One day Cloud and Tifa were walking along and Cloud fell on Tifa and Cloud said "What the hell let's have some hot steamy lovin'." Cloud and Tifa had some hot steamy lovin'.
Just then Aeris walked past. I don't know why because Cloud and Tifa were having some hot steamy lovin' and it isn't very polite to walk past people when they are having some hot steamy lovin'. Aeris realised she was walking past Cloud and Tifa having some hot steamy lovin' and she went "Oh no Cloud and Tifa are having some hot steamy lovin' boo-hoo Cloud does not want hot steamy lovin' with me damn I think I'll die again." Aeris died.
Meanwhile Sephiroth was getting very annoyed because he needed some hot steamy lovin' but the author would not give him some hot steamy lovin' because the author was upset with him for accidentally kicking a football into her mint plant and breaking it. He was especially annoyed because he had a three syllababble name and as anyone who needs hot steamy lovin' knows it is very difficult for the person on the end of the hot steamy lovin' to say a three syllababble word at important moments. Poor Sephiroth. Suddenly Sephiroth had an idea. "I'll go out to get some hot steamy lovin'" Yes that is what he said so he walked out and just then a net was thrown over him and Rufus Shinra jumped out of a corner and said "Ha-ha I've got you now I'm going to give you some hot steamy lovin'" Sephiroth thought that Rufus was very pretty and agreed to have some hot steamy lovin'.
Cid was in his plane busy flying and saying "Wee this is so funny hahahahahahahahaHA" yes that is what he was saying. Just then Shera walked in and said "Oh no Cid you don't care about my needs you just fly the plane and never give me hot steamy lovin' anymore boo-hoo" She threw down the tea and ran off to marry Palmer who at least appreciates her tea even though they physically can't have hot steamy lovin'. Just then Vincent popped out of a corner and said "Phew that was close come on Cid lets have some hot steamy lovin'" "@%£#£$^££#~'£%$%^£%&*@8%@*^&£@$@$%£$@%^@@&$%£^$&£%&^@?@?@" Said Cid which made Vincent very happy and they went off to have some hot steamy lovin'.
And Barrett did not have any hot steamy lovin' because he was looking after Marlene and daddies don't get hot steamy lovin', and he adopted Yuffie because her daddy tripped up on a banana skin and broke his ankle which killed him oh dear.
Everybody lived happily ever after except for Godo because he tripped up on a banana skin and broke his ankle which killed him oh dear.
The End