IWA Superstars

May 6, 2000

[The scene opens again in a control room showing various wrestlers wrestling in matches. It also has a couple of what looks to be interviews going on. Nick Hunter is standing in front of one of the monitors wearing a Baltimore Ravens t-shirt. He looks to be in that classic Nick Hunter pissed off mood. He takes a couple of drags on his cigarette before just tossing it towards the camera.]

Nick: I’m not in a good mood this week if you people couldn’t already guess. Attitude Problem has come and gone, and we’re all back in the happy United States. Well those of us that the IWA decided to send to Europe. Some of us had to stay here and do pre pay per view shows. I’m looking forward to the upcoming Storm and Chaos shows we have. And it has nothing to do with the matches that are going to be happening. It has everything to do with the fact that some of the people that went AWOL for a while have finally decided to bless us with their presence. [He rubs a fake tear away from his eye.] We should feel so blessed that our United States Champion has decided to show his face again, when he should have been in Europe putting that title on the line. And the man decides that he is going to send a memo to Commissioner Magnum telling him he would defend the title. And I have a copy of that memo, thanks to the fact that I am so close to the Commissioner’s secretary. [He pulls a piece of paper out of his pocket.] It reads “I assert my rights as United States champion to defend the title this Sunday, May 6th on Storm against Chill Factor. His loss to Nightmare not withstanding I believe he is the number one contender for the belt – and is worthy of a shot in any case. I have already faced Nightmare twice in singles action and once in a three-way match – someone else deserves a shot now. Furthermore, should I be victorious I think I am entitled to a return match with Justin Blair for the World Title. I await your response.” Now what the hell is going on here? This guy goes around doping his own thing and thinks that he is entitled to a rematch with Blair just because he is ready for it. I don’t think it works that way pretty boy. And what is the deal with all these people that I would definitely not have in the title picture getting title shots. Chillfactor is a good competitor, but are we sure that we would want him representing himself as our United States champion. Frankly, you have people that think that watching Chill factor’s antics are the most hilarious things in the world. I don’t think that way. The man annoys the hell out of me.

[He tears the memo up and throws it over his head.]

Nick: now who else did I want to have a couple of words about? Oh yeah, It appears that Body Count has the left the IWA. Why did they leave? I really don’t care. They probably figured out that they couldn’t cut it here. But while I’m on the subject of tag teams let’s move on to Special Forces. They went AWOL too for a while. Maybe they a Kool decided to hang out together on some kind of vacation. Let’s forget what we’re paid to do. WE don’t want to do it right now. That’s what you guys were thinking wasn’t it? And then you decided to whine and complain about the new people here and the fact that you can’t get a match with someone when you get back. And then these two did what I consider to be the most pathetic thing known to man. First off you guys really need to go back to insult school especially if you plan on using that as your way of getting a match. Or why don’t you just challenge someone? That seems to be the most acceptable way for someone to get a match around here. Wait, if you guys can’t insult then maybe good ol’ Nick needs to teach you how to challenge someone. Wait.. [He turns to his right.] Hey Howard, would you mind stepping out here for a second. [A small fat man walks out wearing a Star Wars shirt.] This is one of our directors.

Howard: hi

Nick: [looking directly at Howard.] Ok Howard I challenge you to a drinking contest tonight. I want to prove to you that I am the better drinker. Do you accept my challenge?

Howard: [looking confused.] yes I do.

Nick: [looking back at the camera.] Ok thanks Howard. [Howard waves and walks off the scene.] And that is how you challenge someone to a match. If there aren’t any questions then I’ll go to my next rant. What is my next rant? Oh yeah my good buddy Rich Stewart. Hey Rich could you come out here please? [Rich Stewart walks out into the scene.] How are you doing Rich?

Rich: I’m good, but you don’t seem like you’ve been in a good mood lately.

Nick: I haven’t. But I got something for you that is going to put you in a very good mood.

Rich: [looking a bit afraid.] You’re not going to take me to another bar are you?

Nick: nothing of the sort. [He reaches in his pocket and pulls out a plane ticket.] Here ya go Rich. Enjoy Hawaii. You’ve been working to hard lately and doing too many interviews. Go take a load off and we’ll see you in a week.

[Rich just stands there staring at the ticket. A huge smile engulfs his face as he jumps up into the air and screams “I’m going to Hawaii. He runs out of the scene.]

Nick: That was my good deed for the year. The kid needed the break. Now maybe some of our other interviewers will get off their buts and go do some interviews. Now I beat that you people are just waiting for a hit of the week? I know you are. Well since there was no Chaos this week then I guess we’re going to have to take the hit of the week form the pay per view. Now what match was worthy of being talked about on my show? Matter of fact I’m not going to do it. I just remembered that there is going to be a replay of the pay per view tonight. Ok people it’s interview time. The wrestlers have really been pissing me off this week so I asked Joey Summers to stop on by and rap with me for a while. So Joey Summers come on down. You are the next contestant on well my show.

[Joey walks out and sits next to Nick. They shake hands.]

Nick: Thanks for coming Joey.

Joey: I’m glad I could come.

Nick: Joey, you’ve had a lot to do with the IWA. What would you say was your opinion about your place in this company due to the involvement you’ve had in it over the years?

Joey: [after a little thought.] I've never wanted anything big in the IWA. Sure I've said on numerous occasions that I'm eventually going to take over the IWA and rule it with an iron fist, but then I saw Danny-boy and Johnny try to do that, and I thought...better not. I loved being an announcer, and I like being a referee. I would love to be able to get back into the ring one more time though.

Nick: How’d did it feel when you helped Robert to get the IWA back from Daniel James on his first run in the IWA?

Joey: [he has a little smile on his face.] Smashing that chair into Danny-boy's head was the best moment in my life. The only thing I regret about that, is him being able to escape from the ring. I keep thinking that maybe if I hit him that much harder, he actually would have been knocked out cold, and he wouldn't have been able to get up and run under the cover of darkness.

Nick: A follow up question to the last one. What was your feeling about your position in the IWA when you returned from the concussion that James gave you and found out that things had changed around you?

Joey: In all honesty, I still have problems remembering what was going on when I first came back. Danny-boy scrambled my brains a good bit with that chair shot. I came back too early for my own good. Robert tried me out as an announcer again, but I messed things up. I had problems remembering names, moves, etc. So he pulled me, and sat me out until I was 100%. The problem is he tried a weird mix of announcers that just gelled together, and created some great announcers, so even when I was 100% we both agreed it wouldn't be right for me to take one of their spots, so when Andy became a referee, I jumped at the chance too. Haven't regretted it at all.

Nick: What made you decide to become a referee? [He begins to look in his jacket for a cigarette.]

Joey: Well basically the thought never crossed my mind, until Andy volunteered to be one, because he thought he was getting too old to actively participate in the wrestling matches. Actually, he had a higher ideal in mind, because he was tired of sitting at the announce table and seeing all the rules broken left and right, so he wanted to get into the ring and try and stop it. I guess I just followed along. Me and Andy are like peanut butter and jelly. I don't have his ideals, but I still get a paycheck, which is what my ideals are based around.

Nick: Not many people out there watching today know about your former wrestling career. I know that you had a feud going with the owner of the IWA Robert Chauncey, but past that I really don’t know that much about your career either.

Joey: Well my wrestling career began in a very early form of the NWA, up in New York. I wasn't the best there, but I made a name for myself. Unfortunately it wasn't a good name. I stepped on so many toes, that they eventually fired me from it. I went a few years without wrestling before I joined the IWA, where I was actually their first TV champion, beating a guy by the name of Enforcer. I then dropped it to that loser, Andy Perry [laughs.] I went on to unsuccessfully win the US Title from that other loser, Robert Chauncey, after numerous...and I mean numerous attempts. Then the World Champion...another loser...Ninja Dean Christian, took a leave of absence, vacating the title. So they set up a tournament, and in the final round, I finally beat Robert, winning the World Title. I lost it to Andy, then won it back. Lost it to Robert. Then Andy won it from him, and I beat Andy for it. Then Dean came back, won it from me, and kept it until the IWA shut down. After that, I went on to several other Indy feds, but never achieved the success I did in the IWA. Then I heard Robert was opening a new IWA, and the rest they say is history.

Nick: [with a look on his face like he’s been waiting to ask this question.] I talked to Mariah Whethers a while back and she told me that most memorable moment she had working with you was when she sent you to the Brotherhood’s locker room after their hearse had just been destroyed in the Stirl/ Fate hardcore match. Have you ever thought about getting some kind of revenge on her for that little prank?

Joey: [laughing] I was hoping this wouldn't come up. I was hoping that everyone had forgotten this. Yeah, I would love to get some kind of revenge on here, but I wouldn't go through with it. Mariah has been through a lot. Besides, we've kind of made amends.

Nick: ok I wouldn’t feel I was doing my job as a broadcast journalist if I didn’t ask you this. What are your feelings on all the attacks going around?

Joey: It's scary. Plain and simple, scary. [He looks a bit disturbed showing the effect that this is having on him.] The wrestling world is dangerous enough as it is. Even as a referee, someone could slam into me the wrong way, and cause me to get injured. I mean look at Lost Star. But now someone is going around attacking people with no rhyme and reason. He or she killed Corsair. Zero and Terrance White are still missing. I mean come on, it is damn scary. What's worse is that the one guy, who seems concerned by the whole thing, is that asshole Justin Blair. [He slams his fist into the desk.] He wants Christoph to do something, when Christoph is doing something. He's hired three times more security. He's actively involved in the police investigation. He has allowed the police to talk to anyone they want. He's doing all he can do, short of shutting the IWA down until the murderer is caught. But if the wrestlers acted like they gave a damn, then maybe they could help us solve this thing. [He knocks one of the coffee mugs off the desk.]

Nick: it would be nice if some of the people around here was not interested in just their little lives and paid a bit of attention to what is going on around here.

Joey. Yeah. [He tries to regain his composure.] I come into work every day, with a little bit of fear. I go home...check all the closets, check under my bed, and make sure the doors and windows are all locked...all with fear. So it is the scariest thing I've ever been through.

Nick: I don’t blame you. But it seems that we are out of time today. I’d like to thank Joey for taking time out of his busy schedule for talking to us. I’m Nick Hunter what you’ve seen was my opinion. And this is what you do if you don’t like any of it. You hold up you’re right hand and stretch all your fingers out. Make sure that your palm is facing away from you before you do any of this. Then slowly put all your fingers down except for your middle finger. That is what you do if you have a problem with me. [Joey looks like he wants to laugh.] I’m out of here. Join me next week when I continue to say what I want whenever I feel like doing it. Later people.

[Fade to the shows credits.]