"Honey, you're hurting me." Liz said to Justin.
"What?"
"I said you're hurting me." She repeated but her words were muffled by his cheek that was smashed up against her own.
"Is that a good hurt or a bad hurt?" He asked, whispering in her ear.
His warm breath did help relieve some of the pain she was in but as he moved again, it came right back. "It's a BAD hurt – please stop." She said, almost yelling at him.
He snapped his head up from its spot and tried to adjust his eyes to the darkness of his room. He could make out the slight glimpse of tears running down her cheeks and immediately moved his body away from hers.
"Ebby, honey what is it?" He asked, almost in a panic. He didn't understand how she had been so into what they were doing only a moment ago but now was crying beside him.
She brought both hands up to her face and tried to calm herself down. She still didn't answer him and that made him even more nervous.
He reached up, took her hands away, and held them in his own. "Ebby, look at me, please darlin, look at me." He said, pleading with her to tell him what was wrong.
She slowly slid her head towards him and could see the sadness in his eyes. She wanted to cry all over again. She didn't mean to upset him or scare him but she wasn't feeling good at all. "Justin, I'm sorry." She said as she moved her body to the side and came closer to him.
He put his arm around her and laid his head on top of hers. "Don't be sorry. Just talk to me. What happened?" He asked, rubbing his thumb over her shoulder.
She brought her hand up to his chest and began to move her fingers across it, making an indescribable design on his skin. "I don't know. One minute everything was fine but the next, it just hurt. Justin, I'm sorry. I know you wanted your first night back to be better than this." She said as her voice shook and she could feel the tears coming back.
He shifted his body around so that she was laying on her back again and he was on his stomach. He was closer to her level and lifted a hand to her face to brush away a few damp strands of hair from her eyes. "I don't need anything but having you here with me to make this night great. We don't have to do anything you don't want to do. I would never force myself on you like that. I hope you know it?" He asked as he saw her lift her eyes to the dark ceiling above.
She sniffed a few times before answering him. "Justin, it's not that I didn't want to but it just hurt for some reason and that scared me." She explained as she started to lift her hands back up to her face but he stopped her.
"No, don't start crying again. You know that breaks my heart every time you do, so if you love me, you won't do it." He said, trying to make her smile but it didn't work.
Even through the darkness, he could see the tears forcing themselves out of her eyes. She turned her head to look at him and gently touched his face with her fingers. "I do love you, Justin. I do."
That was the first time she had said that to him since they had gotten together. He was beyond touched by her words and maybe it was the fact that he had been run to the ground for the past 10 days or because Liz was laying there crying, or that the awful feeling inside him was back, but he just lost it as well.
He leaned over to place his lips ever so slightly on her forehead and closed his eyes as he kissed her. "I love you too." He said as his lips left her head.
She smiled into his neck that was within inches of her mouth and felt a tear of his own hit her face. She moved her hands around and pulled his head down to her level. She looked into his eyes, through the darkness that she had finally adjusted to, and saw the tired, worn out man who had just said the words she longed to hear.
She wiped the remains of the tear off with her thumb then pulled his lips down to hers and kissed him one last time that night before moving his head to her chest so he could relax against her collarbone.
She heard him let out a sigh and within minutes, he was sound asleep. She tried to close her eyes to find sleep herself but she couldn't get to the point of dreaming. She kept coming back to what he had said outside on the patio about something not being right.
She slid her free hand down her body and rested it on her stomach. It was tender to the touch and she felt the tears building back up at the thoughts running through her mind. 'It can't be.' She said as she entangled her fingers in Justin's curls and felt him snuggle up closer to her.
'I love you but what am I going to do if it's true.'
The next morning, Liz woke up to an empty bed. She looked around the room but didn't see Justin or even hear him. She figured he was downstairs or something so she slid her arms up over her head and stretched out her back. She winced at the slight pain she got in her lower stomach but passed it off as nothing.
She slowly rolled her tired body out of bed and felt the hard wooden floor on her bare toes. She pulled on one of Justin's large T-shirts to cover her body that was now cold for some reason and walked towards the bathroom.
After flushing the toilet, she looked at her reflection in the mirror and cringed at her appearance. Her and Justin had definitely gotten carried away last night after she made everyone leave early from the party, so she still had makeup on her face, though it was more on her cheeks then on her eyes.
From crying, her mascara had ran down the sides of her face and left dark streaks that she quickly washed away with the warm water that she turned on. She dried her face with a nearby towel and ran her hands through her tangled hair to straighten it out.
She had to shake her head at the pale complexion of her skin and the circles that were under her eyes. 'You have to get yourself a tan, girl. You look like a ghost.' She said to herself as she chuckled aloud.
She stood there another second getting a better look at herself in the mirror. She wondered why she hadn't noticed it before but for some reason, she looked awfully thin all of a sudden. She turned her head to the side to get a better look and slowly raised Justin's shirt up to reveal her small body.
She slid her hands over her hips and stomach. She almost gasped when her fingers felt the bones of her hips sticking out farther than she thought they were. She also noticed the way her legs seemed thinner as well.
It took her a moment to realize that it must be from all the running she was doing, lowered the T-shirt and finally turned to walk out of the room to find Justin.
She made her way down the hall and skipped to the bottom of the stairs. She may have looked like hell but she did feel much better than she had last night.
She looked in the den – no sign of him. She knocked on the downstairs bathroom, thinking he might be in there since she had been in his upstairs – nothing. She sighed a moment but then perked up when she thought that maybe he was in the kitchen making breakfast. She hurried into the room to find – squat.
She huffed and crossed her arms over her chest. She didn't want to yell for him in case he was on the phone or working on his music but she was getting frustrated. She didn't like the fact that she had woken up alone in the first place. She assumed that he would be too tired and would sleep most of the day but he was up and she didn't know where he…
She stopped thinking when she glanced out the kitchen window.
The frown she had on, turned up when she saw him sitting in a chair out on the patio, reading the paper.
She fixed herself a glass of orange juice before walking over to the door and opening it. The cool morning breeze blew by her and she inhaled the fresh scent. She loved the smell of the remains of a rainy night when dawn broke and the sun began to rise. It was something she would grow to cherish in the months to come.
She walked slowly up to Justin's relaxed form and ran a hand across his shoulders as she came around the side of him. He smiled immediately at her and folded the paper in half. He sat it down on the table beside him and reached behind her to guide Liz closer to him.
She allowed herself to be pulled onto his lap and let him take her glass from her hands to place next to his paper.
He brought both of his arms around either side of her waist and clung tight to her as her body fell on his. She moved her own arms around his neck and gently laid her head on top of his. "Good morning." She said into his curls as she kissed the top of them.
He shuffled around in his seat to get himself a little more comfortable while he held her in his arms. "Good morning to you too. How are you feeling?" He asked as slid one hand down from around her waist and placed it on her thigh. His eyes were glued to the spot that he was rubbing with his fingers.
She heard the concern in his voice and lifted his head with her hand to made him look her in the eye. "Justin, I'm so sorry about last night. I don't know what caused that to happen but I'm fine now. Please tell me that you're not mad that we didn't get to finish what we started." She said as she noticed the sincere look he was giving her and her heart melted.
"Ebby, I'm not mad, just worried about you. I know we had plans this weekend but if you don't feel good, then we can change…" He started but she quickly covered his mouth with her hand.
"Justin, nothing is changing about this weekend. I told you that I'm okay now. Come on, this is the last few days that I get to spend with you for almost a month and I don't want you worrying about me, okay." She said as she removed her hand from his mouth but replaced it with her own lips.
She felt him relax under her touch and his hand begin to creep up her leg. She giggled into his mouth and caught his hand before it went any further. "Isn't it a little early for that?" She asked as she tried to break free of the kiss.
He shook his head, making her own move from side to side with his, then slid his hand around from her thigh to underneath.
She jumped when he grabbed her butt and gave it a squeeze. That only made her laugh harder and this time, got out of the kiss. "Justin, you always tell me that I have a butt fetish but I think the tables have turned on you now." She said, trying to stifle her laughter but it was no use because he soon joined in with her.
"Yeah, but you have such a nice one to grab." He said in between breaths. "Hey, come on, as long as you're okay, we need to get ready to meet Joey and his family later. You need to go home to change – unless you want to hang out with his family in…ahem…my T-shirt. Not that I'd mind at all but you might give his dad a heart attack." He said as he tried to raise the shirt a little to expose her bare skin.
She slapped his hand away from her and gave him an evil look. "No thanks. I'll just go home and change if that's fine with you?" She asked as she started to get out of his grasp but he quickly stood with her in his arms. He wrapped his arm under her legs and started to walk into the house when he noticed the pale look on her face.
"Hey, are you okay?" He asked as he slowly put her down to stand on her own.
She brought one hand up to her forehead and the other to his chest to balance herself. "Yeah, just a little dizzy. I guess I need something to eat." She said as she shook off the bad feeling inside and raised her head to him.
He didn't look convinced so she wrung her hand in his shirt, bringing him closer to her. "Justin, I'm fine. I'll grab something to eat here and take it with me on my way home." She finished, let go of him and slowly walked to the door – keeping her concentration on what she was doing so she wouldn't lose her balance again.
He watched her go inside and shook his own head to clear the thoughts running through it. He marched inside, right behind her and asked again if she was fine. "Yes, now I'm gonna run upstairs and get my things together so I can get out of here and go take a hot shower at my own apartment. What time are you picking me up?" She asked, trying to get the subject changed.
He saw right through that but let it go for now. "Um, around noon. Oh, and don't get too dressed up, we're only hanging out at Joey's so wear big clothes. You'll be eating ALL day." He said as she nodded her head in agreement then turned to hop up the stairs.
When she reached his room, she shut the door and laid her head on it. 'This can't be happening again.' She told herself. 'Lord, make this stop.'
She took a deep breath and pushed herself off the door then grabbed her clothes and changed out of Justin's shirt. She prayed that today would be free of any problems that were becoming more and more frequent in her life.
Time would only tell what this day would bring.