Welcome Students to the "How to be black" I'm your instructor Justin Timberlake of Nsync. I've been a master at this art for over 8 years. Dis class in da end gonn' have you tawlking like da brotha's do. Here we'll be using visual as well as oral presentation to demonstrate how to hang.
STEP ONE: GET THE ACCESSORIES
Notice the ICE. Hold on a question from a student.
Question: What is Ice?
Justin: Ice is refering to your jewelry you have to have the ice to bring attention to how much loot you really have. Other accessories include cell phone, pager, rings, the rolex and of course the expensive car keys.
STEP TWO: MASTERING WALKING LIKE A BROTHA.
As you can see if you're gonna do the walk do it right. Make sure to have the accessories to go along with it, the cellphone in one hand and the pager in the other and never I repeat never ever look in front of you while you're walking.
STEP THREE: GETTING THE LOOK.
If you notice in the pictures above you have to have that serious look with the head tilt to the side. That's the look of the brotha's that know they got it. But there must always be that time when you flash those pearly whites. On occasion you gotta show that hey I got the serious look but I take care of my teeth too. If you're looking to be the hard core brotha' a gold tooth will be the perfect accessory it's a must you have one of those. Gotta have the clothes to go along with it. You know you gotta have the FUBU. You must own at least one FUBU shirt, the color doesn't matter, me I prefer the baby blue jersey.
STEP FOUR: NEVER ADMIT YOU GOT A GIRL.
No matter how strong the evidence is against you always deny it. You deny it till you're caught and even if you're caught you can still deny it. You gotta keep da hunnies happy. They gotta know they can have you or else you's be groupie less and dat ain't right.
STEP FIVE: THE RIDE
You gotta have da ride to go cruisin fo da hunnies in. One of these two are mostly prefered it usually means ya gonna git da drawers later on dat night. Make sure you hook da ride up too. Gotta put the Chrome rims on there and don't fogit da heavy bass system. Ya wan't da hunnies to know ya commin' even when you ain't there yet.
You got the ride you got the tunes. You gots to have the R&B's and HIP HOP. There should be open minded to all kinds but being blacks takes that special ummph to love hip hop. You know it's a innoventive artform. Dangelo teaches you the swoon the hunnies. Nelly and Puff Daddy and JAY-Z you know it's party time with a ride full of hunnies going to party and chill. ONE important thing you can't be black and don't love Janet Jackson. You gotta love Janet, love her so much you scream like a bitch just mentioning Janet. OMG OMG its Janet Jackson. Besides I learned my moves from watching her videos. If you follows these simple steps you'll be well on your way to being the most successful wanna be. Thank fo chillen up in heah wit meh Jdawg. You know the call me LAKE, TIMBA TIMBA TIMBALAKE! Please pay as you leave no checks cash only! Yo betta gats mah moneh, ya'll know how people be wit dem bounce checks, give yo da paper and know they ain't gots da cash.
STEP SIX: HAVING THE TUNES TO ACCOMODATE THE RIDE!!!
