Title: The Nearness of You
Author/pseudonym: Tinnean
Fandom: The Sentinel
Pairing: Jim/Blair
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: Last time I looked, they still belonged
to Petfly. Which is why that was the last time I looked.
Status: new/complete
Date: 2/02
Series/Sequel: no
Summary: In spring, when a young man’s fancy
lightly turns to thoughts of love, Blair Sandburg meets someone who challenges
his belief that he is not a candidate for a long-term relationship.
Warnings: AU, m/m, language
Notes: ### Indicates a change of POV. Buegged, if I
recall correctly, belongs to the charming and always lovely Soupy Sales. This
first appeared in the MME zine, The Many Seasons of Love. This
is dedicated to the wonderful ladies of MME who constantly awe and amaze me, and
to Rayden in hopes the sun will come out tomorrow. Major thanks to Patt for
suggesting this story could go in the zine, and to Gail for the fantastic beta.
The Nearness of You
Part
1/1
It was spring, the season of weddings.
I looked at the invitation in my hand. Naomi was getting
married again. This made, what? Six… no, seven times. And none of them
had been my father.
Whenever I asked Naomi about him, she’d get this faraway
look in her eyes. Then she’d laugh and mention Timothy Leary. I could never
tell if she was serious or not.
I knew I wasn’t the best candidate in the world for a
long-term relationship, but more than anything in the world, that’s what I
wanted.
The door to the spare bedroom was ajar, and I glanced in to
see my current roommate sprawled across his bed. Cigarette smoke clung to the
clothes that were tossed casually all over the floor, as well as some cheap
perfume that caused me to wrinkle my nose.
He wasn’t bad as far as roommates went. He paid the rent
on time (mostly), didn’t bring strange girls back to the apartment (if he was
sober enough to remember I didn’t like that), and was so heterosexual I
didn’t have to worry about him making a play for one of the few, the very
few dates I brought home.
I tapped the invitation thoughtfully. If I didn’t bring a
date, I knew Naomi would drop everything, even her honeymoon, to see I was fixed
up with someone. She’d done that before, with disastrous results.
I came to a decision: I’d talk Kirk into going with me.
I’d pretend to Naomi that there was more between us than there was. And I
wouldn’t say anything to Kirk about his supposed position in my life.
If I was really lucky, by the time Naomi realized it was a
ruse, she’d be on her way to
####
Whose idea was it to get married in a restaurant, anyway?
I looked across the room at the woman my uncle, Rucker
Ellison, Sr., had just promised to love and cherish. She was smiling up at him
with impish glee. My uncle stood beside her, his mouth curved in an equally
happy grin. I almost expected to hear him shout, “Top of the world, Ma!”
My cousin, who was also Rucker, had been worried about him.
After Aunt Bette had passed away, his father had seemed headed in a downward
spiral. Now Uncle Ruck looked as if he had the secret to world peace in his
grasp.
I was pleased for my favorite uncle. Wherever he had found
Naomi Sandburg, it was obvious that she was someone who lit up his life.
I began examining the little placards that were set at the
tables. As part of the immediate family, I didn’t expect to be too far away
from the happy couple.
“Hey, Jim, how’s about a smile?” My friend, Simon
Banks, was photographing the wedding. He was a professional, who pulled down mega
bucks for an hour of his time, and this was my wedding gift to Uncle Rucker and
his bride. I pulled a face. Simon popped up from behind his camera and frowned
at me, and I stretched my lips in a faux smile. He knew I hated having my
picture taken, and after he snapped it he wandered off to do some candid shots.
I was about to reach for a small square of cardboard when
another hand collided with mine. “Sorry.” I glanced over with an apologetic
smile, to find myself snared by a pair of deep blue eyes.
“Not a problem, big guy. I’m just trying to find where
my mom put me. She’ll ignore the etiquette of wedding receptions totally and
seat me wherever she feels like it! Ah! Here I am! Blair Sandburg, son of the
bride.”
I glanced at the name on the place card beside it and
chuckled. “Looks like I’m right next to you, Blair Sandburg.” I extended
my hand. “Jim Ellison, nephew of the groom.” His hand was smooth and warm,
and I felt a tingle of electricity arrow right to my groin. Down boy! I growled
to my cock in surprise. This had not happened to me in a very long time!
“Nice to meet you, Jim.” He pulled out his chair and
sat down, looking around with curiosity. “Oh, my.”
“What is it?” I took a couple of glasses of champagne
from a passing waiter and seated myself. I handed one to Sandburg.
“Thanks, Jim. Looks like the seating arrangement got
messed up. It should have been boy, girl, boy, girl and here we are, boy,
boy.”
“‘S all right by me, Chief. That Emily Post stuff
doesn’t mean anything to me.”
He smiled, and I almost swallowed my tongue. He had the
sweetest smile. I wanted to run my tongue over it and taste it.
“Jimmy!”
I flinched. “Yes, Carolyn?”
“I didn’t get any champagne!” She pouted, then leaned
forward to smile at the bemused face on my left. “Jimmy would forget his head,
if it wasn’t attached to his shoulders! Hi, I’m Carolyn. His girlfriend!”
For a second I could have sworn he looked disappointed, but
when I blinked his expression was smoothly blank. “Nice to meet you, Carolyn.
I’m Blair.”
I flagged down a waiter and got my girlfriend her
champagne. And wondered, not for the first time what ever had possessed me to
get involved with someone whose bust size exceeded her IQ.
Carolyn’s eyes widened, and her mouth dropped open. Trust
me, an extremely vacuous expression. I turned my head to see what had captured
her attention.
Seating himself next to Blair was a blond god. My
heart sank to my shoes. There was no way I could compete with that! His
shoulders looked like they went from here to eternity. His hair was like spun
gold, and his eyes were… Christ! They were violet! You’d have thought
he was
Blair shifted away uncomfortably. “Um, Jim, this is
my…my roommate, Kirk. Kirk, this is Jim Ellison. And his date, Carolyn.”
She sat up straighter and threw her shoulders back, which
thrust her bosom out prominently. The blond’s gaze zeroed in on my
girlfriend’s breasts. I thought he would start to drool at any second.
Blair’s eyes cut to mine, and he blushed. “Kirk!” he
hissed under his breath. “That is so uncool!”
Kirk gave him what I imagine he thought was a playful poke
in the shoulder. To me it looked an awful lot like a punch. Not my
business, I warned myself. Do not reach down his throat and rip his lungs
out!
“So, Jerk, have you known Blair long?” I asked
innocently instead.
“Kirk! My name is Kirk!”
“Isn’t that what I said?”
“Oh, Jimmy! You’re so silly!” Carolyn laughed, and I
flinched. Nails on a blackboard, if you know what I mean?
Sandburg gave me a small smile, half sympathetic, half
apologetic. I wanted to ruffle his thick hair and tell him it was all right,
that if he’d ditch his date, I’d ditch mine.
There was a musical tapping of a knife on a water glass,
and silence fell over the small gathering. My brother Stephen, who had been
chosen best man because our cousin Rucker was out patrolling the coast and
hadn’t been able to make his father’s wedding, was beside our uncle.
“Ladies and gentlemen, if you’ll stand and raise your glasses? I know
we’re all hungry, so I’ll keep this short. I’d like to welcome Naomi to
our family. I hope she’ll be as happy with us as I’m sure we’ll be with
her. To Naomi and to Uncle Rucker. A long and happy life!”
There was a thundering of applause, and shouts of “A long
and happy life” offered as well. Before everyone started to guzzle he
continued. “Don’t take your seats just yet. I’d like to also introduce our
new cousin to everyone. Welcome, Blair!”
Blair gave a little bow acknowledging Stephen’s words and
held his glass high. “To Naomi and Rucker. May they live as long as they want
to, and may they want to as long as they live!” He blew his mother a kiss.
Naomi smiled broadly at him and leaned against her new husband’s arm.
“Thank you, sweetheart! I know we’re going to be one,
big happy family!”
Uncle Rucker grinned and gave Blair a thumb’s up.
“He’s a pistol, Naomi!”
The waiters began to serve the meal. My nose told me that
whatever the mystery meat was, it was safe to eat.
“Jimmy, I’m going to the little girls’ room.”
It was nice of her to share that with the entire room.
“Fine, Caro.” Her eyes lingered on the bastard who was on Blair’s other
side, and her lips parted in an alluring smile. Shortly after she left, the Jerk
muttered something about needing a change of scenery and disappeared.
Sandburg was frowning down at the food that had just been
placed before him.
“Everything all right, Chief?”
His expression was concerned. “Sure, Jim. I was just
trying to figure out what this is supposed to be.” He poked cautiously at the
meat that swimming in a pool of gravy in his dish.
I was startled to discover he didn’t even realize he had
been abandoned.
****
The cake had been sliced and the coffee served, and it was
time for the bride and groom to slip away. “Naomi, I’m so glad you’re a
part of this family.” I kissed her cheek. “Have a good time in
Blair popped up from his seat and caught his mother up in
an exuberant hug. “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do, Naomi!”
“That is so not likely, Blair!” She mimicked his
speech, then chuckled indulgently and bussed him right on the lips.
I suddenly wished I had the right to do that, kiss him in
front of God and everyone.
Rucker watched his bride lasciviously. “We’d better
hurry, sugar buns!” He all but dragged her away.
The man beside me gazed after the departing couple
wistfully, then he shook himself out of his reverie. “Well, it’s been really
nice meeting you, Jim.”
“Same here, Chief. Don’t be a stranger. You’re family
now.”
“Naomi’s been all the family I’ve had in a very long
time. It will be nice to have someone else.”
I wanted to say, “Oh, please, have me!” but instead I
looked around. “I wonder where Caro is. I haven’t seen her in a while.”
“I haven’t seen Kirk either. Um, do you mind if I hang
out with you for a bit? There’s
nowhere I have to be right now.”
“Thanks, Chief.” I tried to stay cool. “I hate
drinking alone.” We went out to the lounge and ordered a couple of beers.
There was a game on the screen above the bar, but we ignored it for the most
part and chatted.
He told me his middle name was Jacob, for which he’d be
eternally grateful. Otherwise he would have been destined to go through life
with the initials BS.
I learned he liked to change jobs every two years. He had
been a teaching assistant, an anthropologist, a cop. Right now he was teaching
ballroom dancing. He had about three months left to go on this job.
“What about you, Jim?”
“Nothing so interesting. After a stint in the army, I
took the job I have now. I’m personal private assistant to the CEO of a major
corporation. I’ve worked for the same man for sixteen years.” I stared into
space, suddenly realizing I had spent forty per cent of my life at this job.
“You must think that is so boring!”
“No, Jim, I…uh… think that’s…” Sandburg was at
a loss, and I gave a small huff of laughter.
“Boring,” I insisted.
He chuckled softly and I found my libido sitting up and
taking notice. I was amazed. For the last couple of dates with Carolyn, I’d
had to search desperately for excuses why I wasn’t going to boink her. She was
starting to believe that I really did respect her too much to do that! But now,
with this intriguing package of energy, my cock was so hard that if he gave me
the slightest encouragement, I’d have bent over the bar for him.
I suddenly found myself telling him something I had never
mentioned to anyone else. “A couple of years ago,” I was astonished to hear
myself say, “I got so depressed that I spent six months planning to kill
myself.”
“What?” The other patrons of the bar glanced at
us curiously, and Blair lowered his voice. “What?”
“Yeah. I really researched it. When I finally decided the
best way to do it, I rehearsed it. I went over it in my mind, again, and again,
and again.”
“Well, obviously you didn’t go through with it. Mind if
I ask what happened to make you rethink suicide?”
“The long and the short of it, Chief? I rehearsed it to
death: I got bored.” I finished my beer and caught the bartender’s eye.
“Want another one, Sandburg?”
We sipped our beers. The game finished, and the
As if on cue, “Jimmy! Here I am!” Carolyn stood in the
doorway, waving to catch my attention. Behind her stood the tall, blond god.
“No, Blair. I wasn’t worried. I saw her leave with
…someone.” I thought I did a good job of keeping the disillusion out of my
voice, but I was wrong.
“Oh, wow, man, I am so sorry!” It was a thread of
sound, but I had no problem hearing his whisper.
“Hey! Jimbo! Caro just wanted me to see the nursery where
she works. She’s a horticulturist, you know!”
“I know, Kirk. She’s my girlfriend.”
He was put out by my tone. “What?” he asked sullenly.
“Nothing, Kirk. It’s just really late. It took you that
long to drive five miles?”
Carolyn giggled, and I caught a whiff of alcohol. “Oh, we
ran out of gas!”
“That’s a pretty sucky thing to do, man!” Blair
bristled. “You could have called!”
“Fuck off, Sandburg!”
I couldn’t stand it. So I knocked him down.
Sandburg stared at me with huge eyes. I thought for a
moment he was going to tear into me, for denting his lover’s face. Instead, a
grin split his face. “Wow! Way cool, man!”
I realized I was missing something here.
We watched as the Jerk got to his feet. “This is
bullshit, Sandburg! I’ve had it with you! I am so moving out!” He
shook himself off, and stalked sulkily out of the restaurant.
“Carolyn…” My mouth dropped open as I watched her
hurrying after the blond. “… are you ready to go?” I finished lamely.
“Oh, fuck! Looks like we’ve been abandoned, Chief.”
Blair stood there staring after them. He had just been
broken up with in the middle of a restaurant’s lounge.
Yeah. To quote the kid, ‘way cool’! He was available
again. I wrestled my expression to something resembling somber empathy, while
inside I was doing a snoopy dance. I dared to slide my arm around his shoulder
and urged him out of the restaurant.
Once in the parking lot we heard the sound of an engine
revving, and as a sporty little car zipped away, its driver flipped us the bird.
I paused beside my ’69 pick-up. “I think you’re going to need a lift,
Blair.”
His smile was a little lopsided. “Thanks, man. I’m
sorry about …”
“No. It’s fine. Really.”
Blair’s tongue swept over his lips. “Really?” he
said, his voice rising just a bit. My own tongue came out to do the lip thing,
too. I felt myself leaning in toward him, but then he rushed on. “I mean…
Kirk’s my roommate, but he really isn’t my boyfriend. I just…I didn’t
want Naomi to think I didn’t have anyone to bring to her wedding.” He
sighed, and I wanted to swallow that soft sound.
I pulled my keys out instead and unlocked the passenger
door. The Jerk wasn’t his boyfriend? Better and better!
“Hop in, Chief.”
####
I shouldn’t call him. I mean, I
didn’t know much about him.
Well, I did know that he’d had
the same job for sixteen years. He’d been suicidal for six months but didn’t
act on it because he got bored. He’d been in the army. And man, did he look
good!
And I kept remembering the way he
watched my lips. When I get nervous, I have this tendency to lick them, see? And
that last time, I was positive I was going to get kissed.
No such luck.
Then I remembered he had a
girlfriend. Well, he had a girlfriend, until that asshole Kirk put the
moves on her.
Hey, that was an idea; I could
call to apologize for that whole fiasco. It wasn’t my fault, but that was as
good an excuse as any!
My hand was reaching out to pick
up the receiver and make that call, when the phone rang, startling me out of a
year’s growth. And let’s face it, I couldn’t afford that! I was already on
the short side!
It was Naomi, home from her
honeymoon and calling to see if I was free on the weekend.
She had decided the best thing for bringing the two
families together was for us to all gather at the big house she and Uncle Rucker
were remodeling and look at the proofs of the wedding. Jim’s friend, Simon,
had made sure they were developed in time for the happy couple’s return from
The new Mrs. Ellison had two six foot heroes laid out on
the dining room table, along with potato and macaroni salads and cole slaw, and
we were to eat buffet style. I couldn’t help but notice she was looking
decidedly satisfied.
“Blair! Sweetheart! You’re looking…awful! Darling,
what’s wrong?” Trust Naomi to pick up on the little nuances. She wasn’t
the most maternal of moms, but she did love me.
“Kirk moved out, Naomi.” That was as good an excuse as
any. If I told her I had the hots for her brand new husband’s nephew, she’d
do her damnedest to see we got together. And then when we broke up, she’d
never let me hear the end of it.
No, I was going to love and lose Jim Ellison all on my own.
Not love love him, you understand. I mean, with Naomi as an example, and
with my own less than stellar track record, I knew better than to hope for
happily ever after.
And I knew I would lose him sooner or later. I could accept
that. I’d treat it like a new job. Only my jobs lasted longer than my
relationships.
“I’m so sorry, sweetie. Will you be all right?”
“Sure, Naomi. You know me. Rubber balls have nothing on
me!” I always bounced back. Fortunately, her husband chose that moment to
approach us. “Hi, Rucker.”
“Hiya, son!” Rucker looked like the cat who swallowed
the cream. He was a little flushed and sweaty, having been out in the backyard
breaking ground on a swimming pool. It was his intention to do the whole thing
himself. Unless, of course, he could convince the other males in the family to
give him a hand. When he informed us of this, we all applauded him and politely
declined.
“Naomi! Rucker!” Jim Ellison strolled in, followed
closely by his brother, Stephen.
Their smiles as they greeted him were happy. So was mine. I
had been hoping Jim would show up, although I hadn’t realized how much until I
heard his voice.
“Jim!” Naomi rubbed his upper arm affectionately. “We
can’t thank you enough for your thoughtful gift! This is going to be so
excellent, having the family here to see our wedding pictures!”
“It’s my pleasure, Naomi. I hope they came out well!”
Rucker reached over and hauled Jim into a massive hug.”
It’s about time you two got here! Maybe we can get this show on the road now,
what do you say, honey buns? There are a million things we could be doing.”
The look he slid over his wife’s body made it all too clear what those million
things entailed.
Naomi’s eyes glinted, and she licked her lips. “Very
well, Slick. If you gentlemen would be so kind? Stephen said he would load up
the slide tray. It will be easier to make our selections from the slides, I
think.”
We took our seats in the family room. Naomi and Rucker
chose the loveseat, and were so close together there was room to spare. I sat at
the end of the couch, hoping Jim might choose to sit beside me. He went over to
speak with his brother, and my shoulders drooped.
“Hey.” I looked up at the soft voice. “This seat
taken, Chief?” He held two plates piled high with food.
I shook my head, accepting a plate, then shifted and
crossed my legs, trying to disguise my arousal. There was plenty of room on that
couch, but he sat so close to me that his thigh pressed up against my thigh, and
his shoulder brushed against mine. He turned to say something to his brother,
and his hand was suddenly on my knee, squeezing and fondling it. I wanted to
spread my legs. If I did, maybe he’d move his hand higher. An almost soundless
whimper escaped my mouth, and his fingers tightened as if he heard me.
I battled my lust to a standstill and settled down to enjoy
the pictures of my mother’s latest wedding, and the warmth of the man at my
side. Stephen dimmed the lights and started the projector.
The slides consisted of the usual shots of the bride and
groom toasting each other, sharing a bite of cake, kissing ... oh, yes, kissing!
And then came a series of candid pictures. There was a
muffled gasp, and Jim choked on a bite of potato salad. The first time Simon had
told him to say Parmesan, he’d stuck out his tongue and crossed his eyes. And
Simon had snapped a picture of him like that!
And he had somehow managed to get a shot of Jim’s brother
pissing in a potted plant, and a dignified matronly figure puking in someone’s
pocketbook.
“Wow!” My voice was tinged with stifled amusement.
“That’s…amazing, man!”
Naomi was poking her husband’s arm. “Isn’t this a
hoot, Rucker?”
“I may have to give Simon a bonus for that! You realize
I’m going to torment you with that picture for the rest of your life, don’t
you, Stephen?”
He groaned. “Don’t remind me! I had the world’s worst
hangover the next day! Oh, shit!”
I felt myself turn pale. The next image was of Kirk in a
corner of the cloakroom. He had been caught in the act of pulling out his cock,
while Jim’s erstwhile girlfriend was leaning back against the wall, holding
her skirt high enough to reveal the fact that she was not a natural redhead.
“Well.” He blew out a breath, and shrugged. “Well. I
guess it’s a good thing she decided to break up with me. Know anyone who might
be interested in a slightly worn personal private assistant, Chief?”
I had to grip the edge of the couch, otherwise I’d have
been bouncing up and down, pleading, ‘Me, me, me!’
“Oh, baby!” Naomi wailed. “That bastard broke your
heart!”
“Uh…”
“My poor Blair! I’m going to get a gun and shoot
him!”
“Uh…”
“This is all your fault! Why is it you always fall in
love with the most unsuitable men?”
Huh? How did we go from ‘poor Blair’ to ‘this
is my fault’?
“It’s all right, Naomi. Caro and I really weren’t
compatible.”
“Jim, that’s so sweet of you to say. But Blair always does
this! He always chooses the worst possible person for him! And then
everyone gets hit by the fallout!”
Could it get any more embarrassing than this, getting
chewed out by your mom in front of the man you’re head over heels in lust
with? I buried my face in my hands. And another one bites the dust.
“Naomi.” Rucker actually got her to shut up. I was
impressed. It was too late, but I was impressed.
“I’d better go. I’ll…I’ll call you, Naomi. Jim,
I’m really sorry.”
“It’s not a problem, Chief,” he said softly, and I
dared to look into his ice blue eyes. They were warm, and I caught my breath.
Cautiously I rested my palm on his thigh and rubbed the
rock-hard muscle. I was concentrating on the movement of my hand, and when
Jim’s hand came to rest on mine, halting it, I jumped.
I licked my lips. I told you I do that when I get nervous,
didn’t I?
“Let’s blow this popsicle stand, Chief!” He dragged
me to my feet, and the plate of sandwich and potato salad tipped onto the floor.
“Naomi, thanks for a lovely afternoon. Uncle Rucker, call me when you need
some help on that pool; you’ll give yourself a heart attack otherwise.
Stephen…I’m definitely going to have Simon give me a copy of that
picture!”
We were out the door before I realized it. “Where…where
are we going?”
“How about my place? I’ve got a cappuccino maker that I
haven’t tried yet.”
“Sounds great to me, big guy.”
“Would you mind driving? I didn’t bring the pick-up.”
I waved him toward my car and watched the bunch and flow of
the muscles of his ass. What that man did to a pair of jeans was, as they say in
some circles, nobody’s business! I hurried after him and opened the passenger
door of the Volvo, then waited until Jim got in. I walked around to the
driver’s side and slid behind the wheel.
I fastened my seat belt and glanced at the man sitting next
to me. He hadn’t buckled up. I unbuckled, leaned across him to get the
shoulder harness and pulled it across his chest. Heat radiated off him, and I
couldn’t help noticing the bulge just centimeters away from my fingers. I
looked into his eyes, and…
Yeah, you got it…I licked my lips. And then I said to
myself, fuck it! I leaned up and kissed him.
Warm. Soft. Moist. Lush. Lips that should be declared
illegal in the forty-eight contiguous states,
I was going to be cool about this. I was not going to dive
past his lips like I was a man forty days in the desert and desperate for the
life spring that was his mouth. But then he opened his mouth and flicked my
tongue with his, and I moaned and shivered and wound my arms around his neck,
plastering myself against him.
His hands were hard on my hips, digging in, and from
someone else, it would have been painful, but from Jim Ellison it wasn’t
enough! Somehow I was straddling his thigh, which pressed high against my
crotch, and I started a slow rocking motion.
“Chief.”
Fuck. I’d gotten carried away. He didn’t want this! I
managed to get my mouth off his. It was a major struggle, but I did it. I was
panting and gasping and moaning, and all I wanted to do was take that mouth one
more time, just once more. I swear I’d be satisfied with that for the rest of
my life!
I wouldn’t be, not really, but if he didn’t want me, if
this was all I was destined to have, then I wanted that one last kiss!
“I’m getting off, babe, I promise!”
He laughed softly. "I kind of got the impression you
were."
“Huh?” I realized what I said and groaned in dismay.
“I think that it would be a good idea if we left now,
Chief. I haven’t made out in a car since I was a horny teenager!”
“Sorry.”
“You keep saying that. Don’t you get it yet, Blair? I’m
not! It’s flattering to be wanted this badly. Just, not in my uncle’s
driveway!” He ran his hand through my hair, catching a strand that slipped
loose of the thong I kept it confined in and tugging gently. “I want to make
love with you, Chief. Let’s go back to my loft.”
I got back to my side of the Volvo and buckled up again. A glance at Jim showed that he was still just sitting there. I gave an exasperated huff of laughter. “Fasten your seat belt, Jim, or we don’t move!”
“Excuse me?”
I put the key in the ignition and listened to the engine
rev. It would probably need a tune up soon. “I don’t drive unless all my
passengers are buckled up!”
####
By the time we got to my apartment, I was almost vibrating
from nerves. I took Blair’s jacket and hung it up next to mine, then turned to
ask him if he really wanted cappuccino. Before I knew what was happening, he had
me flush against the wall, leaning full length against me while his right hand
shaped and molded my dick.
I squeezed my eyes shut and gasped for breath. His nimble
fingers unbuttoned my fly and spread it open. He reached in. There was a small
damp spot on my shorts, and he hummed with satisfaction as he rubbed his thumb
over the head of my cock through the material. I was rocking my hips forward,
trying to get more of whatever he wanted to give me.
Blair pulled my cock out of my jeans and scraped his nail
over the slit that was oozing clear fluid. As he sank to his knees before me, he
dragged my pants down and out of the way. He licked up the drops of pre come and
blew on the tip, a warm, humid breath.
I cried out, and then cried out again as he took me into
his mouth. My fingers tangled in that long, curly hair of his, and I bucked and
groaned. I was close. I was so close!
He let me slip from his mouth. “Nooo!” I moaned.
“No,” he agreed. His blue eyes were hot as they watched
me watch him. Blair rubbed a finger over my weeping dick, coating it with pre
come. He took my cock back into his mouth, then distracted me by parting my
buttocks and stroking across my hole. This was something new, and I tensed. The
fingertips of his other hand ran the length of my thigh, soothing me. The tight
ring of muscle gradually gave beneath the steady pressure, and then his finger
was all the way in me, finding my prostate and almost causing me to levitate.
I was teetering on the brink. No one had ever loved me like
this before. Mutual jerk-offs, sure, but I’d never, ever had anything in my
ass.
Blair fumbled with his own zipper, and I was abruptly hit
by the thought that I was making him do all the work. If I wanted this to be a
shared experience that he maybe might, maybe would want to repeat, I’d
better get my ass in gear and help out a little. I pressed down on his hand, and
reluctantly he withdrew his finger. I went down onto my knees, which left my
legs spread very wide, and I wedged my hands between us and undid the button at
the top of his jeans. The sound of his zipper descending, knowing I was the one
lowering it, had me panting, and then that beautiful cock of his was freed.
Blue eyes blazed into mine, and I leaned toward him as he
released my cock and stretched forward to meet me. As our lips touched,
caressed, explored, our dicks came into contact, slick with pre come and spit,
and his hips began a gentle thrusting. His tongue mimicked the movement.
So this was frottage. I’d heard, but had never…
And then there was no time for any thoughts. My brain went
on hiatus, my body followed where my lover led. I wanted to inhale him. I wanted
him under my skin, so that no matter where I went, he was there with me.
Blair eased his finger back into me, and when I would have
moaned, he took advantage of my open mouth to plunder its moist depths. He
wrapped his hand around both our cocks, and the additional pressure was all that
was needed. I came, splattering both of us with hot semen. My lover was right
there with me, and our essences mingled. I went spinning into sensory overload,
my senses haywire. The scents, the sounds, the sensations…
****
“Jim! Jim!” He was patting my cheek urgently. “Come
back to me, man!”
My eyes drifted open, and I saw his concerned face above
me. “Hi, Chief.” I curled my hand around his neck. “Mmmm,” and I brought
him down for a soft kiss.
He stiffened his arms and kept me at a distance. “Hi? Hi?
Is that all you can say?” He scooted out from under me and my head hit the
floor. “You scared me shitless, man! What happened?”
I rubbed at the non-existent bump, hoping for a little
sympathy, but he just kept glaring at me. “What do you mean, what happened? I
came. We came!”
“And then you passed out!”
“Oh.” I shifted uncomfortably. My senses hadn’t acted
up like this in a long time. Usually I had them clamped down so tightly it often
felt as if I was going around with a layer of gauze between me and the rest of
the world. “I’m sorry, Chief.”
“Come on, big guy. Talk to me!”
I pulled my jeans up and concentrated on getting the
buttons in the buttonholes.
“Jim.”
Hesitantly I explained about my senses. “They’re all
enhanced, every fucking one of them! About eighteen months ago they came online.
Mostly I can keep them under control. I don’t understand why this happened,
but it won’t happen again!” He hadn’t bolted for the door immediately, so
I was hopeful he might stay. “I promise it won’t happen again!”
Blair scowled at me. “You’re an asshole, James
Ellison!”
“Excuse me?” Wasn’t he thankful he wouldn’t have to
put up with senses run wild?
“You’re certifiable, you know that? Do you have any
idea how it makes me feel to know I can love you right over the edge? I mean, I
don’t want you to faint every time we make love, but once in a
while…” He suddenly looked away, embarrassed. “I’m sorry. I’m a macho
dick. I want to stand on the roof and beat my chest and shout to the world that
I made you come so hard you lost consciousness.”
I’d never thought of it like that. “It doesn’t bother
you that I can see and hear things, that smell and touch are so magnified?”
“It’s part of who you are, Jim. And I really lo… like
who you are.”
“Yeah?” I knew I was wearing one of those dopey grins.
“In that case, you want to take this upstairs?”
“Oh, man! I thought you’d never ask!” He grabbed my
hand and pulled me to my feet. “I’ve been dreaming of having you, Jim!”
I slowed as we got to the top of the stairs. “There’s
just one thing, Chief.” I found it hard to meet his eyes. “I…uh…I
haven’t exactly done this before.”
For just a second he looked confused, and then his eyes
widened. I was afraid he was going to laugh at me. I mean, here I was,
thirty-five…thirty-seven… oh, all right thirty-nine, dammit, and
I’d never gone all the way with another guy. And how ‘50s did that sound?
But his expression grew tender, and my dick got so hard I
thought it would pop the buttons on my fly. His palm caressed my cheek, and his
thumb rubbed my lips gently, urging them to part. I wanted him to slide a finger
into my mouth so I could suck on it. The thought of doing that made my cock
twitch.
“I guess that means you don’t have any lube.”
“Lube?”
He brought my face close to his and kissed me softly.
“I’ll take care of you, Jim.”
Blair turned and hurried back down the stairs. “Good
thing I was hoping I’d get lucky!” He rummaged in his jacket pocket and came
running back up, holding a small white bag with a pharmacy advertisement on it.
I was already on the bed, the covers flung onto the floor.
My fingers were clumsy on the buttons of my shirt. “Have you been carrying
that around long, Chief?” I threw my shirt over the foot of the bed, for once
not caring if it wrinkled.
My lover was faster than I in spite of the fact that I’d
had a head start: he was down to his boxers. They were silk, and on the leg was
discreetly embroidered the manufacturer’s logo. His erection was tenting his
shorts, and my fingertips tingled with the need to strip him bare.
He knelt on the bed and unlaced my running shoes. I toed
them off, my breath hitching as I watched him reach for the buttons on my jeans.
Each one was pressed down, slid through, material was freed, flesh beneath was
tormented by the feather touches. My hips were thrusting into the air by the
time he was through. His grip fastened in the waistband, and he removed jeans
and shorts in one swift, efficient movement.
I couldn’t believe how ready for this we both were.
“Flip over, babe.”
I obeyed him eagerly, nervous, but wanting this more than I
could remember wanting anything. Blair petted my ass cheeks as the cool sheets
warmed to the heat of my body, and he reached for a pillow to slide beneath me.
“Kneel up, Jim.”
My buttocks were parted, and I concentrated on breathing.
And almost rocketed off the bed as I felt his tongue tease the sensitive skin
behind my balls, lick at my hole, and then stab at it, getting me so relaxed
that I felt almost boneless.
I knew I was never going to last. I grabbed a handful of
sheets. “Chief!”
“Dial it down, big guy,” Blair whispered, and explained
how he wanted me to do that. It distracted me enough so that the urge to come
was blunted.
I jumped as this time a couple of slicked fingers pushed
into me. My lover stroked my back, soothing me. The feeling of fullness was
almost overwhelming, and I shivered. Maybe this wasn’t a good idea. Maybe we
should just stick to sucking each other off. Maybe… He curled his fingers and
found that spot that had driven me crazy while he was blowing me.
Fuck maybe! I wanted more of that! I humped into his
thrusts, and suddenly his fingers were replaced by something thicker, longer.
Blair reached around to jerk me off while he fucked me. His hand was
knowledgeable on my dick, which was soon oozing drops of pre come. I squeezed my
inner muscles and rolled my hips, trying to take him deeper.
“That’s it, Jim,” he groaned, letting me know he was
aware who he was fucking. He lay on my back, and his fingers stroked over my
chest, finding my nipples and playing with them.
“Blair! I’m...”
“Yes, Jim, yes! Come for me, baby.”
With a hoarse shout I poured myself into his hand. His
thrusts became hard and rapid, and he cried out. I felt his heat deep inside me,
branding me as his.
His arms snug around me, he held me tight, murmuring
something. I dialed my hearing up enough to distinguish what he was whispering.
“I love you, Jim. I love you!”
I smiled and rubbed my cheek against his bicep. My arms and
legs were trembling from keeping us both up. I sank down to the mattress,
keeping my ass up so I’d have Blair in me for as long as possible, but finally
he was too soft to remain in my passage, and he slid out. I rolled onto my side,
feeling utterly at peace, with myself and the world.
“Hold on, Jim. I’ll be right back.” He padded down
the stairs and I could hear him in the bathroom, running the water. When he
returned, it was with a warm washcloth. Carefully, he cleaned me off, making
sure I hadn’t torn, then turned me to my back and wiped off any drying come
that had escaped his hand.
Once he was satisfied with our level of comfort, he pulled
a sheet up over us and sprawled across my chest.
I had one arm under my head, while the other rested along
my lover’s back. My hand cupped
the sweet curve of his ass, and he lifted into my petting. I stared up at the
ceiling. A spider was spinning its web. I could see each strand clearly, and the
light that fractured through it, almost like a prism.
So this was love. My chest rose on a deep sigh.
“You okay, Jim?” Blair asked drowsily.
“I’ve never been so okay, Chief. But now what?”
“Hmmm? Huh?” He had gone from sleepy, lazily
sated to awake, wild-eyed anxiety. “What do you mean, now what?”
“Well, where do we go from here?”
I could feel his tension. “Um, what are the options
we’re looking at, babe?”
It was bad of me, but I couldn’t help teasing him.
“Well,” I began ticking them off on my fingers. “We could say good-bye,
and never meet again.”
“Not an option, Jim!”
I smiled. “All right,” I said agreeably, wondering how
long I could string this out. “We could say this was nice, but maybe for
friendship’s sake, we’d better not do it again.”
“You thought it was only nice?” I didn’t need
Sentinel hearing to pick up the hurt in his voice.
“It was better than nice Chief. It was the greatest thing
since sliced bread!”
That appeased him somewhat. “Suppose I don’t want to be
your friend badly enough to give up the sex? Then what?”
I shrugged and pretended I had no idea what he was talking
about. That unappeased him.
“All right, Ellison. What else? And keep in mind you’re
getting me a tad buegged.”
“Is that some kind of Sandburgism? Buegged?”
“It’s worse than bugged, Jim. Believe me, you don’t
want to go there!”
“I’ll take your word for it, Chief. Well, we could
always be fuck buddies.” I nodded as if this was a great idea. “Yeah, that
would work. If either of us ever needed to get laid, he could turn to the other.
Sound good, Blair?”
He leaned up and looked into my eyes. “James Ellison, are
you teasing me?”
“I am.” I stole a quick kiss. “I’m sorry. But
it’s so much fun teasing you!”
“Hmph.” He tweaked my nipple. “I am so not
appreciating that, wiseguy! Okay, are there any more options? Because I’ll
tell you the truth, I am not liking any of them!” But this time the smile was
back.
“Just one more, Blair.” I took a deep breath. “Move
in with me. Grow old with me.”
He didn’t answer immediately, and I suddenly felt as if
I’d been kicked in the gut. Had his vow of love simply been the post coital
words of a satisfied male?
When he spoke, his words almost broke my heart.
“I’m…I’m not a good candidate for the long haul, Jim. You’ve seen my
mom. I love her, but she really wasn’t the best example on how to keep a
relationship going.”
“It doesn’t seem to me that she’s looking to deep-six
Uncle Rucker.”
“No, but…”
“Is it possible that maybe she could have changed?”
“Yeah, but…”
I kissed his mouth shut. “Look, Chief. I love you.”
“You do?”
“Hell, yes!”
“You didn’t say.”
I scowled at
him. “ Well, I do. That’s all there is to it, so get used to it. I’m not
letting you go.”
“You’re not?”
I shook my head.
“So I’ve got no say in this matter?”
I shook my head again.
“I can see you’re going to be a bossy, pushy bottom!”
“I guess so.” My pushy bottom was aching pleasurably,
and I wondered how soon we could do this again. “Will you, Blair Jacob
Sandburg?”
He smiled at me, a smile that lit him up like a stained
glass window. “I will.”
~End~
