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Battle Flags

I have no clue why, but I kept seeing this fic run through my mind and had to write it. And it was fun to write, no matter how rediculous it is. And for once...Blob is kinda important...oh wow.

" Oof!" From Blob as he fell face first onto the ground. He sighed, " I hate tires."

He recieved laughs from the other teens in his P.E. class. He growled. His class had to complete some obstacle course, and he was the onyl one who couldn't compelte it. For the most part, he did fairly well, considering his size, but running the tires...was hopeless. He wasn't agile enough.

***Later***

" Ahhhh!" Pietro squealed, leaping onto a hanging tree branch, " That's the biggest dang spider I've ever seen!" He hung himself from his arms, wanting to stomp onto the disgusting arachnid.

" Cool it, Speedy!" Lance warned, " It's just a daddy longlegs. Won't hurt anything. They eat other bugs."

*zip*

" Unless of course, Lance sighed at the sudden event, " Toad eats it first."

Toad grew a wide smile, " That mean ol' spider aint gonna bother you no more."

Oh, my hero!" Pietro swooned sarcastically in a feminine voice.

" Hey, Freddy!" Toad laughed, waving down a miserable Blob. Everyone turned to him. Pietro dropped from the branch.

" What, no hello?" Pietro asked. Blob still had nothing to say. Pietro's smile faded when he saw Evan coming up to him.

" Whattaya want, Daniels?"

Evan, as thought totally forgetting Pietro was his enemy, walked straight up to him and wrapped an arm around the lanky youth's neck and shoulder. Pietro quivered nervously. " Pietro, ol' buddy o'l pal."

" Uhm, Evan," Pietro stammered, " I....have...a girlfriend, y'know. Uhm, you might remember," he tried to gently back away, but Evan had a good grip on him, " Yeah, you remember....uhm..you introduced us. Yes? No? Evan, I'm not....Let me go!"

" Touchy, aren't we, Pietro. I didn't come over here to hit on ya. I'm totally into young ladies myself. I wan wondering if you were up for some fun and friendly compitition."

" You challenging me, Daniels?"

" I'd hope so."

" What you got in mind?"

Evan smiled. He knew his rival so well. The word "challege" would melt Pietro his Evan's hands like butter in a microwave. " Why not a game of Capture the Flag?"

" We don't have a flag." Toad pointed out.

" We make them," Lance explained.

" No powers allowed, or the team is disqualified," Evan interrupted. The Brotherhood glanced at him. " No powers," he repeated. " Just skill. So, Pietro, no super speed. Toad, no tongue. Lance, no geographical disturbances. And, Blob......uhm...try not to trounce everything."

" Party pooper," from Lance.

" Hush!" Pietro hissed. " I don't need my powers to take you down, Daniels. We got a deal. Capture the Flag. We'll do it this weekend. But, there is one question I have. Why are you challenging us?"

Evan smiled. " We've been wanting to do it for some time...but we couldn't settle on who got to play and who was on what team. Everyone either didn't want to play or wouldn't agree to the lineup." He looked at the Brotherhood on a whole, " Four of use wanted to play really bad....and, you, Pietro, I know you couldn't resist a challenge. And I knew you'd drag your buddies into it too. I wanna do this thing! And I know my ol' rival wouldn't turn down a chance to make a fool of me."

Pietro smiled proudly. Blob suddenly raised a hand, " What about weapons? Paintballs are expensive."

" Water balloons with coloring," Toad suggested. " Anyone who is hit with the opposing team's balloon is out of the game..a prisoner."

" Settled!" Pietro spit out, " See you this weekend, Daniels."

***Pietro's Room***

" Alright, we need a flag." Lance announced. He was the first to walk into Pietro's room, which seemed to be where they always ended up when they needed to brainstorm. Pietri sat on the corner of his bed and removed his black sneakers. Felt good to take them off after being on his feet all day. He leaned back against his pillows, stretching himself longways along his bed. Toad leaped onto Pietro's deskchair and crouched in it. Blob leaned against the wall and Lance sat on the floor next to the bed. " Pietro, can you doodle the ideas as they come?"

" Ha! I'm supposing next you'll want me to make it...seeing as I'm the only one here who knows how to sew."

" Yeah, probably," Lance admitted, " But, first things first."

Pietro rolled his eyes and relaxed. He picked up his doodling pad and rested it against his legs, which he had brought up to use as his "table." After sharpening his pencil he waved his hands to give the okay. Toad turned and cast out his tongue, turning on Pietro's air conditioner. Seems he was the onyl one privalged enough to have one.

" How about..." Toad began.

" Dude, if you saw Johny Quest, I'm gonna rock you!" Lance warned.

" We need something to represent us" Toad began, " and I wasn't going to say Johny Quest."

" Keep in mind our budget." Pietro chimed in.

" Why not a gryphon?" Blob shrugged.

" Why?" Lance asked.

" It's a superior animal," Toad explained. Powerful and majestic."

Lance was about to shoot an evil remark at Toad at it, but Pietro quickly spurted out, " Fine. That's great." He sketched it, " But, it too plain."

" Excalibur," Lance suggested.

" Eh?" From Pietro.

" King Arthur's sword. Excalibur. We are the Brotherhood of Mutants. Excalibur was a great symbol for the Knights of the Round Table, their Brotherhood. Why not ours?"

Pietro arched a brow and sketched it. " I like it. A symbol to live and die by."

‘ I dunno about die! Toad chuckled. Pietro turned the sketch for everyone to see...a Gryphon with Excalibur resting across its chest.

***That Weekend***

" How'd they beat us here?" Toad asked as the Brotherhood approached the meeting point. No one answered him.

" Guten tag!" Kurt called, seeing them coming. The X-side had chosen it's four players. Kurt and Evan were obviously part of the team. The Red Team. Kitty had agreed to come as well. And Rogue had wanted to join too. That was Team Red. Red balloons with red dye. The Brotherhood was the Blue Team.

" Ah'ed thought you'd never get here!" Rogue smiled.

" We were told 8:30!" Pietro argued. The Red Team grew pale and turned evily to Evan.

" 8:30?! Like, we've been here since the butt crack of dawn, Evan! Why do they get to sleep in?!"

" Calm down, Kitty," Kurt tried to soothe.

" Give me a break!" Evan pleaded.

" Enough!" Rogue hissed, " Ah wanna get started!"

" We don't have a ref," Blob observed.

" We don't need a ref!" Lance scolded.

" No!" Pietro shouted, shutting them both up, " He's right, Lance. Did anyone even bother to get a ref?"

=I am the referee= came a telepathic reply. =Trust me, I'll be fair.=

" Freaky," Toad whispered, hearing Xavier's mental reply.

" Fine, now let's do a rundown," Evan began, but then smirked at Pietro. He waved his hand aside as to say, " You do the honors."

Pietro took the honors, " No powers, no cheating. Any attempts to do either or both will result in disqualification and the opposite team wins by default. First team to capture the opposing team's flag and report to the neutral home base wins the game."

" Any member hit by the opposing team's balloons is out of the game and becomes a ‘prisoner.'" Evan chimed in. " We are relying totally on skill and team work."

" Both teams are set up?" Pietro continued, " Both teams report back to their flags. At 9 a.m. on the button, we dispatch to capture the other team's flag. One member of each team, however must guard the flag at base." Pietro looked around, " And I nominate Blob."

" Great," Evan replied, " And I'll nominate myself to guard our flag."

" Wunderbar!" Kurt cheered, " Let's get started!"

" Ah'm up for that!" Rogue agreed. When the Red Team headed back to their flag, Blob approached Pietro, " Why am I guarding the flag?"

" No offense, Blob," Pietro waved, " But we need a swift team. And let's face it, your our slowest member. You're better suited to guard our flag."

" Get Toad to do it!"

" We're gonna need Toad in the field!" Pietro argued, " He's the smallest and can get into places we may not be able to."

Toad smiled. It felt good to be needed. Blob sighed in defeat. They headed back to the flag to wait for Dispatch.

***On the Field***

Both teams raced through the woods. Each side wanted to be avoided, yet desperately wanted to wack the opposing side with a balloon.

First to face of was Kitty and Lance. Both inched around a tree. Then, without warning, Lance swung himself around and smashed a balloon in her hair. Blue ooze dripped from her locks.

" Ooooh!" She growled, " That was, like, so totally Bumsville."

Lance cackled wildly until...

*Splat*

a balloon hit him in the back of the head. He growled in defeat...and Kitty got the last laugh. Both teams lost a player. Kitty peeked behind Lance and saw Kurt laughing in a tree.

" Nice shot, Kurt!"

" Ja!" He replied, " Danke. I'd say so!"

Unfortunately, he didn't notice the figure approaching on a nearby branch. Kurt fell backwards, dodging a balloon.

" Drat!" Toad cried out, letting out an annoyed sigh. Kurt ran off in a flash.

Speaking of flash...Pietro had managed to find the Red Team's flag. He peeked cautiously from behind a tree. No sign of Evan. That was certainly odd.

" Grrrr." He heard. He turned and saw an aggitated Toad approaching.

" Man, don't scare me like that. Where do we stand?"

" Blob at the flag. Me and you here and Lance is a prisoner."

" And them?"

" Fuzzboy ran off. I didn't see which way he went. Kitty is out...our prisoner....and I've not seen Evan or Rogue."

" Darn!" Pietro hissed, " C'mon, Evan, we're not gonna pull this tactic, are we?"

" Eh?" From a confused Toad.

" When we were eight, Evan and I went to summer camp together. We ended up playing Capture the Flag that summer. About half my team was taken out by ‘snipers.' Crafty tactic."

" We better keep an eye out." Toad smiled. A balloon flew past his head. It missed and hit a tree.

" Ambush!" Pietro cried. Balloons began to fly. Evan tossed a balloon at Pietro's feet, which he dodged. However, Kurt swung down from a branch hit him with a counter balloon.

" I can't believe you lost to me again with the same tactic, Pietro!" Evan laughed.

" We're not beat yet!" Pietro laughed, " Toad, retreat!"

" Don't have to tell me twice!" Toad retorted as he zipped off. He was closely followed by Kurt. In a desperate attempt to get away, Toad skipped straight up, turning around almost gracefully, landing on his toes, and smashing a balloon square into Kurt's fuzzy face. Blue ooze mixed with his blue fur.

***Blue Team's Flag***

" This is stupid!" Blob sighed. He kicked a rock. He was bored and missing everything! He had no clue where either team stood. He heard noises. He picked up a balloon and readied himself to throw. But, he recognized those thumps.

" Toad?"

Toad leaped in front of him and panted, " We're it, Pal. Lance and Pietro were oozed."

‘ What about..."

" Two and two. Evan and Rogue are all that's left on the Red Team and we're all that's left on the Blue Team. I barely managed to get away. I know where the flag is. But, I'm gonna need your help."

" What about..."

" Forget our flag. They're across the woods. And, I got a plan."

" They'll be expecting you, Toad," Blob said with some amoutn of intelligence, " Better take a rear route."

Toad agreed.

***Later***

" Figures they'd put an X on their flag." Toad chuckled. " But, what's that in the center?"

" A pinwheel and a snail." Blob replied casually. The flag had several defenses. Barbed wire rested around it....and....tires.

" No! Why tires?!" Blob whispered in a whine.

" I got a plan!" Toad assured. Blob couldn't stop him. He had leaped out of the cover too fast. He headed straight for the flag. As Blob had expected, Toad was seen and was being chased down by Evan and Rogue. He turned around swiftly, knowing that he'd never be able to grab the flag with Evan pulling up so close. He tossed a balloon and was able to hit Evan with it. But, at the same time, a balloon hit him.

" Where'd that come from?" He asked, rubbing the red ooze from the back of his head.

" Ah got you, Swamp Thing." Rogue called. With, what seemed like, no more players, Rogue headed off to find the Blue Team's flag and casually walk it back to the neutral base. Her only obstacle would be to take down Blob, who she thought was still guarding the flag. She had no idea that he was right at her feet under heavy brush. When Rogue had run off and Evan and Toad walked slowly back to the neutral base to meet the others, Blob ever so casually walked out, picked up the flag, and followed close behind.

***Home base***

Rogue ran in proudly, " Ah got the flag!" She looked at theoozed prisoners. They arched their brows. " Something wrong? Ah haven't been hit."

" Did you notice anything odd when you captured Blue Team's flag?" Evan asked accusingly. Rogue turned to the Blue Team...Toad, Pietro and Lance, all having wide and proud smiles on their faces.

" It was a little easy," Rogue commented, " Did Ah miss something?"

Blob suddenly walked into the room with a large sandwich and set it on the table. Rogue noticed the table-cloth, which wasn't there when she had dispatched that morning. It was meduim sized, with a X...in the center...a pinwheel...and...a snail? The Red Team's flag!

" Blob got here about an hour ago," Lance chuckled.

" Wha--?"

" You got me!" Toad laughed, " But, Blob was hiding behind me in the bushes."

" Huh?"

Toad smiled proudly. " When Pietro got hit, I took off. I knew there was no way I was gonna get past you guys by myself. Pity you guys think less of me. You two guarded your flag, expecting me to come back after collecting myself. And, I knew you two would never expect Blob to leave that flag." Toad stopped a moment to take a sip of his drink. After wetting his whistle, he continued explaining his plan, " I ran and got Blob and came back to your flag. You expected just me. Once you thought there was no one left to capture your flag, I knew you'd make way for ours, expecting to easily take down Freddy boy." He turned to Blob, " I had it all figured."

" I thought he was just being idiotic," Blob admitted. Toad shook his head. " With me hit," he corrected, " Rogue, you went after our flag, just as I'd expected. You never even thought there was the possibility we were bold enough to leave our flag unguarded. So, Blob simply had to walk in and pick up your flag, with no opposition in his way."

Rogue's mouth dropped open in disbelief. Blob had beat her!

" So," Evan sighed, " Now what do we do?" Pietro turned to him slyly, " I got an idea."

He zipped behind Rogue and dragged her outside. Everyone ran after him, not knowing what he was trying to do. In the next instant, between both teams, leftover balloons flew every which way. By the time the day was over, both teams were a Red and Blue mess.

END

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