Ask Kiri
"Because Kiri is God and you're not, so you don't know everything"
What is your favorite flower?
Dear lazy ass
no name,
I don't really have a favorite because I know virtually nothing about flowers,
but here are some I find to be pretty: Orchid, Lisianthus, Gladiolus, Freesia
etc. etc. Its all about simplicity and NOT BEING A GOD DAMNED ROSE with me. :)
But in all honesty, if anyones thinking of buying me a present (since i am god
and all), I like jewlry a lot more then I like flowers.
~kiri
why oh why am i sooooooooooooooooooo happy that it's your birthday?????? happy birthday love!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ...Well...,
I don't know who wrote this, but I do have a few ideas, and I am SO happy in any case^^. Thank you so much^^! ~Kiri
Dear Kiri, What is your favorite lip gloss? I am on the market
for something with a good flavor and a hint of feminine color.
-Bob
Bob,
Something I really like that's really cheap is the mary-kate and ashley brand lip glosses.
You can find them at Wal-Mart, try the Glossy Sheers Liquid Shine Lip Tint in
Orange. I know, I know, orange sounds extreme, but its almost completely clear
with just a little bit of tint which actually ends out coming more of a VERY
VERY light coral. It runs about $3.00 at every wal-mart. If you wanna try
something expensive, try chanel glossimer extreme, the shades are pretty universal,
runs about $25, and you can say with pride "I am wearing CHANEL lipgloss!!!
AHHHHH!!!". Enjoy, and don't forget to pray to me three times a day facing
north. Peace.
Kiri
Are you really god? and if so what am i? if not....what am i?
Snookie,
Am I really God...Hmm...How to answer that...Oh! I know! Smiting your
blasphemous God-doubting ass! Thats right! BAM! You go to hell, mo-fo! lol. Yea,
I'm God. And, Charles darling, that makes you Gods bitch. You're pretty up there
on the big triangly-thing of life. Count your blessings (which I made, by the
way^^).
~Kiri
Dear Kiri,
I keep getting this burning sensation down there. What should I do about it? And
should I tell my boyfriend?
-Lucy
Dear Lucy,
Dear dear dear naive Lucy....Chances are he already KNOWS about the burning
sensation. You didn't have it BEFORE you slept with him, now did you? Nope! I
think you already know where I'm going with this.
As far as the burny-itchy...Well, let me tell you, doctors lie. Try a bag of
frozen peas or something else frozen and just keep it there until your numb. If
all else fails, just plain burn your genitals completely off until you have
nothing but char. That's what always works for me...
~Kiri
Dear Kiri,
Why does it bleed when I poop?
-Prudence
Prudence,
Well....sounds to me like you've got a cut in your ass. NICE! Good job,
Prudence. You really need to be more careful about that. You should try avoiding
sticking things in there until it heals up. If it doesn't, you'll have to tell
your parents and go to the doctor, and that'd be a bitch to explain, huh?! Lol.
Peace, and girl...watch yo' ass.
~Kiri
dear kiri
Tell me in 97 letters including spaces, about your favorite things.
Dear...you O.o;
Lipgloss, lingerie, audrey hepburn, natalie portman, orlando bloom, your mom and
flaming dead animals.
~Kiri
Kiri,
My friends are getting on my case about cutting myself. and if another one of my
friends starts up again they are gonna blame it on me. i want to stop but am not
sure how. i've only cut, well sorta light slicing that leaves marks, whatever,
twice. i dont' want to hurt their feelings anymore.
Alice
Dear Alice (reminds me of a book I once read),
First and foremost, I'd like to commend you, even talking about that on the
internet is braving, and knowing enough to know your hurting your friends is
smart.
Secondly...Alice, cutting yourself is something serious and I'm not saying
the advice I give is right, I'm not a doctor or a psychiatrist, by any means.
But cutting yourself, in my opinion, means you're ill. Something in your head or
something around you is making you sick to the point where you feel you have to
hurt yourself to release, in my opinion, that's a sickness. And also in my
opinion this isn't something you should be afraid to ask for help in regards to.
People get sick, its part of being human, and sitting around and feeling guilty
isn't gonna make you get better, or make it stop.
But also, you have to stop for yourself, not your friends. Keep in mind though,
that the people who are getting mad, aren't getting mad just for the sake of
being mad. They get mad because they care about you, and love you. They wouldn't
rat you out and throw your world into a frenzy if they didn't think it was for a
good reason, I assure you of that. I think what would be a good idea is trying
to stop, cold turkey. Just plain don't do it anymore.
If for some reason, you feel you can't, then try calling one of your friends
when you feel like it. If you feel like you can't just stop with that, then I
would recommend telling your parents before you hurt yourself well...anymore O.o;
Actually, its probably a good idea to tell your parents and ask for help now. I
know "They'll be mad! They'll kill me!" Wrong. They won't kill you, I
think we both know who would be the one doing that in this situation. Yea,
you're parents may be a little mad at first, maybe even freak out, but like I
said, its because they love you. Hopefully they'll understand that you're sick
and try to get you some help.
There are all sorts of ways to help get over this, but its hard to alone.
Remember your friends and family love you. Alice, my favorite little assistant
^~, you're beautiful, baby girl and you have no reason to do this to yourself.
If you need to, you can get me out of class through Peer Outreach and we can
talk about this in private at school, just go to Mrs. Urban and ask for me, she
has my schedule. If you don't feel comfortable talking in school, you know my
messenger names: (Yahoo - mars1738 aim - kirisuto1738 msn - pink_pais_1738@hotmail.com).
Peace baby girl, and get well soon.
~Kiri
[Editors note: Alice, Mary also has experienced problems with compulsive cutting and it more than willing to speak to you about it if you like. E-mail chorus_nerdbomber13@hotmail.com or AIM slpyjene or msn bottomm . Also you can visit her little page about cutting here.]
