Just to say I have something up I am going to publish some of my personal poetry for anyone who cares to read it to check out. I hope you like it and if not then it serves you right for reading the stuff anyway.
Secret Dreams Of The Night Fear Sanguinary Sonnet Holes In My Heart For Alia He Poison Kiss Going To Hell Black Velvet She
When it's dark at night you come and take me on a flight.
And when you see the light of day,
We go our own Separate ways.
Maybe it's real, maybe it's a dream,
Things aren't always what they seem.
But when you visit me at night,
I feel that things are right.
And maybe someday we will know that it is time to go and leave behind the
saddened dream.
Things aren't always what they seem.
Rules are made and broken too,
They were shattered when I fell in love with you.
As much as I try,
They will never see,
Just how much you mean to me.
The only thing behind their tears is a forbidden number of years.
They can never turn the page,
They can't get past the age to see that our love is true.
I dream of the day when we'll break through and it will be okay to say I love
you.
Until it comes,
I have to wait,
And put all my trust in fate.
They say if your love is true,
You will know what to do.
And yet they also say that this feeling will go away.
Can't they see I don't want it to?
To my heart I must be true.
When it's dark at night you come and take me on a flight.
And when you see the light of day,
We go our own Separate ways.
Maybe it's real,
Maybe it's a dream,
Things aren't always what they seem.
But when you visit me at night,
I feel that things are right.
And maybe someday we will know that it is time to go and leave behind the
saddened dream.
Things aren't always what they seem.
Tonight I'll call out your name,
Every night it's the same.
A lonely room filled with tears,
Crying for all the lost years.
It was not so long ago,
Or so far away.
It took me to where I am today.
A saddened dream for which I cry,
Something I'll believe 'till I die.
No matter how long I shed the tears,
It will never buy back the years I could not help but loose.
I didn't have the chance to choose.
Even though the rest can't see,
They try to understand me.
It is time lost in vain,
It can't be won back again.
I am hard to know,
Hard to see how I grow.
If they could see inside my head,
They'd know why I fear the dead.
Maybe then they'd understand,
Try to hold my trembling hand.
Or they might turn and walk away,
Not knowing what to say.
It is safer here in my lonely room,
Where I can hide away all the gloom.
If they still want to know,
It is time they tell me so.
I don't fear what people see,
As long as they don't hurt me.
If they knew what was true,
I just fear what they might do.
Knowledge and words,
The hurt is small.
Actions can destroy it all.
The things I fear are well known,
Hate, fear, fate, but most of all being alone.
Oh! The way I love to hear you crying,
To me a pretty sound so bitter sweet.
The sight of you fearing yourself dying,
Fearing the other side and what you'll meet.
I see your eyes filled with hatred and fear,
Searching for an answer that comes too late.
You only understand you're end is near,
Resign yourself to an uncontrolled fate.
All your life you have prayed for a release,
You will find your rest in the shade.
Soon my sweet your labored breathing will cease,
All it takes is one quick flick of the blade.
So kiss me sweetly dear and close your eyes,
For tonight all that is good and light dies.
Tasted the blood underneath you skin
Just enough to let me swim
Close my eyes and feel it burn
The more I know the less I learn
I hate you
I hate you
There are pieces of you hiding inside me
You’re clouding me up so I can not see
Driving me on ‘cause you can not wait
Singing sweet songs to invoke hate
I hate you
I hate you
Suck me dry through the holes in my heart
Tear me to pieces come on rip me apart
Fill me with the sickness that’s inside you
Is that how you prove that love is true
I hate you
I hate you
I felt the night as it embraced my soul,
Like black ribbons that entangled my heart.
My life force faded burning cold,
A beautiful beast, tearing me apart.
Great rivers of silver flowed through my mind,
Pulling to try to carry me away.
A cold voice rang out that I could not find,
Crying aloud begging me to stay.
Oh! Where will you go to, she asked of me,
Her glassy eyes filled with tears for her love.
I go where my eyes shall never again see,
The blue and gold skies that shine up above.
With these words, I kissed her lips, held her head,
And left to join the cold world of the dead.
I stood in his room
Clutching my bag like it was my only life-line
Awkwardly waiting, dreaming, hoping that something would happen.
Anticipation of what was to come.
He drifted towards me like a specter of light.
His presence enveloping me like smoke,
But through the mist I saw a light burning, shining in his eyes.
His lips pressed against mine.
I felt it as we melted into one another and collapsed on the bed.
Felt the press of his love, tight but not suffocating.
His words, hot and cold, were like a distant dream to me.
All else drowned out by the symphony of his body, his feel, his mysterious
scent.
My mind filled with a blinding light through which nothing was visible, save his
face.
Colors melted and blurred together in my mind
Painting pictures that could never capture love.
The sound and the light grew so great I could no longer bear it then diminished
again.
A tiny flame burning in the back of my mind.
The dream faded leaving but a memory, shadows of great things that had passed.
My soul died.
I could not save it and he will not come again.
I feel it all inside my head like a bomb ready to burst.
Trying to break through, trying to break though, trying to break me down.
Rip me up and spit me out, drag me through the dirt.
Go on, mutilate me, try and make it worse.
I would scream out loud, scream so loud it would make my eardrums bleed.
But all the screaming in the world is not enough for me.
And all I want is to find what I am searching for.
And all I want is to feel the pain no more.
And all I want is to get away from this.
And all I want is your poison kiss.
The morning alarm cuts through me, just like a knife.
Tears right through me, tears right through me, tearing me apart.
Every day the same old thing, try to make it through.
Never find the right words, never find my place.
All the time I never find what I am look for.
I hear them laughing, hear them curse, as I try to break free.
And all I want is to find what I am searching for.
And all I want is to feel the pain no more.
And all I want is to get away from this.
And all I want is your poison kiss.
My insides are all rotting out, turning black and gray.
I feel it break down, feel it break down, feel it breaking me.
Crumbling up on the ground I blow away like dust.
Never before have I felt so hollow inside.
If I could I would run away, get far away from this fucking place.
But all the running in the world wouldn’t help me escape.
And all I want is to find what I am searching for.
And all I want is to feel the pain no more.
And all I want is to get away from this.
And all I want is your poison kiss.
Every time I fall to the ground I look up and see you.
You keep on pushing me, keep on pushing me, keep on pushing me around.
I try so hard to stay out, stay out of your way.
Every time you come around I can’t move.
And even if I try to hate you, you still freeze me up.
I hear you laughing, hear you curse, as I try to break free.
And all I want is to find what I am searching for.
And all I want is to feel the pain no more.
And all I want is to get away from this.
And all I want is your poison kiss.
It was late at night
As I lay in my bed
The sinister voices
Pouring into my head
And I never wanted this
And I just want to cry
The voices keep on telling me
I’m going to die
It just doesn’t seem fair
There is nothing I can do
No way to prevent
These things from coming true
And I just want to shout
And I just want to scream
I want to wake up
But this isn’t a dream
And the more I resist
The closer it is
And the more I lash back
The closer to attack
And even if I win
I’m committing a sin
And I don’t need to sell
I’m already going to Hell
So I am trapped in a room
There is no one to hate
Even if there was
I’m sealed in my fate
And there is nowhere to run
And there is nowhere to hide
The monster lies in wait
Till he makes me his bride
Now I wish that
I knew how to pray
What I wouldn’t give
To see the light of day
And no one really knows
And no one understands
That my entire life
Is out of my hands
And the more I resist
The Closer it is
And the more I lash back
The closer to attack
And even if I win
I’m committing a sin
And I don’t need to sell
I’m already going to Hell
The clock on the wall
Is ticking it’s time
I’m waiting in fear
For the midnight chime
And it creeps closer and closer
And it is drawing near
The ominous clicking
Is all that I hear
The wind outside
Dances soft through the night
It builds up and builds up
Adds to the fright
And everyone can feel
And no one can see
All the evil things
That are happening to me
And the more I resist
The closer it is
And the more I lash back
The closer to attack
And even if I win
I’m committing a sin
And I don’t need to sell
I’m already going to Hell
I remember the heated moments
All of the fights
The times apart
Long lonely nights
And I begin to regret
And I begin to break down
All I ever needed
Is to have him around
Choosing to be strong
Was my biggest mistake
But I never realized
My soul was at stake
And it’s much too late
And there is no time
But if I let it all go
Perhaps I’ll be fine
And the more I resist
The closer it is
And the more I lash back
The closer to attack
And even if I win
I’m committing a sin
And I don’t need to sell
I’m already going to Hell
If there is a God
I never knew
There is a Devil
I’ve met quite a few
And maybe He can’t see
And maybe He doesn’t care
About His flock
And what happens down there
Everyone is scared
We’re all in pain
But perhaps he can’t tell
Because we all look the same
And if I had the chance
And if I had the way
I would find the Savior
I would make Him save
And the more I resist
The closer it is
And the more I lash back
The closer to Attack
And even if I win
I’m committing a sin
And I don’t need to sell
I’m already going to Hell
Her black velvet wings wrap around me
Covering my eyes so I can not see
As she drinks my kisses deeply
As she sees right through me
Somewhere soft deep inside
She finds a place where she can hide
With her violet eyes and forked tongue
She devours the souls of the young
But never the lost-
Because she loves me far too deeply
And she never takes her own kind
She moved soft through the night on velvet wings
Kissed me sweetly with her glittering eyes
And of the past she silently sings
But shyly conceals her face when she cries
All clothed in black she stands under the moon
Sorrowfully she will begin to dance
Feeling the ending always comes too soon
Breaking the spell of her submissive trance
And her love is like the kiss of the night
Chilling me and devouring me whole
But she always leaves me before daylight
Passionate and protective of my soul
And tonight will greet me with parted lips
And torture me with hungry finger tips
