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::have you ever wondered if some things happen for a reason, by, somebody else? i might sound crazy, but i mean, have you ACTUALLY sat down and thought "alright, somebody out there is helping me out with this" sometimes or "alright they obviously gave me the chance to do THIS for a reason..." i mean.. yeahhh, i might sound crazy, but its the way i see it. there's no way all these things can be happening to certain people, just "cause". i think i just realized i truly believe in destiny... weird. so why am i sitting HERE right now talkin about nothing? well i'm waiting to go out, in about an hour, and i had nothing to do. but tomorrow will be a big day in a small section of my life. i wont explain why, but it just seems to be a turning point and testing point for a new subject that i hold very close to my thoughts... all close friends will know it but some wont... I mean,it's just gonna be a day like any other, but the fact that i'm waiting for one thing to happen, and to wish i could look into the future about it, makes the day so much different. makes the day interesting.. Is somebody out there right now thinking "alright kim, but what you DONT know is..." and i'm about to find it out tomorrow?? that's kinda.. creepy.. but i believe there's SOMETHIN goin on out theeeere!! but if it wasnt a good thing to happen, why did it start like it did?? maybe to teach me a lesson.. maybe it'll turn out horribly and teach me a lesson... i know nothing! maybe someone does.
::have you ever sat and wondered how many people are thinking about you at this moment, too? just think about it.. even if it's just for a second? your parents, your siblings, your crush... what if he/she IS? what if some guy/girl you dont realize is even ALIVE, is sitting at home right now thinking about how wonderful you are, and working up the guts to talk to YOU. what if somebody you miss dearly, is right now, missing you dearly too?? think about it- cause you just thought of them too. ::have you ever wondered how much you DONT know about somebody? you can always get to know somebody.. but you never know EVERYTHING. face it, even if they're your best friend in the whole world, you know their present, past, maybe can even see some of their future ahead of them... you dont know everything. ::ever thought of how weird it is that there is only one YOU? there's [unless you're a twin] only ONE person in the WORLd that has YOUR face, YOUR body, YOUR personality. doesnt it bother you sometimes that, maybe somebody you really wanna meet, doesnt even know that somebody that LOOKS like 'THAT' even EXISTS?? think about it... before you saw any picture of me, or saw me in real life, you had no idea there was anybody out there that looked like kim pearson. there ya go now. ::have you ever wondered how much better it can make someone's day, just if you smile at them? You never know, they might be thinking about you right now.. and wishing for that smile tomorrow..... ::"you always want what you cant have and dont want what you can" - geeez WHY does this quote seem to be SOoo true?! and just like Rachel said before, why does it seem sometimes that songs are written JUST for you..?? I mean it's good- shows for sure that you're not the only one in the world with these thoughts and feelings.. I know just SONGS that have helped a lot of my friends through things.. there's SOo many songs that could point out what i'm thinkin right NOW! ha. "Ooh i want you- i dont know if i need you but ooh i'm dieing to find out" ... Hmm... damn true. For once i just want something to happen.. and THEN Find out if it's wrong... ::what also makes me wonder.. have ya ever wondered why certain things happen to certain people?? just like.. we have our tyler page. now- ANY huge fan of Josh Chasez would DIE to have the Chasez family write them. Instead, we have OUR page, and WE hardly even LIKE Nsync... although, WE get the chance to talk to them and chat, and call them some of our adult "friends"? Alot of times when people write us about our page about that stuff.. really makes me feel bad, just cause... i mean, we dont deserve this! someone else who would die for it should get this instead.. sorry, just a thought! although we're 100% thankful for everything we got.. ::hmm, ever thought of what people might become when they're older?? well basically, what i mean- have ya ever sat down and thought of what would happen if, lets say the GUY or.. girl... Youre in LOVE with right now, who doesnt realize youre alive or something, what if THEY, in 20 years are pop stars, or world wide actors, and you get to look back at all your old yearbooks saying "see? here! there's a heart over his picture.. look how cute he was! he was my biggest crush!" and here they are a huge star?? i just happen to think that is.. very cool. ;) like, the little girls that went out with the backstreet boys, or whoever voted my KEVIN for "best looking guy of the school" back then, awwww!! and NOW they think back at how cute he was and...?? AWwwWw! cant wait to see who from MY school becomes extremely successful... ::ever get the urge to sit and write every single little thing thats on your mind, but when you get down to it... there's really nothing? Well yeah... ::sorry i was just told what brian's saying in the background near the end of "back to your heart" and.. i am like CONVULSING! this is toooooo cute! My frikkin GOD, KEVIN, you are TOO frikkin perfect!! look look, in the end, i always thought they were just repeating the chorus or saying like "aww aww aww" or SOMETHIN but noooo they're saying: "These arms of mine, are open wide. From now until the end of time. You are my world, what can I do. This heart of mine belongs to you" AWWWWWwwwwWW!!!! what a perfect song. ::also, have ya ever wondered what it'd be like to be someone else? I mean of course you HAVE, everyone has. but have you actually really sat down once and realized "wow, they really are ... a PERSON, they really are THINKING right now, seeing through their own eyes, thinking their own internal thoughts".. I might sound crazy, but really, think about it more than usual! its weird!! what i would give to just... SWITCH for a day... ::you know what seriously scares me, more than anything else on this earth? common thing. death. really, its gotta scare everyone, but if you actually stopped for a second and thought about, i mean i know some of you might get mad at me but, [i do believe there IS too, i'm just SAYING here, what IF] there IS no other place after THIS life?? really... all we've EVER known, is just gone. sure i can just think about that and be like "oh well" but then if you think deeper... you wont even be THINKING "oh well".. we've never KNOWN anything other, like... the... OH MY God.. it just scares me too much to even WRITE about.. think about it, life means youre HERE, youre thinking, even if you shut your eyes, youre thinking. sometimes when we think of being dead or something, we think "hey well we'll just be thinking in darkness" Or SOMETHING weird like that, but really... there IS no us, there IS no... no more... GOD i cant.. forget it, i'll just stop. just had to get that out. what else kinda scares me though if i think about it? sleeping!! haha. no really! if ya THINK about it before you sleep, what youre about to DO, its kinda disturbing! if you actually realize that youre about to shut yourself down and be completely unaware of the world, and dissapear for almost 12 hours.... wow... although lately? i must admit, just even though it sounds REALLY REALLY weird? ever since i watched some dumb movie on NSYNC?!! i've been able to stop those thoughts for some reason all the time by saying to myself "yeah but Josh really LOVES sleeping. i should be lucky i'm GETTING to shut down for a bit" then i fall asleep... ::i just realized if there's one thing in the WORLD I HATE- its when people take something you say and turn it into something else. when they turn it into something you didnt mean to say or didnt even think of, then get mad at you for it. i hate that. just so ya know. ::and kevin is a perfect angel. |
