Title: It Had to be You
Author/pseudonym: Tinnean
Fandom: JAG
Pairing: Clayton Webb/Clark Palmer
Rating: FRM
Disclaimer: Not mine, they'd be better off if they
were. Well, except for
Status: new/complete
Date: 10/05
Series/Sequel: This is number 13 in the Soundbyte
series. It follows Black Coffee.
Summary: Clay's looking forward to a quiet dinner
with
Warnings: m/m, AR, in that this universe presupposes
that the DSD was never disbanded.
Notes: Soundbytes are an off-shoot of the Mind Fuck
universe. They are not necessarily in chronological order. This takes place just
before the events of Be It Ever So Humble. Cochon is French for pig. Thanks as
always to Gail for the beta.
It Had to be You
By
Tinnean
The first thing I did when I got home from spending the evening with
Clark Palmer was to call him to let him know I was home.
"Thanks for humoring me, baby. Have a safe trip, okay?"
"Sure. I know you don't want to come after me again."
"Wise ass. I'll see you next week."
"Yes. Thanks for tonight,
"What can I tell you? I'm the best."
We both laughed and hung up. Only then did I murmur, "Yes, you
are."
He'd been worried about me making the drive while I was so tired, had
even offered to drive me home and catch a cab back into DC.
Usually I was the one who had to be concerned about my dates. It was a
nice change to have someone concerned about me, and I found I liked it. Very
much.
The second thing I did when I got home from spending the evening with
Clark Palmer was to check my answering machine. There was one message, and I
pressed the play button.
"Clay, there's been a change of plans." It was D.B. Cooper, a
friend and fellow officer at the Company. "You're taking the redeye out of
Dulles."
"Dammit," I muttered to myself. The original plan had been for
me to fly out of Reagan in the morning.
"Sorry about the short notice. Your ticket will be waiting at the
Delta counter. I'll meet you there. I've got something that should prove
useful." The call ended.
I glanced at my wristwatch. There wasn't even time for me to take a
shower.
I took the stairs to my bedroom two at a time, pulled the suitcase from
my closet, and packed, and thirty-five minutes later, I arrived at Dulles.
"Clay. I didn't expect to see you this soon."
"D.B. It's a damn good thing there were no cops on the 495 tonight.
I think I broke every speed limit getting here."
"Well, you've got twenty minutes until boarding."
I blew out a disgusted breath and he laughed.
I handed my ID to the clerk. "You're holding my ticket, I believe?
Clayton Webb."
"Yes, of course, Mr. Webb."
"I'm checking one suitcase."
"Very good, sir."
While she was busy checking me in, D.B. looked me over.
There had been no time to change, and I knew I had to look a little rumpled –
I'd tossed my clothes off in an effort to get Palmer into me faster, and they'd
landed every which way.
D.B.'s mouth curled in a grin. "So. Are you still seeing that someone who
put a smile on your face and a spring in your step?"
"Yes."
"When are you going to tell me who she is?"
"When are you going to tell me who you've been seeing?"
"Never?"
"There you go."
"You're a spoilsport, Clay."
"Your boarding pass and your ID, sir. Your flight will be leaving
from Gate 14, Concourse B. You'll arrive in
"Barring unforeseen delays."
"Thanks so much for trying to cheer me up," I growled at D.B.
The clerk tried to bite back a grin. "… to
"Thank you."
"I'll walk you to the gate, Clay." D.B. fell into step beside
me and lowered his voice. "I've got something for you." He handed me a
microchip.
"Thanks. R&D has come up with something new?"
"In a manner of speaking. This is by way of the late, lamented
Michael Shaw."
"Lamented? Don't you mean *un*lamented?" No one in the
CIA had much respect for men who were willing to sell out the agencies for which
they worked, but then Shaw hadn't been trying to sell out the DSD; he'd been
trying to sell out Clark Palmer.
D.B.'s grin was sour. "He must have been better than I gave him
credit for. There've been no wrinkles that the DSD is even aware it went
missing."
"Hmmm. What does it do?"
"This'll make any computer anywhere in the world as safe to use as
the one in your office. If anyone tries to intercept what you're sending, all
they'll get is what looks like Russian pig Latin."
"That should throw them." I turned it over, then put it in the
inside pocket of my suit jacket.
"Yeah. Well, here we are. This is your gate." He gave my arm a
friendly smack. "Watch your ass, buddy."
"Take it easy, D.B."
He left, a jaunty swing to his stride, and I handed my boarding pass to
the airline representative and walked onto the jet.
****
From the moment I set foot on Thai soil the week before, I'd been on the
go, and it had been a long, futile week. Now it was time to wrap up what I
could, file my report, and catch a flight out of
Concealing how disgruntled and tired I was, I sauntered into an Internet
café, found a machine that wasn't surrounded by kids playing computer games –
shouldn't they have been in school? – and casually slipped in the microchip
that D.B. had given me.
I typed up my report, secure in the knowledge that if anyone tried to
intercept it, all they would see was gibberish, hit 'send,' emailing it to James
Watts, Director of the CIA, and logged out of the program, the microchip once
again in my pocket.
I'd already checked out of the hotel where I'd been staying, so I caught
a cab directly to the airport.
When my flight from the
By the time I deplaned, went down to baggage claim, where fortunately my
suitcase was among the first to arrive on the carousel, then waited for a
shuttle to take me to the lot where my Lexus was parked, the sky had lightened
considerably.
I'd be driving home through rush hour traffic.
Meanly enough, and because I was so tired, I blamed Director Watts for
specifically having had those arrangements made for me. It was a 40-minute drive
to my home in
Because of the traffic, the drive wound up taking me more than an hour,
and by the time I pulled into my drive, I could cheerfully have lynched
Since I had no intention of taking my car out again until
this evening, I parked it in the garage. My priorities were shower and catch up
on all the sleep I'd missed, meet my lover, Clark Palmer, for our usual
Friday evening dinner at Raphael's, then spend the weekend in bed with him ...
The thought of the things
I unlocked the door to my townhouse, stepped inside, and shut it behind
me. The cool air smelled of furniture polish, floor wax, and a potpourris of
apples, cloves, and cinnamon. The cleaning company I employed had been by while
I'd been away.
I leaned against the door and rubbed my eyes with my free hand, then
straightened, my attention caught by the flashing light on my answering machine.
I dropped my suitcase and stabbed the play button.
"Clayton, I'm calling about our riding date on Sunday. You said you
anticipated being back on Friday, but if I haven't heard from you by Saturday,
I'll assume you won't be able to make it. Oh, and if
"I love you too, Mother," I said softly to the machine. It
pleased me that she was willing to take a hand in finding
I wished he felt comfortable enough with our relationship to let me stay
at his apartment more frequently, but I could understand his reluctance, since a
DSD agent lived in the apartment right below his. On the few occasions we had
wound up there and run into Matheson, his agent,
I blinked, a little surprised to find that I liked the idea of belonging
to Palmer, of him belonging to me.
I'd never done sex lightly, and because of my job I'd had to be careful
of being involved with a civilian, whether male or female. There had been long
stretches where I'd gone without any physical intimacy, and frankly hadn't
seemed to miss it, and I'd wondered if perhaps I had a chemical imbalance.
All that changed when I realized Clark Palmer was so curious about me
that he'd impersonated a friend from my Phillips Exeter days and persuaded my
mother to give him an interview. My invitation to dinner on his birthday was
supposed to have been nothing more than a clever way of letting him know I was
onto him, but somehow it had gone beyond that, and I'd gone down on him in the
men's room of Raphael's exclusive restaurant.
And now we were lovers.
The next message began to play, drawing me out of my reverie, and I
smiled.
"Hi, baby. I know you're not home yet, but..."
My smile broadened. He'd called just to hear my voice on my machine.
Another message started, and that smile faded into a frown.
"Webb, it's Director Watts. I know you're away just now…"
And didn't he sound happy about that? "… but when you return from your
trip on Friday… "
My trip, which had been less than useless, and I was certain he'd known
that when he'd sent me on it.
"… you'll be needed at State. You should be flattered. The
Undersecretary asked for you specifically." Director Watt's attitude toward
me since that debacle with Prinzip had wavered between falsely jovial and
patently resentful.
The Company's inaction – *his* inaction – when I and other
officers of the CIA had been kidnapped and held in a Paris warehouse was
something that under another director would have been unacceptable.
Clark Palmer had been the one to come to our rescue, with some help from
an associate of his from Section One.
"By the way, I'll expect your report regarding this mission on my
desk by Monday." Obviously he hadn't checked his email. "Have a nice
weekend, Webb." There was a click and then the hum of the dial tone.
"Bastard," I snarled at my hapless answering machine.
The last message began. "Mr. Webb, this is your Lexus Dealership.
We're calling to confirm your appointment on Friday at 11 for an oil change and
tune-up. Please give us a call if you're unable to keep your appointment."
I sighed and went into the kitchen to start a pot of coffee brewing,
then retrieved my suitcase and carried it upstairs to my bedroom, where I laid
out a clean suit and took a shower. I'd erase the messages another time, after
I'd added
****
The shower helped, although not as much as I'd hoped.
I dragged myself out of the bathroom and eyed my bed with regret. I'd
never been able to sleep on trans-oceanic flights, and I particularly loathed
flights that crossed so many time zones that I arrived before I'd actually left.
I was still dragging when I finished dressing. The thought of preparing
breakfast left me even more tired.
Palmer knew I made it a point never to miss the first meal of the day;
he also knew I preferred to cook from scratch with fresh ingredients, but the
last time he'd stayed for the weekend, he'd brought a brown grocery bag filled
with frozen breakfasts with him.
'I've got better things in mind for you than spending the morning
cooking, baby,' he'd told me, the corner of his mouth quirked in a grin. I'd let
him stock my freezer, then had caught his arm and pulled him after me up the
stairs and into my bedroom.
'You're a natural bottom, Clay,' he'd murmured in my ear as he pushed my
legs back and slid into me, the burn quickly morphing to pleasure. 'Who'd have
thought?'
'I guess you think that makes you special…' I'd groaned as he licked
the line of my jaw. '… getting a Webb to lie down for you?'
'Baby, I think that makes you special.' And he'd framed my face with his
palms and kissed me, ravaging my mouth as thoroughly as he ravaged my body.
Remembering the torrid love-making that had followed, my cock twitched,
but I was still too tired for it to do more than that.
I scrubbed my face and poured myself a cup of coffee. While it sat on
the counter, I took a box from the freezer.
Pancakes and sausages, courtesy of Aunt Jemima, went into the microwave.
And it wasn't bad.
The drive into the Capital was uneventful, and I dropped the Lexus off
at the dealership and took advantage of their courtesy service to get a ride to
State.
When I arrived there, it was to find a strange woman at the desk in my
outer office.
"Mr. Webb isn't in just now." Her stare was cool. "May I
help you, sir?"
"I'm Webb."
She turned red. "Oh, Mr. Webb! I'm so sorry! I wasn't expecting…
didn't recognize… " She coughed to cover her sudden fluster. "I
didn't think you'd be in."
I raised an eyebrow.
"Just yet!" she added hastily and offered a weak smile.
"I'm Darlene Copeland."
"Ms. Copeland. Where's Ms. Johnson?" Bette was the woman who
was assigned to work as my secretary whenever I was in State.
"Oh, er… She… um… I
was just told I'd be filling in for her. For today."
"I hope nothing is wrong." Bette couldn't hold a candle to
Janet, my secretary at the Company, but she was a hard worker, and I liked her.
"I'm sure everything is… " She coughed again. "Can I
get you a cup of coffee, Mr. Webb?"
"If there's any fresh."
"I'll brew a fresh pot."
"That isn't… "
"I don't mind."
"That will be fine, then; thank you. Dark, very little sugar."
"Yes, sir." There was relief in her expression. She rose and
came from around her desk, the skirt she wore flirting around her knees, and she
hurried out.
This was getting odd.
I went into my office and closed the door, deciding to use this
opportunity to call
"Palmer." Impatience in his voice, and I wondered who'd been
pissing off my lover.
"Hi. It's me." I didn't have to tell him who 'me' was.
"Hello, me." The
impatience was replaced by a smile, and hearing it made me smile myself and feel
less tired.
"I'm just calling to make sure we're on for dinner tonight."
"It's Friday, isn't it? I'll see you at Raphael's at eight. Want me
to make the reservations?"
"If you wouldn't mind?" I studied the stacked files on my
desk. There was even more than
"Sure thing."
"Thanks. And speaking of reservations..." He'd agreed to spend
some time with me, away from the bustle of DC. After this past week I was
looking forward to getting away even more.
"I called Taylor House. We're booked for a week from Sunday. I also
booked a flight out of Reagan down to
"You do good work, Palmer."
"You're not just finding that out, are you? Okay," briskly. We
both knew a conversation at work wasn't the wisest thing. "I'll see you
about 8 tonight?"
"About 8, then. Bye, babe."
"Bye."
I shut my phone and put it down on my desk. After dinner we'd probably
drive back to my place, and then we'd…
Well, if I knew my lover, we'd spend most of the weekend in bed, aside
from the time we spent with my mother.
That reminded me. I needed to call Mother to confirm Sunday's ride.
The answering machine at the house in
Rather than leave a message, I decided to try the mobile phone in her
car.
Mother picked up on the second ring. "Clayton! Are you home?"
"In a manner of speaking. I'm back in DC."
"Working? Director Watts hasn't given you some time off?"
"No. He left a message on my machine. Undersecretary Sinclair asked
that I come in today."
"Hmmm."
"On top of that, the Lexus is in the shop for an oil change."
"Again?"
I shrugged, even though she couldn't see me. "It's time."
"You sound tired, sweetheart." There was concern in her voice.
"How are you?"
"Tired." Damn. I hadn't wanted that to slip out.
"Did you want to cancel Sunday?"
"I'm not that tired," I lied. I'd be better after a good
night's sleep. Inane platitudes. I stifled a groan.
"Of course you're not," she agreed dryly.
I decided to change the subject. "Have you talked to our mutual
friend about the condo?"
"Not yet. I wanted to gather as much information about it as I
could. I'll be in the Capital shortly – I have a fitting at Madame Rosa's,
that embassy ball, if you'll recall – and I thought I'd give him a call and
see if he's free to view it today."
"That's a good idea. I'm having dinner with him tonight, and I'll
see about bringing him along on Sunday."
"Don't pressure him, sweetheart. If he'd prefer not to ride…
"
"He'll ride, Mother. If only to prove to the horse who's the
boss." There was a tap on my door, and my temporary secretary let herself
in. "I have to go now, Mother. I'll see you on Sunday."
"Yes. Take care of yourself, Clayton. Goodbye."
"Goodbye." I frowned at the woman standing before my desk.
"Yes, Ms. Copeland?"
"Your coffee, sir. I also have a list of the meetings you need to
attend."
"Meetings?" I stared at the stack of paperwork. I'd been under
the impression I'd been called in to deal with that.
"And the Undersecretary wants you to join him in the dining room
for lunch at his usual time."
"All right. Damn." I gestured toward the files. "I don't
know when I'll be able to get to these."
"Oh, I can have someone take care of them for you, sir."
"Can you?" Then why had the Undersecretary insisted I come in
today? This was getting even more odd. "That's very efficient of you. Thank
you. Now, who am I supposed to see first?"
****
Shortly after 1, I excused myself from a meeting that was as futile as
my week in
"It's good to see you again, Clayton, although I must say you're
looking a little worse for wear."
"It's been a difficult week. You understand I can't talk about
it."
"Of course not." He sat, and I took the seat to his right.
"Sample this fruit cup, why don't you? Samuel is trying something new. It
has a strawberry dressing."
I tasted it. "Very good."
"Samuel will be pleased to know you're enjoying it. He always said
you have the palate of an epicure." He reached for a roll and began to
butter it. "Tell me. How is your uncle, Clayton?" Undersecretary
Sinclair had been at State since the Johnson administration. He'd known my Uncle
Tony and had readily agreed when he'd asked him to give me a cover position as
his assistant.
"Uncle Tony is doing well, thank you."
"I think we were all quite surprised when he followed
"They've found a mansion that's reputed to have been the home of
Ramon Navarro at one time. While
"I imagine he's cutting a swath through all the ladies in
I paused in taking a bite of my own roll. I wasn't about to tell him
that Uncle Tony had fallen in love with a woman who was a third his age, and who
had a child from a previous relationship. Mother had flown out to
'I've never seen your uncle so besotted,' she'd told me.
'Over this woman, or over the fact that she brings him a ready-made
family?'
'Truthfully? I was unable to tell. Tony won't hear a word against her,
not that I was foolish enough to say anything.'
Sebrings might dally where they would, but once they fell in love, it
was forever. Webbs were like that too.
'And she?'
Mother had shrugged. 'She rides. At least they have that in common.'
'Don't be difficult, Mother. You know I meant, what are her feelings
toward Uncle Tony?'
'She seems to care a great deal for him. Whether that's as a spouse, a
father for her child, or a meal ticket, remains to be seen.'
'Do you want me to look into her background, Mother?'
'That won't be necessary, sweetheart.' She'd given a tight smile. 'I
have a… friend keeping an eye on how things go.' She still kept in touch with
people she'd known when she'd broken Russian codes during Project Venona. 'If
this woman breaks my brother's heart, she'll have me to answer to.'
And they called women the weaker sex.
I turned my attention back to the conversation.
"Your uncle always was a cool customer!"
"The
"Anthony is a good man; one of the best." He began to speak of
his earliest days at State, when Anthony Sebring II had taken a young law clerk
under his wing and began grooming him to become undersecretary, and the meal
passed pleasantly.
However, I was no clearer as to why I'd been called in to State today.
After a dessert of lemon mousse in an edible chocolate cup, he touched
his napkin to his mouth and rose from the table. I followed suit.
"Well, I imagine I've bent your ear enough, Clayton." We
walked out of the dining room and back to his office. "It was kind of you
to come in and join me for lunch, especially after returning so recently from
the
"Excuse me, sir, but I thought you had requested me to come in to
clear the paperwork on my desk?" I worried my lip. No one outside my
department was supposed to be aware of that mission.
"Why would I do that? There are plenty of young men, and young
women, if it comes to that, who are more than capable of entering those
reports."
Why, indeed? "Perhaps I misunderstood."
"From where did you get those instructions?"
I gave a quick glance around the crowded corridor. "Where do you
think, sir?"
"Like that, is it? If I recall correctly, your caller, who I'll
allow to be nameless for the time being, was also responsible for the fact that
the rescue of you and other members of the Intelligence community this past
spring was thanks to the efforts of the DSD and not the CIA."
"I wasn't aware that was known by any other than Director Watts,
Admiral Chegwidden, and Director Wallace."
"Information has a way of leaking out, my boy." He gave me a
shrewd look. "You're too much the son of your parents not to get to the
bottom of this. I have no doubt that you will."
I said something noncommittal, and we shook hands. "It was good
seeing you again, sir."
I returned to my office.
"Oh, Mr. Webb, the Lexus dealership called." Ms. Copeland
picked up a yellow post-it. "Your vehicle needs an oil filter, but they're
out of the ones for your model. They're having one flown down from their
And there were no rental agencies either? I was too tired to give more
than a passing thought as to what the fuck was going on.
"All right." I could take a cab to Raphael's after work, then
have
I went into my office and shut the door. The number of files remaining
on my desk seemed greatly reduced. I sat down and turned on my computer, and
while I waited for it to warm up, I checked my cell phone for messages.
There were two.
"I can't make it tonight. Sorry."
What… ? For a second, I couldn't catch my breath.
The other message was from Mother. "I'm going house-hunting with
I was abashed at how quickly I'd been ready to think Palmer would throw
me over.
"It's a condo in Aspen Reach, listed by Francesca Dashwood,
Allison's sister-in-law. Allison asked me to send some business her way."
Mother would do it as a favor to the woman who had been a sorority
sister and her matron-of-honor, as well as my godmother.
"
I dialed Markov's cell phone.
"Clay! How was your trip?" Markov would know about it – he'd
been FBI before he left to become Mother's butler cum bodyguard.
"A complete waste of time. I'd rather not talk about it, if you
don't mind."
"Of course. Will you be joining us for dinner tonight? Oh, wait. I
forgot. It's Friday." He sounded disgruntled.
"As a matter of fact, I will be joining you, if you'll be kind
enough to pick me up at State. I need a ride."
"What's the matter with the Lexus?"
"Nothing. It's in for an oil change and a tune-up."
"Didn't you just have that done? Damned imports. Okay, I'll pick
you up – when?"
"About 4:30?"
"Good. That should get us home in time for me to make something…
special for dinner."
"Whatever you'll be making, you'll have to make sure it's enough
for four."
"I know. Your mother told me we'd be having a guest." He
sneered the word. "I don't know how you can trust that man, Clay!"
"He saved my life, Gregor."
"So buy him something as a token of your gratitude."
"I think I owe him something more than monetary remuneration, don't
you?"
"Maybe, but I just hope you don't give him your heart!"
"*What*?"
"Shit! Pretend you didn't hear me say something so stupid! I'll see
you at
For a second, I couldn't catch my breath. I'd never worried about
giving away my heart – I'd had my one true love back when I was fifteen, and
he'd spurned me, and since Webbs and Sebrings only loved once, that had been my
chance at the brass ring, the golden ticket. When Palmer came into my life and
eventually my bed, that was the last thing that had crossed my mind.
The phone on my desk buzzed, providing a welcome distraction. "You
have another meeting, Mr. Webb."
****
At
I opened the passenger door, got into the front seat, and waited for him
to say something about our previous conversation.
"You're looking tired, Clay."
"Good afternoon to you too, Gregor," I said dryly. Apparently
he had as little desire to bring it up as I did.
He scowled at me, waited until I buckled up, then eased the car away
from the curb. "What's the story with
"That was supposed to be classified."
He snorted. "I might not have been CIA, but I was a damned good FBI
agent."
"Everyone seems to know I was in
"Hmmm. It sounds as if there was a leak."
"Possibly."
"But there's something else bothering you."
"There was a message from Watts on my machine when I got home this
morning, telling me the Undersecretary had requested me to come in to State
today, ostensibly to clean up some paperwork."
"But?"
"But when I got there, the Undersecretary knew nothing about it. He
said it could have been dealt with by anyone in State."
"Hmmm."
"Yes."
"And that trip to
"Yes."
"And this isn't the first wild goose chase he's sent you on."
I leaned my head back against the headrest. "No."
"Sounds to me like general pissiness on the Director's part."
I had to laugh at that, but it did sound passive-aggressive, now that I
thought about it. "But why? That's the epitome of unprofessionalism."
"If I recall correctly, he's had a wild hair up his ass since that
FUBAR in
"But Mother was going to have someone come looking for me anyway.
Benjamin Monroe, if I recall correctly."
"Yes. However,
"Still… "
"Clay, Palmer stuck his nose where it wasn't wanted. Or
needed."
"But if Palmer hadn't stepped in… " I was trying to be
reasonable, but I found it difficult. I should have known he wouldn't pass up an
opportunity to snipe at
"Yes, well, *I* do! You're the son of Neville and Porter
Webb. You'd have gotten yourself out!"
"No, Gregor, I'd be dead now," I reiterated, and I could hear
him grind his teeth. "Palmer's a good man, and I… like him." I hoped
he hadn't noticed the minute hesitation.
"You're infatuated with him."
"I'm not fifteen any more." When it had been time to go home
from the wine country of
'I won't tell you no one dies of a broken heart, Clay.' Gregor had sat
beside me, his arm around my shoulders.
'But no one does?'
'No one does.' He rubbed my arm, his attempt at being reassuring, and
surprisingly, it did help. 'And one day you'll look back on this time with
fondness, and if there's any regret, it will simply be that you wasted a moment
of time grieving over him.'
He took his eyes from the road for a second to meet mine, then shook his
head and seemed to deflate. "And you're not going to stop seeing him just
because I happen to think he's wrong for you."
"I'm not fifteen, Gregor," I said once again.
"No, you're not."
"And I know what I'm doing."
"Do you?"
"This is my life, Gregor."
"All right. But I should have shot him before I let him step one
foot into your mother's house."
"You didn't know it was him."
"Don't remind me. Who'd have thought he would do something so
unpredictable." He snorted. "What am I saying? Palmer's middle name is
unpredictable!"
I laughed, but leaned forward to turn on the radio. The station was a
classical one that Mother favored, and Debussy's Clair de Lune filled the car.
Gregor took the hint and concentrated on driving us to
"I've got some plump, fresh shrimp that will make a nice
scampi," he said as we entered the house.
"That calls for garlic, if I recall."
"Yeah. A lot of it." He grinned, and in spite of his best
attempt to appear innocent, that grin was evil, but I couldn't prevent myself
from smiling back at him. "Why don't you go up to your room and lie down
for a while?"
"You know I won't be able to fall asleep."
"Try anyway."
"Yes, Papa."
"Go!"
I went up the stairs to the suite of rooms that had been mine since
before I'd entered Phillips Exeter.
The room was spotless, not a speck of dust on the furniture, not a
wrinkle in the curtains or bedspread that Mother had changed seasonally, even
though I was no longer living there.
On one wall were framed photos of the horses I had ridden. Darling, my
first pony, Jack Be Nimble and Quasimodo, the horses I would have taken to
Trophies and blue ribbons from show jumping and dressage competitions
were in a cabinet that my father and I had built together when I was nine. It
wasn't perfect, but I treasured it. I smiled. I'd heard some choice words when
he'd slipped with the hammer and hit his thumb, and he'd made me promise not to
repeat them in front of Mother.
On the opposite wall was a bookcase that held classics such as The
Hunchback of Notre Dame, The Count of Monte Cristo, and A Tale of Two Cities.
Beside the bookcase was a pair of crossed dueling swords. I thought
briefly of the sword
I removed my suit jacket and loosened my tie, and went into the bathroom
to freshen up. I didn't bother lying down. The occasional nightmare I'd been
having had escalated over the past week to the point where I was reluctant to
even try to sleep; I knew that had contributed to my exhaustion.
I crossed to the bookcase and took down a book. There was a window seat
fitted in the bay window that overlooked the back lawn, and I made myself
comfortable on the padded cushions. I began to leaf through The Three
Musketeers.
My eyes grew heavy, the words blurred, and before I realized it, I had
dozed off.
~~~~
I sat in a corner of the cell, my arms wrapped around my knees, trying
to conserve what body heat I could. The cold and damp had seeped into my bones,
and I shivered uncontrollably. A heavy chain shackled me to the wall. It had
started to rub my ankle raw, and I no longer paced the confines of my cell.
I'd lost track of time, had no idea how long I'd been imprisoned in this
place. I was starting to believe that I was destined to die here.
Had they forgotten me, the people for whom I worked?
When I heard the key in the lock, I looked up, expecting to see Max, the
little Frenchman who had been caring for me in between beatings administered by
Etienne and Gaston, henchmen of the madman who'd had me kidnapped.
Instead, it was the dastardly duo themselves.
Rather than have them think I was intimidated by them, I hauled myself
to my feet.
"That time again, is it, boys?"
Gaston glared at me. Then his expression shifted to a combination of sly
and lecherous. He spoke to me in French. "M. l'Administrateur has a visitor
who is most desirous of … " His
leer became even more pronounced. "… having you on your knees before
him."
"I kneel to no man."
"You fool! You will kneel to Clark Palmer!"
"Palmer?" My heart gave a stutter.
"Ah. You know the man. I look forward to seeing him fuck that
pretty mouth of yours."
"In your dreams, cochon!"
A hard flush colored his cheeks, and he backhanded me. I rolled with it,
otherwise he could have easily fractured my cheekbone.
"'Tienne," he snarled, "free him."
"Gaston… " The larger man seemed uneasy. "I do not
think… "
"That is your trouble, imbécile! You do not think! Do what I say!"
"Bien sur." Etienne's tone was resentful, but he
obeyed him.
They dragged me down the long, dim corridor, Gaston
muttering in detail what Palmer intended to do to me. Sodomy, both oral and
anal, featured greatly in it.
"And once this Clark Palmer is done with you, then it
will be our turn, eh, 'Tienne?"
But I knew that escape and retribution were in the offing.
Palmer, my lover, was here to rescue me.
I'd been in the White Room before, had been drugged and
beaten there, and I couldn't prevent a shudder as the two shoved me through the
doorway, but I was ready to put on the performance of a lifetime.
"Ah, Mr. Webb," the Administrator murmured,
"you're here just in time to say au 'voir to Mr. Palmer."
"I should have known you'd be behind this… " I
started to growl, but then I caught sight of him, and the words caught in my
throat.
This wasn't how it was supposed to be.
Battered, broken, bloody –
"No!"
"Yes, Mr. Webb!"
A shot rang out, reverberating in the confines of the room,
there was a sodden thud, and my body flinched as if it had taken the bullet.
"No! He can't be dead!"
"Oh, but he is, Mr. Webb."
I went to him, one faltering step at a time, like an
marionette whose strings were sliced through, and dropped to my knees. I
gathered his lifeless body in my arms and cradled his ruined head. Blood soaked
into my sleeve.
"Such a disappointment, I'm afraid. His weakness for
you, you see, Mr. Webb. He was no longer the perfect killing machine." He
grinned at me, the expression in his eyes showing he had parted complete company
with sanity. "And now I'll shoot you."
He pointed the gun at me. In a matter of moments I would be
dead. I thought fleetingly of Mother, of my uncles, of friends who would mourn
my passing, but I was uncaring. My lover was already dead.
I watched as the Administrator's finger tightened on the
trigger.
The gun fired and…
~~~~
I jerked upright, lost my balance, and slid off the window
seat onto the floor. My stomach heaved, and I scrabbled to my feet and bolted
into the bathroom, emptying my stomach of the lunch Samuel had worked so hard to
create.
I leaned against the commode and shuddered. It had only
been a nightmare.
'Only.' I gave a short laugh. That nightmare had been
haunting me for weeks now, growing increasingly more violent, until now, in
every one, Clark Palmer was killed.
Finally, I rose to my feet, splashed water on my face, and
rinsed out my mouth. Under control once more, I tidied my appearance and
returned to the bedroom, put on my jacket, and went downstairs.
Markov gave me a sharp look, but all he asked was, "Were
you able to catch forty winks?"
"You know I'm good for nothing if I try to take a nap."
"I didn't ask you that."
I gave a huff. "No, you didn't." Stubbornly, I refused to
answer. What good would telling him about the nightmare do?
"You look like shit, Clay, and your mother is not going to be happy
with me."
"You're not my nursemaid, Gregor."
"No. But I'm your friend."
"Then be my friend, and please don't nag."
His eyebrow climbed toward his hairline. "Yes, *sir*!"
"Asshole." But it was muttered softly under my breath so he
wouldn't hear. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt him. "Gregor…
"
"Never mind. They're here."
"How do you know?"
"I heard the car pull into the drive."
I opened the front door and stepped onto the steps just as the car
pulled into the drive. Mother got out, and I hurried across the lawn to greet
her.
"You're looking tired, sweetheart."
"I'm very glad it's Friday, Mother. It's been a long week. I was at
State today." I couldn't take my eyes off
Mother was aware of all of that. There was concern in her eyes.
"Mrs. Webb!" Markov's hands were fisted on his hips.
"I'm coming, Markov." Mother took my hand, and I gave her what
I hoped was a reassuring smile. She must have accepted it, because she let me go
and turned to join Markov on the steps.
"Mother's message also let me know she was going house-hunting with
you. What did you think of Aspen Reach?"
"The community is okay." He fell into step beside me, and we walked
toward the house.
"Only okay? What about the condo?"
"Barring any unforeseen difficulties – and I don't think there
will be any, they're getting desperate to unload it – it's mine." He was
in a very good mood.
Mother paused, looked over her shoulder. "Goodness knows Francesca
worked hard enough to sell it. And that isn't all she was selling."
She smiled grimly, climbed the steps, and disappeared into the house.
"*Francesca*?" I stopped dead. Was that why he was in
such a good mood? Was he becoming interested in this woman?
And then he did. He stopped and looked back at me. "Clay?"
"Should I be jealous?" I didn't wait to hear what he had to
say. I'd been tortured by nightmares, and he'd been screwing around.
"She isn't my type, Webb."
I ignored him and went into the house. He was right behind me, and he
pinched my ass. When I turned to glare at him, he grinned at me.
"Unless she's hiding them behind blue contacts, she doesn't have
hazel eyes."
"And you mean to say that if she did, you'd find her…
interesting?"
His jaw dropped. "Clay, what…" Now he was concerned?
"Well, if you want to fuck her, don't let me stop you,
Palmer." I brushed my hair out of my eyes and gave him a cool look. Webbs
did not reveal to anyone the fact that they were bleeding inside. I started to
walk away from him.
"Are you kidding?" He grabbed my arm, jerking me to a halt.
"You think I'd do something like that to you?"
"Why not? You're…" Before I could tell him that he was free
and over 21, he pulled me against him and slammed his mouth onto mine.
I could have freed myself easily. He may have been DSD, but I came from
a long line of officers, agents, and spies. I could have taken him. If that had
been what I'd wanted to do.
But I didn't want to do that. I sighed into his mouth and leaned into
him.
"Webb, what the fuck is up?"
"I just needed to know… " That I wasn't setting myself up
for a fall. "I'm sorry. It's been a bitch of a day, ending an all-time
bitch of a week."
"You're gonna do that one time too often, and then…"
"You're going to leave me?" Oh, that was very smart, Webb. Why
not just come right out and tell the man you've got it bad for him?
"No. CIA idiot. I'm gonna knock you on your ass."
"You've already knocked me on my ass."
"I have?"
"Didn't you know?" What was the point in trying to deny what I
felt for him. He was Palmer. He'd probably already figured it out, and since he
wasn't laughing his ass off, maybe … I kissed him and whispered against his
lips, "I'm disappointed in you."
"Damned spook. Come on. Markov will think I'm molesting you."
"Speaking of which…"
"Molesting you?"
"Smart ass. No. Markov. He drove me here." I thought of my
Lexus, in the shop and with no available transportation. It wasn't a big deal,
but it was annoying. "I don't have my car, and I'm going to need a ride
home."
"No problem. I'll drive you back to your townhouse."
"I knew I could count on you."
"Want to stop and check out my place on the way back?"
It took me a second to realize what he was talking about. "Oh, your
condo?"
"Yeah." There was pride in that one word.
"Clayton!" Mrs. Webb called from the dining room. "
****
After dinner, we had coffee in the small parlor at the back of the
house.
"Sweetheart, you look so tired."
"I'll be fine, Mother. I just need a solid night's sleep."
"In that case I think you've had enough coffee, Clay." Palmer
could be a pain-in-the-ass, but since he was a live pain-in-the-ass, I let him
take my cup.
"Pushy so-and-so," I muttered loudly enough for him to hear
me. I didn't want him to think he could run my life. He grinned and winked at
me.
I studied him as he took Mother's cup as well and walked out of the
room, an easy confidence in his
stride. There was no trace of the hopeless despair of my nightmare.
But then, I was no longer asleep.
"Clayton, I'm serious about you looking tired." Mother's
words brought me back to the small parlor.
"That seems to be the general consensus. However, I left word at
both State and
"Perhaps we should call off our Sunday ride."
"I'm not an invalid, Mother."
"No one said you were, Clay."
I opened my mouth to tell them I was quite capable of taking care of
myself, but Clark gave me a look and closed his hand over my arm.
"C'mon, tough guy. I'll drive you home."
I would have protested, but I had no ride. "Fine," I muttered.
I refused to be embarrassed by the petulant tone.
I followed him out to the car and let him open the passenger door for
me, but when he would have buckled my seatbelt, I slapped his hands away and
glared at him. "I'm not a child, Palmer!"
"That's a damn good thing, baby. What I have in mind for you would
get me arrested if you were."
"Ha, ha."
He leaned down and kissed me, then straightened and shut the door. Once
he was behind the wheel, I opened my mouth to take him to task for kissing me in
front of my mother's house, where any of her neighbors could have seen.
"No one's around, baby. Do you think I didn't check? Now wave
goodbye to your mother, Clay." And he grinned and put the car in gear.
****
The rhythm of the tires on the pavement was almost hypnotic, and if he
talked on the drive home, I was too drowsy to hear. He parked and came around to
my side, opening the door for me again.
"Hey." Still more asleep than awake, I gazed up and down the street. We were in front of his apartment building. "This is your place, not mine!"
"So?"
'You're a devious bastard, Palmer."
"Yeah, and you like me that way."
I did.
"Come on." We went into the building. My eyes slid shut for
just a second. "Sit, baby."
I blinked and looked around. Somehow he'd got me up to his apartment,
and had me stripped down to my shorts and undershirt and in his bed.
"You can fight with me in the morning. You need to sleep now."
"I don't want to fight with you."
"Oh, yeah? You could have fooled me."
"You liked 'Cesca."
"Who?"
"The real estate woman. Was she pretty?"
"Oh, her. No."
He didn't remember who she was, and he didn't think she was pretty. That
made me feel good. But I didn't want him to think I was jealous. "Not
jealous, y'know."
"No, I can see that." There was amusement in his voice.
"Clay, I like you..."
"Like you too."
"I would never give you a reason to be jealous."
"Never say never. Just... tell me first."
"Okay, baby. I would, but I really don't have room in my life for
more than one person."
"That sounds good. Thought we were going to stop at Aspen
Reach." A yawn caught me unaware. "I'm sorry, babe."
"It's okay. What's the point in showing… "
It was becoming hard to make out his words. "Excuse me?" I
blinked and tried to focus on his face.
"Go to sleep, baby."
The pillow was so soft, and that order was so easy to obey. He settled
the covers over my shoulders, and I felt him drop a kiss on my jaw.
The bed dipped, and I knew he had joined me in bed. I sought his warmth,
and his arms came around me.
"'S nice," I mumbled, and fell back to sleep.
And for once, I didn't worry about the nightmares.
~End~