The SPANK *NSYNC Campaign

OH BEHAVE.....RARRRRRR.....
We can't decide whether this is self-love or self-discipline. Hell, either way it works for us. Here are some of the reasons the boys deserve a good spanking. (Editors note: The page is black and blue cuz that will be the color of their asses when we are through with them. Thank you very much.)

Because our savings accounts are presently non-existant. We blame Justin for this one since we are paying for the new Beemer. *spank*

Because Justin put cornrows in his hair. UGH. *spank*

Because Christo got so mf hot and got a girlfriend. We love Dani, but he still deserves to be hit. *spank*

Because Joey is a whore, and gets off on the whole kinky spanking bit. *spank*

Because Justin likes Britney. We actually think that he should be smacked upside the head for this one, but we would rather touch his ass. *spank*

Because Lance dated Topanga. Nuff said. *spank*

Because JC is a cheapskate. We're not quite sure if we will be able to find his non-existant ass but... *spank*

Because they kill cows for their costumes and that is not the PC thing to do anymore. *spank*

Because they look hot no matter what. They deserve two for being so mf fine. *spank* *spank*

Because Lance just had a birthday....he is gonna rack up a lot on this one...*spank X's 21*

Because they put a clown on their cd cover. UGH, we HATE clowns. *spank*

Because they trusted Lou Pearlman. One *spank* for *NSYNC. We would try to spank Lou over this one, but we don't want our hands anywhere near his ass.

Because they let Joey's friend design that scary monster on the last tour. *spank*

Because they lie, and lying deserves proper punishment. *spank*

Because they let Lynn use Justin to promote Innosense. Justy gets one for this... *spank*

Because Joey feels the need to get to know his fans (ifyaknowhatimsayin). *spank*

Because they swear. We personally like it, and we like touching Lance's ass because he is the worst out of all of them...*spank* *spank* *spank* *spank* *spank*

Because what they do to us is illegal in 49 out of 50 states and International waters. *spank*

Because they have an obsession with strings. *spank*

Because they thrust in front of young children (and us). *spank*

Because they act immature. *spank*

Because of the new stage attire. Three ring circus meets the bedazzled yarn disaster. We want to slap the new stylest, but she was not available at press time. *spank*

Because of the new stage attire. We have heard rumors of leather and vinyl. And we sure as hell don't want to miss any ass action on that. *spanks all around*

Because Lance is so MF FIONE. *spank*

Because JC's voice is so friggin beautiful, and it makes us like him even when we try not to. *spank*

Because we have no self-control when it comes to them. Its their fault, not ours. *spank*

Because Christo is our idol and it's all done out of love. *spank*

Because Justin is white, but he doesn't know it. *spank*

Because they have reduced us to watching childrens programming i.e. Sesame Street and MF All That. It's just wrong. *spank*

Because we had to create The FMU Club because of them. Thanks a lot guys. *spank*

Because they wear wife beaters like no other.*spank* *spank* *spank* *spank* *spank*

Because they have taken the puppet thing a little too far. *spank*

Because they don't show us as much skin NOW as they did when they were younger and less buff. *spank*

Because they allowed Justin to rap. *spank*

Because they are all so photogenic and it pisses us off. *spank*

Because they look at themselves naked in the mirror, and then tell us about it. Ahh, the visuals. *spank*

Because JC needs cosmetic dentistry, and no one seems to let him on to that... *spank*

Because Lance can't keep both feet up or both feet down EVER. *spank*

Because Joey and Lance never get solos, and Christo didn't get one on NSA. Justin and JC get these next two *spank* *spank*

Because we have enough *NSYNC tapes to fill a Blockbuster. *spank*

Because every horse we see, we automatically dub "Toby". *spank*

Because we like Hot Boyz, and *NSYNC is what we WANT. *spank*

Because the stupid Pinnochio song is now semi-sexual. *spank*

Because they sing "Digital Getdown" in concert. One step further, they lay down and get nasty, nasty, get freaky, deaky, with the stage?!?!?!?!?! It's not right, and we're NOT gonna be OK. A *spank* for each of them.

Because they are naughty as Lance would say. *spank*

Because we like touching their asses. *spank*

Because JUSTIN IS HOT. *spank*

Damn our hands our tired. But that was worth it. Now that we got that out of our system, we can get on with our lives. (Or what is left of them. FMU FOREVER!)
JC is adopted (take him home)