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part 1
 

its cold down here
embracing deceit
the tears that fall as realization sets in that every cell,
every atom of my existence
is tainted with the stench of lies.
christ, even my tears are false
vision so contaminated its blind to the truth
reality abandoned so far back its memory is weatherworn and browbeaten into the unrecognizable pulp of a faded cracking photograph.
the fear that accompanies a knowing glance
the absolute terror of being discovered
someone will see through the mask and shadow to the frightened child beneath
sugary fingers pried from guilty grasp
its so deep down here
ive forgotten the path i followed
the path i took to get here
ive forgotten how to turn back.