Chapter 13 –
Suspicious Minds
“I don’t know, Cordelia,” Buffy said, turning slightly so that she could see how she looked from the back of a Dolce & Gabbana dress. It was called a ‘bra dress’ and she wasn’t feeling comfortable in the satin corset dress with a black bra peeking out from it. She preferred more classic, subtly sexy clothing and this was very overtly sexy. Tight around her waist, pushing her breasts up so that it looked like she had actual cleavage. She smoothed her hand down the skirt.
“I think you look good in it,” Cordelia said, coming to stand behind her. She gathered Buffy’s hair, twirling it into a bun on top of her head. “Look at yourself. You look hot. William will think so, too. He’ll be showing you off all over town in this thing.”
“Okay, but not for the party,” Buffy said, sternly. She didn’t care who the designer or how much it cost, she was not wearing that to try and impress William’s business friends.
“All right,” Cordelia said.
Buffy thought she saw a flash of disappointment in the brunette’s eyes. It couldn’t be though. Cordelia wouldn’t do anything to try and ruin William’s chances of getting his book published. It was why the woman had taken her shopping in the first place; to help Buffy fit into this world they took so casually. Now, if she could get past the prices that weren’t even on the dresses they were looking at. It was only Cordelia’s presence that had even gotten the sales people to look at her. She was beginning to feel like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman, when Cordelia breezed past her in her designer clothes and took over.
Since then it had been a whirlwind of clothes, from casual to evening wear, that was making Buffy hope William was telling the truth when he said get whatever. The stack was eating her alive with guilt. Her little family back in Sunnydale lived for years on what those clothes were going to cost.
“Do you have anything that is a little more subdued for an evening party?” Buffy asked the salesgirl who was helping.
“Of course, miss.” She nodded then disappeared to find something while Buffy slipped out of the dress she’d been trying on. Cordelia took it to add to the rack of clothes they were taking.
“We’ll have to make a quick stop in the lingerie department before we leave,” Cordelia said, sitting down and staring a little too much for Buffy’s comfort at the underwear bought in the pack. “You really do have a nice body. You just need to dress it up a bit. I bet Spike is having fun teaching you all sorts of games.”
“Games?” Buffy said, turning to look at the other woman in curiosity. “What are you talking about?”
“Oh, you are innocent,” Cordelia said, with a chuckle. She looked down to inspect her perfect nails. “You know dress up, role playing games, and then his all time favorite bondage.”
Buffy crossed her arms across her middle, staring now in confusion. William had been nothing but loving and passionate in bed. There was never a suggestion of him wanting these things Cordelia was talking about. With her lack of sexual experience she wasn’t even sure he would even ask her to perform any of those games. She turned to look at herself in the mirror. What did she know? Maybe he did like them, and if he did, and if he ever brought it up, she would deal with it them. Right now, not only was it embarrassing for her to have their sex life discussed, she also felt it was a betrayal to William to talk about him behind his back.
“Miss, what do you think of this?” The sales clerk said, bustling back into the dressing room. “It’s a Sue Wong.”
“Oh, it’s beautiful,” Buffy murmured, reaching out to take the long ivory dress from the clerk. Made of chiffon with a drop waist it was decorated with beads and crystals before ending in rows of delicate petals. “Thank you.”
“Now, it’s not an original or anything,” the clerk said. “But I think it’s perfect for you.”
“Which means you can’t move it,” Cordelia said, standing. “We need something unique. Can you handle that or do I need to speak with your manager.”
“No,” Buffy said, turning to the berated girl. “Would you zip me up, please?”
The dress was perfect; beautiful enough to be a wedding dress, but simple enough for the type of party that she would be attending with her husband. In the mirror stood a woman that Buffy hadn’t known existed. It emphasized her curves without over embellishing them, and it made her feel feminine. This was the one she couldn’t wait for William to see her in.
“See, miss,” the clerk said, meeting her eyes in the mirror. “I knew you’d like it.”
“No, I don’t like it,” Buffy said, with a smile. “I love it. Don’t you think so, Cordy?”
The brunette gave an offhanded shrug, but Buffy could tell she was impressed with the way she looked in the dress, too. It was decided. It was time Cinderella went to the ball.
~~~~~~
It was the first time Buffy and he had been separated for more than an hour or so since the day they married. Spike was wavering between enjoying the time apart and missing her with an intensity that burned him. It was almost certain that there was something magical about Buffy that drew him to her. Never before in his life had his heart felt this light…this happy. It scared him sometimes.
“I wouldn’t worry too much,” Xander said, taking another sip of his beer. “Cordy is going to make sure your girl is all prettied up.”
The comment pulled Spike from his daydream about his bride who he insisted he loved as she was. How could he not? She was sweetness personified with a beautiful face and a body that made his body feel as randy as he did as a teenager. What more could a man ask for? Yet, for some reason, Buffy felt that she wasn’t enough.
“I like Buffy the way she is,” Spike retorted. “I don’t want
some fake plastic
“You mean like my wife?” Xander replied, with a chuckle. He
held up his hand as he shook his head. “I understand, buddy. Don’t worry about
it.”
“God, mate, I’m sorry,” Spike said anyway. “I meant more like Dru.”
His first wife, a Hollywood princess, was raised to look, act, and be exactly that. Never given the time to discover who and what she would really want to be, she had become the most ruthless of females. Drusilla took what she wanted, when she wanted it, for as long as it amused her. Too bad, her husband had ended up boring her. Maybe if he hadn’t Drusilla would still be alive.
“Dru was never fake,” Xander said softly, looking away. “She was cold, heartless, ruthless and forever wanting attention, but never fake.”
“She could put on quite an act to get what she wanted,” Spike said. “She got you, didn’t she?”
He didn’t plan on saying it. Maybe it was because he finally felt free of Drusilla’s power that gave him the courage to finally speak it aloud. The two friends had shared a lot over the years as they grew up and became men, including a few women when they were still experimenting with sex and love. Spike knew that it was Drusilla who had started the affair with Xander. His friend would never betray him that way. It was because she was insatiable in the bedroom. She needed her passion and Spike had almost destroyed himself trying to keep her satisfied. It was when he gave up that he stopped blinding himself to her straying.
“What are you talking about?” Xander asked, with a nervous laugh. “I never slept with Dru.”
Spike smiled at his friend and shook his head. “Yes, mate, you did.” He sighed. “Don’t you think it’s time we quit the secrets? I’m still your friend, aren’t I?”
“I…shit, man; you just really know how to lay it on the line, don’t you?”
“No, reason not to anymore,” Spike said. “It’s over with. She’s dead. You and me are alive. Why hold a grudge?”
“Maybe because she was your wife and ?” Xander asked. He leaned back in the booth, draping his arm along the back. “I thought you fucking loved her…worshipped the ground she walked on. Drusilla was your savior from the nerd that you were fast becoming when she met you?”
“She was,” Spike defended himself. He regretted bringing it up at all. It seemed Xander was blinded to the evil that his wife had been. He cocked his head to study his friend. “You’re not in love with her, are you?”
“No,” Xander said. He leaned back on the table. “Let’s drop this whole thing. If you want a confession then yeah, I slept with your wife. Do I regret it? Yes. Would I do it again if I had to do it again? No, I would have come to you and told you what the princess was doing, but it was fun while it lasted.”
Xander was lying to him. There was some terrible secret hiding behind those puppy dog brown eyes that were staring at him so intently. The guilt over what he’d done came rolling back over him, but no matter what he was feeling, it couldn’t be undone now.
~~~~~~
Buffy was humming. It made Spike smile as he hurried down the hallway toward her. She sounded happy, and that in turn made him happy. It seemed like forever since he acknowledged that he could feel that emotion again. These days he reveled in it. Pushing open the door, he stopped as he saw the shopping bags tumbled across the bed.
“Well, looks like you bought out the store,” he commented, tilting his head to look at her. Immediately he felt bad when he saw the contrite expression that took away the tune she’d been singing under her breath.
“I’ll take it back,” Buffy said, dropping whatever was in her hand back into the bag she’d been taking it from. “I’m sorry. I got kind of carried away.”
She looked like she was going to cry. He sighed. “It’s okay, lamb. I told you to get whatever. Show me everything you bought, but first…,” he moved around the bed and pulled her into the glow of the dresser lamp. “I want to see this makeover that Cordelia got for you.”
Thankfully, her hair had only received a trim that took away the tangled ends that she often fussed about. Left with only the healthy grown, Buffy’s locks flowed, the ends curling below her shoulders. Once it was only a shade of gold, now there were strands that shimmered with an almost silver glow. Spike tucked it behind her ear, letting his fingers drift down the silky lock.
“Do you like it?” Buffy asked.
“Yes, I like it,” Spike replied, kissing the corner of her mouth. “You’re brows are waxed,” he added, his finger drifting between them down the arch of her nose to her lips. “You didn’t, did you?” His eyes involuntarily moved to her lower extremities.
“Wax it?” Buffy asked, with a blush. “No,” she answered, then after a small pause added. “Did you want me to?”
“No, no,” Spike said, breathing a sigh of relief. He pulled her against him, breathing in the delicate scent that was pure Buffy. He laughed, before confessing. “I know a lot of men find it a turn on, but I don’t.”
“I’m glad I didn’t then,” Buffy said, with a giggle. “The eyebrows hurt enough. I couldn’t imagine doing that to myself. Ouch.”
“Of course then I could have kissed it and made it better,” Spike teased, trying to keep Buffy from asking why he didn’t like it. It would have been impossible to explain how Drusilla liked to pretend that she was a schoolgirl that he was seducing. A game that made his stomach turn every time they played. Never again would he be able to have sex with a woman with a completely bare pussy again without feeling like a pervert.
“Yeah, you could have,” Buffy whispered. “But then again, you could just…,” she didn’t finish, but a delicious blush crept over her cheeks.
“Yes, I could, couldn’t I?” Spike said, walking them over to the bed. “I take it you missed me today?”
“Very much so,” she said, pulling him down on the bed on top
of her. “I don’t like being away from you.”
“I missed you, too,” Spike answered before kissing his wife. It was the perfect way to erase the past from his mind. The only thing that mattered was right there in his arms, loving him, and making him feel more than he ever had before.
to be continued…
