Chapter 7


My stomach felt like it was turning itself inside out. I clutched the toilet and closed my eyes...praying that I could finally stop heaving. After all...there was nothing left inside my body except....I leaned over further as I began gagging again. I felt a cool wash cloth on my forehead, and a hand wiped my bangs out of my face.

I moaned and sat back.

"How're ya feeling hon?" It was Candy, God bless her soul.

My face flushed even further when I realized the sight that Candy would be seeing. Shakily, I attempted to stand up. Before my knees had the chance to give, Candy wrapped her arm around my waist and lead me out of the bathroom. On the way our she stopped to flush the toilet.

"Selen, you need to get to bed," she started.

"No, that's alright. I'll never feel better if I lay back down." At this point in time, laying down sounded just as naseating as staying awake.

"I need some coffee or something," I mumbled. I wearily pulled up a stool to sit at Brian's kitchen island. "Man, do I want to read this?" I mumbled to myself as I opened to paper. Sure enough there was article about last night's party. I realized with a sinking feeling that this time the article spoke ill of Brian too.

Candy studied me, curious to see my reaction.

"You know, they make him look like a player or something," I said wearily. "Awwww....what's this? 'However, the climax of the evening wasn't reached until Selena Palmer, Littrell's 20-year-old girlfriend decided to stumble out of the party in a drunken huff. It appears Littrell and Palmer are not on the best of terms right now.' " I read aloud.

"Now, I've been brought into the picture."

Candy looked at me sympathetically, at loss for words "you know, people are going to think what they want reguardless."

"Well, they certainly have enough stuff to think about I said sarcastically.

"Hey, Selen! C'mon, don't talk like that!" Candy patted me on the back. "There aren't many people I know who could handle dating a Backstreet Boy! I know know we can though."

I laughed "we should form Backstreet Boy Dater Annonymous and have meetings with Nick's new primary focus--Sandy" I said as soon as the name came to mind.

"It's tough girl, and I won't lie, I doubt it'll get any better!"

Sighing, I poured a cup of leftover coffee from that morning and set it in the nuker. "Don't remind me. These rumors...they're getting worse and worse. I just hope it doesn't affect their fans or anything."

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After practice that day, Nick cruised on over to Sandy's place. He felt bad, but he really didn't feel like hanging out with her today. Sometimes her tendency to cling could be comforting because it made Nick feel like he was still wanted by someone. Whenever he told Brian or AJ about his insecure feelings, they told him he was being ridiculous. Was it too much to ask to be able to find a girl that liked him for who he was and not what he represented? He was always questioning his relationships--searching for their real meaning. He was always wary that the girls he dated only dated him for either his looks or his fame. The last girl who he had though really appreciated him had broken his heart. So why was he still dating Sandy when his heart still belonged to Selena? He had met Sandy at a party a couple of weeks ago, and she had made him feel guilty when he had to leave early to drive a tipsy AJ home. She got his number and then called him at 9:30 the next morning.

As usual, Sandy was waiting for him on her porch. It always made him feel bad because he was more often late than on time. He studied her form. She was gorgous all right...but where was her substance? He only felt worse when he asked her what she wanted to do, and she responded with her usual "whatever you want." What was he doing? He needed to get out of the relationship, because if he didn't, he knew that things were only going to get more complex.

Chapter 8