Hey there. Welcome to the random page, full of, yep, that's right, randomness. There's no rhyme or reason to anything on this page, save the twisted imagination of the web mistress and her friends. Enjoy!
TOP TEN REASONS WHY NOAH RULES TYRLAND
In an effort to incite a riot, or stir things up a little bit, I am now posting the top ten reasons why Noah will forever be the KING of TRYland...*ahem*
10) Seriously, was there any other rider who could fill out a pair of pants like Noah? He'd make a blind woman blush.
9) Two words: Bull Whip.
8) Noah took baths quite regularly...or at least looked like he'd bathed.
7) Noah didn't have out-of-control eyebrows like some riders, who shall remain nameless(*hackKIDhack*)
6)Was Noah ever hiding an ewok in his shirt?
5)Noah had *the best* smile.
4)None of the other riders had an action figure created for them (so what if it was for another show!)
3)Noah exuded class and breeding...while the others, well, exuded in-breeding.
2)Did I mention the whip, yet?
And the Number One reason Noah is King of TYRland:
1)BOOTYLICIOUS
Thank you, and goodnight!
The Dixon Vixen!
Ok, so while trying to get the Kidettes all riled up, I compiled a list of ‘Yo Mama’ jokes…but of course I replace ‘yo mama’ with Kid. After a few death threats, I have decided to play fair and make fun of all the riders…yes, even my beloved Noah. Please remember that these were all done in order to lessen the monotony of my day, and are not meant to be taken personal. So, with out further ado:
Top Ten Lou Jokes:
10) Lou is so short, she can do backflips under the bunk.
9) Lou is so short, she models for trophies.
8) Lou has so much hair on her upper lip, she braids it.
7) Lou’s glasses are so thick, she can look at a map and see people waving.
6) Lou is so skinny, she turned sideways and disappeared.
5) Lou’s so short, she can sit on a curb and swing her legs.
4) Lou’s teeth are so yellow, I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter
3) Lou’s so dumb, she studied for a blood test and failed.
2) Lou’s so dumb, she thought Chubby Checker was a game for fat people.
1) Lou’s so skinny, she has to wear a belt with spandex.
Noah Jokes:
10) Noah is so poor, he can’t kill the roaches in his house because they pay half the rent.
9) Noah is so poor, his face is on the front of the food stamp.
8) Noah is so poor, he was in K-Mart with Hefty bags. When I asked ‘What are you doing?”, he said “Buying luggage.”
7) Noah’s lips are so big, Chapstick had to invent a spray!
6) Noah’s house is so dirty, he has to wipe his feet before he goes outside.
5) Noah’s so country, he had cornbread for a wedding cake.
4) Noah’s so ghetto, his idea of a fortune cookie is and Oreo with a food stamp in the middle.
3) Noah’s so ghetto, he washes paper plates.
2) Noah’s so ghetto, he keeps his food stamps in a money clip.
1) Noah’s so poor, when I asked “What’s for dinner?”, he whipped out his gun and said “Next one who moves.”
Top Ten Teaspoon Jokes:
10) Teaspoon’s so old, he still owes Jesus a nickel.
9) Teaspoon’s so old, when I told him to act his age, he dropped dead.
8) Teaspoon’s so old, his social security number is 1.
7) Teaspoon’s so old, he knew Mr. Clean when he had an afro.
6) Teaspoon’s so old, he was a waiter at The Last Supper.
5) Teaspoon’s so old, when Moses split the Red Sea, he was on the other side fishing.
4) Teaspoon’s so old, he knew Burger King when he was still a Prince.
3) Teaspoon’s so old, when he was young, rainbows were black and white.
2) Teaspoon’s so old, he called the cops when David and Goliath started fighting.
1) Teaspoon’s so old, he has an autographed Bible.
Top Ten Buck Jokes:
10) Buck’s so skinny, you can blindfold him with dental floss.
9) Buck’s so skinny, he uses Chapstick for deodorant.
8) Buck’s so skinny, he has to stand in the same place twice to cast a shadow.
--I’m sorry, I can’t do anymore Buck jokes because the Buckettes are all such nice chicks and I actually feel guilty for doing this!
Top Ten Ike Jokes:
10) Ike’s so bald, when he puts on a turtle neck, he looks like roll on deodorant.
9) Ike’s teeth are so ugly, he got pulled over for not having dental insurance.
8) Ike’s so ugly, when he looks in the mirror, his reflection ducks.
7) Ike’s so ugly, his shadow quit!
6) Ike’s so ugly, his pillow cries at night.
5) Ike’s so ugly, he climbed the ugly ladder and didn’t miss a step.
4) If ugly was bricks, Ike would have his own Projects.
3) Ike’s so ugly, he could scare Cujo off a meet truck.
2) Ike’s so ugly, he didn’t get hit with the ugly stick, he got hit with the ugly log.
1) Ike’s so ugly, he makes onions cry!
Top Ten Cody Jokes:
10) Cody’s so dumb, I saw him walking down the street, yelling into an envelope. When I asked “What are you doing?” He said “Sending a voice mail.”
9) Cody’s so dumb, if I gave him a penny for his thoughts, I’d get change back.
8) Cody’s so dumb, if I asked him to speak his mind, he’d be speechless.
7) Cody’s so dumb when I told him “Christmas is just around the corner.” He went looking for it.
6) Cody’s so dumb, he tried to wake up a sleeping bag.
5) Cody’s so dumb, he climbed over a glass wall to see what was behind it.
4) Cody’s so dumb, his latest invention is a glass hammer.
3) Cody’s so dumb, he couldn’t tell me which way the elevator was going if I gave him two guesses.
2) Cody’s so dumb, he tried to drown a fish.
1) Cody’s mouth is so big, he talks in surround sound
Top Ten Jimmy Jokes:
10) Jimmy is so dirty he made Speed Stick slow down.
9) Jimmy is so dirty, he has to creep up on the bath water.
8) Jimmy is so dirty, he went swimming and now we have the Dead Sea.
7) Jimmy’s so dirty he used Sure, and it got confused.
6) Jimmy’s so greasy he uses bacon as a band aid.
5) Jimmy’s so dumb he thought a hot meal was stolen food.
4) Jimmy’s so dumb he got locked into Thompkin’s store and starved.
3) Jimmy’s breath is so bad, when he yawns his teeth duck.
2) Jimmy’s so greasy he sweats Crisco.
1) Aww, Jimmy ain’t so bad…he’d give you the hair off his back!
Kid Jokes:
1)Kid’s so ugly, he went into a haunted house and came out with an application!
2)Kid’s so ugly they filmed ‘Gorillas in the Mist’ in his shower.
3)Kid’s so ugly, the government moved Halloween to his birthday.
4) Kid’s so hairy, he shaves with a weed-whacker
5) Kid’s so stupid, he got a peep-hole in a glass door.
6) Kid’s so stupid he took a ruler to bed to see how long he slept!
7) Kid’s so stupid he took the Pepsi challenge and chose Jif.
--I could go on and on, but do I really need too? Naw.
