Children in the dark causes accidents... accidents in the dark causes children!
Pay attention; you know you'll have to pay either way.
It's hard to work in Groups when you are omniscient.
Violence is not the Answer. Violence is the Question, Yes is the answer.
My indecision is final.
Join the Army, meet interesting people, kill them.
Drugs may lead to nowhere, but at least it's the scenic route.
Rap is to music, what Etch-a-Sketch is to art.
I've got plenty of common sense! I just choose to ignore it.
Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day. Give him a religion, and he'll starve to death praying for a fish
Even if the voices aren't real, they have some damn good ideas
I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me
Never knock on Death's door. Just ring his doorbell and run. He HATES that.
Some people have a way with words, while others... erm... thingy.
Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.
Help Wanted: Telepath. You know where to apply.
Nobody can be exactly like me. Even I have trouble doing it.
You can't have everything... where would you put it?
We have enough youth, how about a fountain of Smart.
Analysing humour is like analysing a frog: you can do it, but the frog tends to die in the process.
"There is no free lunch." From an immigrant when asked what he had learned from his 4-years experience in America.
"Love, truth, and beauty are products of consciousness." J. Jaynes
"God does not strike people dead the way he used to for lying. If he did where would I be? I'll tell you where I'd be. I'd be here preaching to an empty church." An old preacher
"Ninety percent of the work done in this country is done by people who don't feel good." Theodore Roosevelt
"Be grateful for luck. Pay the thunder no mind. Listen to the birds and don't hate nobody." Eubie Blake, a ragtime pianist who died at age 100 in 1983.
Real life is weird, because [unlike in chat rooms] you can't boot people. -Jae
Isn't it scary how we know how to use our computers better than our phones? - Jae
Always listen to experts. They'll tell you what can't be done, and why. Then do it.
Get a shot off fast. This upsets him long enough to let you make your second shot perfect.
There is no conclusive evidence of life after death. But there is no evidence of any sort against it. Soon enough you will know. So why fret about it?
Delusions are often functional. A mother's opinions about her children's beauty, intelligence, goodnes, etcetera ad nauseam, keep her from drowning them at birth.
What a wonderful world it is that has girls in it!
Never crowd youngsters about their private affairs--sex especially. When they are growing up, they are nerve ends all over, and resent (quite properly) any invasion of their privacy. Oh, sure, they'll make mistakes--but that's their business, not yours. (You make your own mistakes, did you not?)
Do not handicap your children by making their lives easy.
You live and learn. Or you don't live long.
A competent and self-conscious person is incapable of jealousy in anything. Jealousy is invariabley a symptom of neurotic insecurity.
Beware of altruism. It is based on self-deception, the root of all evil.
The second most preposterous notion is that copulation is inherently sinful.
Of all the strange "crimes" that human beings have legislated out of nothing, "blashphemy" is the most amazing-with "obscenity" and "indecent exposure" fighting it out for second and third place.
If you don't like yourself, you can't like other people.
"God split himself into a myriad parts that he might have friends." This may not be true, but it sounds good, and is no sillier than any other theology.
The greatest productive force is human selfisness.
Yield to temptation; it may not pass your way again.
Sin lies only in hurting people unnecessarily. All other "sins" are invented nonsense. (Hurting yourself is not sinful- just stupid.)
Do not confuse "duty" with what other people expect of you; they are utterly different. Duty is a debt you owe to yourself to fulfill obligations you have assumed voluntarily. Paying that debt can entail anything from years of patient work to an instant willingness to die. Difficult it may be, but the reward is self respect.
But there is no reward at all for doing what other people expect of you, and to do so is not merely difficult, but impossible. It is easier to deal with a footpad than it is with the leech who wants "just a few minutes of your time, please- this won't take long." Time is your total, and the minutes of your life are painfully few. If you find yourself falling int o the vice of agreeing to such requests, they will quickly snowball to the point where these parasites will use up 100 percent of your time- and squawk for more!
So learn to say No- and to be rude about it when necessary. Otherwise you will not have time to carry out your duty, or to do your own work, and certainly no time for love and happiness. The termites will nibble away your life and leave none of it for you. (This rule does not mean that you must not do a favor for a friend, or even a stranger. But let the choice be yours. Don't do it because it is "expected" of you.)