Secrets

by: Megan JuJusCraseeLikeThat@yahoo.com

*Lyrics: "Forever"~Westlife*

*I'll be loving you forever
Deep inside my heart you'll leave me never
Even if you took my heart and tore it apart,
I would love you still forever.*

"Hey beautiful!"
Jennifer swung around to see Justin standing before her, arms outstreched.
"Oh my gosh! Justin! I thought you werent coming back!" She screamed as she ran into his arms. She hadn't seen him in 6 weeks and this surprise visit was just what she was needing. They stood there holding each other until Jc walked in.
"Hey man, Whats up?! i thought-"
"Thought I wasn't coming...yea yea. I know man! But I decided I couldn't be without Jennifer for another 2 months"
Jc cringed *be without Jennifer* he thought to himself.
"So I dropped out of the basketball tournament...I just missed everyone so much... and I just wanted to see you so much." He leaned down and planted a soft kiss on Jen's lips. Jen smiled to herself. She hadn't realized just how much she missed him until he was back in her arms again. There for her to touch, kiss and cuddle with.
Jc and Justin had been best friends since they were little. The infamous MMC days. They had formed a group that they called *NSYNC, with a couple other guys, but their singing career hadn't started off yet.
"So where is everyone?!"
"Oh Lance and Megan are at the movies, Joey went to a party and Chris is with his girlfriend." Jc replied glad to see Justin.
"Oh ok.....So I guess it's just you and me Jen!"
Jen could see that JC was hurt by this remark. "Well, why dont we ALL go out to dinner or something?!"
"No thats ok, Jen.... I've got stuff to do around here, you guys go along without me" JC shot back. He knew Justin really didnt want to see him, he wanted to be with Jen.
"Alright man! Later!"
As Jen and Justin ran out the door, JC tried to shake the feelings that were running through his mind. He didnt want Jen to go with Justin. Something about it wasn't right. *oh well* he thought to himself and sat on the couch to play a video game. But his mind kept wandering back to the day. To the day his best friend died, and Jen came to live with him.

*~Flashback~*
"HAHA! you suck!" JC screamed as he made Mario turn the corner.
"No I don't! Im ahead of you!!" Jen stuck her tongue out at JC and they finished the race on Mario Kart 64. "Why are you over here anyway?!"
"Well I figured since your mom, dad, and brother are all on the plane to your grandmas, you must be lonely here, so I came to keep you company....Plus I don't have a Nentendo 64 to play!" He grinned and Jen punched him in the arm. "Oh no you didn't!" he yelled at her and then tackled her to the ground.
JC and her brother Joe had been best friends since they were born. Inseperable. They did everything together. They went to school together, played sports together, even went on dates together. But Joe left to go to his grandma's with his parents. Jen stayed behind because she went there alone for 2 weeks over the summer. She didn't want to go again.They were still rolling on the ground when the phone rang.
"JC lemme up I need to get it!"
"Say MERCY!"
"NO!"
"Say it or I wont let you up!"
"ok Ok! MERCY!"
Jc quickly got off her as she scrambled to the phone.
"Hello?....What!? no...no no no............" she dropped the reciever and stood stunned.
"Jen?! Jen whats wrong?!" she turned and looked at him, tears rolling down her rosy cheeks.
"they're.......they....they're....." She broke into sobs and Jc quickly wrapped his arms around her.
"They're what sweetie?!"
"they're dead......"she said softly hardly managing to get the words out straight. ".....the...the plane...it crashed......no one....no one"
"Shhhhh its ok" JC new exactly what she was trying to say. No one lived. He broke into tears and softly rocked her back and forth. She had collapsed in his arms. *My best friend is....dead* He cried with her.
That night was one of the worst for both Jc and Jen. Once JC had finally calmed jen down to the point where she could actually talk a little, he carried her into her room and laid her softly down on the bed. "Please stay with me JC.....please" She was still crying and leaving her alone was just about the worst thing that JC could have done to her. "alright sweetie...shhhh its ok" Jc climbed into the bed next to her. She wrapped her arms around him and laid her head on his chest and cried. "Shhh....its alright...im here.." Jc stroked her hair until they both fell asleep.
Things could only get better after that night. And JC asked Jen if she wanted to move in with him so he could take care of her and so she didn't have to move to South Dakota with her Grandma. But also because he felt that there was a little piece of Joe in her, and he never wanted to forget him. Didnt want to forget anything.
~*End Flashback*~

"You're losing.."
"Oh hey Lance....yea I know I was just thinking."
"Anything I can help you with?"
"No....I'm not even sure whats going on..but thanks anyway."
"No problem! Cmon Megan, lets go raid the fridge."
Jc watched as Megan and Lance ran hand and hand into the kitchen. They were deeply in love, and JC loved to watch them....watch the little things they did. *Why can't I be happy like them?!* Jc thought to himself. *Why can't I have someone like that?* Thoughts like that kept rolling through his head as he fell asleep on the couch.

*You are my sun,
You are my life,
And you're the last thing on my mind
Before I go to sleep at night.
You're always round,
When I'm in need,
When troubles on my mind,
You put my soul at ease.
There is no one in this world who can love me like you do,
And that is why I wanna spend forever with you.*

"Hey sleepy head. WAKE UP!" JC felt something pounding against his head but he didn't want to open his eyes. "WAKE UP!!!!"
"Man quit hitting me Joey!!! Im awake! Go away, get outta my room!!!"
"Well excuse me! Someone sure woke up on the wrong side of the bed....or should I say couch. Since when has this been proclaimed your room?!" Jc sat up on the couch. He had fallen asleep last night and never crawled back into his bed. *Oh well* he thought *It's not like anyone missed me anyway*
"Sorry Joey..."
"It's alright"
Jc draged himself to the kitchen where Lance, Justin, Jen and Megan were eating breakfast. "Where the hell are my Cornpops?!"
"Sorry man I ate the last of them!" Justin replied Cheerfully.
"D*mmit! YOu think you can just come home, totally ignore me and then eat all my cornpops?! The only thing I ask for in the morning is my d*mn bowl of cereal! Here!" Jc threw his keys at Justin.
"What did you do that for?!"
"Cause you're going down to the store to get me some cornpops! Have a nice ride!" Justin sat there in shock staring at JC. "NOW!"
"alright!!!" Justin ran out the door and JC took his seat at the table resting his head in his hands.
"Are you ok J bear?!" Jen asked. JC's heart melted. She hadn't called him J bear in a while, but he loved it when she did.
"Im fine." he said cooly. "Im just....I dunno, something is bothering me....Ill be fine."
"Ok but if you need anything im here ok?" She said as she ran her fingers through his hair. He shivered at the touch.
"right...Im gonna take Justin's car and go apologize.... see ya later"

As Jc drove to the store, things kept getting to him. *Why am I feeling this way?! What is wrong with me? After all this time do I have feelings for Jen? No I can't! She's with Justin.....she's with Justin....* As Jc turned the corner to pull into the parking lot he thought he saw something. *Is that Justin!? With another girl?* He drove up closer. It was....Justin kissing another girl. How was he going to tell Jen? It would break her heart! He quickly drove home before Justin could see him. When he got out of the car, he kept wondering how he would tell Jennifer.
"Well did you apoligize?" Jen questioned. Jc always loved her persistance.
"No..no I saw him driving out of the parking lot when I got there....he should be home soon." He didnt have the heart to tell her the truth. He'd talk to Justin about it first. *Ohhh she looks so pretty.....but no! I can't fall for her! She doesnt like me in that way....I'm like and older brother to her....*

*I'll be loving you forever
Deep inside my heart you'll leave me never
Even if you took my heart and tore it apart,
I would love you still forever.*

JC slammed the door to Justin's room. "What the heck did you think you were doing?!"
"What are you talking about?!" Justin replied. "What the heck is your problem!? Ever since I got here you've been nothing but rude to me!"
"I've been rude?! You wanna tell me who that girl was you were kissing in the parking lot?!"
"Shhh....Jen will hear you!!"
"No I'm not going to 'Shhh'...I hope she hears it so she can hear what a slime ball you are!! How long have you been cheating on her? Huh? Were you actually at a basketball tournament? Or were you just out with that girl?" Justin stared at him blankly...speachless. "There was no tournament was there? Oh Justin how could you do this?! She loves you with all her heart! How could you....." Jc walked out stunned at the amount of anger he had just shot at Justin. *Where did all that come from? I can't believe he would hurt her....I've gotta get out of here.*
Jc walked down the hall to his room. He hopped into the shower and turned on the warm water. It felt good and he decided that he was going to tell Jennifer after his shower.

"So hows everything going with Justin?" Megan asked Jennifer while they were sitting on the couch watching THE 6TH SENSE.
"Ohhh....It's wonderful! Hes so sweet. I think our relationship is getting a lot better. I love him a lot." Megan and Jennifer had been friends shince childhood when their friend introduced them. Ever since they had been best friends, and Jen knew that she could tell Megan anything and visa-versa. "How's Lance?"
"Oh he's-"
"I'm what?" Lance smirked as he walked in. He sat next to Megan on the couch.
"You're a dork!"
"Oh really?! Well then if im a dork I guess you don't want to go see the Patriots play tonight....at least not with me...cause ya know..im a dork and everything"
"You liar you didn't get tickets!" Lance waved the tickets in front of her face. She loved football and had been dying to see her favorite team, the patriots, play.
"OH!! I love you so much!!" She screamed as she kissed him.
"You guys are too much..."Jen sighed. *I hope me and Justin have that kind of relation ship...I'd die to have what they have* "Ok you two...you can stop kissing now!"
"Mmmm...We have to leave now if we want to be there on time sweetie." Lance told Megan.
"Ok..have fun with Justin tonight Jen!"
"Bye you guys." Lance and Megan left hand in hand. Jen sighed.
"Jen? Can I talk to you?"
"Sure J bear."
"Well, this morning...when I went to apologize to Justin, I saw him kissing another girl..."
"What?! How could you say something like that?!"
"I'm telling the truth!"
"Well you know what? Justin already talked to me, and he told me that you were going to try and break us up....but I got mad at him and I didn't believe it! I didn't believe that you would EVER try and do something to hurt me... And now you come to me and actually try and make me believe he's cheating on me!? How could you do something like that JC?! How could you sink so low? Justin would never!" Jen stormed out of the room leaving Jc alone.
*How could she believe him?* A single tear rolled down his cheek. *I do love her.....What am I going to do?! Now she hates me!*
"By JC!! Were going to the movies" he looked up to see justin smirking at him and Jen looking the other way. JC shot him a dirty look. "Have fun here...by yourself!" Justin smiled as he closed the door.

*We've had our fun,
We've made mistakes.
But who'd have guessed along the road
We'd learn to give and take
It's so much more than I could have dreamed,
Cause you make loving you so easy for me*

"You wanna talk now?"
"Lance I thought you went to that football game?"
"We did. It's been 6 hours since we left." Megan answered for Lance.
"Whats wrong? What have you been doing?" Lance questioned.
"I've been thinking....crying....I think my heart is broken...." Jc sniffled.
"Dude what happened?" Lance talked to him and Megan listened as JC told them the whole story. How he saw Justin. How he yelled at Justin. How he told Jen and now she hated him.
"You've just gotta tell her you love her....Or wait till she finds out on her own."
"How's she gonna find out on her own?"
"Well...next time Justin goes out alone, Take Jen and follow him....Just don't tell her what you're doing."
"Thanks Lance... I'll do that..You know, you're a really great guy, friend too."
"I know" Lance and JC laughed and then they went to bed.
As JC lie in his bed thinking, he couldn't get Jen off his mind. If only he'd known sooner that he loved her. She'd always just been Joe's little sister...

~*Flashback*~
JC laid in his bed, staring out the window looking at the stars. It had only been a month since Joe and his parents died, but it seemed like it was just yesterday, they were playing basketball outside, arguing over what the score was. Jc often laid looking at the stars thinking about what he had said right before Joe got on the plane.
"I hope your plane crashes!" JC had said jokingly.
"Me too!" Joe played along. Joe was disappointed that he had to leave. 2 weeks at grandmas with nothing, and no best buddy to be bored with him.
"Well you know I love you man and i'm gonna miss you.....have a great time buddy....don't have too much fun."
"Yea yea....love ya too...you're not gonna get all sentimental and crap now are you?"
"Nah...I'll see you in a couple weeks man!"
"Bye"
"Bye"
And those were the last words that Joe and JC had ever spoken to each other. The words *I hope your plane crashes* always haunted JC. *How could I have said something like that?!*
"J bear?"
"Yea Jen.." JC knew exactly what she was going to ask.
"Can I sleep in here with you? Please?"
"Had another one of those dreams?"
"yea" she said tears starting to form.
"Sure sweetie.....crawl in." JC held open the blankets on his bed until she got in. Jen hugged him.
"I don't know what I'd do with out you...." Every so often Jen would come in and sleep with him. JC knew exactly why too. Jen would have dreams, bad dreams, about her brother and mom and dad. She described it to him once. She said it was like they were on the plane and all she had to do was reach out and touch their hands, and they would live. But every time she didn't reach far enough, no matter how hard she tried, and they all turned to dust. Anytime she had a dream like that, it scared her and she'd have to sleep in JC's arms. JC could feel the soft beating of her heart and the hear her soft breathing, and he knew she was asleep.
"I don't know what I'd do without you either...." He whispered softly. And it was true.

*There is no one in this world
Who can love me like you do
That is the reason that,
I want to spend forever with you*

~*End Flashback*~

JC woke up to the smell of pancakes and bacon. He was regreting the day, Jen hated him, and Justin was....Justin was just Justin. No other way to explain it. JC forced himself out of his bed and down the stairs to the kitchen where Jen and Justin were making breakfast. Jen turned around to see who it was, but quickly turned to Justin when she noticed it was JC. Justin shook his head at JC and kissed Jen. *UGH! How can she believe him over me?!* JC asked himself. Lance walked in the kitchen and whispered in JC's ear. "Justin is going out at 2....alone."
Jc nodded at Lance. "Thanks man...but I don't know how I'm going to get her to come with me...it's-" Jens soft giggling broke into JC's train of thought.

Later Jen was alone in the living room while Justin was in the shower. JC walked in and sat down next to her.
"You know im sorry for-" Jen got up while JC was mid sentence.
"Would you just stay and listen to me Jen?!"
"Why so you can tell me more lies?! You know JC I thought I could trust you! I thought you'd always be here for me....or was that a lie too?"
"Look I know what I did was wrong! And I want to make it up to you... Just come with me later ok?" Jen could see he was desperate....that look he always gave her she couldn't resist.
"Alright....."

*I'll be loving you forever
Deep inside my heart you'll leave me never
Even if you took my heart and tore it apart,
I would love you still forever.
And girl I pray you leave me never.*

"I'm leaving baby...I'll miss you, I'll be back later" Justin walked in and kissed her goodbye. JC cringed. When Justin walked out the door and pulled away JC grabbed Jen.
"We gotta go... NOW!"
"J bear! I'm not done playing this... cmon I'm beating Joey! Lemme finish."
"No we gotta go now! We'll be late!"
"It's ok, I promised Lance and Megan I'd go shopping with them" Joey told Jen. He could see the strain in JC's face and thought it'd be best if they cut the game short before JC exploded. Jen and JC ran out the door and hopped in the car.
"So where are you taking me?"
"I'm not sure yet....there he is..."
"Who?"
"Oh nevermind." JC's mind raced as he followed Justin's car. Keeping a safe distance between them so both Jen and Justin wouldn't notice. *I've got to be right, but if i'm not how am I going to explain it to Jen? She'd hate me even more than she already does.* JC saw Justin run into the coffee shop as they drove into the parking lot. *Please be there with her* Jen and JC got out of the car and walked into the big coffee shop. They sat down into a booth and JC glanced over at Justin, sitting alone. JC was facing Justin's way so Jen couldn't see him.
"So....why did you bring me here?"
"I wanted to show you something and apologize for being a jerk and telling you the truth about Justin."
"But it wasn't the truth! I thought we all established that! JC if you just brought me here to try and prove--" she stopped suddenly when JC pointed behind her. She turned around and broke into tears. It was Justin...kissing the other girl. *oh no...JC was right....* she thought to herself. She got up, tears streaming down her face and walked over to Justin's table. "Hey Justin..." she managed to get out between sobs. Justin jumped up.
"I--It's not what you think!"
"What do you mean it's not what I think?! I think you were kissing that girl....so you're saying you weren't!?"
"No no that's not it."
"So you were kissing her!......I've gotta get out of here.." Jen ran out of the shop, leaving Justin standing there.
"So who's she?" the girl asked.
"Oh nobody"
JC got up quickly and ran over to Justin. "Nobody?! You guys have been together for 6 months and you call her 'nobody'? That's real low Justin! Real low...I hope your happy. You broke her heart." Jc ran out hoping to find Jen but she was no where to be found.

*Cause this is the world where lovers often go astray,
but if we love each other we wont go that way.
So put your doubts aside,
Do what it takes to make it right.
Cause I love you forever,
no one can tear us apart*

*Where could she be?* JC asked himself over and over again and then he remembered....

~*Flashback*~
JC had gotten home to an empty house. Jen wasn't there. He had heard what had happened at school that day. Her boyfriend of 2 years had dumped her. He said he 'Just didn't love her anymore'. JC began to get worried so he drove around looking for her. He finally drove past a cliff that no one ever went on to. It was too dangerous. But as he drove by he saw something, a body. He jumped out of the car and the body turned around at the sound of leaves crunching beneath his feet. "Jen" he whispered.
"Go away" she said between sniffs.
"No i'm not going to..." he sat down beside her, feet dangling off the edge of the cliff. "The view here is beautiful... Look how pretty the sunset looks on the water...its like a painting." Jen smiled, she had always loved how JC could make the simplest things like a sunset look so beautiful. "I heard what happened....Are you alright?"
"Yea i'm fine. I just needed to think. I come up here all the time to think. Me and Joe used to come up here together... we'd just sit and watch the sunset. And think...about stuff. Stuff you never really think about." There was a long silence and Jen started crying again.
"Look, you were too good for him.....And besides you've still got me! I'm not much but I guess I'll have to do." JC smiled and Jen chuckled. He could always make her laugh.
"You're not that bad...I guess."
"Oh thanks" JC said sarcastically.
"No I'm just playing J bear....I don't know what I'd do without you.... I just miss Joe sooooo much.." JC wrapped his arms around her and slowly rocked back and forth until the sun went down.
~*End Flashback*~

JC drove to the cliff and sure enough she was there, feet dangling over the edge looking over the water. JC got out and sat down beside her. "You were right....he was cheating on me..but why?" Jen talked as if she were talking to her self. No substance to her voice, it was flat without much effort.
"Look Jen I'm sorry you had to find out this way it's just-"
"No..no don't blame yourself JC. I deserve it for not listening to you, not believing you....I deserve it."
"No, no one deserves to get their heart broken. Look I have something that I have been meaning to tell you for a really long time and I don't know what you're going to say..."
"Go ahead J bear, you know you can tell me anything."
"I-I love you" Jen started to cry and she wrapped her arms around him.
"I thought you'd never say that....I thought you only liked me like a little sister.... I love you too! I have loved you....but I thought that if I told you, it'd destry the relationship we have now.... I do love you." JC smiled and leaned in to kiss her. "I've been waiting for this for a long time...." jen told him and they kissed.

*I'll be loving you forever
Deep inside my heart you'll leave me never
Even if you took my heart and tore it apart,
I would love you still forever.*

To be continued
Maybe :)

Email: lady_bass85@yahoo.com