fanny magnet
I seem to be attracting the female variety at a quite alarming rate. I haven't been such a fanny magnet for ages, eons even.
Maybe the gentlemen reading this will be grinning to themselves and taking their own wee trip down memory lane when once their attraction to ladies surpassed the heady levels of Brad Pitt in his day (or so they thought - 'beating them off with a shitty stick I was').

The ladies on the other hand may well be wondering how the fuck a skinny, pierced, tattooed, drunken Scotsman abroad could do anything other than attract Police attention at a rate Ronnie Biggs would be proud of.

Unfortunately for me the magnetism I seem to be exuding attracts only the female variety of fucking mosquitos! It's only the females who bite and boy is there a mosquito party at ferg's house this year. I have mesh to cover the windows and doors but somehow the little fuckers are still getting in. Either that or they're slipping into my pockets outdoors and eloping in that way.
Summer has failed to materialise over here in any great shape or form this year so the rainy season has just continued. It's still humid but wet with it - a veritable joy for the biting bitches. I also blame it on the pedigree Scots blood but no one else seems to believe that part.

I see the weather in Scotland and the rest of Europe is continuing to stop trains (eh?!), start fires, force people to call in sick with that 'terrible diarrohea' or 'dodgy stomach/food poisoning' that always surfaces when the temperatures go over 30C and cause general mayhem with the ice-cream supplies.
Good luck, enjoy while you can and don't get too burnt.

ferg
x

shut the fuck up
Just did 2 lip sewings in 15 hours - one for a 'performance' show/club night in Tokyo and one for a 'special photographic adventure' on a rooftop in the Tokyo evening sun with a very interesting photographer - to follow later with photos - promise.
And yes I'm still swollen, still sore, still happy with myself and still extremely thankful to 2 very important people who made it all happen for me.
Happy ferg. :) More soon.

anomaly
The scars are now healing very well.

I had a 2 hour skin peeling session in Tokyo about 3 weeks ago (as you can see by the main picture). Imagine cutting into the skin about 2mm deep and peeling off the small piece of flesh and the skin on top.

Scalpel skill and painstaking, pain-numbing perseverence were the order of the day, couped in a small hotel room in the south west of the busy metropolis. I'll try and put up a gallery of the photos soon.

I also got 3 small lines cut into my face on my left cheekbone. They have turned into small grooves but I expect them to heal over later and become flat. Eventually they will turn white like a normal scar.


Japan is a great place but I've been here too long doing the same boring, mundane, unstimulating job for far too much time. Seeing the same drones day-in-day-out is killing me from the inside out. I've been here for 2 and a half years now, a wee bit longer than I had originally planned. Finally paid almost all of my debt from the last 4 years just in time to rack it up going to university (again) next year in Australia.

Ho-hum.

Gonnae no dae that
This morning's Herald made me laugh with a twinge of 'why I love Glasgow' and a wee grin to go with it.

"SCOTS slang insults, such as "wido" - a rogue - could be included in a new version of an English dictionary.
There are calls for the words "binraker" - a scavenger - and "bamstick" - a foolish person - to be included in the updated Collins English dictionary. The phrases, including "tube" - another term for a foolish person - could be added to the seventh edition of the dictionary, to be published in 2006.

The publishers are also to consider introducing "tracksuit ambassador", a politically correct term for a ned, and "Paisley briefcase", a jocular slang word for a plastic shopping bag, into the pages.

And here is the most important part for me:

The heavy industries might have gone, but there is a distinctive Glasgow culture. People seem to have more fun in life and that comes across in a sense of playfulness with language.
They have a very black sense of humour that expresses itself in language and allows them to laugh at things much more."

Ahhhh yes, the stuff good memeories are made of. :)

ranting joy
Just in case you needed a wee reminder to get out and do stuff instead of sitting there talking bullshit about it for the rest of your life, you never know when you might just drop down stone dead like this poor footballer in France.

Remember the headline:
Footballer dies during game

You have been warned.