Chapter 31 – You Are Where I Begin
August 6, 2007 3:15 AM
The sound of a car pulling into the drive was the only thing that could compel Spike to leave Buffy’s side but only after reassuring himself it would only be for the time it would take to get the alarm turned off and the door unlocked.
“I’ll be right back. Help is here,” he whispered to her, waiting until seeing acceptance in the eye that wasn’t swollen shut before taking off. She was unable to speak because it appeared that her jaw was broken. He ran down the hall and took the stairs three or four at a time using the rail for balance.
“Spike, what’s wrong?” Max asked.
Spike looked briefly toward the other man sitting on their couch, which was once again his temporary bed, before heading toward the alarm.
“It’s Buffy,” he managed to get out before pressing numbers on the alarm pad.
Max headed up the stairs without waiting for Spike as the look on the vampire’s face told him that whatever had happened to Buffy was bad. Really bad. The sight that faced him when he raced into their room almost made him sick. It looked like there wasn’t a spot on Buffy’s body that wasn’t bruised, burned or bleeding. Cautiously Max made his way to her side, “Buffy, its Max. Can you hear me?”
Her eye blinked rapidly in response to his question as he drew closer. Blood was seeping out from beneath her and carefully he moved her onto her side. Her back lay in ribbons; each cut was leaking blood as well as her bottom.
Footsteps behind him made Max turn around to see Spike returning to the room. “What the hell did you do to her?”
“I…didn’t,” Spike told him as he approached the other side of the bed. Tears had begun to run down his face as he realized that no matter how it had happened it was his irresponsibility in allowing the ritual that had caused this.
“Spike?” Raven asked softly as she stepped into the room. The sounds of the men running up and down the stairs had awoken her and she had come to find out was happening.
He turned to look at his daughter and spotted Elijah walking up behind her. “No, Elijah, don’t come in here. Raven, stop him. It will kill him.” Spike shouted in panic at the thought of Elijah picking up on what was happening to Buffy.
“I don’t feel anything.” Elijah stated from the security of Raven’s arms out in the hall.
As Max and Raven both turned to him for explanation, Spike whispered, “There’s a spell around the room keeping the sounds and feelings in here.”
“You son of a bitch,” Max exclaimed as his heart clutched still trying not to believe his friend would do this to his wife but knowing with the spell he could have tortured Buffy for hours and no one would have heard anything.
The sound of more footsteps hurrying up the stairs made everyone turn to see Kate, followed by Giles coming toward them and behind them was Willow.
Kate didn’t hesitate to ask why but hurried to Buffy’s side as she pulled on gloves. She made a cursory exam before pulling a syringe and a bottle of medicine from her bag. “I’m going to give her something for pain,” she stated and filled the syringe with morphine before administering it.
“What happened?” Giles asked.
“We did the ritual. The one she asked you about and when it was over she was like this. I’ve never seen it do this before. It looks like she has my wounds, my pain.” Spike told them hoarsely.
“These aren’t actually inflicted but from a ritual, magically induced?” Kate asked and then as Spike nodded, she turned her attention back to her patient. “Spike, did you and Buffy have anal sex tonight?” Her eye flickered up to him as she asked needing to know if that was from the ritual or was actually physically induced.
Spike looked toward the ground; embarrassed at the words he had to say, “No, Angelus, it’s part of my past.”
“I think I know what happened then. When she saw the truth of who you are and decided to accept you in spite of it, she wanted to protect you from that hurt and in turn took that pain upon herself.” Giles explained.
With his words the vampire began to sob at what she seemed to have tried to do for him and at how much she really had to love him.
“Oh my God,” Xander cried as he came through the bedroom door. Following him up the stairs was Dawn and Josh.
“Everybody out now,” Kate instructed because Buffy was beginning to deteriorate. Her heartbeat was slowing down and the family pouring through the door was wearing on her already fragile state. As everyone turned to leave she called, “Except for Willow, if magic did this then maybe magic can heal her.”
Xander turned to Spike to help lead him out, leaning down to grab a pair of his jeans from the floor on the way. Once everyone but Kate and Willow had taken up vigil in the hallway, Giles explained to the newcomers what appeared to have happened. Spike pulled on the jeans that Xander held out to him then sank on the floor with his arms wrapped around his knees.
“Did you call everyone?” Spike asked briefly looking at Giles.
“Yes, we didn’t know what had happened. Whether there was an attack again or what.”
Spike nodded before burying his head in his arms. Raven and Elijah were being held by Max, confused and hurt by what was happening. Raven kept looking at her father knowing that she should go to him but was frightened because she still wasn’t sure what had happened to Buffy. Dawn’s words made her decision.
“Are you all finally satisfied?” Dawn spat. “That eventually he is going to kill her; if he hasn’t already. Is this what you wanted, Spike? To make her less than what she is to satisfy you’re ego.”
“Dawn, stop it.” Giles said. Spike didn’t need her anger right now. He was slowly rocking back and forth on the floor while his shoulders shook from his tears. Xander came to sit beside him putting one hand on his shoulder to let him know that he wasn’t alone and not everyone blamed him.
Clem had joined them after returning from a late night return visit to Faith’s grave. Max quietly filled him on what they knew so far. Then in silence they waited. Time dragged on for what seemed forever when finally Willow popped her head out of the door. She looked around the small group with her eyes finally coming to rest on Xander.
“Get a basin filled with hot water and bring soap, washcloths and towels.”
“Is she all right?” Spike whispered.
“Seems she’s coming out of it but there’s a ways to go.” Willow answered with a small smile on her lips before disappearing behind the door again.
The others cleared a path for Xander to carry the basin and other requested items into the room. He came out a few moments later only to return to the room after retrieving clean linens for the bed. Then he too disappeared again and the wait continued.
“I hope to God she finally kicks you out for this.” Dawn directed at Spike. “You should have left with that bitch and spared Buffy all this shit you’ve been putting her through.”
The bedroom door opened and everyone was surprised when they saw Buffy leaning there. Her movements were small showing that she was still weak from her ordeal but the wounds however had disappeared from her body.
Buffy moved toward the wall where Spike was still sitting because he was too stunned at seeing her to be able to move or speak. She leaned against the wall and slid to sit on the floor next to him.
“Come here, baby,” she called to him holding her arms and caught him when he turned to her. His face nestled against her neck as her hands smoothed his hair. Then her gaze glanced around the room noting the frightened look on her children’s faces, the anger on Dawn’s and the concern on everyone else’s.
“Dawn, get out of my house. I heard what you said and you have no right to come into my home and insult my husband and make my children question their safety with him.”
“Buffy, why won’t you see? Come on, everybody, you have to back me up on this.” Dawn looked at everyone seeking support and not finding any.
“Dawn, what happened, was not done to her by Spike. You have to understand this. From what we can figure it happened out of her love for him, her desire to protect him from hurt. Doing the ritual wasn’t the smartest thing with a human, but with Buffy being the Slayer it was different due to her strength and stamina. Besides she is a grown woman, capable of making her own choices.” Giles retorted.
“So, once again he gets away with it and I am the one sent away.” Dawn shook her head in disbelief at the people around her.
“Dawnie, I love you and everyone else in the family but if it was Tara, you were attacking or if anyone else was, I’d do the same thing as Buffy.” Willow said.
“And I’d do the same for Anya,” Xander agreed.
“Just get out, Dawn, and until you can get over this, don’t come back,” Buffy looked up at her and watched as her sister stomped down the stairs. Then her gaze went to her children, “Come here,” she called to them. “It’s okay.”
Slowly, Raven came toward them, relieved that Buffy was going to be all right and Spike hadn’t done anything to hurt her. She sat on the other side of Spike, curling into his back with her arms around him in an attempt to help comfort him. Elijah, freed from Max sat between his parents while Buffy kept whispering words of love and comfort to her family.
Kate moved over to the family kneeling in front of Buffy, her hand coming to cup the other woman’s face. “You going to be okay?” Buffy nodded slowly. “We are going to go ahead and leave. I’m sure Max and Clem will be here if you all need anything but don’t hesitate to call me again if you want. Promise?”
“I promise, Kate. Thank you for helping to pull me out of that.” Buffy answered covering the hand on her cheek and squeezing it gently.
“That’s my job. I’m just glad that you’re going to be okay.” Kate leaned forward to kiss the younger woman’s cheek before standing.
Xander and Willow expressed their concern and gratitude that everything turned out all right before they also left. Clem wished them good night and made his way up the stairs and Max turned to leave to go back downstairs. Finally Spike looked up and spoke, “You’re really going to be all right?”
“Yes, I am going to be fine, Spike. Willow just kinda did one of her ‘get in my mind’ spells on me and got me to let go of it by telling me that it wasn’t real. I’m just sorry for scaring everyone that way. I…I just felt so guilty for so many things and I wanted to make it better.”
“Guilty?”
“For all the times I was such a rotten brat to you,” Buffy smiled softly to him.
“Brat would not be the word but it will do,” Spike leaned over to kiss her gently. “So, you don’t hate me. You really still love me?”
“Even more than before.”
Spike shifted so he could hug Raven and kiss her softly on the temple, “Let’s say we get her to bed in your room while I finish cleaning up our room. And Elijah could sleep with you tonight, too.”
“Okay,” Raven smiled up at her parents. She stood and reached her hand down to help pull Spike up. After everyone was standing they went to Raven’s room where Spike helped settle his wife and children into bed. He kissed each of them in turn after pulling the covers up around them.
“Promise you’ll come get me after our room is ready,” Buffy implored holding his hand.
“I promise, Baby,” Spike leaned down to give her a lingering kiss.
“Yuck,” Elijah crowed before diving under the covers while the others laughed at him.
After turning the light off Spike closed the door behind him. It took him only a few minutes to clean up the bedroom. The sheets and comforter would have to be thrown away so after everything else was done he carried them down the stairs.
“Everything okay?” Max asked as he watched Spike carry the bundle to the kitchen.
“Yeah, she’s fine.”
“Look, I’m sorry about what I said up there.”
Spike returned to the room with a garbage bag in his hand. “It’s okay. I understand.” He looked down at the floor. “In a way it’s good to know that you would protect her.”
“I would. Any of you.”
The only response Spike could give over his choked up throat was to nod then after finally swallowing it down, “Look, I’m going to take this out.” He lifted the bag in his hand, “then I’m going to run down to the corner store and get a pack of cigarettes.”
“I thought you quit?”
“I did. Mostly just want to get some air and clear my head. It’s been hell the last few days and…” Spike shrugged his shoulders. Everything was overwhelming him, the emotions and feelings were making him feel cornered again and he just needed to be away from everyone and everything for a few minutes.
“It’s okay. Anyone would be feeling overwhelmed in your shoes.” Max could read the vampire’s confusion and wanted him to know that it was okay for him to feel that way.
“Thanks. Watch over things while I’m gone.”
“I will.”
August 6, 2007 5:48 AM
Spike came out of the store packing his cigarettes and not really paying attention
to the things going on around him. Buffy, Faith, Dawn and everyone else was
vying for attention in his mind. As he turned the corner of the building where
his motorcycle was parked a man came to stand in front of him.
“Hey, vampire, heard you think you’re as good as a human.”
Spike tried to take a step around him knowing that to fight him would be a losing battle but that was when he noticed that there were three other men surrounding him. His eyes quickly darted around him trying to figure a way to get away but the sinking feeling in his stomach told him there probably wasn’t a way.
“Guess we’ll have to adjust you’re attitude,” one of the man snarled at him before putting a stun gun to Spike’s side.
Spike muscles began to spasm as the voltage hit him and he tried to shake his head to clear the dazed feeling but found himself unable to move. One of the other men hit him in the back of the knees with a baton forcing him to drop to the ground. A part of him was screaming on the inside as he felt several kicks to his kidneys and heard laughter around him. Spike fought to stay conscious as he was picked up and thrown in the back of a van but as he received a blow to the back of the head, his last thought before passing out was of Buffy waiting for him at home.
TBC
