The story now restarts about two hours later at the Costa Ls Sol Bar. Reeve is awake again…in some respect. He’s not all there because he decided to drown away his sorrows about losing Aeris to Sephrioth in alcohol. At this rate, he’s (drunk, plastered, hammered, intoxicated, blood-in-his-alcohol-system…you get the idea.) Now begins our story.

Bartender: You okay over there, sir?

Reeve: (In a slurred voice) Yeaaah…I’mmm Fine. I just had the worst day of my life so it can only get betterrr froom here, right?

Bartender: Oh come on, don’t let it get to you. There are plenty of women out there who would kill for a guy like you. So stop beating yourself up about the way she treated you.

Reeve: (Crying) no, she was the best and most beautiful woman I ran across. She took a washed up former executive like me and made me into a super-hero. I’m nothing without her (sinks his head into the table and begins bawling).

Bartender: That’s not true. You are ALWAYS somebody, with or without a “significant other.” If she fell for you once, she must have seen that. Very few women date guys that feel that they “must” have a significant other to survive. Come on, if you really love her, you can’t be all that sad to see her go.

Reeve: (Still crying) yes, I have to respect her decision. But why Sephrioth of all people. He KILLED HER for heaven’s sake. And yet she sees no harm in beating the crap outta me and ditching me for him. WHY! I was afraid that something like this would happen. I knew that a goddess like Aeris could never fall for me for long. But why did the breakup have to be THIS hard.

Bartender: OH COME ON! So what are you gonna do about it? Are you gonna just sit here and continue to be the wimp that they both claim that you are? Or are you gonna move on with your life or at least do something about it?

Reeve: (Stops crying and attempts to stand up.) I’m gonna do something about it. I’m gonna heave hall hover hephiroth. (Try’s to leave, but passes out as soon as he takes one step.)

Bartender: You don’t need to be going anywhere except to your room. (Attempts to lift Reeve up but notices that his breathing is very irregular and fading.) Hey sir, are you all right? (No response, of course.) Hey, how much did this guy have to drink?

Customer: Well, in addition to the four beers that he brought from you, he also drank that lady’s strawberry daiquiri that she never got around to drinking. In addition, he drank the half filled mugs of thirty people who left to go to the dance, in addition to ten shot glasses also left by people who left to go to the dance.

Bartender: Well, this guy must have killed off about half of the brain cells in his head and probably does not have a liver at this point. This guy has alcohol poisoning. CALL AN AMBULANCE, NOW!

Customer: Don’t bother. I have heal materia. This should remove the ailments from him. (Uses it and, true to his word, Reeve’s breathing becomes regular and he even wakes up, completely sober without even a hangover.) You okay, buddy?

Reeve: Yeah, I guess so, what happened?

Customer: You almost died.

Reeve: Really? I actually drank THAT much?

Bartender & Customer: YA THINK?

Reeve: Well, since it’s apparently over with Aeris, I may as well talk to her and tell her that there is no hard feelings. Hey guys thanks for everything.

Customer: Hey sir, don’t give up. Who knows, maybe she’s not doing this willingly. She could have been manipulated. Hey, you owe it to yourself to not beat yourself up about it and find out why she REALLY left you fort that silver-hared guy. And if you discover foul play, you owe it to all underdogs who always have to see the jock get the girl to PUNISH HIM! Hey, good luck, sir.

Reeve: Thanks for the words of encouragement. Well, I’m off. (Leaves the Bar and heads for the dance.)

Bartender: That was good of you to say, kid. Say, what are you doing here anyway? You haven’t ordered a drink all night.

Customer: Well I’m actually too young to drink. I’m just traveling around aimlessly. In fact, I’d better get going.

Bartender: Good night. Hey kid, that guy might want to know whom you are when he returns. After all, you DID save his life. So, who are you?

Customer: (Heading out the door.) The name’s Anton. (Vanishes.)

The setting is now at the dance. The main contests have mostly passed and they are now mostly playing slow music. Needless to say, Aeris and Sephrioth are sharing a beautiful moment together dancing.

Sephy: Hey Aeris. How would you like to come back with me to Jen’s page when my vacation’s over? Whadda ya say? (He’s still holding the manipulate materia, remember.)

Aeris: (In a dreamy voice.) Well that sounds just delightful Sephy. Of course I’ll go anywhere with you.

Sephy: Wonderful. Hey, wait here, I got something for ya. (Heads off and Reeve shows up.)

Aeris: What do you want, loser. Can’t stand the fact that I found better? Some men just don’t know when to give up.

Reeve: No Aeris. I just came to say that I always respected your decisions for your happiness. If you think that you can be happier with Sephrioth that I’ll…stand by your choice.

Aeris: (Sweetly) you know what would make me happy right now?

Reeve: What?

Aeris: (In a furious tone) THAT YOU WOULD CEASE TO EXIST IN MY LIFE. YOU’VE BEEN AN OBSTACLE TO MY HAPPINESS FOR FAR TOO LONG, REEVE. (Gets up & pulls out the Princess Guard {don’t ask me how she carried it in her swimsuit and grass skirt} and gets in a fighting stance.) I GUESS I’LL PROVIDE MYSELF WITH SOME RELIEF. PREPARE YOURSELF, REEVE, PREPARE TO BECOME ONE WITH THE PLANET.

Reeve: (Shocked, wondering how to defend himself without hurting Aeris. Suddenly, he’s thinking.) Wait a minute. “Become one with the planet?” Aeris doesn’t say that. But SEPHRIOTH DOES! She IS being manipulated. (Just ducks a swing from Aeris’ staff.) Not that knowing that helps me out right now.

Sephy: HAHAHA! Can’t you see, Reeve. YOU CAN’T WIN!

(Just then Reeve casts a sleep spell on Aeris which works and puts her to sleep.)

Sephy: Wait, where did you get that materia?

Reeve: Some idiot, don’t know who he or she is, left it in the store I went in earlier today. I owe him one.

Sephy: (Pissed off. So much so that his Mansamune appears in a flash of light. He connects his manipulate materia to it.) THAT’S IT. YOU’RE BEGINNING TO RUIN EVERYTHING. TIME TO PERMENTALLY TAKE YOU OUT OF THE EQUATION. PREPARE TO DIE!

Reeve: Isn’t that “Become one with the planet “ to you?

Sephy: You think that this is funny, huh? Well LAUGH AT THIS. (Slashes at Reeve, just barely missing him.)

Reeve: (Pulls out the Supershot ST {he’s not wearing a swimsuit} and tries to fire, but can’t seem to get a clear shot.) You are PATHETIC! Having to use manipulate materia to get a girl. You’re nothing but an amateur.

Sephy: HOW DARE YOU! (Does a wide swing that embeds the Mansamune right in front of the barrel of Reeve’s Shotgun.) #@$!

(Reeve fires the shotgun, shattering the Mansamune to a stub.)

Sephy: (Teardrops) MY BABY! MY PRECIOUS SWOWD! THAT’S IT! (Drops into a fighting stance.) Put em up.

Reeve: (Gets into a boxing stance.) BRING IT!

(Reeve, having taken some boxing lessons when younger, is actually doing a much better job than Sephrioth anticipated. Sephy, on the other hand, is used to fighting with a sword and thus has little, if any, experience with arm to arm combat, is getting a major and WELL-DESERVED beating.)

Reeve: (With only a few small bruises.) Give up, LOSER?

Sephy: (With a black eye and a few broken teeth.) NEVER! Not until I put somewhere like you where you belong…DEPRESSED AND WALLOWING IN SELF PITY!

Reeve: (Evades a punch from Sephy but in the process trips over something and falls on his back.) Oh no!

Sephy: (Puts his foot on Reeve’s chest and pulls out a stubby broken-off dagger that was once the Mansamune. Observes it.) Not to my usual liking… (Looks at Reeve) But it’ll do for now. (Is about to stab Reeve when he suddenly feels something hard slamming up against his side which sends him flying across the beach. Sephy looks up and sees a very wide-awake and VERY pissed off Aeris with the Princess Guard.)

Aeris: YOU WOMANIZING PUNK! HOW DARE YOU MANIPULATE ME! PREPARE FOR YOUR PUNISHMENT!

(Aeris beats the stuffing outta Sephrioth. In the end, Sephrioth is lying on his back and Aeris is standing right on top of him, Princess Guard aimed downward.)

Aeris: Oh, one more thing. I never did properly reward you for killing me.

(Aeris continuously pounds Sephrioth in the head with the Princess Guard until ten minutes AFTER he passes out.)

Aeris: What should we do with him, Reeve?

Reeve: (Pulls out size materia.) I have an idea .

Ten minutes later…

(Sephrioth wakes up in a very dark and enclosed area apparently with round walls.)

Sephy: Ugh…what happened…where am I.

(Hears a voice outside.)

Reeve: He’s loaded and ready to go.

Aeris: FIRE!

Sephy: (Looks at the entrance, sees the sky, and realizes that he’s in the barrel of Reeve’s shotgun.) OH @#! %! (Gets blasted high up into the stratosphere until he vanishes in a flash of light.)

Aeris: Reeve…I’m sorry for all the things that I said and done to you. (Slow music plays in the background.) Say, may I have this dance?

Reeve: Let me get back to you on that (pause) okay, sure. (They begin dancing.) Don’t worry about it Aeris, I know you were being manipulated.

Aeris: Was that before or after you found out about the manipulate materia?

Reeve: (Pauses, then blushes in embarrassment.) (Sigh) after.

Aeris: (Gives him a dark look.) And why was that? You should know by now Reeve that I consider you one of the finest people that I met. I’m concerned about more than how a man looks on the outside. I want someone who is kind, giving, and compassionate, some who is a friend first, in other words. And don’t worry, even if I was just concerned with looks, you would still pass.

Reeve: (Blushing out of a different type of embarrassment now.) Umm…thank you. (Looks into her eyes.) Thank you for always giving me the confidence I need to go on. I love you, Aeris.

Aeris: (Kisses Reeve on the cheek.) I love you too. (Gives him a dark look.) And don’t EVER doubt it.

Reeve: Never again, because I know that if I do, you’ll beat some sense into me. And I learned that I definitely cannot beat you in a fight.

Aeris: (Chuckles, then pulls him closer to her.) Kiss me. (Well, you can guess what happens next.)

THE END

EPILOGUE:

The setting is now the Ramble Room in Jen’s page. The Turks and Rufus are pacing around wondering what Jen has in store for them next. Reno is just finishing up on a computer.

Rude: What were you doing on the computer, Reno?

Reno: Sending out e-mail.

Elena: To whom?

Reno: (Sweatdrop) don’t worry about it. (Hears screaming in the background.) Hmm…what’s that?

Suddenly poor Sephy, who has grown back to full size at this point, comes crashing through the ceiling of the Ramble Room and crashes on his couch, smashing it.

Rude: (Observes Sephy’s injuries, which are still there, and his broken Mansamune.) @!#$, who did this to you?

Sephy: (Moaning) ..Re..ee..ve.

Everyone else looks at each other, and then falls over laughing.

Jen: (Comes into the ramble room and fists her hand on her hips.) HEY, WHAT’S GOING ON HERE. (Sees Sephrioth) woah, what happened?

Sephy: Jen, do me a favor.

Jen: Such as…

Sephy: Never send me on vacation AGAIN!

Jen: (Very pleased, so much so that she throws her arms around him.) Oh Sephy, you are such a hard and determined worker. Why can’t I have my OTHER workers do that. (She’s glaring at the others, but especially at Reno & Rufus.)

THE TRUE END

Author’s notes: Well that just about covers it. And as I said, good prevailed in the end. A few people I forgot to thank about this. My college that held a Tiki dance. That gave me the perfect setting for the Costa La Sol party, even though Reeve missed most of it. And again, thanks to Jen for posting this. See, I told you Sephrioth would be returned (I didn’t say safe & sound, though .) I think I covered a majority of the thanks in the first installment. So this should cover everybody. Oh, wait. And thank you, the reader, for reading this. That should do it. Good day to all of you. Well time to give my fingers a rest & check my e-mail. Hmm…one from some Reno guy…

Anton