Letters to the Crazy, Drunk, Old Alcoholic Issue 01



Letters to the Crazy, Drunk, Old Alcoholic Issue 01		Back to index >

Letter of the week #1 Miss Old, Crazy Alcoholic, My name is Timmy and I am 4 and a half years old. I love reading your letters everyweek. You make me laugh. Can I get an autograph from you? Thank you. Timmy- 4 an a half? Yer too young to drink beer and screw kid, call me when you turn legal then we can have some fun! Cats! Cats! Gimme a beer. *Letter of the week #2* Alcoholic Lady, I think my boyfriend is cheating on me. The other day I found another girl's lipstick on his collar! When I confronted him about it, he played it off like nothing was wrong and that I was imagine things. What should I do? Disparraged in Des Moines Des Moines- Wha kinna name is Des Moines? Cats! Cats! ooooooooo! You an yer boyfrien nee some hhhhot sloppy six. I wish I had some six right now, I got my tubes tied though. Sweet alcohol eases the pain. *Letter of the week #3* Dear Crazy, Old Alcoholic, I live in the ghetto and I am very worried about all the guns and drugs that surround me and my 12 children. I am about to have another child and I am afraid for his safety too. What can I do? Glenda Ghetto Glenda- Is like I always say "Everytime I look in a mailbox, there's mail in it!" I think that's something we should all think about. I'm a train!

	Estelle Warrington is retired in Boca Raton, FL and lives the crazy, party, alcoholic lifstyle along with her nine cats Fluffy, Snookums, Mr. Peeps, Prof. Ivankinoff, Jasper, Kenneth, Tuna, Felix, and Mr. Fantabuloso the "Illusionist Cat"