why do you always stay online when you leave? its annoying... kause i always wanna talk to ya... but i never kno if you'll get the messages...hmmm.... im bored... you fell asleep....put me in yer profile :)... just put mee in there so i'll feel special... ight? okies... wut else kan i talk bout....im really bored...kan ya tell? i need to find sumone that will stay up wid mee... every one goes to sleep at like 12 er sum shit... my fukkin day begins at like 10.... i get every thing done after 12... i kleen and i draw and i write poetry and all that shit after 12.... (im doin the random thought thing if ya havent noticed yet.... hope ya get ta read this shit) ya eva stayed up all night and just watched it get slowly brighter outside? not watchin the sun rise but watchin the grass and trees slowly bekum green.... its weird... in the dark everything looks gray... i dunno wutever.....my hands hurts erg... whoops i just hit then enter button and the message was too big..... i think thats funny... maybey i wont even send this .... i dunno... you probly wont read it all anyway... maybey i'll save it and give it to ya tomaro :).... this might b interesting in the morning when im not all weird and shit...one fish two fish red fish blu fish.... hehe i have the book on tha shelf ova there... i was readin it to kyle the otha night... yupp yupp...i havent talked to him in like 3days... woder where he went... im usaly talkin to him everyday... hmm... krazy shit... lalala... i got sum ambient trance shit goin down ova here ... its weird.... whoa theres the bassline....bad ass...aw... i didnt finish d/lin thatsong... grr.... i gotta get me sum dj shit... thats wut im gonna do when i grow up (i feel like a kid sayin that lol) im gonna b a dj... that'd b bad ass... make music... always wanted too....gotta get sum money... erg that means i gotta get a job huh... Wal-Mart... hehe :) im gonna werk at walmart... kant ya picture that... haha krazy... ive been typin fer like 15 mins... i type fast too... this is sum long shit here... im gonna keep typin till i get tired :)... proof read this shit... make sure everything is a werd....haha i miss spelled proof... i gots a krazy ass way of speelin shit dont i? i use k's and e's alot huh? weird....erg i wasnt on yahoo OR icq... gotta get on line.... lalala... you need to stop sleepin lol.... wake up and talk to mee....you've been betta bout kallin mee :) im so happy... ya still dont kall me durin tha day tho... only after 10.... oh well....i hate reading things outloud... i just feel so stoopid when i do that shit.... like readin books outloud and things i write and shit...yeah...i'lll.... uh... i forgot what i wsa goonna say... damn the drugs....maybey its not the drugs... maybey its the lack of sleep... but i do get enough sleep.... just not at the same tyme as otha ppl... i usualy get 7-9 hours of sleep... from like 4 to 1ish... erg i dont kno wut tyme it is... i gotta like go to 5 different rooms ta find out what tyme it is... this klok is all fuked up and the klok in my room is too and then the kloks in the kitchen are never right... and i kant read non-digital kloks... i dunno why... i used to b able too liek till 3 years ago... hmmm thats when i started doin drugs... lol... maybey thats it ... drugs affect my tyme telling abilities... no dont think so lol... im just stoopid.... i only kno one other person that kouldnt read em... RaChelle.... shes bad ass... soo sweet too... maybey you kno her? maybey not... shes got a brouther names shawn.... gornic... i think thats their last name... dunno...sumthin like that... ers my hands hurt again... wheres that damn arm wrest thinggie... ahh there it is....ok thats better... not really ... the keyboard is too far down now... need to get it up hmmm....book.... haha its the bible...erg its all wobbly fuk this shit the bible any use full fer NUDDIN.... gawd... my dad is tryin ta get me ta go ta church and shit wid him... i hate stoopid christians...if they only knew half the things i am.... steryotypes suk ass... ya kno that shit? if i told my dad im a witch he'd thik i worship satan... we dont even BELEIVE in a satan or any form of evil...its fukkin stoopid... if i told him i do drugs he'd think im a addict... im not... i do em when i want... i kould never do anything again if i wanted too... seriously... but i dont want too... i think there a good thing for mee... its not like im smoken krak everyday or shootin up herion and shit.. i just eat a tab or poke sum smot every now and then... thats all... im fukkin hungry.... its dinner tyme... lol i eat breakfast at 2... i eat a small brunch at 6... i eat lunch at 10 and i eat dinner at 4 lol its pretty fukked up.... to go allong wid my sleeping habbits... i woke up today at liek 2 and i watched tv ... and then jackie kalles mee... then jessica kalles mee .... awww i love jess... wonder if she still likes me??? hmmm... i'd love ta go bak out wid her.... omg... shes goin bak out wid mason and well never mind bout that lol... i wont say it... bak to my story...jackie kalles jess kalles then jackie kalles again and the next thing i kno its 630.... i was like wut? where did the day go? its not like i did anything either... i watched mtv2 and that 60's movie... thats all that i kan remember doin... thats like 2 hours worth of tyme there... where was the rest of it? ok im gonna go see wut kind of food we got... brb... ::korny music plays like when they put you on hold for the doctor::... okies... omg... i fukkin kum in the room and look at the screen and its all words... the WHOLE thing is werds... i dint kno i typed that much.... nutra grain bars... yummiescereal bars with wheat, whole-grain oats and fruit... lol thats there slogan.. how shitty... this is all i kould get too eat ::takes a bite:: the damn refirgerator ::another bite:: is too ::another:: damn loud when i open it up ::last bite:: erg im thirsty now :( im gonna have to open the refrigerator... well if i never kum bak its kause my dad woke up and thinks im on crack... brb.... ::music plays again::... water .... YUMM.... you kno you lose alot of weight if ya dont drink carbonated drinks... i used ta weigh lie 120... now a weigh like 110.... 10 lbs... kause i stoped drinkin coke and DR P. i do everynow and then if i dont feel like sleepin or if im eatin out... but thats it... i also stoped eatin fast food... i think thats most of it actualy... and i only eat when im hungry...yeah i see all these "loose 30 lbs in 1 week" things online and on TV.... all ya gotta do really to lose weight is stop drinkin carbonation and only eat when rou actualy hungry.... it werks :) i kno i sound anorexic er sum shit talkin bout loosin weight... dont i? (erg my music stoped) im not actualy im happy wid my body... cept fer my lil false belly button lol... ive had so many ppl ask me bout that.. you remember that shit... that one dood outside randals er wherever... he was all WHERE THE FUK IS YER BELLIBUTTON? lol yeah then that weekend i had my mum say sumthin bout it and sum otha ppl...its krazy... i should get a tatoo bein all "<---- not my bellibutton" ::teeheehee:: kinda like ash's birthmark... ooooo i saw her today :) she kame bu my house :) gave mee me cds bak and showed mee her drawings of mee:) shes soo sweet... ok well my brain just kinda died on mee..... erg... i need a new bed.... i hate mine... its a fukkin water bed and its liek 4 feet off the ground... i want sumthin thats liek 4 inches off the ground... i kant like roll outa bed... if i do i'd probly die... lol... "cause of death: falling out of bed" that'd be hilarious... my brother's bead at my mum's house is perfect... its like a foot off the ground the matress kinda sux tho... maybey i should just buy a matress and put it on my floor... i dunno of anyone that has a low bed.... there all like 3 feet high... jackies is kinda low... only like 2 feet.... hmm.... i love her bed... its so fun... cept wne her and kevin r on it and im sitin of there tryin to focus all my attention on tha music lol .... that was horrable... eva had that happen? its very awkward... AHHHH 4:21 cronic tardienes... ya seen that stiker? its great... i sowed my mum she was all AWESOME.... i dont think she got it lol... shes kewl tho... we got alot in kommon lol... she's kewl wid me bein a par-tay kid too.... she's just gotta go in and look around first... she drove me and jackie and kevin to my first party... it was kev's too.... i think that was the furst tyme he did E... i dunno... probly nott... i was sober... i wish i wasnt... i wanted to see it through sober eyes and actualy remember it... it was kewl tho... didnt really meet no one... gave alot of ppl smiles tho :) that was great... ppl would b walkin past mee and i would b dancin all around and shit and they'd walk way outa mypath and gimme that smile like " your such a kandEkid" lol it was a good thin tho.... i had like kande up too my elbows and this lil croped beater on and my blu pants... and a sweater tied around my waist.... gawd damn i was all kande'd out...actualyim wearin the same shirt right now :) i love this shirt... mason bought it fer mee.... he wont talk to me now.... omg this is kraxy you gotta hear why... erg i gotta find the E-mail... hold up.....ok here we go... these are his exact words "i dont wanna talk to you because ur strange ur different and iv movded on and id ont want anything to do wit anybody like that i dont even wanna talk to them it disgusts me" .... now you tell me wut the hell that means? i am not doind anything he wasnt when we went out.... he wore phat pants ALL the tyme... he smokes weed, ciggs, poped pills... he did it all... he still smokes i kno that... hes like a fukkin hick now.... aw... why hasnt roger kalled mee.... how sad... he'd said he'd kall mee.... that was like 3 days ago.... poor mee... ok im sorry... ill stop talkin bout guys... i kno how ya get... yer so kute when yer madd tho... hehe... omg.. remember when you were mad at me kause you thought i had a thing fer sean? that was so kute lol... okies sorry... :) "little fluffy klouds" this song is bad ass.... i dont think im gonna sleep at all tonight... damn the caffiene... why the hell dont i have my head phones on? im all listin to it quiet and shit... erg... gotta have loudness.... i duno where r they are....floor....wut the hell were they on the floor for? dunno.... lalala... Uberzone.... im gonna listen to them... my mum got me sum sampler wid them on it... well 2 actualy... there gonna b at that par-tay the 23 er whenever if we go :).... aw i wanna go to that bad.. i wanna see keoki....and d-fuse and bruno b and ak 1200... ooo thats gonna b a badass set... ak 1200... so is uberzone.... yupp... and method! omg there gonna b basass i hope... chrystal method... wonder wut my mum would say if she knew thats wut they were kalled lol... lalala.... its fukkin 5.... gawd damn....ive been typin fer like 2 hours.... im gonna kount my mp3's hehe... this might take a while :P..... 989.... thats alot... i wanna see how big it is.... oooh no wait i for got one...so thats 990... kewl... gonna see how big they are now.... gawd damn.... 3 gig.... exactly 3.19 gig.... my whole pc is 14 gig and all thats being used is 6.17.... so HALF of the used space on my pc is my mp3 collection... thats pretty damn funny... i got 8 more gig to fill up :)..... gawd damn... stoopid dialup peice of shit....i need dsl... my mum has it at her house and its great... i fukkin downloaded the AIM softwear in like 2 minutes... here it takes like 20.... i bet i kould d/l this song in like 2 seconds lol... that'd b bad ass.... how much does dsl cost? erg i need a job... i need to buy drugs... lol thats horrable isnt it?.... my daddy is gonna wake up in like a hour... hes gona b all wut the fuk? im gonna b all i woke up at 6 and kouldnt get bak to sleep..... lol... i lye so much to them :).... its ok tho thats wut there there for isnt it?.... gawd damn its downloading at .26k/s.... its gonana take like 3 hours.... grr.... its hot in here.... Kenna - "Hell Bent" .... you seen this video? its sum triped out shit... its in this gray scale shit and theres this inventer... its all claymation... they all look like E.T. too... there not skary tho.... but theres this inventor and he werks in this place that makes these things kalled "happy" there like goggles that maky you happy... and he werks there its like an asembly line... and he goes home every night and hes not happy wid his life so he discides to invent his own goggles... he makes em all um bt theres sumthing missing... then one day at werk hes on a break and goes and sits in the closit and hes got this lil door on his tummy... he opens it up and its all bright and shining and colourful in there... so he goes home nad takes sum of thatstuff and puts it in the eye peices of the goggles and then puts em on..... this is where it gets good... when he looks through em EVERYTHING is brightly coloured and beautifull...so he starts manufacturing these... he markets them as "bliss".... then one day hes sittingin his big office wid his big comfy chair... takes off the goggles and you see him... hes all sad loking... he opens his door on his tummy and theres no more bright shiny stuff... its all gone... he gave up his happieness for other ppl to have it... then theres this twinkeling far away in the distance so he gets up and goes to his window and the kamra zooms aroind buildings and shit and it kum to this roof top... theres a merry go round... i think thats wut there kalled.... ya get on them and push and it goes around in a circle? yeah... (note that all the "ppl" are gray and sad looking unless you have the goggles on) well on this merry go round there are these kids playing.. its all normal cept one thing... there all bright yellow or orange or green.... the children of the product "bliss"... then it fades out and in the lil circle before everything disapears it says "more" dunno why... its just trypped out... erg... 530... im gonna go see if i kan sleep.... ill b bak later probly... FUKKIN[]HOME!