’s hard for him to talk, I'm trying to get him to wake up and talk to you. I’ve been taking care of him, feeding him good food.
Nancy (to Sid) Will you wake up...please?
Nancy starts spraying an asthma inhaler in Sid's mouth. Sid, barely conscious, tries to inhale)
Nancy Just wake up!
Sid Yeah okay, I’ll wake up. Right, now what's the next question?
Nancy He ain’t gonna drop dead, take it from me. He's just fucked up, I mean he's been sick for three months that he's been on the road, the whole time, I mean look at that poster up there, he's yellow on that poster, you can see it, can't you?
Nancy (screeching) Sid! What are you...
Sid You got the ashtray?
Nancy Yeah, you put the cigarette on the bed!
Nancy starts adjusting the tight black rubber T-shirt she is wearing, she is clearly hot and uncomfortable.
Nancy ...I told him, I said "watch, you watch, the first thing he's gonna say is ‘what am I doing here’". And like the band have so many problems at the moment, and that's like the first thing he said. Fuck. Sweat…
Sid Stand up, I'll help you take it off.
Nancy Excuse us a second. You'll just have to bear with us. I hope you're not really mad.
They lift up the T-shirt, revealing Nancy’s tits
Nancy (realising) I don’t have anything on under it!
Nancy goes to the closet
Nancy (sarcastically) An interview with Sid and Nancy, Sid and Nancy at home.
Nancy puts on a bra
Nancy God, I'm sweating… I've been with Sid ever since the first day I ever got to England. We're partners in crime. We have good fun, we help each other out.
Sid is asleep and snoring again, Nancy looks at him, helplessly.
Nancy (trying to keep the conversation going) Like, Sid would have died 15 deaths if I hadn't been around That's just the way he is.
Nancy gestures to something at the side of the bed
Nancy This is what he does when he's not with me.
Sid has woken up and they kiss messily, with tongues
Nancy It’s shit when people say he can't play, because he can. He learned all the Pistols songs in two weeks, and it just made him want to work all the more.
Sid (to Kowalski, who is off camera) Hey, do you want to make a pornographic movie? Give us a hundred pounds.
Nancy (amused) Oh stop! We made one for Sex Pistols Number Three in Huddersfield. It was great fun, on a dirty floor with a Never Mind the Bollocks poster under us.
Kowalski What were you doing, screwing?
Nancy It was great fun, being dominant and submissive, Sid licking my feet…Oh no! Sid!
Sid (waking up fast, panicking) What?
Nancy (looking at her tights) It's not even on the seam either!
Kowalski Despite all the hassle, what was it that the Sex Pistols were trying to do, really kick the establishment up the arse?
Sid is wearing sunglasses, and smoking a cigarette, giving the impression that he is awake. Suddenly he snores loudly.
Kowalski Sid?
Nancy (jumping as Sid burns her with a cigarette) Oww! Sid, damn you!
Sid Yeah? I'm sorry, I can't help it.
Nancy That’s the eighth time. You've stubbed cigarettes on me, you've spilled coffee on me, you've spilled orange juice on me…
Sid I'm just so tired and worn out. What's the next question? What was that question?
Nancy (really pissed off) DON’T DROP IT ON ME AGAIN!
Sid What was the question?
This interview was recorded for Lech Kowalski's seminal punk documentary DOA.