A girl from Liverpool sits watching Cilla Black on blind date...
Cilla: A lorra lorra laughs 'ere, chuck!
Gez: Yeah and a lorra lorra sluts on the tv too. *click*
*A TV screen fills up with Baywatch models.*
Gez: Oh my god! David Hasslehoff! Swoon!!
*Hearts come out of Gez's head as her phone rings.*
Gez: Yay! A person is calling me!
*Gez runs to the phone and answers it*
Gez: Hello?
WASSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAPPPPP!!!
Gez: WASSSSSSAAAAAAAAPPPPP
WAAAAAAASSSSSSSPPPPPPPP
Gez: Wasp?
YEAH CHUCK! A LORRA LORRA WASSSSSSPSSSSS!
Gez: Oh god! Cilla Black? How the hell did you get my number?
Cilla: Well your mate Carlie started spamming, which was silly! And we got your number! And you do sound like a male! Would you like to come on the show?
Gez: GET BENT!
*The phone slams, Gez is furious*
Gez: Ohhh that bitch is gonna die!!!
*A furious Gez stomps out of Liverpool and gets a car and rides to Middlesborough...*
*A house in Middlesbrough.......*
Carlie:Oh! My superduper ultra mega shiny new happy nokia 7890787987342875903725904237302 with changeable cover, ringtone, icons, coffee maker and umbrella attachment is ringing! I wonder who it could be!
*Picks up phone* WHASSSUUUUUUUUUP!
Caller:WHAAASSSUUUUUUUP!
Carlie:WHAAAAAA-SSUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP!
Caller:WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSS
Carlie:UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP
Caller:WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Carlie:SUU-Wait a minute, who are you?
Caller:*heavy breathing sounds* FSHHHH, Carlie.... FSHHHHHH, *Darth Vader voice* I am your father...
Carlie:Gez, is that you?
Gez:What?!?!? How the ^(^&*(&^(*&^*in' hell did you know?
Carlie:you're the only one dumb enough to pull something like this.
Gez :^&*(^(*.
Carlie: And you sound like a guy. Hey! Cilla Black phoned you didn't she?
Gez-^&*^*(&^&*^(&*^*&(^(*&!!!!!!! *hangs up.*
*A loud thump sounds at Carlies door*
Carlie: Oh who could that be?
*She opens the door to see Gez with a chainsaw.*
Carlie: Ohhhhh, shit...
*She runs upstairs to see a very angry Gez ripping through her carpet*
Carlie: Wahhhhhhhhhhhh!!!! Must save nokia!!
*She runs to her room and shuts the door*
Carlie: Phew!
*The chainsaw cuts through the door.*
Gez: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! HERES A LORRA LORRA LAUGHS!!
Carlie: oh mother of mercy forgive me for spamming......
*her nokia rings and she answers it.*
Carlie: He...hello?
Caller:...What's your favourite scary movie?
Carlie:...G...Gez?
Caller:No...not Gez...
Carlie: Who...who...are...you?
caller:I'M CILLA CHAN!! AHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!
*Chainsaw noises are heard behind her door as Gez's manly screams are turned to whimpers as blood soaks the door.*
Carlie: OH MY GOD!!
Cilla-chan: Oh yes carlie! and we are coming for ALL THE FIC LIST!! A HAHAHAHAHAH!!
Carlie: Nooooooo!!!
*Carlie takes her nokia and uses the umbrella function to break from her room.*
Carlie: Mommy!!!! *Cilla's cackles can be heard from town to town as carlie runs...* TO BE CONTINUED...