Lifesweep

I sang, but it was not from my heart;

and laughed without happiness;

I cried, but it was mostly for myself;

I danced, but it was always to the tune of others;

I followed the Pied Piper,

because I had no path of my own;

My slumber was filled with terror,

an unnatural sleep brought about by

any means devised by man;

My only escape was into madness -

a world where I could live my fantasies,

and avoid the realities of life;

Like a sleepwalker,

I neither saw you nor heard you,

you were not real.

The friends I made along the Way

were there to entertain me,

there was no sharing or deep need -

just the absolutely necessity of having them.

The light that was in my soul, I

sought to extinquish; yet the spark

persistentently followed me, and

finally forced me to yield to it.

The message was, "lift your eyes,

bear your soul, there is good there"

All the mysteries of life, once faced,

can dispel the fears and doubts of yesterday;

turning today into a blissful promise for tomorrow.

The spark I began with,

I have come to know, is Divine;

It's power has lifted me from human bondage;

And set free my thoughts, my spirit,

my God-given potential;

I know that it is without limit;

And so I begin again at my beginnings,

and step by step retrace a journey filled

with pain and fear and improprieties;

To finally arrive at one simple conclusion:

That by Grace I am saved, and freed

from a lifetime of ego-invested  waunderings;

Now I sing and dance to a newer note;

I may hear a different drummer than you,

and yet I can march along with you now

and be at one with you - for the voice I

shunned has become the sound I listen for daily -

It has put on a new cloak and a new face,

And yet it is not new - it is as old as Time itself;

It is God within me.

BJ McCall

1982

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