[outside the golden gates]

Emerald; Vacations where I wanna be... party on the beach where the fun is free...

Carmilla; Emerald...

Emerald; We don't need a holiday-ee to start to celebra-eet...

Carmilla; Emerald, why is your throat still working?

Emerald; Wibble?

Carmilla; Yes, I know its had years of practise, but why is it still working when we were just violently stabbed and slashed and dismembered and killed to death?

Emerald; Wibble?

Carmilla; ...And why have you stopped bleeding? And why are these walls all white? And what are those gold ga...

Emerald; Too many questions! TOO MANY QUESTIONS! *head explodes*

Carmilla; Ick! All over my new shirt and all.

Emerald; *head promptly reappears* Don't shout at me mummy, I only ate the rainbow-colour mushrooms! *faints*

Carmilla; There's something not quite right here, and it isn't Emerald, or the distinct lack of anyone in this area owning a mobile phone despite me needing one to ask for help from Crunchbucket...

[hole opens up underneath Carmilla]

Carmilla; Darn. I knew mobile phones were the weapons of Satan. *falls out of sight*

[Sephiroth walks in]

Emerald; I fell on my bottom.

Sephiroth; *tilts head* Wibble?

Emerald; *tilts head* Wibble, wibble?

Sephiroth; WIBBLE!

[runs over to Emerald as romantic music strikes up. Meanwhile...]

Carmilla; Where am I?

[A whirlwind of white-blonde hair rushes past, and crashes into a nearby wall]

Carmilla; Uh-oh. Whatever that was, it looked familiar.

[the whirlwind dusts itself off]

Whirlwind of white-blonde hair; CARMILLAAAAAA!!!

Carmilla; Aaaaaargh! I know I lived a sinful life in secret, I know I shot JFK despite being born over a decade after he died, I know I designed the national curriculum, but please, PLEASE not her!

Whirlwind of white-blonde hair; Oh, but CARMILLA, you know I want you wrapped up for christmas like I told you last year!

Carmilla; *shudder* Can things possibly get any worse?

[random stranger walks in]

Random stranger; Hello Mrs Gates! How's the baby?

[random stranger walks out]

Carmilla; AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!!!