Leon's Bad, Bad, EXTREMILLY Bad day MST!
By QuistisChick

The famous fan fic author QuistisChick ::after several muffled laughs, boos, and a few items thrown at her, QC continues to write:: is joined by Ada Wong, Aeris Gainsborough, Cloud Strife, and Cid Highwind to MST this disgrace to fan fiction. As usual, such horrid work was found at FanFiction.net. Let's continue . . .

>>Disclaimer:I do not own Resident Evil 2

Cloud: Wait a second! He wrote a fan fic about a game he doesn't own? How?!
Ada: He probably just wanted to fit in, thus rented the game, played it for four seconds, and wrote this peice of garbage.
Cloud: . . . Oh.

>>Censor:PG-13

Cid: #$^&@!!!! PG-13?! That's ^*&@(%^ ridiculous!
Aeris: Why, because everything will be censored?
Cid: Hell yes!

>>Reason:Some minor cussing and a shower scene.!_!

QC: Oh, there you go Cid.
Cid: $%*^$*)$^*$#)*!!!
Ada: . . . cringe . . .
QC: What's wrong?
Ada: Shower scene . . . Leon . . .
Others: . . . cringe . . .

>>Genre:Humor

QC: Sweet! And I was beginning to think this fic was supposed to funny. Now I just know it will be! It says so right there, it's a Humor story!
Cloud: Oh good! More embaressing, total re-writes of the character's personallities to try to get a cheap laugh!

>>Title:Leon's Bad,Bad,EXTREMELY Bad day.

Aeris: You think he's gonna have a bad day?
Cloud: Hmmm, I dunno . . .

>>Author:Heero 195

QC: Ah hell. Great. An anime pen name! You know what that means . .
Ada: (Leon) NOOOO! I won't let you destroy Raccoon City! ::hops in giant mecha:: Feel the power of the Super Destructo-Mobile Unit 0089!!
Aeris: (Claire) Leon, you ecchi! ::whips out mallet, bonking Leon on the head:: Silly otaku!
Cloud: (Leon) ::summons a giant ball of energy:: Foolish Saiyan zombies! Feel my WRATH! ::shoots 1.4 million zombies at once, causing the world to explode, but still manages to survive::
QC: What fun!!

>>It is 8:00 A.M.,Leon S. Kennedy is in bed.He is having a sweet dream of of Claire and him having...well,you know

Aeris: Having what? Tea?
Cid: TEA?! Where?!
Aeris: Um, never mind . . .

>>0_o.

Aeris: 0_o

>>Suddenly,his alarm clock goes off.

Cloud: DUCK! ::hides behind QC::
QC: (Leon) DAMN! Right when I finally get to score with an "actual" WOMAN . . .
Ada: (Claire) Yes, that WOULD be a change from the norm.
QC: (Chris Redfield) Yeah no kidding! My ass is sore . . .

>>Leon:Ahhhhh!!!!That stupid clock scared me!

Cloud: (Leon) Dammit, I crapped myself!
Others: . . .
QC: Um, just nothing you can add to that, really. . .

>>As Leon got out of bed,he hit his toe on the foot of the bed.

QC: (Leon) Gee, I've had my arm gnawed off by rampaging zombies, but this hurts like HELL!

>>Leon:OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

QC: See?
Ada: (Leon) Damn! Now I can't shave my legs properly!
QC: Um, why would that affect his ability to shave?
Ada: . . . Shut up! I was just trying to make him sound gay!
Cloud: Oh don't worry, between regular Leon and this guy's version of Leon, we got our work cut out for us.

>>When Leon was hopping on one foot,he tripped on his rug and fell on the floor face first.

Leon:I need a damn shower.

Cid: (Leon) No, not a Band-Aid for my toe, but a shower!
Cloud: Not just any shower, but a damn shower.

>>As Leon went to the stairs to go to the downstairs bathroom for his shower,he tripped on a disconnected telephone line and fell down the stairs.

QC: Now kids, remember, always leave a disconnected phone line lying hazardously at the top of your stairs! Others: Yes teacher!

>>Leon:I HATE THIS!!

Ada: Me too! This fic sucks ass.
QC: No kidding, I mean, this sucks the biggest of the big asses.
Cloud: ::nods:: Oh yeah.

>>Leon got up and went to the bathroom,he did not notice that Sherry was taking a shower.He peeled off his clothes and opened the shower curtains.

Aeris: Put it back on! Put it back on!
QC: He peels off his clothes. Leon's a bannana?
Ada: ::mumbling:: He sucks bannana . . .
Cloud: Wouldn't you notice the water running, the mirror fogged up? It's not too hard to know the signs of someone taking a shower.
Ada: Cloud, this is Leon we're talking about.
Cloud: Ah, point taken.

>>Sherry:AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I am going to be RAPED!!!!

QC: Oh good! A good old fashioned anime-style "anything outta the fetus stage is fair game" love making scene!
Cloud: You seem to know an awful lot about that sorta thing.
QC: . . . uh . . . nooooooo . . .

>>Leon:OH MY GOD SHERRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cloud: (Leon) Oh my god Sherry! Yes! Yes! Harder! Woo!
Aeris: Uh Cloud, do you have to make the motions when you do that?
Cloud: . . . back to the story . . . ^_^:*

>>Leon covered himself with a towel and quickly exited the bathroom,He ran upstairs and once again tripped on the disconnected phone line.

QC: Remember kids, don't learn from your mistakes, but repeat them several times throughout your lifetime to acheive "physical humor".
Others: Yes teacher!
Ada: That was humorous?

>>At that moment,Claire Redfield came out of her room and saw Leon on the floor...naked.

QC: (Claire) . . . 0.0 . . .
Cloud: (Leon) . . . ^_~ . . .
QC: (Claire) . . . >:( . . .
Cloud: (Leon) . . . 0.o . . .
QC: (Claire) . . . um, I ran outta faces . . .
Ada: Hey, just cause the writer's and anime fanatic pre-pubesant teen doesn't mean you have to be.
QC: . . . -.-:*
Cloud: . . . ^_^:*

>>Claire:AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!What are you doing naked!

Cid: If I had a %^*(*# nickel for everytime I've
been asked that question . . .
Others: ::blank stares::
Cid: . . . $#^$#!!! Keep going!!

>>Leon:CLAIRE!!!I can explain!

Cloud: (Leon) See, I was looking for my "special sock" when I fell out of my room! No, really!
QC: I swear, if this becomes a lemon . . .
Aeris: I like to think Claire has better taste. . .
QC: I like to think this MST is almost over. . .

>>Claire:I need no explanation!You wanted to F**K me!!!

QC: Okay! I knew it! MST over! I'm outta here!
Ada: No, not even an anime freak would take it this far.
Cloud: Wanna bet?

>>Leon:YES,I MEAN NO!!!!!!!

Ada: Then again . .

>>Claire put her hand over her mouth and ran back to her room.

Aeris: Good thing she did, or else she may have puked on him.
Ada: He'd like that.

>>Leon:Shit.

Cid: Shit.
Cloud: Shoot.
Aeris: Shnickeys.
QC: Wibble.
Ada: Stop it. That's stupid.
QC: Stop it. That's stinky.
Aeris: Stop it. That's dumb.
Ada: GRRR!

>>Leon went into his room and put on some clothes.

QC: There is a god!!!
Cloud: (Leon) Hmm, my pink jump suit or the violet one?

>>He went downstairs to the kitchen were Sherry was already eating breakfast.When they saw each other,they blushed.

QC: (Sherry) Gee, that violet jumpsuit looks kinky!
Cloud: (Leon) God that catholic school girl outfit turns me on!
QC: (Sherry) GET OVER HERE YOU SEX MACHINE - oh who the hell am I kidding? I can't even pretend Leon's a sex machine.

>>Leon:Sorry about this morning.

Aeris: (Leon) Yeah, I mean, I didn't mean to take those pictures of you in the shower . . .

>>Sherry just smiled and wiggled her eyebrows in a totally Hentai way.

QC: I KNEW IT!!!! There's your anime lingo coming in!
Aeris: Oh you little bishonen! How kawaii are you? Chibi chibi!

>>Leon just went to the stove,confused.He turned the stove on and the next thing he Knew was that his arm was on fire.

Cloud: Why the hell did-
QC: Just don't ask. Just don't.

>>Leon:SHERRY!!HELP!MY ARM IS ON FIRE!!!!!!!

Cloud: The roof, the roof, the roof is on fiiiiirrreeeee . . .
Cid: Shut up ya damn pansy!
Cloud: I am ashamed. I have sunk to Leon's level.
QC: A moment of silence
. . .
QC: Okay, back to this god awful fic!

>>Sherry came and got a bucket of water.

Aeris: Hmm, convinient.
Ada: Indeed.

>>She threw the water at Leon's burning arm.

Cid: Damn! Just let him burn!

>>Leon:Thanks Sherry.

After Claire and Sherry bandaged Leon's arm,Leon went outside to his car and discovered that it had a flat tire.

Cloud: Where'd Claire come from? I thought she was vomiting in the other room.
Ada: Must have gotten over it.

>>Leon:Shit

Cid: Shit.
Cloud: Shoot.
Ada: STOP!!!

>>Luckily,there was a small tire shop at the end of the street.

Aeris: Convinient.
Ada: Indeed.

>>On his way there,(By foot)

QC: No shit, by foot?
Ada: I would have assumed he'd take the Scooter.
QC: ::nods::
Cloud: Wha?

>>Leon was runned over by a parked car.

QC: I am gooded at grammer.
Cloud: That was funnied. This author is gooded.

>>Leon:I need a medic.

Cloud: Who the hell says 'medic'.
Cid: You just did.
Cloud: . . . sh-shut up!

>>After getting the tire and putting it on the car.

QC: This makes. Sense. To put a. Period there.

Ada: Fragment. Sentences good.

>>Leon was finally on his way to work.Unfortunately,Leon crashed into a unplanted tree and was forced to walk to work.At work Leon learned that he was fired!

QC: Oh the insanity!
Aeris: Poor Leon! What a ver bad, bad, EXTREMILLY bad day that was!

>>Leon:AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I think I am going to die!!!

QC: I know I want too!
Cloud: Ah ha! It's over! Thank jeebus!
Ada: Simpson's riffs? Bad bad. . .
Cloud: I ran out of original things to say.
Cid: D'oh!