Celebs I would like to fight.... 2

Where do I begin with the celebs I would want to fight? When I turn on the TV, all I see are morons doing gay things that make me want to punch them in the throat. But as with my comrade Varnson, I’ll throw just a few your way. Now remember, this is the bottom of the barrel and these celebs are pretty fuckin weak so I think I’d really do some damage.

Jenny Craig

Now, first off I don’t think I’ve even seen this bitch’s face but I'm sure she's ugly! Here's an artists rendering off to the side. The main reason I hate her is those crappy commercials. Bottom line is I hate fat people. Fat people are the garbage wrappers that stick to the side of your leg on a windy day. Fat people are telling the world “Hey, look at me! Im a big fuckin ball of lard and I look like feces!” And this SLUT Jenny Craig is helping them become thin?! Its like dressing up a dog for Halloween…its still a fuckin dog! I really don’t need these imitation thin people walking around and trying to be my friends because if I found out you were once fat, I will punch you in the mouth (cause I ain't punchin you anywhere else you fat fuck). I am SOOOO friggen sick & tired of hearing lame ass comments from fat ass ugly out of shape hogs! Don't hate me because I care about my appearance. Maybe if you sows put down the Doritos & the remote, and got off your cellulite asses your boyfriends/husbands might not PUKE as often. Then there are those “success stories” where people talk about how they’ve lost like a million pounds but the thing is…they STILL look fat! If I ever find out Jenny Craig is coming to my town, I am going down to the fat farm she’s going to be speaking at and walk up, knee her in that hunk of lard flowing from her side and when she is down, I am going to feek all over her roll infested butter factory (ie. Her body)

Oprah

Alright, lets get this going before I have a hernia from the amount of hate I have for this women. The obvious reason is that she’s a thin wannabe. She is a fat black whore and she needs to come to terms with it and then die. Whenever she has a good guest on…someone who actually has the ability to take a shit on their own, she never lets them talk! And I hate how she’s in love with Tiger Woods just because he makes a zillion dollars and plays a “sport”. But she never says that…she’s into the whole “he’s a brotha” thing. He isn’t even a brotha cause he talks like a white guy and you don’t have a chance bertha so jump off a building. You fat cow, why aren’t you dead? I always see her on TV trying to “run” these marathons (again, trying to act like a thin person) but the thing is, she isn’t even running. Instead she is “fat walking” which is a type of walk where you let the momentum of your blubber make your legs move. I see it all the time. If I ever see Oprah doing a marathon in my town, I’m gunna run at her full speed and drop kick her and when she is down, I’m going to stomp on her ear.

Oprah

Have you seen or heard about this shit producing TV show? Well as far as I’m concerned all the women on this “show” can choke on their own feces. The show is made up of an anorexic Chinese hoe named Lisa, the most annoying woman on earth named Joy (JOY?...what the FUCK is that?!) Some white mom who is always showing her sagging boobs named Meredith and finally a human black BLIMP named Star (yup…you read right…STAR!) When these vomit queens get together they talk about…I don’t really know what they talk about….since I’m too busy PISSING AT THE SCREEN! They had Norm Macdonald on this one time and they just made fun of him the whole time. Norm had a pencil in his hand and I was yelling at him to stab Joy in her fat face. I mean, Norm is a hilarious guy and just cause he isn’t some fag like…Will Smith, doesn’t mean you hoes can make him look bad. Actually they didn’t make him look bad because you could put a pile of rotting feces next to them and it would look good. These four skank magnets need to get off the air and if they ever come to my town… well I’m too lazy to fight all 4, so I’d just cover the first three in chocolate and have that busted lard bag Star eat them.