This review is dedicated to the memories of Owen Hart, Robert "Gorilla Monsoon" Marella, Rodney "Yokozuna" Anoai, Scott "Bam Bam" Bigelow, Randal "Randy Savage" Poffo, William "Paul Bearer" Moody, Harry "Mr. Fuji" Fujiwara, Jim "The Anvil" Neidhart and Christopher John "King Kong Bundy" Pallies. R.I.P.
Special thanks to The History of WWE for dates and places.
Your host is "The Million Dollar Man" Ted DiBiase, who originally introduced the world to the Undertaker at Survivor Series 90.
Opening Match: The Undertaker (w/Paul Bearer) vs. The Underfaker (w/"The Million Dollar Man" Ted DiBiase), WWE SummerSlam 94, United Center, Chicago, IL, August 29, 1994.
Backstory: At WWE Royal Rumble 94, then-WWE World Heavyweight Champion Yokozuna defeated Taker in a casket match with the help of Crush (Brian Adams), the Great Kabuki, Genichiro Tenryu, "The Beast from the East" Bam Bam Bigelow, Adam Bomb (Bryan "The Nightstalker"/"Wrath" Clarke), "Double-J" Jeff Jarrett, the Headshrinkers (Samu and Fatu [Rikishi]) and "Big Daddy Cool" Diesel (Kevin Nash). In the process of the heels teaming up on Taker, they opened up Taker's urn and green smoke came out of it. As the heels rolled the casket up the aisle, smoke came out of it and Taker, who was supposedly "dying," appeared on the Titantron to deliver the following message.
"Be not proud, because the spirit of the Undertaker live within the souls of mankind, the eternal flame of life which cannot be extinguished, the origin of which cannot be explained. The answer lies in the everlasting spirit. Soon all mankind will witness the rebirth of the Undertaker. I will not rest in peace."
After this nonsense, Marty Jannetty in an Undertaker costume "rose" from the screen up to the top of the arena. (He showed up as himself for the actual Rumble at #29 and was the 24th elimination, lasting 8:18.) On Shawn Michaels' "Heartbreak Hotel" segment on the June 11, 1994 (taped May 25, 1994) episode of WWF Superstars, DiBiase introduced the newest member of the Million Dollar Corporation: The Undertaker. Actually, it was Tennessee regular Brian Lee dressed up as Taker. Paul Bearer, the regular Undertaker's manager, said that he was the only one who could bring the Undertaker back. (The real story is that Mark "The Undertaker" Calloway had requested some time off to spend with his wife, so they thought up this ridiculous storyline for him. As an aside, the regular Undertaker had competed at house shows in Japan, the Philippines, Guam, Hawaii, Nebraska and Iowa, as well as TV tapings for episodes of WWF Superstars to be aired later, when he was supposed to be "missing." As a final note, Brian Lee, real name Brian Harris, was Mark Calloway's best man when Calloway married Sara.)
Paul brings two Druids with him who have the Undertaker's famous "double-wide double-deep casket." Lawler rips on Paul, saying "he doesn't have an Undertaker." Paul opens the casket and removes a bigger and better urn, to replace the one the heels had opened up at Royal Rumble 94. Taker's music hits and the man returns. Unfortunately, Lee is shorter than Taker and has different color hair, which sort of wrecks the illusion. We get a lot of punches, Irish whips and shoulderblocks, with neither guy selling much of anything. Taker leapfrogs (!) Faker and sends him to the floor. Faker stalks Paul who tells him, "It's all over for you, ohhh yesss!" Taker brings Lee back into the ring by the hair. Taker controls, still no real selling from either guy. Eventually, Faker gets a tombstone but doesn't cover, which proves his undoing. Vince: "Nothing is happening." Taker sits up and Faker goes for a second Tombstone, but Taker escapes and hits his own, then two more for the pin. Into the casket, good night. Lee would spend almost three years in SMW, the USWA and ECW before returning to WWE on the June 23, 1997 Raw as Chainz of the Disciples of Apocalypse, with Crush, 8-Ball and Skull (Ron and Don Harris). A really dumb match that definitely should not have been a PPV main event. DUD.
UT (w/PB) vs. Kwang [Savio Vega](w/Harvey Wippleman), WWF Monday Night Raw, Lowell Memorial Auditorium, Lowell, MA, September 12, 1994 (taped August 15, 1994).
I'm laughing out loud at Vince's dead-serious attempts to sell Kwang as any kind of threat. Note that this match was taped two weeks before UT's official return at SummerSlam, but aired a month later. UT tosses Kwang around but Kwang chops him but UT no-sells. UT controls but misses the elbowdrop. Taker sits up and Kwang kicks him to the floor, but Taker's up again. UT back in and he controls for a while. We're clipped to Taker's post-commercial break comeback. Kwang clotheslines Taker to the floor, but he lands on his feet. Harvey distracts the ref, which allows Kwang to spit green mist at Taker. Taker sort of brushes it off and spits it back at Kwang. Chokeslam finishes to a big pop. * for the unintentionally funny commentary.
Casket Match: UT (w/PB) vs. Yokozuna (w/Mr. Fuji and James E. Cornette), WWE Survivor Series 94, Freeman Coliseum, San Antonio, TX, November 23, 1994.
This, of course, is the return blowoff match from the Royal Rumble, although they had done the match several times on the house show circuit. Chuck Norris is the special enforcer to ensure that we don't get a repeat of the first match's ending. Cool start as UT does the thumb-across-the-throat sign and points down to the casket and Yoko panics and falls on his huge ass. (He was over 600 lbs. at this point.) Fuji then has to offer some words of motivation to get Yoko in the match. Yoko tries to escape, but UT drags him back into the ring. Yoko reverses the whip and sends UT into the corner, but Taker no-sells the avalanche. UT gets in some chops and whips Yoko towards the casket, but Yoko panics and stops. UT chops Yoko out of the ring and onto the casket, right in front of Norris. UT follows for a half-speed chase on the floor. Back in for the ropewalk and the flying forearm. Neat spot as Yoko reverses a whip and hits a single-arm Samoan Drop. Taker sits up and Yoko clotheslines him. Taker sits up again and Yoko counters with some headbutts. Yoko tries to finish but UT comes back. UT snaps Yoko's neck off of the top rope and Yoko collapses in the ring. UT misses the elbow, but he sits up after. Yoko hits a Rock Bottom and a legdrop, but he can't finish. UT pulls Yoko into the casket and we get more chopping. Fuji gets involved, but UT goes after him and grabs him by the throat. Cornette distracts UT, so UT wallops him. Back in, Yoko slams UT, but UT sits up again. Yoko takes over. We're clipped to King Kong Bundy and "The Beast from the East" Bam Bam Bigelow, then members of the Million Dollar Corporation, coming out to trash-talk and occupy the refs. This allows Irwin R. Schyster (I.R.S.,aka Mike Rotunda) to run in and put down UT with a sleeper and then leave. This would launch UT's feud with the Million Dollar Corporation that would run throughout 1995. Corny tries to get Yoko going again. Yoko gets UT in the casket again, but UT blocks him from closing the lid. "Double-J" Jeff Jarrett comes out and makes the dumb mistake of crossing Chuck Norris. Norris kicks him and Jarrett takes a sick-looking bump, rolling on the back of his head and neck. However, he gets up and walks away. Back in the ring, UT comes back and takes over with a big clothesline, a big DDT and a Big Boot to put Yoko in the casket. Fuji protests, so Taker grabs the Japanese flag, breaks the pole in half, throws the remnants in the casket and closes the lid for the win. ***
You can watch this match here.
UT (w/PB) vs.Jim "The Anvil" Neidhart (w/"The King of Harts" Owen Hart), WWF Superstars, Burlington Memorial Auditorium, Burlington, VT, November 19, 1994 (taped October 18, 1994)
A fun power match with the usual stuff from both guys (a lot of clotheslines, slams, boots, shoulderblocks, etc.) Owen shouts encouragement throughout, yelling "He's only human!" At one point, Paul leaves the ring area. Owen addresses the camera: "I knew he could do it. He's only human, and the Anvil is going to beat him. Undertaker, rest in peace." At another point, Owen yells "Anvil is awesome." Paul comes back with the casket, and Owen protests to the camera. Taker comes back and sends Anvil into the casket. Anvil realizes where he is and freaks out. He gets out and abandons the match, giving UT the win by countout. ***. Plus, Owen's presence always added something special.
Casket Match: UT (w/PB) vs. Jerry "The King" Lawler, Coliseum Video exclusive from a WWF Wrestling Challenge taping, Westchester County Center, White Plains, NY, September 28, 1994.
Stall, stall, stall, Lawler does the phantom foreign object stuff (it's never determined whether he actually had a weapon or not), punch, punch, punch, trash-talking, in other words the usual Lawler crap. Lawler goes after Paul on the floor, and Paul opens up the urn and shines the light in Lawler's face. Back in the ring, UT gets the tombstone and looks to be bitching Lawler out before eventually rolling him into the casket for the win. DUD.
The Bottom Line: Well, if you're looking for ***** scientific classics, you're in the wrong place. However, if, like me, you are a big Undertaker fan and love the old-school Deadman gimmick, then this is the tape for you.