If she looks at me one more time with those eyes of her’s I’m going to melt into the floor and disappear forever. Not that she would notice. She never noticed me.

I closed my eyes and leaned my head against the wall I was leaning against. Why did she have to torture me so much? Why did I have to want someone who would never see me as anything?

I was never going to be with her. “Why can’t you date someone like, I don’t know, Lyssa?” My best friend’s words echoed in his head. Nick was right. I shouldn’t dwell on something that will never happen, but I couldn’t help it. I was infatuated with the long blond hair and bright blue eyes.

It wasn’t even that Lyssa Bolden wasn’t a nice girl, or that she was ugly. She was far from it actually, but she was the exact opposite of her. Her hair was shoulder length and dark brown, and when she put it up a few strands fell into her face because her bangs weren’t the same length as the rest of her hair. When she smiled her dark green eyes lit up and sparkled. I loved the way that when I talked to her she always looked me directly in the eye so I know that she was listening to me. And when she ... wait a minute, why am I thinking about Lyssa? The woman of my dreams is right in front of me...

“Hey Brian!” I opened my eyes and saw Nick smiling at me. “You’re not enjoying the view?” He asked with that smirk on his face. I looked over to where Tara had been standing. She was still there but she wasn’t standing anymore. She was sitting in the make up chair and Lyssa was going to work on her.

“Which one?”

He cocked his head to one side, while watching the two girls and raised an eyebrow. “Good point.”

“You can stop staring at my ass now, Carter.” Lyssa said loudly as she dabbed the stage make up on Tara’s perfect skin. He laughed and walked over to her.

“But I like staring at it so much!” He said as she stood up and he dropped his arm around her shoulders.

“Ha! Yeah right! What would Miss Kay think about that?”

Tara looked up at Nick. She noticed him. She noticed him too much considering that one of her best friends was dating him and had been for about 6 months “Yeah, what would Kaylyn think about that?”

Lyssa became uncomfortable under Nick’s embrace and moved to grab some more make up. She was graceful and moved smoothly. She looked into the mirror that hung over the table that was covered with her make up supplies. “Hey Brian, you look lonely.” She said to my reflection in the mirror.

As I began to walk over to where the three of them were situated in front of the mirror I heard Nick say; “Yeah, he needs a woman!” I gave him a light smack on the back of the head as I reached them.

“A little. I mean my best friend spends a forth of his time onstage, a forth of his time sleeping, a forth of his time eating and the last forth of his time making out with his girlfriend.”

“I resent that. I don’t spend that much time eating!”

Tara laughed, and Lyssa just shook her head, she was thinking the same thing that I was: ‘How does Kaylyn put up with this?'

As if on cue the brunette who was almost permanently attached to Nick walked out of her dressing room. “Hey there cutie!” Nick grinned.

“Does that come with a barf bag?” Lyssa asked as she rolled her eyes and looked up at me for a second before going back to putting Tara’s make up on.

“Make that two, I think I’m gonna need one too.” Lyssa smiled and continued to put eye shadow on Tara.

“So are you all ready for the shoot?” Nick asked.

“I will be as soon as Lyssa is done with me.” Tara said in a snotty tone.

“Well, if you wouldn’t move around so much then maybe I would be able to get some work done.”

“Come on now, let’s just fix Tara’s face and get this thing started. Al is finishing up her outfit and since she’s already done with her make up we will be able to get started.” Kaylyn said from next to Nick.

“Fix my face? I don’t think-“

“I don’t think that we should talk about this anymore.” The photographer said, coming over from setting up his camera. “Come on now, hurry up. We’ve got a shoot to do and possibly a cover to shoot!”

He walked off and Lyssa put the final touches on Tara’s makeup. A moment later Alison walked out from wardrobe and Kaylyn pried herself from Nick’s grasp. Together they were the girls of Focus and they had been opening up for us for the last year. Lyssa had been doing their makeup and sometimes ours for about 8 months and she and Tara had never really gotten along.

As she walked by me, Tara gave me a kiss on the cheek, out of nowhere.

The girls walked over to the set where they were going to do the shoot and Lyssa sat down in the chair that Tara had been siting in only a moment before. Nick went to go find AJ, Kevin and Howie, leaving me to stand there by myself. I walked over to where I could watch the shoot.

“You like her a lot, don’t you?” A voice called from behind me. I turned around to find Lyssa watching me in the mirror.

“You could say that.” I said as I watched Tara’s tall figure walk to where the photographer was pointing, with a dazed look on my face.

“I thought so. She is very pretty.” She said before picking up some of the eye shadow that was lying on the table and starting to apply it to herself. It was strange. It was only then that I realized that I had never seen her wear makeup herself, even though it was the way that she made her living. She didn’t need it to cover any blemishes and she didn’t need stage makeup like we all did because she wasn’t in show business.

I was suddenly more interested in her doing her own make up then I was in the shoot. I had seen and been in thousands of those in the past years but I had never seen a woman do her own make up as carefully as she did. I walked over to where Nick had been standing when he had said hi to her earlier and watched her as she applied the eye shadow to the other eye.

“What are you doing?”

“Watching.”

“You don’t want to watch your goddess shoot her close-up?” Her voice was harsh and sarcastic. And for some reason it hurt. I walked back over to where I had been standing and began to watch again, my pride hurt somewhat. But I couldn’t focus on the girls in front of me. I was more interested in what Lyssa was doing. I forced myself to watch Tara as she argued with the other two girls over who was going to stand in front and the photographer over how many pictures he had taken of her.

It was then that I realized that when she had kissed me I had felt nothing. The dazed feeling was from not expecting anything like that to happen. But I hadn’t felt anything other than shock. It meant nothing to me. Ten minutes later I couldn’t stand it anymore. I had to see what Lyssa looked like; I couldn’t get her out of my head. I turned around and couldn’t believe what I saw. The only make up she had on was what she always wore, lip-gloss and glitter, but she was beautiful anyway. She looked up from cleaning her brushes and caught me staring at her.

“What?” She asked, her hair falling into her face. I turned all the way around and watched her move around the small area for a moment before walking over to her and placing my hands on her arms to keep her from moving anymore. She looked up at me with those eyes of hers. “What?” She whispered.

“You’re beautiful.” I said quietly, not wanting to scare her.

She looked at me again and her green eyes flashed. “I’m not Tara, Brian. You can’t win me over by telling me I’m pretty. I’m not that shallow.” She pushed me away and went back to cleaning up the area she had been working in.

I pushed away from him. I couldn’t let him know how I felt about him now, after all this time. He couldn’t possibly like me, not compared to Tara’s blond hair, blue eyes and her bra size. There was on way that he could start liking me, not now.

But a small part of me couldn’t help but hope that maybe he saw past all of that and could see what she really was; a girl with her ambitions and a hunger for what she knows she could never have. That’s why she was so fascinated with Nick. He was with Kaylyn, but that didn’t stop Tara from trying to get him.

It was that small bit of hope that caused the tears to slide from my eyes and down my cheeks. But I just bent my head further, causing my hair to go in my face and hide the fact that just him standing there was having an effect on me.

I watched her lower her head as her dark hair fall into her face, and a second later a tear hit the counter she was leaning over. She was crying. I took a deep breath and walked up behind her, placing my hands on her shoulders. I leaned down and whispered in her ear. “You’re beautiful. In every way.” She shivered and stopped what she was doing. I knew I had her attention when she lifted up her head and looked at me in the mirror again. “I know that Tara is pretty. But you are beautiful, because you aren’t only pretty, but you are a sweet girl.”

“Bria-” I cut her off.

“Let me finish. I was standing over by the wall before you came in to do Tara’s make up. And I was thinking about all the things that I liked about her. I only came up with two. Blond hair and blue eyes. Then something that Nick said popped into my head. ‘Why can’t you like a nice girl like Lyssa?’ He asked me once. Then I started thinking of all the things I loved about you. The way you smile at me. You always look me in the eye when I talk to you, so I know you are listening. The way you hair falls in your face, and when you put it up there are still strands that escape. And your eyes...”

“Brian-“

“When she kissed me on the cheek it meant nothing to me. That made me realize that although there things that I like about Tara. There are so many more things that I love about you.” I turned her around so that she was facing me and pushed the hair out of her eyes. She looked up at me with wide eyes. I only smiled a little and leaned down towards her.

“Brian... what are you doing?” She whispered.

“Lyssa... I’m going to kiss you.”

“OK.” It was all she said before our lips met. It was the opposite of what I had felt when Tara had kissed me. This felt right. And it only felt more so when she put her arms around my neck right before she pulled away. “Brian, what are we doing?”

“Falling in love. At least that’s what I’m doing.”

“Do you mean that?” She asked as another tear slid down her face, leaving a slight trail of glitter behind.

I wiped the tear away with my thumb and looked her directly in the eye, our foreheads touching. “Of course I do.”

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