"Don't call me babe, Ashton, and I'm really not in the mood for visitors right now, okay?" Wara said walking into the room.
"Ok, I get the message. Well, bye you two." He said walking towards the door.
"Bye, and thanks for the ride. I'll see you tomorrow." ,Kelley hollered as Ashton walked towards his camry. "So, how ya feeling, Wara?" she asked shutting the door.
"As well as can be excepted I guess. I picked up an old violin today, and it really seems to comfort me." Wara said plunking down on the couch.
"Yeah, I've definitely learned that when you're feeling crappy, the best thing to do is to keep busy and pour yourself into another activity."
"Is that what this acting thing is for you?" Wara asked standing up again.
"Yeah, I guess it is. It's become something that I'm not just doing to prove a point though."
"And what point is that again?" Wara asked raising an eyebrow.
"Ya know, that I can get on without Zachary Hanson. I'm pretty set on getting the lead in this production, I just hope I can pull it off."
"I wish you luck, but this is an established acting company, and you may have to work on establishing your name first, ya know"
"Well, a girl can dream." Kelley said with a smirk.
"Yep, she sure can. Well, I think I'm going to go try that updated version of AOL Tim installed before he....Well, ya know what I mean..." Wara's words trailed as she walked out of the center room.
"OK, have fun!" Kelley said in an attempt to lighten the whole situation
*******************************************************
As Wara waited for the PC to load, she listened to "All My Life," Tim and her song from their dating days. As a tear trickled down her cheek she couldn't help from letting her thoughts become words. "It's all my fault..."
"Wara de Las Nieves, don't think I can't hear you in there. Stop beating yourself up!" Kelley screamed from the kitchen. She walked into the computer room and finished her 'speech.' "Hey, why don't you try Getting in a conversation with a total stranger on-line, they're the best listeners, cause when you don't wanna say any more, you just flip the switch! With me, you know you can never flip the switch." She lightly punched Wara's arm and returned to her roast.
"Whatever, you weirdo!"
As soon as AOL loaded, Wara entered her password and the computer voice boomed from her speakers: 'Welcome!' You've got Mail!'. "Duh i have mail, I haven't used this dumb thing in like 6 months.. " , Wara mumbled to herself
she went threw her mail, and found that most of it was trash. There were also some things from her mom, which she also referred to as trash. After browsing for only a few minutes, the words "come to the 'death' chatroom!" popped up on her screen. "Well, I wasn't much in the mood for being cheery today anyway..." ,Wara rationalized under her breath as she pressed 'enter' on her keypad.
As the chat box popped up and the scroll began to move rapidly, Wara realized that these people were talking about some pretty deep stuff. At first, she was just watching the others converse, but when someone dubbed, "uho15uh" began pouring his heart out about how he was planning to kill himself right after he flipped the computer off, and that he probably really wouldn't be missed, Wara couldn't hold her tongue.
NnSaRaSoDa: Sorry to interrupt, but please don't kill yourself uho15uh. A great friend of mine recently did, and he thought no one would care, but I know I'm hurting' right now.
uho15uh: You don't know how it feels. It just seems like there's no other way right now.
ScRnBBaWl: There's always another way. Although I've never been in a situation like NnSaRaSoDa, I do know that there's always another road to go down.
NnSaRaSoDa: And I can tell you right now that if tomorrow I find out you're not here, I'll feel like I failed you like a did Tim.
uho15uh: I guess I never REAALY thought about the people on the other end. I've just been thinking about how I'M feeling.
ScRnBBaWl: Well, we're officially involved now. And if you don't do it for yourself, then do it for us.
NnSaRaSoDa: How about you go try to work out all those things that you don't feel secure about. I know that if Tim had done that, he would have saved his life, and our pain.
uho15uh: I guess there are a lot of unfinished issues I have. Like, if I died today I know there would be a million people left hanging.
NnSaRaSoDa: See, all these "people" that you're talking about are involved in your life and would be really hurt if you didn't talk to them before you made such a drastic decision.
uho15uh: Yeah, you're right...I really need to look around and see what I have...Tonight I'm going to go and clear things out with my family and a few friends. I guess I do owe it to them after all they've done for me.
ScRnBBaWl: Ok, bye uho15uh, and good luck!
NnSaRaSoDa: Yep, toddles!
uho15uh: Bye, thanks you two!
uho15uh has left 'Death'
NnSaRaSoDa: Are you still there ScRnBBaWl? Didn't that feel good??
ScRnBBaWl: Definitely, and you don't need to call me that...the name's Justin.
NnSaRaSoDa: LOL, whoops...mine's Nieves so you can drop the NnSaRaSoDa thing
ScRnBBaWl: thanks, so, I'm really sorry about your friend.
NnSaRaSoDa: I just feel so much guilt now. When I found him lying on the floor and found that his death note referred to me...it just stabbed me right in the stomach.
ScRnBBaWl: Wait, do you mean that you found Tim dead?
NnSaRaSoDa: Yep, it was definitely the most painful thing my big brown eyes ever saw. The worst part is, the vision won't stop replaying in my mind.
ScRnBBaWl: Maybe you should find an activity that you can pour all your energy into. I know that that's what football does for me. I can pretend the offense is my father, and the quarterback is my mother. It releases a lot of anger, and makes me one of the best guards in the state, and I also play Soccer, and baseball.
NnSaRaSoDa: My bud Kelley (we live together) suggests the same thing.
ScRnBBaWl: When you say "live together" you don't mean you're....
NnSaRaSoDa: LOL, no, VERY far from it. I've just been living on my own for a while and kel needed some place after her parents died, so she moved in.
ScRnBBaWl: If you've been living alone for awhile, how old does that make you?
NnSaRaSoDa: 15, my mom goofed up when I was young.
ScRnBBaWl: Wow, you've really been through a lot! But, I bet that makes you a really interesting person.
NnSaRaSoDa: Well, you better not be hitting on me, because my "sorta" boyfriend is living in Tulsa right now, and he's can get close enough to ring your neck.
ScRnBBaWl: Oh, I live in Tulsa too...but don't worry I was just being real.
NnSaRaSoDa: Good, I haven't just been "real" with a guy since Tim, so this feels good.
ScRnBBaWl: Well, I have to go meet a bud for a movie, so I better sign off. But, I really hope we can talk again sometime.
NnSaRaSoDa: Yeah that sounds good
ScRnBBaWl: Ok, bye Nieves
NnSaRaSoDa: Bye Justin
*******************************************************
Wara signed off soon after and walked into the center room to join Kelley.
"so, I was just talking to a total stranger on-line."
"Oh, really! He wasn't creepy right?" Kelley asked flipping the channel.
"Oh no not at all, it really felt good to talk to someone about Tim. Actually, he lives in Tulsa... Last time I checked, we had a couple of blond connections there!!" Wara said laughing, knowing it would get to Kelley.
"Don't remind me!! You're really setting my whole process back!"
"You've really got to diss this whole process, kel, it's getting kind of ridiculous."
"Well, you've got your process and I've got mine... Well, I better be getting to bed, tomorrow's the first read through of the lines for the play, and I'm planning on kicking ass! just another step in my PROCESS!!" She said standing up.
"Ok, goodnight you goober!"
"Goodnight!"
*******************************************************
"Ok, Kelley, and Kelly...umm I want you two to go over there and do scene 2."
The two walked to the center of the auditorium and transformed into their characters: Kelley as Beauty and Kelly as the beast. This was the scene where The Beast discovers that Beauty is living in his mansion. Just as Kelly walked into the scene with his scouring face, a "woohoo you go" Was heard from the crowd of actors, totally ruining the mood.
"Ashton, what is your problem? I do not care if you think Beauty and the Beast need to skip straight to the kissing scene, and "get it on" or whatever you young people are saying these days! This is a rehearsal and they are characters, not people for you to fantasize about. Maybe you need to learn that Mister!!" The Director screamed from behind his clipboard. After Ashton was dissed so badly, the two up on stage couldn't help but crack up. Getting back into the scene was pretty difficult, but they managed to do it, and the director said it was a "performance of outstanding emotion." Kelley just hoped she could keep that "emotion" up for tomorrow's try-outs.