Artist: Shade Album: The Daniel Davis LP Song: Stan Spoofing: Stan Address: www.geocities.com/shade7x CHORUS: My games gone dead, I'm wondering why, I got out of bed at all the connection just dropped and I just went and lost it all... And even if I could it'd all be bugged, but your picture on my screen it reminds me that you're an absolute ~luv~ machine.... My games gone dead, I'm wondering why, I got out of bed at all the connection just dropped and I just went and lost it all... And even if I could it'd all be bugged, but your picture on my screen it reminds me that you're an absolute ~luv~ machine.... VERSE 1: Dear Shade, I wrote you but you still ain't ballin' I left my e-mail, my screen name, and my home phone at the bottom I sent two letters back at ten. They must have fallen into your Recycle Bin. It probably was a problem at GameFAQS or sumthin' Sometimes I scribble my posts too sloppy when I jot 'em But anyways, **** it, what's been up man, how's your ladies? I want to get the girlies too, I'm out to be a player If I get a blonde, guess what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna take her on a date. I read about your Alien too, I'm sorry I had a friend play that game and lose cause some ***** went and got him. I know you probably hear this everyday, but you've got the coolest hair. I even got the underground **** that you did with Square. I got a hard-drive full of your games and your pictures, man. I like the **** you did with the Deathmatch too, that **** was phat. Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back, just to chat Truly yours, your biggest fan, this is Stan. CHORUS: My games gone dead, I'm wondering why, I got out of bed at all the connection just dropped and I just went and lost it all... And even if I could it'd all be bugged, but your picture on my screen it reminds me that you're an absolute ~luv~ machine.... VERSE 2: Dear Shade, you still ain't called or wrote, I hope you have the chance. I ain't mad, I just think it's ****** up you don't answer fans. If you didn't want to talk to me in the chat room, you didn't have to, but you could have at least sent a link for Matthew. That's my little brother, man. He's only 42 years old. We had our font set to bold for you for 4 hours and ya just said no. That's pretty ****** man, you're like his ******' idol He wants to be just like you man, he likes you more than I do. I ain't that mad though; I just don't like bein' lied to. Remember when we met in GameFAQS, you said if I write you You would write back. See, I'm just like you in a way. I never knew my father neither. He wouldn't pay child support and he called my mom to say he'd beat her. I can relate to what you're sayin' in your posts. So when I have a ****** day, I drift away and load 'em on. Cause I don't really got **** else, so that **** helps when I'm depressed. I even got a tattoo with your name across the chest. (Shade7x) Sometimes I even chat with a girl just to find out her hopes and dreams. It's like adrenaline. The chick is like a sudden rush for me. See, everything you say is real, and I respect you 'cause you tell it. My girlfriend's jealous 'cause I talk about you 24/7. But she don't know you like I know you, Shade, no one does. She don't know what it was like for people like us growing up. You've gotta write me man. I'll be the biggest fan you'll ever lose. Sincerely yours, Stan. PS: We should be together too. CHORUS: My games gone dead, I'm wondering why, I got out of bed at all the connection just dropped and I just went and lost it all... And even if I could it'd all be bugged, but your picture on my screen it reminds me that you're an absolute ~luv~ machine.... VERSE 3: Dear Mr. "I'm too good to e-mail my fans" This'll be the last message I ever send your ass. It's been six days and still no word. I don't deserve it? I know you got my last two e-mails, I filled in the "To" box on 'em perfect. So this is my e-mail I'm sending you. I hope you see it. I'm on the web right now. I'm getting 90K per second. Hey Shade, "I erased my Windows folder, dare me to boot?" You know that FAQ by Joe Shifty from "Hacking At Night"? About that guy who could have saved that other guy from networking? But didn't? Then Joe saw it all on AOL and he found him? That's kinda how this is. You could have rescued me from floundering. Now it's too late. I've downloaded a thousand viruses now, I'm crashing. And all I wanted was a lousy e-mail to know you were alive. I hope you know I deleted all of your pictures of my drive. I love you Shade, we could have been together. Think about it. You ruined it now, I hope you can't surf and you think about it. And when you think, I hope you can't post and you cry about it. I hope your modem eats at you and you can't breathe without me. See Shade, {screaming} shut up *****, I'm trying to talk Hey Shade, that's my website screaming out of luck. But I didn't add a fatal error, I just locked it up, see I ain't like you. 'Cause if it's deleted, then it'll suffer more, and then it'll die too. Well, gotta go, my computer's almost sparking now. Oh ****, I forgot, how am I supposed to send this **** out? {crackle of wire, fizz of electronics, explosion of monitor} CHORUS: My games gone dead, I'm wondering why, I got out of bed at all the connection just dropped and I just went and lost it all... And even if I could it'd all be bugged, but your picture on my screen it reminds me that you're an absolute ~luv~ machine.... VERSE 4: Dear Stan, I meant to write you sooner, but my work's been a lot. You said your websites booming now, how many hits you got? Look, I'm really flattered you would want a blonde too. And here's an link for your brother: I pasted it over a logo of Mountain Dew, I'm sorry I didn't see you on AOL, I must have missed you. Don't think I did that **** intentionally, just to diss you. But what's this **** you said about falling in love with a girl too? To be a player you got to PLAY, there can't be any true love for you! You got some glitches, Stan, I think you need some Norton' To help your ass from bouncin' off the net like some bull snortin'. And what's this **** about how you ain't never been kissed? That type of **** will make me want to delete you from Buddy List. I really think you need to go find some blondes. Or maybe you just need to take a clue from James Bond. I hope you get to read this e-mail. I just hope it reaches you in time. Before you ruin your image, I think that you'd be doin' just fine If you'd chill out a little. I'm glad that I inspire you, but Stan! Why are you so mad? Try to understand that I do want you as a fan! I just don't want you to do some crazy ****. I seen this one **** on Yahoo a couple of hours ago that made me sick. Some dude was a punk and tore his whole website down, And he had precious game codes that weren't posted anywhere else around. And in the Data recovery center they found a mail, but it didn't say who it was to, Come to think about it...his name was...it was you. Damn.