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Today's Energizer: "It's Not Me Nice"

from America's non-profit Nursing Recruiting and Services Agency
The Career Institute -- Employment by Nurses for Nurses!

A National Magazine for Nursing Management, Staff Nurses, Pracitoners & Hospital Dept. Heads
Publishers: Nursing JobScout Non-Profit Recruiters and Community Resource Foundation, Inc.
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Don't believe what the "bad guys" say about you!		Yup. I know. You get up in the morning, determined to put a good face on things, to make today a new day, to not let them get to you, to smile no matter what, to never let them see you sweat, to turn over a new leaf, to consider the source, and to let the bozoheads' mean-spirited attacks just run off you like water off a duck's back. So, you go to the hospital and, within five minutes, an irrate physician nabs you and compalins bitterly about some offense on the night shift that's "all your fault." Ten minutes later, a very-agitated night nurse corners you to dump about how the doctor "always takes it out on us." Retreating to the safety of your office (after all you are the unit director!), you spot the Chief Nursing Officer striding toward your door. You both reach it at the same time. She's got fire in her eye because the CEO just yelled at her to "fix" a turf war over catheter kit requisitions that has erupted between your unit clerk and Central Supply. And, she wants you to fix it this very second! So much for the cheery attitude you started out with. Now, your stomach feels as if you've swallowed two jalapenio peppers whole ... your fists are clenched ... your face has become one big worry wrinkle ... your lips are pursed so tight that they're hardly visible ...and your head couldn't throb any more than it does if someone had literally hit you with the blunt end of an IV stand. And, it's not 8:00am yet. You're only 38 and are increasingly alarmed that you'll never survive to retirement.... I can't tell you how to change your entire world in this little article. But, I can give you a tool to use that will help immensely, if you practice it. Here it is: See them for who they are. They are them. They are not you! Every time people come up to you and blast away, quickly speak to yourself, saying things like: "They and their situation are the problem. I am not the problem, even though they're accusing me of being stupid (incompetent, lazy, blind, unprofessional, dishonest, a real disappointment, etc.)." "They're trying to give me the problem -- or make me the problem -- but it remains their problem!" "Okay, it's my responsibility to help correct the problem. But I am not the problem itself! "They're being mean to me but I don't deserve it! I'm a good person and, to prove it, I'll start working on the problem and try to correct it. But I am not the problem!" "They want to make me the problem, but I'm too healthy to buy that nonsense. I am not the problem! I am a resource to help fix the problem!" "This is now a difficult new item on my agenda, but it is not me!" "I probably can't even fix this mess myself. I'll call a meeting or assemble a team to enlist others' assistance, I'll do coaching and counseling, bring in the CNO, HR, etc. I am a good person. And, because I am good, I'm going to get to work trying to fix this mess." "The mess is out there! I am not the mess! I am not a mess!" Even if you caused the difficulty by some action of your own, or because you failed to take some action, that was the "old" you, the "you of yesterday." You are not "bad" or "naughty," or "incompetent" at all! The "you" of yesterday is gone. And, the "you of today" is a sweet, dedicated, professional who will now work diligently to correct the problem. That's what they pay you for, after all. But, (say this over and over and over to yourself)"I am not the problem. I am not a problem! The problem is out there and I will help fix it...!" Try this. It takes work, this repeating the "reality check" over and over again inside your head. But, do it, anyway. It will help change your life for the better!

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