'There are times it seems to me
I'm sharing you with memories
I feel it in my heart but I don't show it, show it
Then there's times you look at me
As though I'm all that you can see
Those times I don't believe it's right
I know it, know it'
I leaned forward, putting my head in my hands to clear my thoughts. I sat there for a minute, just thinking, before I got up to put the bowl back in the sink. Suddenly I wasn't hungry anymore. I went back to the couch, and sprawled across it, draping one leg over the armrest, and letting the other hang off the edge of the couch. I think best when I'm spread out in weird positions. Don't ask me to explain it.
Lately I'd been doing a lot of thinking about what I should do next. Some days Brian has acted as though he's been avoiding me. But then he was always bringing me gifts, like sending me flowers in the middle of the day for no reason, or coming home with a new CD I'd been wanting to buy. Now Brian's a sweet guy, don't get me wrong. But lately he'd been really generous. And then when I'd say thank you and give him a kiss, he'd sort of grin sheepishly and then turn on the TV. That wasn't like Brian at all. Usually he likes getting some extra attention when he does something nice for me. When he used to send me flowers, I'd hear about it for the next two weeks, and he'd always point to the vase of white roses sitting on the dining room table as an excuse for getting out of doing the dishes or vacuuming. Something was wrong. I knew it. I had known it for a while now. Things were different now. But why? What had happened? Obviously something with LeighAnne. That made the most sense. It couldn't be his work. The Boys were off for a few months. All they were doing was writing and recording. Brian loves doing that, so that couldn't be what was troubling him. It couldn't be his friends either. Unless he and Nick were having a fight. But they only seemed to have petty squabbles over video games. And they never stayed mad at each other for more than a day.
So it had to be LeighAnne. But how could I confront him about it? And if I did would he get angry? Probably. Would he tell the truth about what happened between them, if anything did happen? I hope so. Or maybe I don't. I don't know. But anything was better than this. Before I could think anymore, I heard the back door open. "Maggie? I'm home!"
'Judgement day.' I thought to myself as I got off the couch, determined to find out what was going on. I turned to face Brian. He was holding yet another bouquet of roses- the fourth one this week. I looked at the flowers as he held them out to me, then looked at him.
"Thanks, Bri," I said quietly as I took the flowers into the kitchen to put them in a vase.
"What's the matter?" he asked tentatively, as he followed me in the kitchen.
"Nothing, it's just that..." I took a deep breath, then turned back around to face him. "You've been awful generous lately, more than usual."
"Well, what's wrong with that? I love making you happy." He said, placing his arms around my shoulders and pulling me towards him. "I love you." He kissed the top of my head. I pulled away from him and then stated as carefully as possible,
"But it seems as though you're being overly generous, as if you're trying to make up for something or make yourself feel better about something." I trailed off, unable to continue when I saw his eyes cloud over.
"What are you saying, Maggie?"
"I'm saying I think something happened with LeighAnne and you're not telling me about it." There, I'd said it. Finally. "Brian, please tell me I'm wrong." I whispered as I reached up to touch his face. "Please." He turned away and stared out the window.
I felt myself grow cold all over. My throat went dry. I could've sworn my heart stopped beating. It was one thing to suspect that something had happened between Brian and LeighAnne. But now I knew for sure.
"Mags," Brian said quietly after what seemed like hours of still silence. "We need to talk."
* "All or Nothing" - O-Town
