****
Justin turned his sleek sports car into the front entrance of Sam’s apartment complex. The two friends sat in silence as they drove past the identical, brick, colonial-style buildings lining the narrow streets. Justin continued slowly to the last structure in the far-right corner overlooking the pool in which Sam and Jen shared a second floor apartment. The radio played lowly over the car’s top-notch stereo system as he searched for a parking space in the adjacent lot, and the DJ’s voice caught his attention.
“Alright, that was Pink’s latest hit. She’s one feisty chick, isn’t she?” he laughed as Sam rolled her eyes. “I need to take a quick break but after that I’ll have *NSYNC’s recent number once smash for ya. Oh wait! Speaking of *NSYNC, I almost forgot,” the man said excitedly as the sound of rustling papers floated through the airwaves. “I mentioned earlier that I had found some spicy internet gossip for you guys. Aww man, what’d I do with it?” the on-air personality whined while continuing to search for the information he needed.
Sam wondered what ridiculous story the media would be spreading this time as natural curiosity made Justin turn the volume up.
“Yeah! Here it is!” the DJ proclaimed triumphantly. “Okay, so here’s the scoop. This all originated on a fan website for *NSYNC. Now the webmaster of that site, and before you even ask, no, I’m not going to give you the address because that would be free promotion and we don’t believe in that at this station,” he cracked. “So anyway, this girl works as a night desk clerk at a no-tell motel in Port Charlotte and according to her, Justin checked in rather late last night with a woman who this girl described as a busty brunette.”
“Damnit, I thought that girl recognized me,” Justin muttered shaking his head as the DJ continued.
“Now I know what you’re probably thinking – Britney in a wig. WRONG! Ashley, the desk clerk/webmaster, is apparently a devoted fan possibly bordering a little on the stalker side of the tracks if you ask me,” he chuckled again. “Well according to Ashley, she doesn’t know this woman’s name but apparently she travels with the *NSYNC guys quite a bit and is probably a member of their crew.”
“Well that’s just fucking great,” Sam said breaking the silence she’d maintained for the nearly three hour trip home.
“Nobody will know they’re talking about you,” Justin tried to reassure her but to no avail.
“The only person I care about hearing it will,” she hissed at him as the DJ continued to babble on.
“So now I bet you’re all thinking, so what? They were probably just working. Right?” the man questioned his listeners. “Well wrong again kiddies! It seems that even though there were plenty of rooms available, Justin only requested one. And did I mention that it had a king-sized bed just perfect for secret lovin’?” the man laughed obnoxiously once again. “Hmm, maybe Justin and Britney are just friends after all. At least for Britney’s sake I hope that’s all they are. “It’s Gonna Be Me” is up next,” he said before finally breaking for commercials.
Justin’s head and shoulders sunk as Sam stared at him in disbelief.
“Is that true Justin? What he said about the rooms?”
“Yes, but I didn’t do it for the reasons you think I did. I didn’t want you to be alone. That was it. Honestly,” he explained.
“If that were so true then why didn’t you just tell me that?” Sam demanded. “Or at the very least you could’ve gotten a room with double beds for Christ’s sake.”
“I tried but they didn’t have any available.”
“Yeah I’ve heard that story before,” she scoffed reaching for the door handle.
Justin sighed, slumping his head against the back of his seat as Sam opened the door and set her feet out. “Wait,” he said grabbing her arm as she stood awkwardly, partially out of the car. “I’m sorry.”
Sam could hear the sincerity in his voice so she didn’t resist when he guided her back into the seat. But as she turned her head and met the gaze of those deep blue eyes that she thought would never hurt her, she couldn’t help remembering how just hours earlier those same eyes had told her that what she felt for Lance was basically nothing more than a silly, schoolgirl crush.
“Sorry for what Justin?” she snapped. “Sorry that I heard you?” Sorry that I didn’t fall into your arms and let you have your way with me right then and there?” Sam paused very briefly only to take a gasp of air before continuing her frantic questions. “Or maybe you’re sorry for lying and scheming in order to share a bed with me? Or perhaps you’re sorry for my personal favorite – telling me that I don’t know my own feelings from a hole in my ass? Come on, tell me! I’m dying to know,” she finished sarcastically.
“I’m sorry that I upset you. The last thing I ever meant to do was hurt you,” the young man answered simply and solemnly as he stared at his hands resting on the steering wheel.
Once again Sam’s pain blocked out any apology Justin could offer. “Well, you know what? I’m sorry too. I’m sorry for thinking that I could count on you to be there when I needed a friend. I’m sorry that I trusted you with some of the most intimate details of my life only to have you throw them back in my face after you’ve twisted them into what you perceive to be reality. But do you know what I’m the most sorry for?” she asked without waiting for a reply. “I’m sorry that you can’t see that I do love you Justin, but that I’m IN love with Lance. And I’m sorry that my friendship isn’t enough for you.”
“Whatever,” he mumbled bitterly. His pride would only let him take so many stabs before striking back and he’d reached his breaking point. “I hope you enjoy your time with Lance in denial.”
“What choice do I have? There’s no room for me in the real world with you and your ego,” Sam shot back before quickly exiting, slamming the car door behind her.
Justin sped away as she stormed into the door of the building. The anger Sam was feeling quickly lead to tears as she made her way up the stairs. She knew deep down in her heart that he meant what he said about not wanting to hurt her, but she resented more than anything the fact that he made her question her feelings. And to her own surprise, and sorrow, she found herself wondering if his words possibly held some truth.
“I just need to be alone right now, time to think, clear my head,” she said aloud wiping the tears from her face. She had no idea what was awaiting her inside the small apartment as she turned the handle to the door.
****
Lance sat in the darkness of Sam’s room in the white plastic lawn chair she jokingly referred to as the cornerstone of her designer bedroom suite. Sam had explained to him that not too long after she’d moved in she wanted to buy a chair so she could sit and look out the window but the only thing she could afford at the time was the cheap patio furniture. After she had started working for him and her budget was a little bit more flexible she decided against replacing it, telling him that it held too much sentimental value. He loved that side of her, the part that made her save ticket stubs from movies they’d attended, receipts from dinners they’d eaten, anything and everything she could possibly save, she did. Glancing over at the stack of empty luggage on the other side of the room he realized that’s probably why she came home with twice as many suitcases than she left with.
All night long his mind would drift off to random memories that helped to momentarily distract him but also make his heart ache even more. He loved her so much. He couldn’t lose her. As he sat there staring at the empty bags he recalled another of those memories that had taken place a couple of weeks earlier in Boston.
*****
The five men were being ushered through the hotel lobby quickly by their security team. The crowd was larger than usual and the group was running late for sound check. Sam walked briskly next to Lance as she watched the disappointed looks on the fans’ faces as they realized their idols wouldn’t be stopping to greet them. As they were almost near the doors, a young girl caught Sam’s eye. She couldn’t have been more than five and she had big alligator tears streaming from her wide brown eyes. A woman that Sam assumed was her mother swept a soothing hand over the young girl’s dark chocolate hair. Sam’s pace slowed as she continued to watch the child.
“Sam?” Lance asked, as she had now completely stopped.
“Uh, I’ll catch up to you at the venue in a little while okay?” she said half-distracted. Lance looked confused. “I’m fine. I’ll see you there,” she reassured.
He was being pushed along by his security so he didn’t have time to get further explanation but he trusted her word and kept going, watching for as long as he could. As Lance sat on his bus waiting for the police officers to clear the blocking traffic he saw his girlfriend walk up to the little girl’s mother and pull her off to the side away from the crowd. They exchanged a few words before Sam crouched down to talk to the tot. That’s all he could witness first hand before his luxury coach pulled away.
“Hi, my name is Samantha. What’s yours?”
The child looked up at her mother before answering. The woman nodded and placed her hands on her daughter’s shoulders. “Amanda,” she answered sniffling.
“It’s nice to meet you Amanda,” Sam smiled warmly at her. “I was telling your mom that I felt so bad when I saw how upset you were. I hear you’re a big *NSYNC fan and you were hoping to meet them today.”
“Yeah, but mommy says they’re too busy. I saw you walking with them. Do you know them?” the young girl asked inquisitively.
“Yes I do actually. I work for Lance. I’m his personal assistant. I take care of the things that he doesn’t have time to do himself. And your mom was right, they are very busy today. So Amanda, I hear you don’t have tickets to the show tonight either. Is that right?”
“No, but I really wanted to go. I know all the words to “Bye Bye Bye”.
“Me too. I love that song,” Sam said as the girl giggled. “Amanda I have some extra tickets and passes to meet the guys for tonight’s concert. Do you think that you and your mom might want to use them?”
“Really?” she said excitedly as she bounced about.
“Absolutely, but you have to keep it our secret okay? I don’t have enough to give to everybody.”
“I will. I promise!” the child exclaimed before wrapping Sam in a tight hug.
“My pleasure sweetie,” she said squeezing back.
“Thank you so much. You probably have no idea how much this means to my daughter,” her mother said as she struggled to keep a grip on the ecstatic child.
“I know exactly how she feels,” Sam smiled at the woman. “I’m still a fan. I have to go Amanda. Have fun tonight.”
“Samantha can I ask you something?” she said timidly.
“Anything you want.”
“Lance is my favorite and you said that you worked for him right?”
“That’s right,” Sam confirmed.
“Do you know if he has a girlfriend?”
“If he did, a girl as pretty as you could definitely steal him away,” Sam winked at her before turning to go.
*****
Lance understood Sam’s reason for staying behind when he recognized the young girl and her mother at the meet and greet later that day. Even if he hadn’t, both Amanda and her mother had made sure Lance knew what a wonderful woman it was he had by his side. Not that he needed anyone to tell him that. He knew he loved her at that point, and he was pretty sure Sam felt the same, even though they hadn’t said the words yet. But after seeing what she did for the young fan, Lance knew it wasn’t just another ordinary relationship. Even though they’d only been together for a couple of weeks, he found himself thinking that she just may be the one.
‘God, where is she?’ he thought to himself as the radio played through the speaker of her alarm. It had gone off earlier in the morning just as he had expected it to. He knew Sam had a habit of re-setting it directly after she woke up so she didn’t forget to do so at night. It was just another of her idiosyncrasies that he loved. But what didn’t he love about her? At the moment he couldn’t think of anything, although he was sure there were a few annoying habits he could live without. Lance knew there was most certainly more of her to discover, after all they’d only been a couple for a month and he’d only known her for three.
“Three months, I can’t believe how much she’s changed my life in three months,” he said under the soft music playing through the clock radio. The only time Lance had regretted not shutting it off was minutes earlier when the afternoon DJ gave him the basics of her evening with Justin. His stomach turned just thinking about that again. He was trying his best not to believe the one-room story until he heard it from Sam first hand. He prayed that she was on his way home to work things out between the two of them and not doing what the DJ had suggested with Justin.
****
“How’d you get here?” Jen asked the tall brunette woman sitting on the countertop as she and JC stood in the kitchen.
“I made Joey bring me over as soon as I could get his sleepy butt out of bed,” Mel answered. “What are you doing here?”
“Um, I live here remember?”
“I know that, but aren’t you supposed to be working?”
“I’m on my lunch break and for whatever reason JC was at Johnny’s, or excuse me, the compound," she said making quotation marks in the air mockingly. "So I decided to make him my chauffeur and check up on things,” Jen explained.
“Hmm JC, I wonder why you were at the compound,” Mel teased.
“Hey! I have things to do there,” JC insisted before breaking into a boyish grin. “Not really today, but whatever.”
His girlfriend smiled and shook her head slightly as she spoke again. “So is Lance still in there?” she asked pointing to Sam’s room. “And do I hear a radio?”
“Yes, he’s still in there and yes, you hear a radio. He came rushing out when I walked in and I’ve never seen somebody so disappointed to see me,” Mel joked. “I asked if he wanted to talk but he said no and just shut himself in the room again. He’s been in there ever since.”
“Have you heard from Sam or Justin?” JC asked her.
“No, not a word. I don’t even wanna think about what could be going on in that hotel.”
“Shh! Lance doesn’t need to hear stuff like that!” Jen exclaimed.
“He can’t hear me, he’s got the radio on. Besides I’m sure it’s not anything he hasn’t already thought about himself,” the woman reminded her friend as the front door opened.
Sam walked in, startled to see so many people there to greet her. She looked ragged. Her light brown hair was tousled and laying flatly at her shoulders. Her white cotton shirt was wrinkled and buttoned unevenly. Her tired, brown eyes couldn’t hide the fresh tears or the ones she’d cried all night long. Looking at her, Mel and Jen knew she didn’t need an interrogation.
“Sami are you okay?” Jen asked softly, her hazel eyes showing great concern for her friend.
“No,” the petite brunette replied, her voice cracking as tears stained her cheeks once again. “I can’t believe how stupid I was.”
“Come and sit down and tell me what happened,” Mel said hopping off the counter, quickly walking to Sam’s side.
“I’ll make myself scarce so you ladies can talk,” JC offered turning for the door.
“No, you don’t have to. I just want to be alone,” Sam said shaking off Mel’s embrace before escaping to her room.
“Maybe we should’ve told her that Lance was in there?” Jen asked with a shrug of her shoulders.
Mel sighed as JC spoke. “Maybe we should all leave and give them some privacy.”
“Oh no, if those two are gonna go at it again then I’m gonna be here afterwards to kick his ass,” Mel asserted. “Or hers if need be.”