Nick,
There has been so much that I have always wanted to say to you. I just hope you take the time to read this cause I have taken the time to write it from my heart
I have always wanted to tell you how much you mean to me. But I never could. If not enough words or expressions how. But I never got the chance. And I know you don't know who I am so I will introduce myself. My name is Angela Seeley. I live in Orlando well near Orlando Florida. I have lived in Florida all my life. My friends call me Angel. They say cause I'm so sweet. But I don't think I am. I hope Howie doesn't mind that I write you. I didn't get your address from Howie I got it from a friend. I just hope that she doesn't or you don't mind either. I just wanted to let you know how much you mean to me.
I don't have a story like Tiffany did which I sent to AJ but I do have what my heart wants me to tell you. I hope you don't mind.
A year ago I met one of my guy best friends. He was really nice to me and looked a lot like you. We were great friends and spent so much time together. Well I started to like him. When I finally gained up the nerve to ask him out my female bestfriend already did. She knew how much i liked him and all. but she didn't care. She already got to him. It hurt so bad. That the months that they were going out I came home and cried. When I cried I turned on my radio cause I always love to listen to music. And when I turned on that radio it was your voice that touched me. From All I have To Give you sang "I don't know what he does to make you cry but I'll be there to make you smile, i don't have a fancy car to get to you I'd walk a thousand Miles" Those words hit me hard. I liked you ever since my friends started to talk about you and when I saw your smiling face on MTV Live on your Birthday but that made me love and respect you so much more. I got through those months with your help. And when I started loving you more he came and tried to see if I still liked him. And when he did I couldn't help it but i fell for him again. I dont' know why. And then around Christmas time he started going out with another one of my best friends. I came home and there you were again. You were there. Arms to cry into and to help me through it. even though you were not there physically but you were there with me. IN my heart. The love I had for you kept me with you for so long. And helped me through these times when this guy kept playing me.
Well me and him became friends again. He started calling me everyday and started saying bad things about his girlfriend and everything. Well other best friend started to like him. She was starting to be like me. I stood by that whole time when I could of asked him out. And I didn't cause I didn't want to hurt her. When me and him got in a huge fight on my birthday and we didn't talk. He started talking to her and giving her hope just like he did to me. But none the less did we both know is that he already had a girlfriend.
I promised myself that I would not let him hurt me again. And so far he hasn't.
Ever since I was a little girl. I have always dreamt about the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. He had a wonderful personality. A sweet smile that could make any troubles I have ever had dissapear. He also had that one thing that I always wanted. Love in his heart. He would love me for me and I would love him for him. I have started acting school and I have been on TV at my high school and I don't want to be just known for that. I want to be known for me. And if my boyfriend or anyone ever just cared about me because of that that would really hurt me.
One day I came home from school. I think it was a wednesday. I turned on the TV and just started watching it. I fliped to a station. It was MTV. I saw these five guys singing. The camera skimed through the guys and as I heard the beautiful song that was music to my ears I saw him. I saw the man of my dreams. Not knowing anything about him. When I looked in his eyes I saw something. Not only happyness for doing what he loves but something else. Something that I always wanted to see. I saw love. I saw him. I saw him for him. I didn't know anything about him but I was ready to find out what he was all about. I found out who the group was. I searched and I also remember hearing my friends talk about him before I even saw him. I remember that. I remember reading things about his personality and the things he has liked to do. And I also watched the tv to find out how he acted. He did everything that I loved. The way he smiled the way his blue eyes shined and most importantly the way he acted. I fell hard for him. And his name is Nick Carter.
From that day forward I knew why God put me on this earth. Not only to make people happy by using the two gifts he has given me. My love to act and my love for love. But he also put me on this earth to make that person happy. No matter how I do it I'm supposed to make him happy. By supporting him and loving him to finally meeting him and making him smile. I don't care what I have to do I just hope that he is happy. I think God everyday that you are in my life Nick. I think God everyday that he has given me the chance to love you. Your one of the greatest things in my life and I am not ashamed to say that I love you. Not for what you are and not for what you do. But you. I look into your eyes and I see you. Your smile can say alot.
Nick I know I probally just sound like another fan. But I don't want to be. I want to be someone who you can talk to and confide in. I want to be someone who can make you laugh when your down, and make sure that smile never fades from your face. Nick no matter how much I want to be with you and no matter how much I want to hold you in my arms and tell you I love you, I would give all that up just so you could be happy. All I want is that smile to stay on your face. And who ever can keep that smile on your face has all my support and love. Anyone who can make your smile stay deserves the world. Because you deserve the world and more. I love you Nick. Please don't forget that. I'll always be here for you whenever you need me. I wish you the best in luck in whatever you get. Cause if you want it bad enough God will let you have it. I love you!
Angela Seeley
P.S. I love you!
