Hello. My name is Lara Kensington Croft. I have been many things in my short life, but my favorite is Treasure Hunter. Little did I know that my hobby would be put on hold to serve my country, England. Bringing me to the shores of America, in pursuit of one of the most devious of terrorists I have ever known, The Black Claw.
But that's another tale, and I am getting ahead of myself. I left my guide Tanadoori several kilometers back at the Rangoon border, he fearing the wrath of what he called "Nagas" I believe he called it. I have read some, so I just know there will be some sort of serpent involved. I was thinking how I could bloody hang Nate, my supplier and friend, for telling me of the Golden Elephant in the first place.
Prophetic speech. I hate bloody snakes.
Nate Firefox you bugger, there really is a ruined temple in these blasted mountains. Well, looks like I'll need my torch.
You ever notice that treasure is never found out in the bleeding daylight?
Hmmm. A flat with a skylight. There's my bauble.
Odd. Quiet...no birds, no bugs, no reason to keep talking to myself either.
Ughhh. What the bloody hell is that awful smell?!? Friggin' stagnant pool.
Hmm. No worries. BLAST! Dropped my friggin torch. Nate'll have his knickers in a bunch. Knew I should have used a flare. What was that....?!?
SHAG ME! I HATE FRIGGIN' SNAKES!!!!!!! Can't shoot and carry, gonna' have to Peter Pan it..Ughhhh.
Ughhh. Get up girl.....The things I do for kicks. Better to be On the Job with Sting.
If I get out of this alive I'm sticking to football.
What the..? NATE? WHAT THE HELLLLL?
Nate: LEGS! HIT THE GROUND!!
Bugger! Thanks Nate. Wanna help a girl up? What are you DOING here anyway?
Nate: HQ sent me, seems HRH and HQ have a job for you. I have the file, and some new toys.
Where's the job?
Nate: You'll love this, you're going to America.
Like it? Beauty isn't it?
Nate: Nah, I prefer something with breasts. Better to see these in the Bronz Zoo.
Here..hold this for me. So tell me more about this job in the States. NIIICCCCEEE. Where you get the 'Beetle-Bopper'?
Nate: Boot-Sale'd some of your fine heirlooms for it, but they took a pair of your knickers in trade.
Bugger.
Nate: There's a file from HQ. Seems some bird from China has been a very naughty girl. International terrorism, biochemical assasination, she's wanted by several countries and INTERPOL has a sheet on her long enough to wipe with.
So where do I fit in? I'm a bloody Indiana Joan, not Emma Peel.
Nate: You were picked because you have a great nose for finding things. You can get into places that are shall we say, "retentive"? Intel says she is after something that is to be used on us here. There's a pic. She goes by the name: The Black Claw.
Sounds like a bleeding "Beat-Me" tart in the Circus. Looks a bit like Ming-Na Wen. What's this valise? Heavy.
Nate: You'll love it. Something a bloke named Eight-Bit made to find deep cover operatives. Seems our little China doll's been microchipped.
Yeah, just like my pooch.
Nate: Well, that's the job Legs. I flicked the tracing program on. Seems she's already on the move. HQ says that we have a bloke over there you can touch base with, if you're in dutch. Goes by the name of Big Ben. Works for some covert team in a hidden base. Might be on a mission, so I wouldn't rely on him too much.
Big Ben (rolls eyes..) What ever happened to real names? Like John Steed, Super Ted, Danger Mouse...
Nate: Just be careful Legs..this bird can have your arse in worse shape than John in the Tower.
Don't worry Nate. (picks up pistols..) You know I'm a very careful girl.
SCENES FROM PART TWO