Chapter 15


There was no way around it…Brian felt betrayed. He starred duly at the telephone receiver and contemplated the events that occurred over the past few days. When he had first met Selena, he found her to be an incredibly sweet girl. But what had brought them together was problems with Nick. The Backstreet Boys had traveled to NH last summer to do a concert at Selena's college. She had been in charge of the concert. In addition, she was also a major Backstreet Boys fan. She and Nick had clicked right away, so Brian suppressed his feelings because she was "Nick's property," or so to speak. Brian would never go near a girl Nick liked-it was an unspoken law that was a major factor in their brotherly relationship. But Brian knew Nick…and he knew that Nick had never lost interest in Selena. It was evident in the little things Nick did. The way he brought up Selena's name all the time, how he always asked if Brian had gotten any interesting packages in the mail. Hell, even when Brian did his once-a-month e-mail checking, Nick would look over Brian's shoulder, scanning for Selena's name. That's how he got her e-mail address. Who was he kidding? Obviously Nick and Selena were meant to be…why else would they spend so much time together? Brian knew just what he had to do.

I'll never forget the look of absolute sadness that I was seeing in Brian's eyes. It was so strong, so passionate that I began to feel his sadness too. His blue eyes met mine, and I could see that they were welling with tears. As soon as Nick and I arrived, Brian told us that we all needed to talk things through.

"Brian…what is wrong?" I asked desperately.

He folded his hands in praying stature and rested his head gravely on his hands.

My heart began to beat faster because I knew what was happening.

"I watch you two when you are together, and I notice this unique…." Brian's eyed raised to look up at the ceiling, "this force or something. There is a connection between you two. You're just so…rightfor each other."

My heart palpitated. I knew what he was going to say, but I just couldn't stand around to hear it. Not wanting to act immaturely, I slowly sank into the couch and closed my eyes. Brian sat next to me and put his arm around me. I sat here a stoic expression on my face, starring at the glass coffee table.

"You two are great together. We all knew that way back when you and Nick ran off and disappeared in the woods together.

I laughed, in spite of myself. I abruptly stood. "Well, I guess you know best Brian," I said sarcastically. "I guess…this is it." I said coldly, for lack of anything better to say.

"Selena-"

"No, Bri. I understand completely. I understand that the past year of my life has been wasted-"

"Don't say that! Please! This is hard enough without you telling me that! All those special times will always be remembered," his voice trembled.

Nick was feeling quite uncomfortable at this point. "Man, why'd you need me to do this?' He put his face into his hands and waited.

"Well, why are you doing this?"

"Because! It's too painful. Too painful to see you and Nick together. The two of you, who are so obviously soul mates."

The words gave me the chills. "I've got to go." I said, blinking back my tears. I didn't want to be seen crying in front of these guys. I stopped at the door when I realized that I didn't even have a car. Feeling like a fool, I just stood there, with my back facing the couch.

Nick looked from one best friend to the other, completely torn. "I'll call and have Candy come get you Selen."

As soon as I left Brian's house, I began to freely bawl in front of Candy, who had arrived in Kevin's car.

"Ok, could I possible feel any worse?" I asked Candy.

"Not only did Brian break up with me, but my supposed best friend decided to stay with Brian and not me." I sniffled.

Candy shifted into fifth gear as we gained speed on the Memorial Highway. "You're not going to want to hear this but-with all due respect-Brian and Nick are more than best friends. They go back eight years…while you and Nick have only known each other one year.

I knew that she was right, but I didn't say anything in response. I really didn't care that I wasn't being fair in my judgement. All I knew was that I had three more days until I went home, and there I could forget about the Backstreet Boys.

This whole bit with Nick giving his mentor advice was a new sensation-and Nick didn't think that he liked it. Nervously, he cleared his throat from his side of the sofa. "Bri, can I ask you something without you getting all offended on me?"

Brian nodded meekly.

"Are you interested in that chick from that new demented group?"

"Soda Pop?" Brian asked incredulously.

Nick nodded.

"Hell no! Do you really think I would do something like that?"

"Well at that party a few days ago you were uh…" Nick paused to scratch his ear. "Quite the flirt."

Brian shook his head. "That's because she was drinking Nick, and you know that makes me uncomfortable. You of all people know that, because you're the same way."

"She started to drink because when she came back from the refreshment table you were talking to another girl."

Brian's face reddened slightly. "I can talk to other ladies if I want to."

"I'm just explaining what was going on in her mind. Besides…you're not one to talk about wanting the right to have opposite sex friends."

Brian remained silent. "Do you think I did the wrong thing?"

Nick looked at the sadness in his best friend's eyes, and they seemed to mirror the pain he had read in Selena's eyes when he told her that he wasn't going to drive her home. "I don't know Rok. I'm not one to give advice…what do I know? I'm just as confused as you, if not more."

I executed my dance steps in perfect sync to the beat and the other dancers. There was one difference in tonight's rehearsal…the final rehearsal before the Christmas Party concert at the Magic Kingdom. I felt unhappy to be where I was. It seemed no matter where I went, or what I did, I had to avoid someone. And since I had to come in direct contact with both Brian and Nick at one point in the routines, it was difficult to avoid eye contact. The bridge to one of the numbers came up, and it slowed down. I started to perspire some more as I realized that I had to act rather seductively around Brian. Normally it was easy…but tonight was obviously very awkward. The final note rang through the room, and I held my final pose only for a few seconds before I wriggled my way out of Brian's grasp.

After adjusting the leopard print hat she had borrowed from AJ, Fatima clapped her hands and cheered. "You guys are good to go. I don't know about ya'll, but I have a long night ahead of me tomorrow, and I need plenty of shut-eye. AJ, work on your quarter turns a bit more. Nick baby work on your counting. I swear, you're almost always off by half a beat. Not that your fans care much…but I would like to see you get it right. Oh, and tie your shoes honey or you're just going to fall again…and this time it'll be in front of a crowd. I know you're probably used to it…but like I said practise. As for all of you…get some sleep!"

The small crowd filtered apart, and I noticed Kevin approaching me.

"Why the long face?" he asked concerned.

"What, Nick and Bri haven't told you yet? Wow, I'm surprised…it's been almost twelve hours!"

"Since what? And you should know I'm only the older cousin to Brian, and Nick thinks I'm an old fart. Either way means I'm too old to be approached with any personal issue what-so-ever."

"Brian ended it. We're over. Through…fin!"

Kevin blinked "you're serious? Wow. That's too bad because you two seem to click real well." It must have been the fourth time that day my eyes began to well up with tears.

"Oh…I wouldn't worry about it, girl." Kevin wrapped me in a fatherly bear hug. "Bri will come to his senses, you'll see."

I didn't see.

I decided to "move" out of Brian's house and spend the remaining two nights with Kevin and Candy. I was truly grateful. It was definitely serious times like this made me appreciate Kevin, being the mature guy out of the group. He didn't turn my pain into a great big joke, and he took me seriously. Brian watched me from his couch as I dragged my suitcase down the stairs. Kevin stood awkwardly at the front door. Before leaving the house, I took one final look at Brian, sitting there pitifully. Say something! I begged silently. Dammit Brian! Fine, if that's the way it is, so be it. Teary-eyed, I silently prayed Brian would look up from his position, and meet my eyes…perhaps beg me to stay and talk things over with him. Sadly I gently closed the door behind me and followed Kevin to his car. Chapter 16