Although ill never forget what happened But ill move on.

Guess I should start of by telling you all my name. My name is Serena Taylor.Im sixteen years old and has recently found out that I am pregnant. If it isn’t worse enough that im pregnant at such a young age there's more. My ex who is the father of my unborn child and I aren’t together. We dated for two years and they where the two best years of my life, and he was also my first. His name was Darien Shields, he was older than me by three years, which some times were a problem but our love always got past it. He was the one who broke up with me for some strange reason on the same night I was going to tell him the news. I wasn’t expecting him to break up with me because well everything was going great. The unfortunate part about that is he stole my heart and still has it. That night when I broke the news to him his face was the most puzzled I had ever seen it, I had no idea what was running through his head, which I usually did know. Out of sympathy he asked me to marry him, I guess its just what he thought the right thing to do was but to me it wasn’t the way I wanted to be asked I wanted it to be romantic and because he loved me not because of this. I said no, of course I would have been so happy to be his wife, but not under these circumstances.

Apparently he had found someone else, how I don’t know where he got the time to find this other girl but he managed. For some very odd reason I wanted him to be with her, why I don’t know, I guess because I thought it would make him happy so in return would make me happy as well. He promised me he would be the best father to this child and be there for me the whole way out, which kind of cheered me up at first. Its been a rough two months since I told him the news and I also had to tell my parents which was the hardest thing I ever had to do in my life. As you know a parent finding out there little girl is pregnant isn’t something they want to hear so when I told them they yelled and yelled and told me they never wanted to see me again. I think it was harsh and it broke my heart even more then it was already broken which I didn’t know was possible but was. This whole thing has been a complete disaster, im living on my own now in a very crappy apartment, it might not be the best but it’s somewhere to live. Now you might be thinking how could I afford this well Darien pays the rent and I on the other hand have to pay for the food which you know being pregnant could be very hard to do but for some reason im still holding on. I want everything to be alright but its so hard to move on when he has something that I want back; my heart.

It was the end of the week and it was time for me to call Darien to let him know what was going on and when I had my next appointment. During this whole thing I had tried to be strong, maybe I should have mentioned that I was still very heart broken and would cry continuously. I wiped away some of the tears I had been crying and tried to gather my self together before I had to talk to him. If you think I sound upset now you should have seen me a few weeks ago I was a wreck and everyone knew it, I didn’t smile once for one month straight but now I guess I smile but not a true smile. Now on with this phone call, as the phone rang I probably should have mentioned that his new girlfriend the one who replaced me lives with him. I should fill you in on her; she was pretty and a lot skinner than me and from what ive seen of her pretty nice too. I find it so odd that we always hate the girl and never the guy even though he’s the one we should be mad at we always blame the other girl, I guess its just easier to get mad at her than the guy your still head over heels in love with.

My thoughts where interrupted when someone finally answered the phone and just my luck it was her.

“Hello”

“May I please speak to Darien?” I requested

“Sure one second, this is Serena right?”

“Yea"

I listened to the short conversation they had in the background. She was calling him honey and I could even hear them kissing. I never was rude to this girl not once even though I hated her with a passion and here she was rubbing it right in front of me too.

“Hello” he spoke.

“Hi Darien, its me Serena. I just wanted to let you know that tomorrow I have an appointment but it’s just a check up so you don’t need to come.”

“You sure? I don’t mind coming”

“Oh no you don’t have to come”

“Alright, but if you change my mind you know my number”

“Okay bye”

I hung up the phone instantly; I hated how he was so nice. I know it was just a phone call and that he wasn’t that nice but all those little things he did where my everything. Sometimes I actually wished that he were mean so that it would be easier to hate him but life never goes the way you want it to or at least mine doesn’t. That night I fell asleep with my headphones on and mascara running down my cheeks, listening to that song that reminds me of him.

The next day I didn’t do much I just went to my doctor’s appointment and enjoyed my Saturday. I actually hung out with my favorite friends in the whole world, which wasn’t really important because I was always with them. Maybe I should tell you a little bit about them. Well there’s ray, mina, Amy and Lita. Ray is the one I always argue with but in the sister kind of way. Mina is like a double of me, we both like the same things and some people even say we look alike. Amy is the smarter one of the group and she is amazing at giving advice too. Then there’s Lita she’s more of a tomboy but the best cook I know. Over all what can I say there the bestest friends I could ask for.

It was at Ray’s temple that we always meet, there we usually just ate, talked and unfortunately even studied. My friends where the only ones besides Darien who actually have been with me through out the pregnancy. When I finally left after three hours, I was kind of happy to leave because even thought I laughed and smiled when I was with them it was still all fake because deep down I was falling apart. Tomorrow I had planned to go shopping to just go and pick up a few things like food and some other things too.

In the morning I got up and got ready I just brushed my hair and threw on anything and headed out. While I was out shopping I caught a few people starring at me I got that reaction a lot from people and I knew exactly what they where thinking too ‘She’s pregnant and at such a young age’. During the time I was thinking of this I guess I wasn’t really paying attention to where I was going because I bumped into some guy.

“Im sorry I wasn’t watching where I was going” I apologized

“It’s okay, you sure I didn’t hurt you?”

“ No, no im fine thank you”

“My name is Seiya”

“And im Serena, its nice to meet you”

“Serena what would you say if I asked you on a date?”

“Id say yes”

“So ill see you tomorrow night at the restaurant ‘moon palace’ at 7?”

“I cant”

“oh how come?” he said in a kind of disappointed look.

“Because you never actually asked me” I chuckled

“Serena will you go out with me tomorrow night?” he smiled

“id love too”

I thought about that date a lot after I had ran into Seiya, He was a handsome man and seemed really great. I don’t really know what came over me a lot of guys hit on me during the two months but never once did I say yes. I was in love with Darien I knew it and my heart knew it, but there was something different about this guy. I couldn’t wait till the date but it was just a date right? I was still in love with Darien but come on I had too more on eventually he did or that’s what I kept telling myself. Maybe this date with Seiya would be the start of something new.

The Next day at 7

I had been ready for over an hour now and I kept looking at my reflection in the mirror, you couldn’t tell I was pregnant yet. I walked to the restaurant, which actually wasn’t that far from where I lived and met Seiya in front of the restaurant. The date went better than I thought it would. I learnt a lot about Seiya, he was 23 had just started working at this big office and had just bought his first house. I also realized that him and I had a lot in common. I don’t know what is wrong with me all the guys I meet seem to be so much older than me. Darien was 21 and Seiya was 23 there was huge age gabs there. He seemed like a great guy someone I could enjoy hanging out with.

Nothing really important has happened in between the past 3 weeks besides ive gotten bigger and I continued to see Seiya.I really don’t know what is wrong with my heart, by now I would have been head over heels for Seiya but for some stupid reason my heart just wouldn’t let go of Darien. I knew he wouldn’t ever be mine but there was a little part of me that truly believed that one-day, just one day he would be mine again. I still felt kind of bad for Seiya because we were dating but I was still in love with Darien. He was always very sweet to me but when I kissed him I just didn’t feel the same sparks I did when I kissed Darien. One Night he came over and we rented some movies and just enjoyed each other’s company. Half way through our movie the doorbell rang. I went to the door to see who it was and shockingly enough it was Darien.

“Hey Darien, its been a while ive missed you”

“Serena, I tried calling your cell but no one answered and wanted to tell you something important and to check up on you”

“Oh sorry, what is it?”

“Well im leaving tonight on a business trip. I wont be back for about a month” he said

“Oh”

“Will you be alright?”He asked

“Yea, ill be fine. Seiya will take care of me.” I said with a smile.

“Seiya? Who’s Seiya?”

“My boyfriend”

“WHAT! You have a boyfriend?”

“Darien don’t act all jealous you moved on why cant I?”

“Serena just wait, im sorry”

“Good bye Darien” I said as I slammed the door.

I turned around only to see Seiya just starring at me with a look of jealousy in his eyes. I knew this look well enough to know that he was jealous.

“What?” I demanded

“Nothing Serena, Who’s what that?”

“No one”

“Okay fine lie to me. I know that was your ex”

“Then why did you ask?”

“You know what I don’t need this bullshit.”

He shoved me away from the door and left. Just like that he left.

Later than night as I was lying down on my bed thinking. The old me before all of this would have been crying while eating her mouth out but not now. I had changed so much, I have grown up so quickly and even I knew it. It seemed like just yesterday I was worried about showing my mom my math test but now I was worried about becoming a mother. I began to tear up when my thoughts where broken and I was forced to wipe away the tears because I heard the door.. When I opened it, it was Seiya.

“Serena im so sorry”

“What ever Seiya”

“Don’t what ever me babe, im trying to be nice”

I don’t know who he thought he was ,the way he thought I should just forgive him because he said sorry. Sorry is just a word, people can say it but it doesn’t mean they mean it. He reached in for a kiss and I shoved him off. He smelt like pure alcohol and I knew this wasn’t going to be fun.

“Seiya leave me alone okay.”

“Alone? No way babe”

He gave me this sneaky look which I knew wasn’t going to lead something horrible. So many thought began to overflow my mind, mostly about what I thought he was going to do. I paused myself and told myself something 'this is Seiya its not like he would hurt you' I was right Seiya might of been drunk but he would never hurt me would he? He began to pull my arms towards him and then tugged me towards my bedroom. It was at the moment one thought entered my mind, the one thought I was trying to avoid but at this moment, it just seemed to fit the moment. I tried to stop him my using my feet as a break so I wouldn't budge but it wasn’t working he was too strong for me. I grabbed on to the nearest wall and began to beg and cry.

“Fine want to be this way I wont be nice about it”

“That was being nice?” I sobbed

I don’t know what came over me to say such a thing to him when I knew that he was drunk and god at this point I had no clue what he wanted from me. He just nodded and picked me up carrying me over to my bed. He slammed the door and pushed me on the bed and began to kiss me. He began to ripe of my shirt off and kiss me all down my collarbone. I was so petrified, I was so confused. I began to scream even louder because I knew the horrible thought that I had been thinking was going to become reality. He quickly got off me and went over to my dresser. I was so relived that he stopped, I knew he wouldn’t hurt me, he wasn’t thinking right that had to be it.

“Thank you for stopping”

“Oh I wasn’t stopping trust me”

He looked over toward me with a pair of socks in his hands. He came towards me and shoved them into my mouth and continued to do what he wanted. I felt so violated like I have never been in my entire life. He continued to take of my clothes piece by piece making it even more harder for me. I had only had sex once and it was with Darien and it was for love. This wasn’t love and it wasn’t what I wanted. I tried to squirm but there was no use. After all the squirming I finally shut my mouth I knew there was no use he had it in his mind and he was going to do it. I remember my first time it hurt but love conquered the pain but the way Seiya was doing it hurt so much. The way he grabbed on to me it felt like he bruised me, which he probably did. After 30 minutes of the torture of him just laughing at me while violating me at the same time I finally passed out.

I woke up and the memories of what happened came rushing back to me like a bad nightmare that I had lived. I looked around to see where I was to find that I was in my room and I looked around but Seiya wasn’t around. I looked down at myself and I was completely naked, I began to cry. It was the worst experience I had ever had in my life, even worse than telling my parents about being pregnant. I ran to the bathroom and took a bath. I scrubbed my self so hard, I wanted to pretend it never happened, it couldn’t of happened Seiya seemed so nice he wouldn’t do this too me. I began to lie to myself hoping I would believe my own lies but there was no use, he raped me and it was reality. As I washed myself I noticed several bruises on my body. Mostly on my thighs but there where other ones too. After my bath I looked at myself in the mirror and saw all the bruises, all the pain I had just endured. I couldn’t believe the person i was looking at in the mirror was me, I had been such a happy person but now I was utterly numb and disgusted with myself. Not for being raped but for letting him do it. I thought about it the rest of the night due to the fact I couldn’t get a moment of sleep.

Now, it had been a complete week and no word of Seiya.I would say I was happy but happy was something I didn’t think I could ever be again, it was more like relieved. I was lying down because I didn’t feel well like I hadn’t been lately but was disturbed by the door. I opened the door to only reveille Seiya, I was so Disoriented because of the shock and fear. My first instinct was to close and lock the door as fast as possible, which apparently was not the thing to do. He pushed the door super hard, which made it fling open and swing me towards me, which made me go flying. He went to my kitchen and poured some water as I just sat there bewildered. He came to me with water in one hand and picked me up in the other and swung me over is back. I tried to testify but there was no use, I was getting what I deserved because I wasn’t stopping him. When we were in my room and the door had been closed he reached in his pocket and pulled out a pill.

“Take this”

“What is it?”

“It’s a pill dumby, it will make you out of it because if I have to hear any of your lame whining I might kill someone”

“I don’t want one”

“you will take it”

“ no”

As I spoke he shoved the pill in to my mouth and coved both my mouth and nose.

“You will swallow it if you want to breathe”

I tried not to swallow it but I had no chose I needed air so I swallowed it. After I had swallowed it he gave me the water that I chugged down and only a few minutes later after half of my clothes had been torn off did it start to kick in. Everything began to get blurry and right before I knew I was going to pass out one thought came to mind. ‘This is a drug in my system, what about the baby’. After that I passed out so I had no clue what he was doing to me.

I woke up again in my bed naked, it felt like deja vu. Although this time I found my room all messed up, the little things I did have where thrown all over the place. I looked around and it reminded me of the last time I was raped, Everyday since that day I told myself it never happened but this was twice now it was not a dream. I tried to get up but the pain was too horrible, but somehow I managed.

“Hello?”

“Oh your up”

I heard, as the persons voice got closer to the bedroom. Then it hit me it was Darien's voice. What was he doing here? He walked in to the room and passed me a nightgown. I threw it on quickly and sat up.

“What are you doing here?”

“Well, I got back early and wanted to come and see you”

“oh, what happened to my room?”

“When I came the door was open so I came in and when I came I saw Seiya on top of you and at first I thought you know you where just having sex but that was until I noticed you where unconscious and basically I punched him a few times and he left”

“Oh”

“Was it the first time?”

I didn’t answer.

“Was it?”

“I don’t know”

“What do you mean you don’t know?”

“Well I know but-”

“But what?”

“Okay it was the second time”

“Serena, why didn’t you tell me? Anyways that doesn’t matter now, lets get you to a hospital”

“No”

“you need to you can damage the baby”

“Im too ashamed to disgusted with my self”

He came closer to me and sat beside me.

“Don’t be, the only person who should be disgusted is that awful guy”

“But I let him, it was my fault I couldn’t stop him, im a whore”

“Listen to me, If you said no it was rape, which means it wasn’t your fault, if he’s to strong for you than that’s not controllable. Do you understand?”

I nodded.

We went to the hospital where I was examined all over my body and they ran a few test. Through out the whole thing I felt so alone because Darien was forced to stay in the waiting room where I couldn’t hold his hand, to hear everything would be fine. I was told that the baby was fine and that the drugs weren’t harmful because it was such a small dosage, as well as I was going to be okay and that I just had some bruising but would be all right. It was kind of hard but Darien was with me so I was all right. After we left there we were headed to the police station. I filled out along with Darien, which seemed to be a million papers and answered several questions. They told us they would go to Seiya’s place and arrest him for 48 hours and try to get a court day. We didn’t ask much due to the fact the police office told us they would keep in touch.

After that we went into his car and he drove us to his apartment. During the whole time not one word was spoken. I guess I was kind of still in shock that my world had turned so upside down. Obviously Darien didn’t want to say something wrong because the whole way to his place I saw him looking at me and going to say something but didnt. When he finally opened the door to his apartment I walked in and sat on his leather couch.

“Where’s ray?”

“Well about that I need to tell you something”

“Alright”

“Well I don’t know where to start but here it goes. I loved you when I broke up with you and I still do but about a week before I broke it off I got a letter in the mail. It basically said that if I didn’t end it they would kill you and if I tried to get the cops involved they would find out and kill you, either way I was screwed. And I know what you must be thinking about ray. Well, she’s a friend of mine I asked her to help me out so I could try to get you to hate me so it wouldn’t be hard for you but I guess I made it worse. Im so sorry, I was only looking out for your best interest and I never did a thing with ray only kissed in front of you and those kisses meant nothing”

It was the most wonderful feeling in the world to know that he actually did feel the same way about me. Although it did kind of hurt that he kissed that girl several times even though I kissed Seiya, damn I even slept with the guy. Yes I know he raped me but it was practically my fault. I only wanted one thing now and that was what I had been longing for.

“Kiss Me,” I asked him more like demanded.

He reached in and pulled my chin up to his and kissed me. After the kiss ended I spoke.

“Can I see the letter?”

“ Of course”

He handed me the letter and it read:

Darien,

You don’t know who I am but I know you. I knew everything about you and Serena. I want Serena to be mine and will go to any length to get her. I know you must be thinking that I wont do anything to her because I want her but trust me I will. You either break up with her or else I will kill her. I am being serious. Oh yea and if you try to contact the cops well then I will kill both of you. Yours truly,
your worst nightmare.

At this exact moment I couldn’t breathe, as I finished the last line of the note I felt my heart stop. Many thoughts running through my head but not one word could be spoken. I looked down at the letter still in my shaky hands as I realized a small tear on the paper. I hadn’t realized the fact I had been crying. Before I could wipe away one of my tears I was pulled in to a hug by Darien. I looked up at him to see him looking at me as well.

“Serena, Everything will be fine trust me”

I did nothing but nod.

About 1 month later.

Its been a complete month now and Ive been so stressed out about the court trial today. Which as you all know being 4 months pregnant and stressed don’t really go together. This whole month with Darien has been almost perfect, exept for the whole having to find a lawyer and dealing with all this. Ive tried to talk to Darien telling him we should just forget about it. Most people would want to put that ass in jail although I just want to forget about it and move on. Ive tried for an entire month but no luck, i have to go to the trial today.

Im now in front of my mirror trying to fix up my make up. Darien then comes from behind me and kisses me on the cheek. I look up at him and smile but he knows that inside im falling to a million pieces, today is going to be on of the hardest days of my life and we both know it.

"Come on beautiful, Lets get this over with and move on with our lives together"

I nodded in agreement and we both got up and went to his car. The drive was yet another quiet one and when we arrived at the court there was so many cameras and news crew. We walked up the stairs to the large doors as many reports came up to us asking questions like "what was your relationship with Mr. Kou?" And "Is it true that you where engaged?" There were so many questions although I just ignored all of them and went inside.

I sat down with my lawyer and Darien beside me and waited for the judge to be seated. When he was and got the papers ready I saw a bunch of guards come in with Seiya in hand cuffs. It was at the moment I lost it I began to tear up, although I knew I would end up doing that anyways.The judges began to talk and telling everyone in the court room and the jury the whole case. It was then it was my time that i had to go up to the stand for questioning.

"Miss. Taylor would you please come to the stand” the judge asked

I nodded and went to be seated. Then the guard came up with the book and i swore to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth. It was Seiya’s Lawyer that was first to question me, which I knew, would be tuff.

"So, Serena is it?"

I nodded.

"You where dating Seiya weren’t you?"

I nodded again.

"Now what is it your claiming my client did to you?"

"Well, he drugged me once and raped me twice” I chocked out

"How could he drug you? isn’t it your choice to swallow or not?"

"I had no choice, he was holding both my mouth and nose shut untill I would swallow and I needed air"

"my client says you wanted to sleep with him, so why would he need a drug?"

"I didn’t, he raped me"

"How was this? Was it after the sex you decide it was a mistake?"

"No, I told him no before"

"Where you clear about this to him?"

"I don’t know how much clearer I could have been, I yelled and I screamed"

All this came rushing back to me now, all the memories everything. I began to cry like I had never in my life. The judge noticed I was a wreck and told me I could take my seat. When I took my seat Darien comforted me with a hug and a quick peck on the head. Now it was Seiya’s turn I was so scared of the lies he would tell.

So my lawyer standed and began to question him.

"Miss. Taylor said that you stuffed a sock in her mouth while you raped her"

"That’s how she liked it ruff. And trust me the way she enjoyed it wasn’t rape"

"The doctors said that she had many bruises from the rape"

"Like I just said, she liked it ruff"

"Did Serena ever tell you to stop?"

"Never all she said was harder"

"Mr. Shields said that he walked in on you raping her while she was unconscious"

"She just looked it she was just having a good time"

"So, Mr.Kou how does it feel to of raped a young girl. You know you will probably go away for a very long time, seeing that she is a minor"

"The little bitch got what she wanted. Plus she shouldn’t of dated an older guy if she didn’t know that he would want some sooner or later. Call it rape if you want but all I know is that it was fun and id do it again"

"I rest my case"

This whole thing was over whelming to watch and to hear. I felt as if i was in a horror movie and I was the main victim. We had a 15 minute recess well they decided Seiya’s time, while I mostly cried in Darien’s arms. After the recess we went back inside where the judge announced that Seiya would be doing 15 years without parole. He was furious he tried to fight of the guards but they tackled him and then brought him in the police car. Darien and I walked out side of the courtroom where we had a minute alone before we had to go outside where all the reporters were. I strangely looked at Darien as he began to kneel on one knee.

"Serena, I love you. And i know you cant get married until you turn 18 but we can be engaged for two years if you’ll do me the honor of being your husband. Will you marry me?"

"Of course"

He slid the ring on to my finger and got up off his knee and kissed me.When we stopped kissing he looked closely into my eyes.

"Lets start off our new life together"

I nodded and we held hands as we walked out of the doors and into our new life.

5 years later…

Its been a long 5 years of my life, Im now 21 years old and am happier than I have ever been in my entire life. So many things have happened in my life which I wish hadn’t but unfortunately they did. I don’t regret what happened because I believe if they hadn’t of happened I wouldn’t be where I am today. Maybe I should fill you in on what I have been up to the last few years. I gave birth to a beautiful little girl a few months after the trial. Her name is Rini and she is now 5 years old. I guess with how great my life was going at this point you would assume I would more on and totally forget about Seiya but now quite. A few months after Rini was born Darien and I went to a very fancy hotel for a night while the girls looked after Rini.Now, This is where the thing with Seiya really got me. It was one of the most expensive hotels there were and it was a couple sweet, Sounds perfect huh? Well Darien And I were planning on making love that night together for the first time since I got pregnant and I really thought I was ready for it, but that was before my past caught up to me.

Flash Back

He carried me in his arms bridal style and carried me over to the bed. We began to kiss and well that leaded to more and before i knew it he was undressing me. I was smiling at him every moment it was then after he unhooked my bra i got a flash back. It was of the night Seiya raped me, everything came rushing back to me. I thought i had gotten on with my life you know but I didn’t think it would come back and hurt as much as it the day he did. During this whole time Darien was still kissing me. I guess I blanked out because he was already moving on to undoing my pants. I looked up at Darien and he looked back at me and smiled. It was out of pure impulse when i looked back at Darien I saw Seiya’s face.

"Seiya get off me please I said no" I yelled

He got off of me quickly and looked at me .

"Serena, im Darien. Why did you call me Seiya?"

"Im sorry Darien old memories ya know?"

"Its okay, but i want you to know i would never do what he did to you. Are you sure you want to? i could wait you know."

"No Darien its fine. Its not fair to make you wait forever"

"babe, My love with you could wait forever"

"No im sure im ready"

It was with those word he spoke to me i knew i was ready to completely move on. To forget and move on.

End of flashback

It was an amazing night, I remember that morning when i woke up that I didn’t regret it at all. Anyways, Did I tell you my amazing job yet? Well, I get to watch movies for a living. Sounds great h doesn’t it? It is, I get to go see new movies for free and then all i have to do is write about them and the pay is really high too. Darien on the other hand he’s a doctor, One of the best there is out there.

There hasn’t been much going on in my life besides that. Darien and I still love each other just as much as the day we said I do. He truly is the best man in the whole world and an amazing father. To tell you the truth im actually pregnant,Im planning on telling him the news tonight.Im sure he will take it well.

Also about three years ago my parents contacted me. They said how they truly missed me and saw everything on the news and had only gotten around to calling me now because they were scared I wouldn’t forgive them. I know what they did was wrong but they said how truly sorry they were and everyone makes mistakes right? They where great parents for 16 years and just because they weren’t there for me when I really needed them its alright.Now all that is in the past, I have everything I could ever ask for a wonderful husband ,a gorgeous little girl and my parents back in my life. Although ill never forget what happen but ill move on.

Heey readers:)
I hope you like it.
Its sort of like if you truly love someone but I changed it up a lot and think its much better.
Its a big story in one thing .
Please R&R.