I went to survival camp five years ago
when I was sixteen. It was a three-week-long
program in Idaho. My experience was
definitely a negative one in most ways. The
weird part was that I went voluntarily. I
wasn't sent by my parents. I was under the
impression that it was an outward bound type
experience. When I called the school to ask
them about the program, I told them about
myself and asked if the program was
appropriate for me and of course they said it
was perfect.
Going into the program, I knew what my
physical condition was going to be. I had to
get a waiver signed by my doctor saying that
I could physically handle hiking up to twelve
hours a day and going for up to three days
without food. I knew I'd be out there with
nothing and that I might have to eat things
like mice and snakes. I also knew I was going
to be strip searched. I can't complain about
those things because I knew about them before
I went. My issues are with the way I was
harassed and insulted and demeaned verbally
and emotionally. I also take issue with this
kind of treatment being "rehabilitative"
in any way.
Throughout the time I was there they
accused me of having eating disorders,
throwing up on purpose after they forced me
to drink a gallon of water in five minutes,
lying, and being sexually promiscuous -- none
of which were even close to being true.
The biggest problem with these programs is
that they target kids as being the source of
all the problems in society and in their
homes. It doesn't even occur to them that
violent and emotionally disturbed kids come
from violent and emotionally disturbed
parents. I, along with other kids in my group,
were stopped numerous times in the middle of
hikes to be lectured about how we were
destroying our families, and how we were
HURTING OUR PARENTS. I was told that I was
lucky that I have parents who love me and
care about me and would do anything for me
and that when everyone else was gone it was
going to be my family that was still there
for me.
1) I'm adopted. 2) I was sexually molested
by my adoptive father. 3) My adoptive mother
has tried to kill my sister and may have
tried to kill me. (I'm not sure.) I've
listened to her talk to therapists about her
desperation and how she didn't think any of
us (her or my siblings) should be here and
she was afraid of what she might do. I've sat
before in the back seat of the car while she
was in a rage, knowing that she was thinking
how easy it would be just to drive into the
middle of oncoming traffic. 4) My adoptive
mother has tried to kill herself and spent
six months in a mental institution when I was
four. At that time I was left with my
adoptive father (the one who was molesting me)
as well as a babysitter who was also abusive.
5) I spent the rest of my childhood listening
to her insult me. Threatening to put me into
foster homes, telling me I'm fat, ugly, etc.
Anything you can think of for hours every day.
My point is that it's kids with histories
like mine who end up in survival camp
programs. And if there is any "success
rate" like they claim, I'm sure it only
lasts until these kids have children of their
own and repeat the cycle. And the counselors
who run these programs are either sadistic
and have the same sicknesses my parents have,
or else they're incredibly, dangerously
ignorant. Either way, they're obviously not
qualified to deal with what a lot of these
kids have been exposed to in their lives.
Also, at the end of the three weeks one of
the counselors told me she thought I should
be held back and be kept in the program
longer because I hadn't "changed"
enough, even though I was in the program by
my own choice. That shows that they're
operating by rote and not even thinking about
what they are saying or doing.
Because I've had experiences that I feel
to be much worse than the ones at survival
camp, I don't feel like I was really
traumatized by the experience. I'm resentful
of it because it was so blatantly wrong, but
I don't have flashbacks or anything. It just
makes me think if Susan Smith hadn't drowned
her two boys she might have sent them to one
of these programs instead, years down the
road. "Maybe if her kids had been better
behaved she wouldn't have had to kill them."
That's the mindset of the people running
survival camps, which is pretty stupid.