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Lou Loves Only Me


We should never be THIS bored....


Happy President's Day everyone! You may be sitting there asking what do people do when they have a day off from school and work? The answer? They have retarted IM Convos like this one....read on....

LOU LOVES ONLY ME


Jigga: have you seen the music video for justins movie?

$$: yes.........

$$: good hell.

$$: kiss me justin. please?

Jigga: seriously. and those eyes.

$$: those lips.

$$: that tongue.

$$: that body.

Jigga: those lips.

$$: i already said that....lol

Jigga: those lips.

$$: yeah, those lips.

$$: hey and dont forget about those lips

Jigga: mmm hmm

$$: hey have you ever daydreamed about justins lips?

$$: cuz he has nice lips

$$: i dont know if you have ever noticed

Jigga: ehhh just like 500 times a day

Jigga: but not really.

Jigga: and i never like, have thoughts about his naked body or anything either.

$$: yeah me neither. cuz that would be just gross. justin naked on your bed. who would ever want to think of that?

Jigga: hell no. HELL no. and when he grabs his crotch and everyone screams, i'm like what? what's the big deal?

$$: yeah. i know. like that is supposed to be sexy or something? i mean and when he does body rolls? man. that is so not sexy that he can move his hips like that.

Jigga: seriously. i get so bored watching it, i'm like.... ok so what

Jigga: i mean he's not THAT hot

$$: yeah no kidding. and like when he thrusts and pulls his jacket off on crazy things we'll do. i mean, thats like no big deal. whatever. i know TONS of guys that dan do that with their body.

Jigga: if you like that hard bodied, sensual lipped, sexy, tall and lean type, i guess

$$: yeah and don't forget blonde blue eyed

Jigga: oh right... and those curls? uh? sexy...? i think not

$$: i know it. and his voice. whatever.

Jigga: uhh. but that lou pearlman. THERE's a real man. he should start his own boyband

$$: oooohhh yeah. lou and his sexy gut. who wants a six pack of chisled muscle when you can have a huge fat gut?

Jigga: hell yeah. but for me, it's the receding hairline baby

$$: oh baby. that is tooo hott. i want to run my fingers through his two hairs.

Jigga: sometimes, when i cant sleep at night, i secretly go to the back of my closet where i keep my "louis p. shrine" and i just sit there and cry because i can't have him

$$: i have a scrapbook where i keep all the pictures i have of lou, and i kiss them every night before i go to bed.

$$: i have lou pearlman sheets, so it is like i am sleeping with him every night.

Jigga: lucky! do you have the one where he's scarfing 9 hot dogs at once and there's mustard oozing out of the side of his mouth? holy hell. can you say SEX ME?

$$: NOO...OH MY GOD...YOU MUST SEND IT RIGHT NOW....

$$: sex me lou...sex me now.

Jigga: fuck, it's not scanned.

$$: DAMNIT.

Jigga: but i will SO mail you like 5 8 x 10's okay?

Jigga: it's on my ceiling. it's the last thing i see before i go to sleep and the first thing i say when i wake up in the middle of the night when i pee

$$: lou's all i've ever wanted lou's all i've ever needed so tell me what to do now cuz i want lou's sex.

Jigga: du duu duun

$$: oh god. you are my hero. its so nice to know there are other people out there that love lou as much as i do.

Jigga: i am there, girl. you are not alone.

$$: thank god. it so nice to have someone else to talk to about it. lou...oh god...i want him. so damn bad.

Jigga: i saw him on the list a couple of weeks ago and i found myself shivering uncontrolabbly and crying liek a baby

$$: i bet lou would be really good in bed. he probably has some moves that would blow our minds.

$$: oooh i saw that. his voice sends shivers up my spine.

Jigga: sexy sexy sexy

$$: oh yeah. i mean with all that fat...mmmmmmmm.....he is so yum...

$$: i would definatley want HIM to be on top. woo hoo!

Jigga: those rolls are just to die for. one day, my fantasy is that he'll let me rub oil all over them

$$: oh nice visual.

Jigga: with "the right stuff" by his group, NKOTB playing the background

$$: how bout lou in the shower....oooh baby....with the droplets of water rolling down his belly...

$$: mmmmmmmmmmm sex me lou

Jigga: mm all wet and shit

$$: yeah and then his hair all wet....wowee

$$: and then he gets out and wraps that towel around him....god...i am making myself all worked up over here

$$: man. lou just does that to me.

Jigga: can you believe he's single? wtf?

$$: i know it! god i bet he has a million girls just throwing themselves at him....i know if i had the chance i would!

$$: maybe i should send him a sexy picutre of me with a description of how i would sex him up, do you think he would go for me?

Jigga: i have before. i've spent the night outside the chippendales headquarters just rolling around the grass

$$: wow. you are so lucky.

$$: i am looking at my lou poster right now. brb...i gotta go make out with it for a couple of minutes...

Jigga: hell yeah, he'd go for ya. i heard he likes southern belles... how do you think LANCE got into nsync?

$$: oohhh good point. maybe i should lay on the accent really think. do me lou, do me.

$$: uhhh making out with my lou poster makes me all hot.

Jigga: make sure you state where you're from. TOTAL turn on for him. i read that in Tiger Beat

$$: sweeet. i will....h/o...i am gonna write to you what i am gonna write to him, you tell me if it sounds ok...

Jigga: okay

$$: my dearest lou, i just want you to know how you have affected my life forever. before i knew of you, my life was empty. now i know that i have found my one real true love. lou, i want you more than i have ever wanted anything in my life. i would make you so happy. without you in my life i am not complete. please give me the opportunity to make our lives together. i love you now and forever. amy, georgia.

Jigga: awwww. that is soooo sweet, amy! how could he NOT fall for you?

$$: or should i make it more sexual? do you think he would like a dirtier version?

Jigga: make sure you send him the hooker picture of you in those motorcycle boots and fuzzy handcuffs?

$$: oooh ok. i will send him that and tell him that i want to see him in my fuzzy handcuffs in my bed. but thats after i wash his back and rub oil all over his sexy body.

Jigga: mmm, can i tape?

$$: oh yeah...oh god...maybe we could have a threesome?!!!!!?!??!!?

$$: i mean he is such a man....there is enough of him for the two of us at the same time....

Jigga: true true

at this point in the convo...nikki had to leave. but not before she told me this simple phrase..."LOU LOVES ONLY ME...." once again proving that two smart ass chicks with a website should NEVER be this bored....


JC is adopted (take him home)